tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-59796637374044749352024-03-18T22:33:21.249+00:00The World According To MeBecause everyone needs to let off steam and I do it more than most...Phil Hallhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12680058800847509275noreply@blogger.comBlogger778125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5979663737404474935.post-61002923528374922372024-03-16T11:25:00.000+00:002024-03-16T11:25:19.608+00:00Pop Culture - Rapid Unscheduled Disassembly Required<p><i>There are the usual spoilers or avoidance of them...</i></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Across the Spider-Arse</span></i></b></p><p>The first question I have to ask is - and it will seem a bit strange given my own cynicism towards the writer - has Alan Moore considered suing Sony, Marvel and the writers of <b>Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse</b>? Having finally gotten around to watching the film - in two parts, because the wife declared she'd been asleep for most of the opening 45 minutes, so I switched it off and decided to watch the rest of it while she was decorating the kitchen - all I could think of was <i>Captain Britain - The Jasper's Warp</i>. It's literally a huge rip off of that comic; or at least the filling in a sandwich was.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhqSL431Sx-g_5xC_1ItleFpYruDien8N6f7oV6is43Emgbd9kmgqg2SUdM36v_kwMA-hLYzENP-mGCR8BjZr2dhANbpKz8NK97Wg2nIAG-yvqkQ75xEqTI3Rx5AjPgoJsTVT6zHXsEW9ABjjCtyg7qQXsWacYEIViL0c61Ih3mfbZVpar_vGCFXQgJ6oT3" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="248" data-original-width="474" height="167" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhqSL431Sx-g_5xC_1ItleFpYruDien8N6f7oV6is43Emgbd9kmgqg2SUdM36v_kwMA-hLYzENP-mGCR8BjZr2dhANbpKz8NK97Wg2nIAG-yvqkQ75xEqTI3Rx5AjPgoJsTVT6zHXsEW9ABjjCtyg7qQXsWacYEIViL0c61Ih3mfbZVpar_vGCFXQgJ6oT3" width="320" /></a></div>That aside, this is the best Marvel film I've seen in a while - maybe not as good as Guardians 3, but better than the live action Spider-Man films in the MCU. That isn't to say that I got it; it's been a long time since we watched the first film and I probably would have enjoyed this even more had I not been clueless to some of the references. There's also about 45 minutes of this film that feels like padding; the opening 25 minutes was a bit like an extended 'while you were away' recap with added, 'oh you should know this if you want to enjoy it better' and the 'end' couldn't have been more drawn out if they'd slowed the movie down by 50%. These elements aside, it's a rollicking good film, with some stunning animation - albeit a bit on the schizophrenic side at times - and the [comics reference coming up] Bill Sienkiewicz style of artwork, in places, really works, especially when it's used to its freakiest best. In fact the homages littered throughout this film tells me that while Sony make lousy - truly lousy - Marvel films, they make Spider-Man multiverse films better than anyone else by a country mile - there appears to be a genuine love for the character on display and more importantly his history. In fact, there are so many ideas here - including ripping off Captain Britain - it's going to make the MCU solution for their own multiverse problem a massive mountain to climb, because if they could use this scenario then they might pull it off, but you know they won't. Plus, The Spot is a really interesting and original villain, something else that has been missing from MCU films for a while now.<br /><p></p><p>There were things about the movie that as a 61 year old man who has been away from comics for nearly a quarter of century I just didn't get. For starters, Spider-Man is Peter Parker, he isn't Miles Morales or Miguel O'Hara or a cartoon pig and however likeable Miles might be, this Ultimate Spider-Man incarnation passed me by 20 odd years ago and I'm not going to be drawn into it. I referenced the Guardian of the Galaxy in the opening paragraph - they are not my Guardians, my biggest problem with the first two Guardians films was the fact I was having imitations shovelled down my throat. Yes, maybe the original Guardians might not have made a decent movie, but it took me two films and umpteen guest appearances for me to finally accept them as Marvel characters in a team. This 'Spider-Man' is just a reboot that is now almost 25 years old; although that's 16 years older than the original Spider-Man was when I properly discovered him, so he's not exactly 'new' any more. </p><p>The clever, fast-paced, little story that plays out in this does go a long way to make me accept Miles as <b style="font-style: italic;"><u>a</u> </b>Spider-Man mainly because he was never meant to be a Spider-Man. If it's been five years since you saw <b>Into the Spider-Verse</b> then I'd have a recap before delving into this, but as probably everyone who reads this blog will have seen this movie already that probably doesn't even matter. I'm glad I got around to seeing it, I just feel the wife has missed out, even if this is just the first part of the story. </p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">In Distress</span></i></b></p><p>The biggest problem with Netflix's latest fantasy movie <b>Damsel </b>is the lead actor; a person who, it seems, has become something of a Marmite girl since her breakout role in <b>Stranger Things</b>. Millie Bobby Brown wields a lot of power in Hollywood, apparently, and she has valuable contracts that allows her to have a free rein on the films she wants to make. As a result, even when she makes something that isn't bad it tends to get poor ratings; she really isn't to everyone's tastes.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEikHfZlpUWNtMQIZTouvanPx8ssX_9YFEp29tLv3I06QHS5o_v4x7kZ9syl6uWG0Ru6RU9FAqoK4Nvc-pfzqnWHUTBd8t67ZetNBKA5PRLN_PR-bqXV1DKsP9szg522Cfvnq67watKzYVO5kAY48iF7WTamFiEt9Dvk0pQ5-gVhVlaUPsiz7diLaO_Wh076" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="263" data-original-width="474" height="178" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEikHfZlpUWNtMQIZTouvanPx8ssX_9YFEp29tLv3I06QHS5o_v4x7kZ9syl6uWG0Ru6RU9FAqoK4Nvc-pfzqnWHUTBd8t67ZetNBKA5PRLN_PR-bqXV1DKsP9szg522Cfvnq67watKzYVO5kAY48iF7WTamFiEt9Dvk0pQ5-gVhVlaUPsiz7diLaO_Wh076" width="320" /></a></div>In her latest offering, she plays the princess of a poor nation struggling through a harsh winter who has the chance to marry the prince of a faraway island kingdom and bring prosperity to her lands once again; the problem is it's all a bit too good to be true. So when her father sells her off for what is essentially more gold than he'll ever need, it soon becomes obvious that she's got herself into a situation that won't have her living happily ever after. It takes a while to get to this point; the film does a good job of painting the new kingdom she's marrying into as a warm and friendly place - initially - but we soon see it is riddled with snobbery and contempt, especially for 'lesser' people. When her father - Ray Winstone - loses his jolly 'father-of-the-bride exterior and her stepmother - Angela Bassett - suddenly starts worrying about Elodie it becomes obvious we're not in Fairy Tale Land. What follows is a little bit creepy and yet probably very expected - otherwise there wouldn't be much of a film.<p></p><p>Suffice it to say there's an ancient dragon involved and she has a deal with the royal family of Orea which involves... a certain sacrifice here and there. The thing is Elodie - Brown - has already been established as pretty good at handling herself so when the dragon meets more than she expects we get into the realms of the unexpected. This is a movie that doesn't deserve its 6.2 rating, but you read the reviews on film sites and you'll see what the problem is almost immediately; it's Ms Brown, who is now 20 and has gone from pre-pubescent child star to a young woman who wants you to... well... look at her fantastic body and not her acting range. <b>Damsel</b> isn't a bad film; I don't really have a problem with Brown, despite the fact she clearly loves herself, as she is a bit of a fan of fantasy genres and seems to be trying to make films that are fun with a dash of sci-fi or fantasy about them. Her main problem is she's not a very good actor and while she might be worth a shit load of money, I can't see any Oscar roles in her future. She might not want that, but my guess is she does.<br /></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">...But Not As We Know It</span></i></b></p><p>The Jake Gyllenhaal, Rebecca Ferguson and Ryan Reynolds sci-fi vehicle <b>Life</b> is essentially a post-modern take on <b>Alien</b>. A kind of 'what if Alien took place in the 21st century on board the ISS orbiting earth?' It does a good job and probably bombed at the box office because it has bleak ending. Oops, I gave that away, but the film is 7 years old and has been on TV three times in the last four months.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiI5UfTQfy6ASSEOhzECQWN8Dt_zrxGhjgdjkoJOqg7nAx7dLLDN9j00rhRQ18zcVo7EX_l0OYju4vgBtkHKqSJk_m-L336cHpsDKfSTK7c-6Ixt8yC86n1GTESAoXLTv1pI9_6WbLQJ6-JhAF8WgP_wzBOqtvks19hZjzHrIDT03o-8yt6MoZqB67bLJ0M" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="381" data-original-width="678" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiI5UfTQfy6ASSEOhzECQWN8Dt_zrxGhjgdjkoJOqg7nAx7dLLDN9j00rhRQ18zcVo7EX_l0OYju4vgBtkHKqSJk_m-L336cHpsDKfSTK7c-6Ixt8yC86n1GTESAoXLTv1pI9_6WbLQJ6-JhAF8WgP_wzBOqtvks19hZjzHrIDT03o-8yt6MoZqB67bLJ0M" width="320" /></a></div>It's a thriller about some soil samples collected on Mars which are going to be examined on the space station and it soon becomes clear that these samples contain life - the first not from earth - and this is a big deal. The problem is this life is very dangerous, highly intelligent and as it starts to pick off the six crew members, the future starts to look very bleak for mankind - this organism must not be allowed to reach earth. The first to die is Reynolds, which, when we watched it the first time around, was quite shocking because he was quite a big star by 2017. From that point on it was about stopping it, but the Martian has one thing going for it - the haphazardness of human beings. It's a taut movie that rocks along without ever reaching the heights that <b>Alien </b>did. It's currently doing the rounds on ITV4 and Film4 so if you keep an eye on the schedules it'll probably pop up soon enough.<p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Playing Catch-Up</span></i></b></p><p>Since we got the Smart TV (which is a misnomer as far as I'm concerned as it doesn't appear to be very smart), we have access to the free streaming services and therefore do not use the set top box to record TV programmes very often; the box is basically used to record films and anything that we want to watch that's on a commercial channel because we can fast forward through the adverts - watch something like ITVX or All4 and you have to put up with adverts you can't fast forward through.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhQnUPTCyQBMxD4dkTRcVq9o713R3tPIgkhXkMZVHl1TSPuFnNz-wldUkDb1uC2clU2QXcS9mF-bwGefBl_59I-kWAHHQc4xy-yTtUyywymq8nEd1h1Pbn7aUXqR-aro-D8v-mPfdetpSOOg_s3PT2akp2irLaTTQ5KYa1nAZf4PnzeybjlD8i3R3yrKHOJ" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="1062" data-original-width="1888" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhQnUPTCyQBMxD4dkTRcVq9o713R3tPIgkhXkMZVHl1TSPuFnNz-wldUkDb1uC2clU2QXcS9mF-bwGefBl_59I-kWAHHQc4xy-yTtUyywymq8nEd1h1Pbn7aUXqR-aro-D8v-mPfdetpSOOg_s3PT2akp2irLaTTQ5KYa1nAZf4PnzeybjlD8i3R3yrKHOJ" width="320" /></a></div>The reason I'm telling you this is because the wife was recording something off of ITV (which means we can't access the Flash Drive of Doom) so we watched something off iPlayer we saved at Christmas - <b>Lot No.249 </b>- A Christmas Ghost Story adapted by Mark Gatiss from the Arthur Conan Doyle short story. It starred Kit Harrington and (the awful) Freddy Fox and wasn't particularly Christmassy, which is a good thing for a cold March night, nor was it scary in the slightest. It did introduce a proto-Sherlock Holmes, for what good he was, and the 30 minute story was basically a waste of time and money. There was nothing remotely good about it; it was superficial, had a very weak plot with zero motive and left me wondering if this was the adaptation that made a hash of the story or it was simply a shit story. I can only deduce that Gatiss fucked up because Conan Doyle did, I recall, have a quite successful writing career.<br /><p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">McConaughey Rules</span></i></b></p><p>I commented a few months ago that I can't recall us ever watching anything with Matthew McConaughey in that we didn't enjoy. This is not a challenge; we are not watching his films hoping to be let down. we're just happy that we're batting a solid 100% average with the actor and we watched another of his films that we knew little of and we walked away with that 100% still intact.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiMmp-ecv2nVoMgml2vyeYPd-GWIivNEAgj2o2k21vvxfxtegRZPyd3EN04aPvPCXV259ieQ0YsgCJJN7-kJh-TIX9INGCE7nvpOvPvElHzxEFrcOZShJZvcaSrvCHKGCD7s0QfuU1m89fJPphRFUe5uDo_GFSZjp8bHi1y56eTeQZ88PRFb25CmFjPXvmu" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="1024" data-original-width="1536" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiMmp-ecv2nVoMgml2vyeYPd-GWIivNEAgj2o2k21vvxfxtegRZPyd3EN04aPvPCXV259ieQ0YsgCJJN7-kJh-TIX9INGCE7nvpOvPvElHzxEFrcOZShJZvcaSrvCHKGCD7s0QfuU1m89fJPphRFUe5uDo_GFSZjp8bHi1y56eTeQZ88PRFb25CmFjPXvmu" width="320" /></a></div><b>The Lincoln Lawyer</b> is about defence attorney Micky Haller, who operates out of the back of his Lincoln Continental and has a reputation for a) taking on scumbags no one else wants and b) being very, very successful. Haller isn't a Saul Goodman, he's a genuinely good lawyer who is driven by money and is the ex-partner of one of the LA District Attorneys (played by Marissa Tomei). He's entrenched in the law and while he's unorthodox, he's reasonably well respected. This is a movie with an all-star cast - William H Macy, Bryan Cranston, Ryan Phillippe, John Leguizamo, Frances Fisher, Michael Pena, Bob Gunton and Shea Wigham are just some of the excellent actors involved in this project. Haller is given the job of defending the son of a realtor who is accused of sexual assault; there's a lot of money to be made from this and everything seems to be going as planned when some discrepancies start to appear in his client's story. <p></p><p>When it starts to become obvious to Haller that his client might be guilty, he realises that the man might also be the killer of a woman one of his former clients is in San Quentin serving life for; the problem is the further Haller digs the worse it starts to become for him as his client might be a psychopath, but he's also very clever and appears to be one step ahead of the lawyer all the time. This is a great film and what makes it especially good is that you know everything by about the hour mark yet it still remains a tight thriller where you don't know what is going to happen next. It's been on Film4 recently, which means it'll be on again in the not too distant future - you should check it out; it's a quality film.</p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Prelude to War</span></i></b></p><p>The second of the rebooted <b>Planet of the Apes </b>films is in many ways a better film than the first, not because it fleshes out the apes more, but because the special effects were better and it focuses on one specific story. Obviously the success of <b>Rise</b> led Matt Reeves to have a bigger budget for the second part <b>Dawn</b> (although I think that Dawn would have been a better title for the first part and Rise a better one for the second - but what do I know?). That said, I've always thought Cesar never looked like a proper chimp whereas the other chimps all look like apes, if you catch my meaning?</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEg2WPqb4DvNaGIZjTp2Gb4K9Q4EN_L0hyTm8tue3dKTGBfEDvgxhOS1un-AbBzd-l6FpDf9OqPTmNP0iVctPppThbkc9CuBb1WuAZNl13gvEpQ-1ebP23IajkAAmy3icmFTCBSQ1DqUy3Bzi1ORZ6jRlOVw372T9BwnCj3e0goSZM-Wqv_bKhV5SNAUzyhg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="1080" data-original-width="1920" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEg2WPqb4DvNaGIZjTp2Gb4K9Q4EN_L0hyTm8tue3dKTGBfEDvgxhOS1un-AbBzd-l6FpDf9OqPTmNP0iVctPppThbkc9CuBb1WuAZNl13gvEpQ-1ebP23IajkAAmy3icmFTCBSQ1DqUy3Bzi1ORZ6jRlOVw372T9BwnCj3e0goSZM-Wqv_bKhV5SNAUzyhg" width="320" /></a></div><b>Dawn</b> is set 10 years after the first film and it appears that about 90% of the human population of the planet has been wiped out and in a little corner of northern San Francisco, where it always seems to rain, the apes colony is thriving and for 10 years they have enjoyed life and for two of those years they've been free of human interaction, which is what they like the best. Unfortunately for everyone some humans turn up and immediately fuck things over by shooting one of the apes - not the best way to start when you realise that a kingdom of apes lives between you and your easiest way of restoring power to parts of the dead city you live in. These humans want to restore a hydro-electric dam but need to travel through ape country to get to it...<p></p><p>From this point on it's all about trust and while Cesar tries to do the correct thing, Koba - his right hand chimp - grows to despise his boss's way of thinking. The problem is the guy wanting to make things right between mankind and apes is the right hand man of someone who is all for starting a war against what he sees as a primitive species and obviously the looneys on both sides have enough followers to ensure that when the shit hits the fans it spreads far and wide. What seems to be a terrible waste here are some of the subplots, which given time to develop might have made a good movie in their own right, but became almost pointless little segments in the grand context - such as Cody Smit-McPhee's relationship with Maurice, the orangutan. <br /></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">A Modern Day Spaced?</span></i></b></p><p>I said last week that <b>Extraordinary</b> reminded me of <b>Spaced</b> and while we were concluding the series the wife said, "This reminds me of <b>Spaced</b>." And she doesn't read my blogs... There is nothing about this that is remotely like <b>Spaced</b> but the vibe is there; that feeling that you're watching it through a fever dream inside one of the character's brains.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEihV9uO37bSe798Uq0zB3fOOv1LybnRIm_TaUDboY8McvqbcqIvNTHYM67wJiVYj8HFRcoOaEqYM9DDWEKI5m70m_uvm4cqRb5dPLoV87YAHgI-zG_BWuaYhLtzn9N4R-ZRC1Gu9Lg6xfsZZieLFCrnMdJ7UlRr2eA8Y-GN2pM2fTkBCo2tpLKB8IkpNQJi" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="237" data-original-width="400" height="190" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEihV9uO37bSe798Uq0zB3fOOv1LybnRIm_TaUDboY8McvqbcqIvNTHYM67wJiVYj8HFRcoOaEqYM9DDWEKI5m70m_uvm4cqRb5dPLoV87YAHgI-zG_BWuaYhLtzn9N4R-ZRC1Gu9Lg6xfsZZieLFCrnMdJ7UlRr2eA8Y-GN2pM2fTkBCo2tpLKB8IkpNQJi" width="320" /></a></div>It was clear from the start that Jen and Rob aka Jizz Lord's relationship would be the main thing in this series even if Jen's missing powers is the main plot that intrudes as often as possible. Carrie's indecisiveness and Kash's being an imbecile will always be guaranteed laugh makers, but it takes some slightly unexpected turns towards the end of the series. Jen's Powers Therapist (Julian Barrett) has more than just a key role to play in things and as she edges closer to finding out why she's powerless. There is a quality threshold that it sometimes fails to meet and sometimes the sets are remarkable (and expensive - like the trailer full of dildos) and other times the special effects are rubbish (like that's done on purpose), but for all the things you struggle with, there's an honesty and sense of fun permeating it all the time. It's silly and quite modern, but the wife made an observation; there's something a bit eighties about it at times and all the characters dress like they're trainee clowns. It also has a really poignant conclusion as well as a very interesting looking cliffhanger for season three.<div><div><p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Dreamer, Nothing But a Dreamer</span></i></b></p><p>Peter Dinklage doesn't make 'normal' films. I suppose if you're a vertically challenged man who has an uncanny knack for being an excellent actor then you're going to make unconventional films and his 2022 movie <b>American Dreamer</b> certainly doesn't fit into any category I can think of apart from gentle quirky comedy.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhdB8gI-PPnXvaj_joG1nLS4SeILOLUDTB9iABlogoVPpCW2Tb6spVC2ztgdcW_rZl08l9oe1-9iMlGEvTOqa7rO1HN2by1tPjk8FvS0T4CK719UFmRfbUZVsulc_t6TSZGvhng9MXqNzf-RdaDfomJzCUVLo7n3cnANBfuZ6HPFFncT_Pnrbjm4gWB0uVD" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="266" data-original-width="474" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhdB8gI-PPnXvaj_joG1nLS4SeILOLUDTB9iABlogoVPpCW2Tb6spVC2ztgdcW_rZl08l9oe1-9iMlGEvTOqa7rO1HN2by1tPjk8FvS0T4CK719UFmRfbUZVsulc_t6TSZGvhng9MXqNzf-RdaDfomJzCUVLo7n3cnANBfuZ6HPFFncT_Pnrbjm4gWB0uVD" width="320" /></a></div>Dinklage stars as a college professor with more failures behind him than success, while Shirley MacLaine (she's nearly 90, you know) and Matt Dillon co-star. Dinklage's life has been, for better or worse, a series of unfulfilled dreams and now he's lecturing on Cultural Economics and obviously not liking it very much. He is looking for a property to buy, to get him on the ladder, but every house he's signed up to look at is far too expensive for him - he has about $200,000 to spend and the cheapest houses he looks at are always over $1million. He has an imaginary ex-wife and he's miserably delusional, he also wants to be the next great American novelist but doesn't appear to be able to actually write a book. Then one day he sees an advert in the classified for a house that is for sale at $5million or $240,000 if the owner can remain in it until she dies. Dinklage cashes in everything he's got to raise the money, he signs the papers and moves into an annex to the main house - a gorgeous sprawling mansion, on the beach, in New England and that's when he meets MacLaine and that's when the film gets a little weird. </div><div><div><div><p>What starts out frosty becomes a good friendship, but there seems to be something not quite right; it appears that MacLaine, instead of being a childless widow actually has loads of children and one of them is a lawyer who tells Dinklage that he hasn't got a hope in hell of keeping the house when the old woman dies and everything seems to be on the verge of falling apart for him; that's when things start to get very odd indeed and you need to see it to fully understand the twists and turns that are going to both screw with our protagonist and also work out in his favour. What I seriously cannot understand about this film is it was delayed in its release for two years (this wouldn't be the first Dinklage vehicle this has happened to) and the day after its release it was sitting at 8.0 on IMDB - that was enough for me - however, when I was looking at IMDB during the writing of this review I noticed it was now down to 5.7 and I thought it was one of the better films I've seen this year and just confirms that IMDB ratings seem to very inaccurate nowadays - however, the biggest complaints seem to be the lack of 'dreaming', which simply explains to me the lack of intelligence of some of the reviewers and why some of them need post-it notes with Arse and Elbow written on them. </p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">The Great Esc-Apes</span></i></b></p><p>We concluded the POTA reboot with the third and final film in Matt Reeves' trilogy - <b>War for the Planet of the Apes</b>, set a couple of years after <b>Dawn</b>, is essentially a remake of The Great Escape with a little bit of Apocalypse Now thrown in for good measure. </p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEja9siBzTxX_j1DVfiVnyiTMFFbl5EmocDpzQrGZO1gCo-l988kMqNicrpE9fa2F1kSxwef6WpjQi2cIEvOcFZXhcPklB3e0pw5B--iWAcAZK1h4zucab4nMOS_ef6_a9GjTZtx3H68RUeKiJpeaDbxSoO0M7RqyMY95J0YB6z-t1L7vTnXJgLFtFUCuRU7" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="790" data-original-width="1185" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEja9siBzTxX_j1DVfiVnyiTMFFbl5EmocDpzQrGZO1gCo-l988kMqNicrpE9fa2F1kSxwef6WpjQi2cIEvOcFZXhcPklB3e0pw5B--iWAcAZK1h4zucab4nMOS_ef6_a9GjTZtx3H68RUeKiJpeaDbxSoO0M7RqyMY95J0YB6z-t1L7vTnXJgLFtFUCuRU7" width="320" /></a></div>The thing that's most telling about this movie is how tragic it is. It is by far and away the saddest of the three and all the films have sadness running through them in some form or other. I think the underlying theme for the entire trilogy has been just how fucking awful humans can and are and this is the pinnacle in many ways with Woody Harrelson's The Colonel demonstrating how supremacy will be man's ultimate downfall. The intriguing thing about this film is how it actually sets up <b>The Planet of the Apes</b> - this rebooted franchise does something you don't often see, it takes an idea and does it much better. There was always this feeling in the original Charlton Heston POTA movie that mankind had caused its downfall by some nuclear war and not through a man made virus. With this film, we begin to understand that once it - the virus - had wiped out most of humanity, it mutated and came back in a variant form 15 years later to strip humans of their humanity and intelligence - as the apes grew cleverer man became the savage.<p></p><p>In many ways, the War depicted in this was never about the apes; they were caught in the middle of a war between two factions of humanity - the intolerant and the not so intolerant. It is, in many ways, the best of the trio of movies, but it's also the one with the least hope. I'm surprised it was such a hit at the box office because it doesn't really have a happy ending, as such. It does however set things up for the next trilogy beginning with <b>Kingdom</b> in the summer - this is a new film that will be much more like the original 1968 sci-fi classic. It made me think about watching Tim Burton's 2001 reboot, but I watched some clips on IMDB and saw it has a rating of 5.7, which in this instance I'll treat as a recommendation rather than a false rating.<br /></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Please Make It Stop</span></i></b></p><p>Stupid. It's the only word I have. Stupid. This is what <b>Resident Alien</b> has been reduced to. A pile of unfunny, uninspiring horse shit that has dispensed a story in favour of ludicrous antics and stupidity. It's truly an insult to everyone's intelligence.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgWlUuq49OxLtEqfFT9E2RGSIW8jiAdS5KVgGBHFW4r1dKMUELDe7N4cxceQvhho7xD_eeBVtdLR_wrs4S-2Pl72TLoyc4oRNinsO-Qmdf1vNeUIAwbBQHPZ_ZkYbg_ybTG0eg3sMhIicqrYT8DBts3cReeL13ttSSBOUbrP1yMpooADd1YxwIXJgvVlnc9" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="394" data-original-width="590" height="214" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgWlUuq49OxLtEqfFT9E2RGSIW8jiAdS5KVgGBHFW4r1dKMUELDe7N4cxceQvhho7xD_eeBVtdLR_wrs4S-2Pl72TLoyc4oRNinsO-Qmdf1vNeUIAwbBQHPZ_ZkYbg_ybTG0eg3sMhIicqrYT8DBts3cReeL13ttSSBOUbrP1yMpooADd1YxwIXJgvVlnc9" width="320" /></a></div>It's difficult to even try and explain to you what is going on now. Harry has fallen in love with an Avian alien and all they're doing is shagging wherever and whenever they can. He's also insulting his friends and is no longer that fussed about saving the planet. D'Arcy makes an intervention to the mayor about his alien abductions, while his wife is even more convinced she's been abducted and had a child stolen from her. Sheriff Mike has an encounter with the hot female detective he dumped and other stuff happened and we didn't give a flying shit about any of it. The problem is we're invested in this turkey of a TV show and with an alleged three episodes left it feels like we need to continue subjecting our eyes and brain to this horror show for a resolution that isn't going to be fulfilling. The wrinkle in all of this is that SyFy has not confirmed or denied if there'll be a season 4, despite the first episode of season 3 being watched by only 285,000 people - according to figures I saw on the internet, which might not be true but have a ring of absolute truth about them. What is tragic about this is how it started off, it genuinely felt like a good idea and was executed well, but it quickly wandered away from what made it interesting and focused on too many characters - the makers made it an ensemble piece when it was fine as an Alan Tudyk vehicle with supporting characters. What is worse is that SyFy has cancelled some great shows over the last decade, shows that have been excellent and they replaced them with dollops of stinky shit that do not warrant anything but derision and scorn. People get paid to produce excrement like this and that is unbelievable. <p></p><p><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b><i>Madame Wank and More Underpants</i></b> </span></p><p>What a fucking awful way to end the week. I'm beginning to think that I'm either drawn to torturing myself or the quality of anything that reaches my Smart TV is so low it's on antidepressants. Friday night in the Hall house should be a great movie night or maybe a binge of brilliant TV, instead it was a very nice rice pudding and two of the most atrocious loads of vomit ever made...</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgh23RzVO6FhPBXe4uH9a7FnivmGqMQ66szSSmD-Xicx84Nd1CnhHXKSbrg5KUNTy0CbeF4HA0n-rq0CXdm-aedAXH6EaeZRzP3QPLVi3VE79Cz1t0X1vX96m3FOZSJBspv8-98AF104c03WvJZF0ke8Yd1KUXSP053D1qK0sDeAFgQtaChvPPHQqaMYShQ" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="632" data-original-width="1200" height="169" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgh23RzVO6FhPBXe4uH9a7FnivmGqMQ66szSSmD-Xicx84Nd1CnhHXKSbrg5KUNTy0CbeF4HA0n-rq0CXdm-aedAXH6EaeZRzP3QPLVi3VE79Cz1t0X1vX96m3FOZSJBspv8-98AF104c03WvJZF0ke8Yd1KUXSP053D1qK0sDeAFgQtaChvPPHQqaMYShQ" width="320" /></a></div>I wasn't going to watch this. I thought, 'It won't be as bad as everyone says it is but I'm not going to take the chance. I won't watch it!' So I downloaded it and we watched it. Well, when I say we watched it, I mean I switched it off at the 30 minute mark. I'd given it ten more minutes than it deserved but I felt I needed to watch enough of it to be able to say why I switched off. I switched off because this was a movie with almost no redeeming features at all. It was badly acted, badly scripted and even by the 30 minute mark, Dakota Johnson's medic character seemed only able to administer CPR to all and any problem. "IBS? CPR!" "Sprained wrist? CPR!" "Headache? CPR!" "Inability to get an erection? CPR!" Then there was the acting, or in the case of the guy who stole the spider from Dakota's mother, his lack of acting ability and the fact that most of his lines were delivered with his mouth off camera, because it had obviously been dubbed with new words because, heaven forbid, the original words he spoke were obviously so much worse than the new ones.<p></p><p>We never got to the part where Dakota recruits the Spider-Gals and they battle the black spider; but we did meet Peter Parker's mother and his uncle Ben and Dakota's inability to interact with other human beings or the CPR she did... 3.7 on IMDB? That high?</p><p>So, because I chose to watch <b>Madame Web</b> (in case you were wondering what I was going on about), the wife, by default, got to choose the film we watched in its place. There might be less on the Flash Drive of Doom now, but I'd replenished it with seasons 2 and 3 of <b>Fargo</b> (because we need to catch up with that), there's <b>Constellation</b> and <b>Silo</b> to watch or at least give a chance to, but no, she decided that we should watch one of the two <b>Underworld</b> movies we hadn't watched, despite having lived through the first three and realising just how fucking awful they all were and that <b>Awakening</b> (or perhaps it should have been called Awankening) had a considerably lower rating than any of the previous three...</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjMxyCjJ6518U1lDTc30Fqpnv1Dy9YZygczTtprH8kClW21XuYlWwoz4wzvQ_4S_-LZswzb-_rNI8OBXvX0NcVjiRTP-LZPnSyAEW-MkL2hhqGiReOoGDpcg58A2VG73yZ0_Qz-BDlJCIf_bi8B1oVwp8Gx_g7f2L5zWrnvVuSIyjWrXE4uG6K3o527jkvS" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="1500" data-original-width="1001" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjMxyCjJ6518U1lDTc30Fqpnv1Dy9YZygczTtprH8kClW21XuYlWwoz4wzvQ_4S_-LZswzb-_rNI8OBXvX0NcVjiRTP-LZPnSyAEW-MkL2hhqGiReOoGDpcg58A2VG73yZ0_Qz-BDlJCIf_bi8B1oVwp8Gx_g7f2L5zWrnvVuSIyjWrXE4uG6K3o527jkvS" width="160" /></a></div>This was 88 (actually closer to 78) minutes of my life that I'm never going to see again and a grand total of 108 minutes of my Friday night obliterated by excrement - I might have had more fun sitting in a bath of shit. This 'movie' about Kate Beckinsale's vampire and the 'child' she managed to have - but didn't know it - with her hybrid boyfriend who wasn't in the film so they CGI'd his face onto someone else for the fun of it was literally as bad as Madame Fucking Web except it had no pretence at all; it knew it was shit, the special effects were like a cross between an Atari ST and Ray Harryhausen and the story was so poor that I'm fairly sure a child with brain death would have come up with something better. This was abysmal; it was the kind of film where you wonder why someone like Charles Dance would even have considered being in it despite someone waving a big fat cheque in his face. I mean, I can understand why Beckinsale did it; she's getting on; her tits are probably dangling round her knees; she hadn't had a decent role for a few years and the <b>Total Recall</b> remake flopped badly; she probably thought she could buy a new house or get a boob lift with the cash. Did she think 'Should I really be making this?' at any point? Was she not visited from the grave by her brilliant father who whispered in her ear that maybe prostitution was a more honourable and honest occupation to pursue? The wife wants to watch <b>Underpants: Blood Wars</b>, she can fucking watch it on her own...<br /><p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Next Time...</span></i></b></p><p>Who gives a fuck? Why should I torment myself and you with promises of what might be when I finished the week watching mainly shit films and TV I wouldn't usually give houseroom to? There were some good films - in a week where we seemed to watch so many films - and so little TV. Speaking of which, TV had better get better soon or I'm giving up on it - <b>3 Body Problem</b> is out next week, I'm desperately hoping its the quality we're lacking, but you can never be sure, especially now. We're told by so many that 2024 could be the best year ever for TV and I'm beginning to think this is a marketing line from an increasingly desperate executive who wants to keep his job... </p><p>Films? I might run out of old films to watch soon enough and that will be terrible because very few recent films have been worth wasting my time on. It seems every time I watch a new film I want it to be excellent but it turns into a pile of dehydrated shit. I might as well have five wanks a week.</p><p><br /><br /></p></div></div></div></div>Phil Hallhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12680058800847509275noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5979663737404474935.post-58553171658322410202024-03-14T15:55:00.002+00:002024-03-15T11:37:19.129+00:00Ode to a Dying Genre (Part One)<p>Fantasy is the new superhero film. If you need to have a genre favourite in cinema then fantasy films are the new it. Whether that's science fantasy, medieval fantasy, monstrous fantasy, surrealist fantasy or just elements of fantasy in 'normal' movies, it does seem to be the way some films are going and they're going in this direction and leaving 'superhero fantasy' in their wake. No one, it seems, wants superheroes any more and to be fair to the people, it isn't their fault. That falls squarely at the feet of the companies grinding out the shit cluttering up cinemas and streaming platforms. </p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjTLcpc3NZDyl302wzCOA3FdbWaoA0i7tYZCmYDj8YB8Ow5FK1j_KO_x_jc9rOH5HX_zFVlcmmhin3xnY9C9et7Q45Py91HaIa87drZPvnDkmtLKWe832XlVG0DAsnzUNghJDWZeA4QEqFAnm3gyr3RBxOwe7iwox1gE2xK4Zx0ApiSmwdHFpqWkdB3XkSO" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="1080" data-original-width="1920" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjTLcpc3NZDyl302wzCOA3FdbWaoA0i7tYZCmYDj8YB8Ow5FK1j_KO_x_jc9rOH5HX_zFVlcmmhin3xnY9C9et7Q45Py91HaIa87drZPvnDkmtLKWe832XlVG0DAsnzUNghJDWZeA4QEqFAnm3gyr3RBxOwe7iwox1gE2xK4Zx0ApiSmwdHFpqWkdB3XkSO" width="320" /></a></div>The irony is that the last film from DC - <b>Aquaman and the Lost Kingdom</b> - was so bad it was like they were shooting themselves in the foot. There's hype surrounding James Gunn's new DC superhero universe and much of it is tentatively positive - he does have good form - so DC releases the final 'old school' film and it is execrable and arguably one of the worst superhero films ever to grace the big screen. Why is that? Why would they do that? More importantly, the <b>Batgirl</b> film that Warner's pulled completely must have been so bad, because if they felt <b>Aquaman 2</b> was worth a release... Actually, I can answer this quite confidently - <b>Aquaman</b> was a success at the box office (remarkably) so they figured as it had form then the sequel would probably be far more lucrative than a Batman spin-off they weren't enamoured with. From a layman's perspective, Batman films usually fill the Warner Bros coffers, even if <b>Batgirl</b> had been made with marionettes and retired actors from the Troma dynasty of films, it would probably have made <i>some</i> money. The thing is confidence isn't high at Warner Brothers, even with a reboot on the horizon.<p></p><p>You would think Warner Bros would want to give Gunn's new look universe some help. The next Superman film and the first in the new look is scheduled for 2025, that's only just over a year since Aquawank came out, it's not like people are going to have forgotten about it and audiences are not known for their bad memories or their forgiveness. Giving superheroes a year off isn't going to whet appetites; 10 years maybe, but a year isn't enough...</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjzgaNhpjAaidkwE4jvlVwE3txD57isyav-WoEcEZG7k_ctckvFYIehL-VuwMmodsJB65I-sTZxvVXPkOJXZ2MD2C2liWe-1iIPSZBDtQ5jg5FWl9F0sWjRkOCh-1cNiJMtVg8dvNAuWOTFWrdZjJ4DKNuFvjdKdvlcMzgRfkr85QoPT8vCNx4w0e1qCHtv" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="1350" data-original-width="2500" height="173" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjzgaNhpjAaidkwE4jvlVwE3txD57isyav-WoEcEZG7k_ctckvFYIehL-VuwMmodsJB65I-sTZxvVXPkOJXZ2MD2C2liWe-1iIPSZBDtQ5jg5FWl9F0sWjRkOCh-1cNiJMtVg8dvNAuWOTFWrdZjJ4DKNuFvjdKdvlcMzgRfkr85QoPT8vCNx4w0e1qCHtv" width="320" /></a></div>However, as woeful as the Aquaman sequel was, it wasn't even in the same league of shite as <b>Madame Web</b> which currently sits at 3.7 on IMDB, which is almost as low as <b>Sharknado</b> (3.3). I mean Dakota Johnson has form for being in shit films - the 50 Shades franchise - but this is taking it to a whole new level of piss poor. I can't tell you how bad <b>Madame Web</b> is because I haven't soiled my eyes watching it, yet will probably when it becomes available to stream - just so I can tell you all how bad it is. This is a nadir in Sony's woeful attempts at creating a Spider-Man universe where Spider-Man doesn't exist - an idea that makes no sense at all. Yet, here we are and with the delayed and delayed <b>Kraven the Hunter</b> about to finally show up in August we're probably witnessing the death throes of Sony's Spider-Verse as a live action universe. This film, originally scheduled for autumn 2023, has, like <b>Madame Web</b>, undergone extensive rewrites and reshoots - probably by AI - to try and kickstart a franchise that should never have gone further than <b>Venom</b> and that's me being generous.<p></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjlIXfcjj_6aFIJRP-msgxxvIVug3OowWaeINS68-J_e7efMLNdWI06gjrZFyazzfYk5uvc8JbMxIZbPN9e38rr5qZSRb8cA96oYR9Q1JOInYMuSa2uos9liHQLzhKUmYXQ3FHStx7dZtG7U7yqH1M0GhZzJTCPVTUSQJvsVlWG-6ro1zKJq0C0FtGoJEcl" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="1080" data-original-width="1716" height="201" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjlIXfcjj_6aFIJRP-msgxxvIVug3OowWaeINS68-J_e7efMLNdWI06gjrZFyazzfYk5uvc8JbMxIZbPN9e38rr5qZSRb8cA96oYR9Q1JOInYMuSa2uos9liHQLzhKUmYXQ3FHStx7dZtG7U7yqH1M0GhZzJTCPVTUSQJvsVlWG-6ro1zKJq0C0FtGoJEcl" width="320" /></a></div>The thing is there might be salvation on the horizon. With Marvel/Disney in turmoil over their future, Sony has been toying with the idea of bringing back Tobey Maguire or Andrew Garfield or even both of them. There is nothing in the deal between the MCU and Sony that states Sony can't make Spider-Man films, they just have problems with Tom Holland - he is MCU Spidey and I won't even try to explain the legal side of this because when I read about it, the entire thing made my straight hair curly. Simplistically, Tom Holland's Spidey exists in the MCU he cannot exist in Sony's Spider-Verse; that doesn't mean there can't be a Spider-Man, but it has to be an extant Spider-Man not a new one. Plus Sony doesn't want to do another origin film, so the avenues of workability narrow all the time, unless they use Maguire or Garfield or both. Just to add a wrinkle to this, there's no guarantee Garfield will be interested; he stated he'd love to do another 'team-up' but he feels he's too old and has moved on from helming a solo Spidey film; while Maguire, whose career isn't exactly booming at the moment, is 100% up for reprising his role, albeit as a much older and wiser web-slinger.<p></p><p>Would a 'new' Spider-Man film work outside of the MCU? It depends on who made it and who wrote it; if it had the feel of Sam Raimi's originals but also the modern feel of the MCU then you'd struggle not to see it not working to certain extent. It would also throw a curveball at Disney because they essentially need to make a new MCU Spidey film inside five years and nine months of the release of the last one or they essentially renege on the deal they have and if you've been paying attention you'll be aware there's been friction between Disney and Sony over the character already and while Sony have been able to make Spider-Man films, there's a sort of gentlemen's agreement between the two companies that this would be limited to animation. There's nothing in the agreement between companies that states that Sony can't bring Maguire or Garfield back and frankly if they did it would probably limit the MCU Spidey to appearances in Avengers films or even complete retirement, as the third film in the MCU's trilogy effectively ended Peter Parker's association with the Marvel Universe. Disney wants to have a new Holland trilogy starting in 2026 and Sony's <b>Beyond the Spier-Verse</b> is scheduled for 2025, but there is a spider-sized hole in the schedules at the moment...</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhgmAA1F97UyNt5dRISvpPOFOS4hEG1Kp82SyhcBaLofoaQoaUXWrAbsWKycMWNLmk6d6zp9T6RcbtkHOUtn0V11AFeXC12A8uBKhhiDVMskr2xloIcBZKQYkvvqVN8hogMMzas4OwNEpaLb1KReOkm39oW5Qkvz3NDmT4ZPElKveFcsYgclg2qQZtmv9Hc" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="900" data-original-width="1600" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhgmAA1F97UyNt5dRISvpPOFOS4hEG1Kp82SyhcBaLofoaQoaUXWrAbsWKycMWNLmk6d6zp9T6RcbtkHOUtn0V11AFeXC12A8uBKhhiDVMskr2xloIcBZKQYkvvqVN8hogMMzas4OwNEpaLb1KReOkm39oW5Qkvz3NDmT4ZPElKveFcsYgclg2qQZtmv9Hc" width="320" /></a></div>The problem all the companies have is whether there's going to be an audience for anything they pump out. The MCU has shelved everything on its schedules apart from <b>Deadpool 3</b>, which they have renamed <b>Deadpool and Wolverine</b>, which is essentially one of the most shameless attempts at manipulating a film's potential audience as you will ever see. It might be an R rated movie, but you can guess there will also be a PG rated version as well (like there was for <b>Deadpool 2</b>) because Disney will want to maximise the audience for what will be their only 'superhero' release of 2024. Plus there's going to be so much tying it in with almost everything that has happened before, it's going to feel like a ride at a theme park rather than an actual story. I want to say I'm looking forward to it but I don't look forward to anything Marvel/Disney does any longer.<p></p><p>What we now know is the film will have the TVA in it, it will also have appearances by some of the X-Men and the main villain will be Cassandra Nova, the 'sister' of Charles Xavier, who will be played by Emma Corrin (she played Lady Di in <b>The Crown </b>and was in the execrable <b>Murder at the End of the World</b>). This character's inclusion has meant that rumours are rife that Patrick Stewart will reprise his role as Xavier - another forward thinking move by Disney, given that Stewart is in his 80s, so therefore has longevity on his side... The new trailer that was released last month also hints that The Hulk will be in it - this might be Eric Bana's Hulk or maybe even Ed Norton's, because if it had been Mark Ruffalo, he would have told everyone by now. Ruffalo might be back playing Ol' Greenskin soon enough, but more of that in a bit... We also know that almost every pre-MCU superhero film will be 'tagged' with even Jennifer Garner reprising her role as Elektra. Some are seeing a way to accept every Marvel film ever made as alternates from the multiverse and therefore give Disney a shot at showing all these films on their streaming platform if they can obtain the rights to show them. I mean, that's a cynical suggestion, I know, it's not like Disney is renowned for its altruism.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjxL7B11sJIrUEFcZS_7AikOTCbxguhzTD0kBYAaycw6jT7kWOYpYU0FscSj9ArchkWtdOM8HEDw9P5WT5U_rroyrrODAjtk6PeMLc0MRg1kI09HXb-RatRrQFfeCK01I06yntOIMjTFvouOqO9neZ-m48atuJ-StKSX1J6yWekkOnrFg0oYAd7QOgEoaXg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="1350" data-original-width="1080" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjxL7B11sJIrUEFcZS_7AikOTCbxguhzTD0kBYAaycw6jT7kWOYpYU0FscSj9ArchkWtdOM8HEDw9P5WT5U_rroyrrODAjtk6PeMLc0MRg1kI09HXb-RatRrQFfeCK01I06yntOIMjTFvouOqO9neZ-m48atuJ-StKSX1J6yWekkOnrFg0oYAd7QOgEoaXg=w320-h400" width="320" /></a></div>What I'm dreading and a lot of people are watching very closely is the <b>Fantastic Four </b>film, largely because many believe it's not going to be the saviour of the MCU. We're at a position with Disney where they want Marvel to continue to work for them and make loads of money, otherwise its purchase will be seen as a short term thing and if that happens many see them trying to sell it off - it's how these kinds of things work in US business. The comicbook industry is a cottage industry now, especially when the average price of a single issue is as much as it costs for 10 issues in 1990 and 25 issues in 1975 - I don't buy the 'inflation' argument, I do buy the 'we're going to screw as much money as we can from our dwindling audience as we can' theory. The films do not want to be going the way of the comics otherwise we might see an end to them all in the next ten years. The thing about the <b>FF</b> is simple, there's already a lot of negativity on line about it. Pedro Pascal might have replaced John Krasinski as the 'fan favourite' to play Reed Richards, but even that jars with many people. The rest of the casting hasn't gone down too well; Vanessa Kirby might have the right name but doesn't quite look the right fit. Joseph Quinn might have impressed some people in <b>Stranger Things</b> but is a relative unknown (both he and Kirby are Brits as well), and while I really like the casting of Ethan Moss-Bachrach as Ben Grimm that's my only real positive, internet buzz has been quiet on this.<p></p><p>Nothing else about the film is known, apart from Matt Shakman is directing it and the release date is two weeks after <b>Superman: Legacy</b>, the first James Gunn DC film. That alone is probably the biggest risk because if Gunn's film flops it's not going to ignite people's appetites for more super heroics, but if Gunn's film is a huge success it could go either way for this MCU film, depending on how good it is and what the audiences think - word of mouth could be essential. Shakman has MCU form as he directed (and produced) <b>WandaVision</b>, which considering what has happened since then was an absolute masterpiece of television.</p><p>Coming out a couple of months prior to the <b>FF</b> is <b>Captain America: Brave New World</b> (Feb 2025) and rumour has it that <b>Thunderbolts</b> (May 2025) might also be out before the first family make their bow and this is where rumours start to become just that - rumours. The latest Cap film has allegedly had a number of rewrites and reshoots - which, frankly, is usually the death knell of any MCU film - and <b>Thunderbolts</b>, which is going to be a Sebastian Stan, Florence Pugh, David Harbour and Wyatt Russell project with the Red Hulk as their leader might also feature the green Hulk and Mark Ruffalo, or it might feature Skaar, the green Hulk's son setting up his joining the Avengers or it might not be any of these things at all. The truth is far more simple - not even Marvel/MCU/Disney knows what is going to happen with these two films and there's even the chance they might not even appear. <b>Blade </b>is scheduled for the autumn of 2025 and there has been less than 10 days filming done on that film, despite what you might have read. The reality is if <b>Deadpool 3</b> is a success, it depends how much of a success it is as to whether there will be four MCU films in 2025 or just the one.</p><p>Regarding the Hulk, Kevin Feige has essentially dashed hopes of the third (second MCU) standalone movie, suggesting at a recent festival that the Hulk's story would be played out across a number of other MCU films where he would guest star. Industry insiders think this is likely to be the Cap and <b>Thunderbolts</b> films, possibly <b>Avengers 5</b> and one other. It appears there is no appetite within Disney for a solo Hulk film, which seems strange given the character's popularity, but equally it might be down to the fact that Ruffalo isn't particularly liked among Disney execs, given his propensity for talking or exposing things that are usually covered in Disney's standard NDAs.</p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjSolw1T2TJuRl5c_xLi8XuuAamTcvfKfPrzFxMzGb3qzItiEwwAk3fM9TDDLp-a65NHTskvSJ98h8Q5yAg5IXxq8JJz1UuItqwL5YxcyKyTHl4v1-PSyKudx0idHOQNlhRhwmfZq8XQDnw-IVr69SZlDDculylJsi6grAYD3WYopKerE_-5tetiLoIeTgX" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="474" data-original-width="474" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjSolw1T2TJuRl5c_xLi8XuuAamTcvfKfPrzFxMzGb3qzItiEwwAk3fM9TDDLp-a65NHTskvSJ98h8Q5yAg5IXxq8JJz1UuItqwL5YxcyKyTHl4v1-PSyKudx0idHOQNlhRhwmfZq8XQDnw-IVr69SZlDDculylJsi6grAYD3WYopKerE_-5tetiLoIeTgX" width="240" /></a></div>There are even suggestions that the Cap film might be turned into a four-part TV special, this is just a very unconfirmed rumour at the moment, but given that the film has been finished now for over 18 months and has been rewritten and reshot three times during that period suggests there is a major problem with it. Talking MCU TV; <b>Agatha: Coven of Chaos</b> is still scheduled for this year, no one at Disney has high hopes for what is likely to be a musical series and the proposed <b>Ironheart</b> series for 2025 has even less optimism around it, with several MCU people preferring the in limbo <b>Armour Wars</b> to be the 2025 series (it's supposed to be a film now but with the schedules already planned until 2026, who knows when that might happen) and maybe tying <b>Ironheart</b> into it or maybe even aiming that at a younger audience. The bottom line is the MCU's future in cinemas and on TV all depends on <b>Deadpool and Wolverine </b>and even then it isn't nailed on. There are lots of ifs and buts and Disney is playing its cards close to its proverbial chest. The feeling is <b>Deadpool and Wolverine</b> will be a success because the two Deadpool movies have appealed to non-comics fans and like <b>Guardians of the Galaxy</b> the character has built up its own standalone following; bringing Logan back in this film might smack of cynicism and commercialism, but Disney are a business and they will do anything they can to maximise profits. The problem here is that word 'standalone' - the third Guardians film was a hit because it appeals to a large group of people who weren't followers of the other MCU films; Disney aren't really going to be able to gauge what 2025 will bring off the back of one 2024 film.<div><p></p><p>Ultimately, the biggest problem with the majority of superhero films is the overall quality; the refusal of Disney, Warner or whoever to let a writer's vision be the sole input. Too many films are being ruined by committee and if what we hear is true about rewrites and reshoots to delayed projects from 2023 and 2024 then we can't really expect a return to the glory days of the MCU any time soon. The Jonathan Majors debacle hangs over their heads as well; had Disney dumped the disgraced actor as soon as allegations emerged then it would have been seen as judging a man guilty before his guilt had been proven, but waiting for the courts to decide has, ultimately, fucked Disney over. However, it might have solved a lot of problems, a friend of mine who is connected to Marvel and knows people connected to the film division said to me recently, "<b>Avengers: The Kang Dynasty</b> is dead. Whatever <b>Avengers 5</b> will be called it won't have Kang as the villain. Everything hinges on the <b>Fantastic Four</b> - that needs to be something special and I expect Dr Doom will be the lynchpin here. If Victor is a good villain in that movie then he'll return for <b>Avengers 5</b>." The dilemma here is that history isn't on the side of an FF film. Disney/MCU is trying to market the new film as a kind of de facto 'debut' of Marvel's first family, but we know there's both history and baggage and none of the previous incarnations - or their casts - are going to feature in any of the multiverse crossovers (they probably don't want to confuse the issue). If ever there was a case of putting all your eggs in one basket it's this one.</p><p>The other issue with <b>Avengers 5</b> is who is going to be in it? As it stands, the only original Avenger still 'under contract' is Ruffalo. Chris Hemsworth has not gone back on his criticism of <b>Thor 4</b> and has never stated he'd return to the role. There were rumours that he had an agreement in place to be part of the fifth Avengers movie, but aside from fan-made promo posters he is absent from MCU promo. It's unlikely that Jeremy Renner will return to Hawkeye, especially in the wake of his life-threatening injuries from 2023 and with the original Cap gone and Iron Man and Black Widow both dead, you either have their replacements (Sam Wilson, War Machine and the new Black Widow) or you pad the team out with the likes of Captain Marvel (unlikely as Brie Larson does not want to reprise her role) Doctor Strange, Shang-Chi and Spider-Man and even writing this paragraph I see an issue. Without your titular icons everything looks a little like barrel scraping. </p><p>Things change and in the world of superhero films those changes happen almost overnight. Given that superhero films have probably passed their sell-by dates it would probably be safe to say that nothing is carved in stone at the moment and whether something is in development or in the can it depends on the movie before it whether or not it will actually happen. There has been a tremendous amount of time and money invested in the genre and given the amount of money it has earned over the last 15 years it probably still has some good will left. The problem - the final and main problem - is whether or not the cinema going public has the appetite for more superhero films and because the quality of the most recent releases has been poor that appetite has diminished. There's still a core audience but that isn't big enough to make it a profitable practice. The next twelve months sees just one superhero film from the two major players and that is likely to be a success even if the film itself is a pile of shit (there's two from Sony - <b>Kraven</b> and <b>Venom 3</b> - but no one takes them seriously any longer; in fact all they do is just help precipitate the demise of the genre). </p><p>On its own <b>Deadpool and Wolverine</b> isn't going to revitalise the genre; it's a placeholder, it's there to remind people that superhero films are still going strong. What follows it is the most important; will the six expected superhero films in 2025 be able to attract people back to the cinemas in drovers? The answer to that has to be a resounding NO. Six? Four from the MCU and two from DC doesn't sound to me like aiming for quality over quantity; it sounds like desperation and a touch of wishful thinking. Of course, if the unthinkable happens and <b>Deadpool and Wolverine</b> is a flop (or doesn't make a shit ton of cash) then we might see yet another rethink. Watch this space. </p></div>Phil Hallhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12680058800847509275noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5979663737404474935.post-37367179761710002992024-03-09T10:51:00.000+00:002024-03-09T10:51:50.619+00:00Modern Culture - Is BACK!!! <p>I wanted the new look blogs to reflect something, but all they did was show me that I don't generate enough 'copy' for two regular blogs about roughly the same thing. Plus, there were some things that have happened I wanted to wibble on about but felt it was not important enough to have its own blog. So, let's reset the clocks and continue on where we left off at the end of December...</p><p><i>There might be spoilers here...</i></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">The End of Civilisation as We Know It</span></i></b></p><p>The first question I need to ask is why are there so many fucking atrocious movies being made? Who is stupid enough to finance these things and is it a form of masochism or do the idiots giving money to wankers really think they're going to make money from them? Over the last year or so we've watched some absolute stinkers; films that are worse than a really bad case of the norovirus, yet they still pump them out, like the dregs of your colon after having had more shits than your anus can withstand.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEicl_MLXer_4TuL6eTFcyVCGekN6mafYwQglPZJeFlDLS1VJZTQ01Mcs5YIbiQIL_B4MlkLX4f8_I0MN37jUuJ-DCiuX7oN0fBPv9Fs3VHTcMM5QdC6m5hKTbHvJCw3mN9V8RMCd8gpK0-yCjKKPdZQ6fSeNhzQps7CcF2OFeiz7Lp487FShgy4VKka0DyU" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="1280" data-original-width="1920" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEicl_MLXer_4TuL6eTFcyVCGekN6mafYwQglPZJeFlDLS1VJZTQ01Mcs5YIbiQIL_B4MlkLX4f8_I0MN37jUuJ-DCiuX7oN0fBPv9Fs3VHTcMM5QdC6m5hKTbHvJCw3mN9V8RMCd8gpK0-yCjKKPdZQ6fSeNhzQps7CcF2OFeiz7Lp487FShgy4VKka0DyU" width="320" /></a></div>To review the film <b>Argylle</b> I would need to be many things; a pedant about bad spelling, a critique of wankiness, a lover of faecal matter, a sexist twat - because, frankly, either Bryce Dallas Howard is having a secret affair with the filmmaker Matthew Vaughn or she knows where he's buried his bodies. The daughter of Ron Howard has rather gone downhill since her Jurassic Park days; she's carrying a lot of excess weight, her hair is bad, she's looking her 43 years and a bit more AND I really hate myself for being so cruel about her but I figure someone has to because it needs to be said. She was fucking awful in this film and when she 'fulfilled her potential' she was even more fucking awful. As a red head she's cute, as a blonde she looks like Adele before the diet but carrying extra weight. I'm sorry, this is not like me at all; I'm a bloody feminist and I should be glad that Vaughn cast the fat girl as the star of his new film, but he should have cast a fat girl who could fucking act.<p></p><p><b>Argylle</b> is abysmal. It is everything that is bad about movies that try to be a) clever and b) satirical. It is a giant turd on the rug outside your bedroom and it stinks like it's been there for a week. What on earth was Henry Cavill, John Cena, Bryan fucking Cranston, Sam Rockwell and Samuel L Jackson thinking? Actually we know what Jackson was thinking because he has form for appearing in films that are worse than having a squirting arse ejecting warm brown liquid. This is essentially a film about a rubbish women writer who has a James Bond like hero who discovers she's being pursued by spies because she might be writing the truth in her shit books, except she's not that at all, she's really a former spy who is so fucking brilliant she makes James Bond seem like a valet, except she can't remember anything apart from being a shit writer who is scared of her own shadow. It's two hours and fucking 12 minutes long? Vaughn - who made the King's Man films, which are fun secret agent movies - managed to make a movie that was simultaneously too long and one of the worst things ever made and it was released by Apple TV, proving that even this beacon of brilliance is capable of shitting on the rug and not cleaning it up.</p><p>THIS. IS. A. FUCKING. EMBARRASSING. AND. DISGUSTING. MESS.</p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">The The?</span></i></b></p><p>Huh? Did you know that the film <b>Bad Times at the El Royale</b> actually translates to 'Bad Times at The The Royal'? It probably should be called Bad Times at El Royale but the double 'the' helps the title flow better. If this was the only thing I have to say about this 2018 movie then we'd be in dodgy territory, but actually it's a bloody entertaining film.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjgBZDnJ-1opjOkcPyJJBq6Febzvmr7SRcPVHgUjRKa-7sUsZpuJwOAkWH-hUEAdwNFIyWeFsymjCanQWuFor3X1RvNbs-J2NT8ps48-PsNXWLSxSn3NFBbt_2fshXos-1Cy0wxqa-vWINO_hirvybJ9lznZ8gu0y-YoAo9N5b0TT5AvDk5tHIPdOEgNRru" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="1333" data-original-width="2000" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjgBZDnJ-1opjOkcPyJJBq6Febzvmr7SRcPVHgUjRKa-7sUsZpuJwOAkWH-hUEAdwNFIyWeFsymjCanQWuFor3X1RvNbs-J2NT8ps48-PsNXWLSxSn3NFBbt_2fshXos-1Cy0wxqa-vWINO_hirvybJ9lznZ8gu0y-YoAo9N5b0TT5AvDk5tHIPdOEgNRru" width="320" /></a></div>Four unrelated strangers turn up at a hotel that straddles the California/Nevada states border all looking for a room. Jon Hamm is a vacuum cleaner salesman who is full of himself; Jeff Bridges is a slightly bewildered priest, Cynthia Erivo is a singer and Dakota Johnson just tells people to fuck off. Lewis Pullman is the young guy - Miles - with the responsibility of doing everything from receptionist to cleaner to bar keep. All of them clearly don't want to be there... or do they?<p></p><p>Before this encounter at the El Royale there's a flashback to 1959 - ten years earlier than when this is set; there's a man - played by Nick Offerman - who 'buries' a bag under the floorboards in one of the rooms and is then shot and killed. So far so mysterious. What we discover quite quickly is that Hamm doesn't sell vacuum cleaners, he's in the FBI. Bridges isn't a priest, he's an ex con and he's after the money. Erivo is a singer, but because she's black and this is 1969 her life isn't straight forward and Johnson appears to have kidnapped a girl and is keeping her hostage in her room. These rooms are all... remarkable for a specific reason and Miles is as shady as fuck. What follows is a Tarantino-esque interlocking story that jumps back and forth in the now and is embellished by flashbacks to explain the backstories of the guests.</p><p>When all kinds of shit hits the fan it's time for would be Messiah Chris Hemsworth to enter the picture. This dime store Charles Manson brings his own kind of mayhem and chaos to proceedings and the film spirals out of control in a continuing orgy of violence and terror with a mysterious twist involving a reel of film that could incriminate someone extremely famous but now dead... It's a really 'fun' film with all manner of shocks, twists and turns with unexpected shit happening almost from the first few moments on. This is most definitely a movie you can't second guess and as it was on Film 4 a few weeks ago, there's a good chance it will reappear before long, so set your recorders for it, it's worth watching.</p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Strictly Come Barking Mad</span></i></b></p><p>As it was the wife's birthday, she could choose whatever she wanted - off the Flash Drive of Doom - to watch and she opted for <b>Silver Linings Playbook</b>, a film I never really been that bothered about (otherwise we'd have watched it by now) and have sort of managed to put her off in the past when she's suggested it.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhek7ZuUDyp8cEXFdOfzwYO636nlBevRpfFi6TUbzpUbZoHM62gM1D2OwtiHjJxInNnTmAKVIwZnEBzhrWJ2xh1EsVE4PanABgABI55gT1G8wmJFm6SPRDWLax36cUZKvMalWy7xFNPvsG4Msa4IeH7snov8KYyNwKuokiEsXs-un2AMl7Gu7pOOyzQsdI4" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="852" data-original-width="1280" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhek7ZuUDyp8cEXFdOfzwYO636nlBevRpfFi6TUbzpUbZoHM62gM1D2OwtiHjJxInNnTmAKVIwZnEBzhrWJ2xh1EsVE4PanABgABI55gT1G8wmJFm6SPRDWLax36cUZKvMalWy7xFNPvsG4Msa4IeH7snov8KYyNwKuokiEsXs-un2AMl7Gu7pOOyzQsdI4" width="320" /></a></div>This is an Oscar winning film starring Celeb A listers - Bradley Cooper and Jennifer Lawrence, with back up from Robert De Niro - we're talking BIG guns in a film that was probably made with the Academy Awards in mind. Both Lawrence and Cooper had emerged as big stars and the idea of a comedy/drama/romance about a man who is bipolar and a young woman with her own - undiagnosed - mental health problems was probably the kind of thing that gets award givers massive orgasms and to be fair it wasn't a bad film. My problem with it was it took me ages to like the film or to feel anything like interest in the characters, which was probably the entire point. Cooper is obsessed about his ex-wife, he is a mass of OCDs, mood swings and potentially is a danger to himself and others; Lawrence, since the tragic death of her husband, has been sleeping around, is reckless and potentially dangerous. The thing is even De Niro, who plays Cooper's father, is a bag of superstitions and were it not for the family safety net around him would probably have been diagnosed with his own mental health issues. <div><p></p><p>Once you start to like the characters, to see past their flaws and foibles, the film begins to unfold, but it takes its time and even when the two leads do their thing - getting involved in a dance competition - it all feels a bit contrived. I mean, I get it that Cooper's character has to be seen still obsessed about his wife, but it was obvious almost from the moment Lawrence walked into the film that this was going to be about these two people and the love story that was inevitably going to happen, but they stretched it out and played it to the point where the reveal at the end was always going to go the way you thought it was. There wasn't really ever a moment where you think 'will they, won't they?' The biggest thing for me was how they miraculously cured each other, because apart from one time you never saw him take his meds and yet he became a calm, reasonable guy with little or no evidence to suggest otherwise. Don't get me wrong, I enjoyed the movie, it worked as a birthday night treat, but I felt as though... I dunno... it was dressed up to be more than it actually was.</p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">The Thick End of It</span></i></b></p><p>The conclusion of <b>Criminal Record</b> was neither straightforward nor was it expected. The real antagonist had been seen a few times throughout the eight parts, but never with any or even the slightest indication he might be involved and while there were several things in the end to implicate Peter Capaldi's DCI Dan Hegarty, it appeared to be mainly his loose cannon henchmen and helpers who did all the donkey work.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiVrVVUenDSbLy46pltg0PwEWzlrwrFWvrWqQVlMh-p02SF_HdYdnR1AUwF9Pc25JrfKkSDLBrDYWVHXFeehdD_0DEGO1eEUbg-cHr1v8K-XXvvldfMNY2cXTb6cTQtjWmxLW6OHBPjFfB2PEyK1yAZCbk7wCCAY3vHNbIc_My0LOppNcRGj8g5c-J15HDL" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="266" data-original-width="474" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiVrVVUenDSbLy46pltg0PwEWzlrwrFWvrWqQVlMh-p02SF_HdYdnR1AUwF9Pc25JrfKkSDLBrDYWVHXFeehdD_0DEGO1eEUbg-cHr1v8K-XXvvldfMNY2cXTb6cTQtjWmxLW6OHBPjFfB2PEyK1yAZCbk7wCCAY3vHNbIc_My0LOppNcRGj8g5c-J15HDL" width="320" /></a></div>The thing about that last paragraph is, it isn't precisely true; it appears that way but when all the facts are out there's still this nagging thing in DSI June Lenker's mind (Cush Jumbo) and the last thing she does is figure it out. It is possible that Errol was framed for his girlfriend's murder so that the Met could be seen being tough, especially in the wake of the 2011 Tottenham riots and it was most definitely sloppy police work by Hegarty's #1 undercover cop and his right hand man, but when all the pieces started to fall into place and Lenker was finally getting to the crux of the matter, this was a series that still managed to deliver some shocks. The most shocking thing about it though was its stark depiction of racism within the Metropolitan Police - something that is still a millstone around the Met's metaphoric neck, among many problems facing the capital's police force. There is something decidedly 1980s about Hegarty's top men and one has to ask, in a show about modern policing, how can these dinosaurs still function and get away with things. There were some factual inaccuracies about the series; stuff that whoever wrote it should have known or been informed of by whoever was giving them relevant information and it was probably two episodes too long, but it's worth watching, even if, in the end, you still feel a little cheated despite the 'happy' ending.<p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">The Madness of Parents</span></i></b></p><p>The wife struggled with <b>The Big Door Prize</b> while I struggled with why the wife didn't like it as much as me. It's been an inventive and slightly bonkers series that highlighted something existential rather than physical. It was a wee bit strange and not always in a good way, but I thought that was what made it all the more agreeable.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgB3am3iw0v3eNCT-tXGoa57aJVE1ojDl1kPYxNux1nZoypmTPYRwBWXyMB3ZVd1Tmj8m8LCKcT71dB0Ce2IdULu1-H2Nn57IsHTHmhmkaCq_dBQKBmGRWId-kSXWd2_cpJKsJ72mPjBrMSXPgbp732MrK3eesWrEvE64BLnTwbNjKka3i86VEjvLNOIFTu" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="1366" data-original-width="2048" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgB3am3iw0v3eNCT-tXGoa57aJVE1ojDl1kPYxNux1nZoypmTPYRwBWXyMB3ZVd1Tmj8m8LCKcT71dB0Ce2IdULu1-H2Nn57IsHTHmhmkaCq_dBQKBmGRWId-kSXWd2_cpJKsJ72mPjBrMSXPgbp732MrK3eesWrEvE64BLnTwbNjKka3i86VEjvLNOIFTu" width="320" /></a></div>I think it was the juxtaposition of the situation that played well. Something you'd imagine the kids would be obsessed with becomes the property of the adults. That's not to say the kids haven't been sucked into it but they quickly moved on in most cases, while the parents and adults remain obsessed with the the Morpho machine that has been telling them what their true life potential is. It's a bit like Facebook 15 years ago, when the youth were into it and the adults cottoned on and suddenly the kids were no longer into it because their parents had taken it over. That's this show in a nutshell and it not only took over the lives of the adults it turned them all into strange versions of themselves; versions that stopped being normal and became extravagant versions that people stopped liking or respecting. Or at least that's what you think until the last couple of episodes, then you start to realise that's there's more to this than you imagined and that this is simply the first stage - arguably the caterpillar in the Morpho's life cycle...<p></p><p>Chris O'Dowd and the ensemble cast all become different versions of themselves; like they were all given a weird drug that reawakened their adolescence and blocked their sanities as their 'potentials' became the overriding thing in almost all of their lives rather than pod people from a bizarre Sci-Fi story. The thing I liked about it especially was while O'Dowd's Dusty and his family are the central point of it, it spent every episode focusing on someone else; someone important to the town of Deerfield and someone who has possibly been driven slightly insane by the Morpho's 'command'. Of course the main problem I have is I think it's a shaggy dog story, because I don't know if there's really an explanation because there would be no explanation that would satisfy the joke. Season one leaves us with a cliffhanger ending with more mysteries than we began with and the biggest one being the blue spots, which we first saw on Dusty in episode one and have taken a back seat since. The thing is I absolutely loved this show; it has a mixture of really likeable characters and arseholes with hearts of gold. I want it to have some resolution and I really want there to be explanations, it hits all the right weird buttons for me but in a gentle understated way; we could be talking about something really sinister in a year's time, but I somehow can't believe that. Absolutely highly recommended. <br /></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Super Boring</span></i></b></p><p>What if The X-Men was made as a low budget heist movie? That's pretty much the premise for <b>Code 8</b> a film about 'enabled' people set in a world that's slightly different from our own. It's about superpowered individuals who have been outlawed because of their unique abilities and it is essentially everything The X-Men has ever wanted to be, apart from the fact it was badly acted, had a lousy story and the special effects were... limited.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEh9bbsk6lfIF37MnG4y1LQy8oJgkfJEp4JjS9sOhgzrpUQgRYo-b7uifK5GdPa7nVARiC-KT0lOeBxsskhaxdrvpPwuZOVLIPM4Jb0JwyQmAoClVRp3JL421KCubXRRfrBrA5XUSBiAUzGwuGa5JWnj_JaJun2rJeY07bJHgFa_UaoFxDzkcySVNu82ne5Z" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="720" data-original-width="1694" height="136" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEh9bbsk6lfIF37MnG4y1LQy8oJgkfJEp4JjS9sOhgzrpUQgRYo-b7uifK5GdPa7nVARiC-KT0lOeBxsskhaxdrvpPwuZOVLIPM4Jb0JwyQmAoClVRp3JL421KCubXRRfrBrA5XUSBiAUzGwuGa5JWnj_JaJun2rJeY07bJHgFa_UaoFxDzkcySVNu82ne5Z" width="320" /></a></div>It's about a man with superhuman abilities who works with a group of criminals to raise money to help his sick mother. It stars cousins Robbie and Stephen Amell (no, me neither) and the best thing I can say about it was the people responsible for it tried very hard to make a half decent film but failed because they didn't have a particularly good story to work with. It was overwrought, heavy on the earnest and tried admirably to create a universe that borrowed so heavily from the X-Men that I expected to see more than just people who can generate electricity, or heal people or are telekinetic. We opted to watch this because the sequel came out recently and we figured if it was good enough for a sequel it might be worth watching. It wasn't; they shouldn't have; don't be fooled, it's 90 minutes of your life you'll wish you'd spent punching yourself in the face or wanking off an 80-year-old tramp with syphilis. <br /><p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">A New Nadir?</span></i></b></p><p>We watch <b>Resident Alien</b> in the hope that something positive might happen; that these caricatures of the characters from the first series will remember who they are and forget they've spent a season and a half jumping sharks for fun, but instead we are left with something that surely the actors must realise is a load of ridiculous pretentious wank.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEizvFMGi-nHUbymDfnZutyrokNb1jbJXa7EIcKxEVDh5DEKsOFz2NjNv_VXVR2NhpRfTlrdet78Bx9I0bauDpSFDEbP28g-kE93Cy355GnJ-rsuPuXfVoB5grLHB-fmdgTsyXaAyC-i1m8X0pNqCLOz0SE8gxzX6MNPOhbI8ozjZhprcpFqwbJneDgm3eER" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="303" data-original-width="474" height="205" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEizvFMGi-nHUbymDfnZutyrokNb1jbJXa7EIcKxEVDh5DEKsOFz2NjNv_VXVR2NhpRfTlrdet78Bx9I0bauDpSFDEbP28g-kE93Cy355GnJ-rsuPuXfVoB5grLHB-fmdgTsyXaAyC-i1m8X0pNqCLOz0SE8gxzX6MNPOhbI8ozjZhprcpFqwbJneDgm3eER" width="320" /></a></div>The halfway mark of this (hopefully) final series was something of a real low point for the series as Big Arse Asta and her adopted daughter (the one she gave away not got) meet their adopted family at a big Native American shindig for the marriage of their gay cousin. Meanwhile D'Arcy has realised she's a fucking mess; the Mayor's wife is creating grisly children's books and Harry has fallen in love with the bird alien who has been trapped here by a banana. This, on a good day, would have been far too much for a 40 minute episode, but we also had a new subplot, the demented sheriff and his assistant Liv discover things (or rather Liv does but Mike takes the credit, as usual), Linda Hamilton, who came across as menacing once, is now old and stupid in her bunker of alien fighting and there was an alien portal fixer who likes stale pretzels. There is so much going on you'd almost feel as though it's good value for money, but it's shite; big stinky shite with sweetcorn you wouldn't give to a dog. There are four more episodes to go and it all has to be resolved because if it ends on a cliffhanger and there's a threat it might be back for more I'm going to [redacted] with prejudice. <p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Aping About</span></i></b></p><p>In anticipation of <b>Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes</b> coming out in a few months, we decided to watch the 'first' trilogy and that meant giving <b>Rise of the Planet of the Apes</b> a second watch, almost 13 years after the first. It's a cracking film spoiled by some dodgy special effects, but one gets the impression there might not have been that much confidence about it making a trilogy.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhJv08Sy263banq1WPwGgmD08ngpecnOQf4hWlta5W8jhN25UA81K2CmkB0jD_V_7ddeLMrnil7KEOxHNwe6ja0scXWExtOIrmdzi4J2Y74TRvAQRyXt8eHylvHtxlfC5B0v7vVuG0_nUVSzGT9foEv9MoB0XjOSMRraNWlFehNND1fytxUR_ZU6cmxE84k" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="1333" data-original-width="2000" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhJv08Sy263banq1WPwGgmD08ngpecnOQf4hWlta5W8jhN25UA81K2CmkB0jD_V_7ddeLMrnil7KEOxHNwe6ja0scXWExtOIrmdzi4J2Y74TRvAQRyXt8eHylvHtxlfC5B0v7vVuG0_nUVSzGT9foEv9MoB0XjOSMRraNWlFehNND1fytxUR_ZU6cmxE84k" width="320" /></a></div>It is a movie that predates the pandemic but is really about the start of one that will leave the planet ravaged and depleted of humans - but that comes later. This is about Cesar and his development from son of a lab ape to leader of the first rebellion against humanity and his 'father' James Franco, the man who develops a cure for Alzheimer's with a sting in the tail and then Cesar's journey from lovable family chimp to an ape (I almost called him a man) who sees all that is wrong in humanity - as well as much of what is right - and decides, fatefully, where his beliefs lie. As an 'origin' story it works exceptionally well and even the potentially far fetched ideas being developed at GenSys - the company that likes experimenting on primates - have a ring of truth about them, because money is the thing that drives this - the be all and end of humanity. If I could of had one thing done different it would have been to have Cesar smile occasionally - after his epiphany. I get it he was the reluctant Messiah but, you know, dark and brooding got too intense at times; maybe a sly smile or a grin whenever things went his way wouldn't have gone a miss.<p></p><p>Onwards to <b>Dawn</b>... Next week.<br /></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">There's Something About Cena</span></i></b></p><p>Do you remember the Farrelly Brothers? They did comedies around the turn of the millennium that pushed the boundaries of good and bad taste. Well Peter Farrelly is back with a new film called <b>Ricky Stanicky</b> and it doesn't matter how hard I try not to, I just can't recommend this enough. It's simply a riotous comedy that pushes all the buttons of 13 year old me.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgFsDgfy3IunJlyG-a5I4SEJakbeQgtYmQejbXziS6qZQL4gcdOnqDlQGLxdl77vOeyk5EhjMgVeCduEvHEOAVYqMrjOtrHafhtWWwiuxczoE45rJ7pLL6Sz7snlGUsbbPQk9V2PRKGCWqcjpv_PXEr_1ckgwF8UnPB_NvuNX3eDJXR06RnXCewlLvM6KyD" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="237" data-original-width="474" height="160" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgFsDgfy3IunJlyG-a5I4SEJakbeQgtYmQejbXziS6qZQL4gcdOnqDlQGLxdl77vOeyk5EhjMgVeCduEvHEOAVYqMrjOtrHafhtWWwiuxczoE45rJ7pLL6Sz7snlGUsbbPQk9V2PRKGCWqcjpv_PXEr_1ckgwF8UnPB_NvuNX3eDJXR06RnXCewlLvM6KyD" width="320" /></a></div>Zac Efron and two other actors play lifelong friends who use their imaginary mate Ricky as an excuse to get away with all kinds of shit throughout their lives. If they need an excuse for something, they use Ricky. Weekend away? Ricky Stanicky. To get out of a family occasion, they use Ricky. The thing is over the years they have used and abused Ricky so much he's now a superhero - he's a charity working, tree-hugging liberal who knows Bono, works in Africa, has survived cancer a number of times and people in our trio of friends' lives are beginning to think that Ricky doesn't exist. So they decide to use the talents of a jobbing actor they met in Atlantic City to pose as Stanicky to convince friends and family once and for all that the eponymous hero exists.<p></p><p>That actor is John Cena and he's given a 'bible' of Stanicky's life, which he has to memorise and hoof his way through a circumcision ceremony and he doesn't just do a good job, he's startlingly great at being the man who doesn't exist. The problem is he makes so much of an impression he can't or rather doesn't want to go back to his own life. This is a crude, rude and lewd film, but it's also hilarious without being too OTT. Cena is brilliant as Rod aka Ricky to the point where you wonder what he has up his sleeve next, because since <b>Peacemaker</b> he's been the best thing in almost everything he's been in. He was probably the best thing in <b>Argylle</b>, he just wasn't on screen for long as Matthew Vaughn opted for all the wankers in his cast instead. This is a feelgood comedy that has an abundance of penis jokes, a brilliant turn from the wondrous William H Macy and while it is nothing but a silly and very contrived comedy, it is funny and it is worth your time and it's the best thing I've seen this week.</p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">More Than Ordinary</span></i></b></p><p>This week also saw the return of <b>Extraordinary</b>, the TV comedy about superheroes that managed to make it into my top ten TV shows of 2023. We're only two episodes in at the moment, but it has retained its weird quirkiness as Jen - MΓ‘irΓ©ad Tyers - the only person without superpowers in a world full of super powered people and Jizz Lord finally start to date. He was once her cat but has returned to being human and at the end of last series also discovered he had a wife and child.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgQHcYl75jHzqSdXA-3Oo09rlQg0ZgLhXq6HzaTAav_RdDWLBcDP5-3IIz6J2AYq1KeYMmm3p3WUCHaDAp7FNeeJW7sPyjzbe-7zsGc_dqNpJFOpDYJJEID6UcaLcXOMlwu4tNEqHiqlew02JYckJxiDZHhTTa8X75iQJ9Eouyu1O3SUHUqGtKhvcp4kBu4" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="307" data-original-width="474" height="207" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgQHcYl75jHzqSdXA-3Oo09rlQg0ZgLhXq6HzaTAav_RdDWLBcDP5-3IIz6J2AYq1KeYMmm3p3WUCHaDAp7FNeeJW7sPyjzbe-7zsGc_dqNpJFOpDYJJEID6UcaLcXOMlwu4tNEqHiqlew02JYckJxiDZHhTTa8X75iQJ9Eouyu1O3SUHUqGtKhvcp4kBu4" width="320" /></a></div>Jen's raised the Β£12,000 she needs to find out and uncover her latent superpowers while still working in a second hand clothes store and trying to sort the lives of her two roommates out - one who can channel dead people and the other has control over time. Tyers is a quirky and very attractive lead (despite this only being about the fourth or fifth thing she's ever been in) and she is both funny and sexy at the same time. One wonders what her character sees in Rob aka Jizz - Luke Rollason - because he's extremely odd looking and doesn't have much of a personality; but it works in a weird sort of way and this is a series that has a feel about it, like <b>Spaced</b> did in the late 1990s - like there's going to be a lot of breakout stars. <p></p><p>The running subplot in the background is Carrie and Kash's split - these are Jen's two roommates who split up at the end of the first series, but are struggling with that decision. Carrie is ditsy and not really sure what she wants to do with her life and Kash might be able to manipulate time but he's largely an absolute wanker without an iota of common sense.</p><p>I suppose it hasn't got the anarchic feel the first series had because we're familiar with the four main characters now, but it has a strange charm that makes it likeable. We'll have finished the series by this time next week so more of a review then, but so far so good.</p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Next Week...</span></i></b></p><p>We've got <b>Damsel</b> lined up for our Saturday night film and the rest of <b>Extraordinary</b> to get through. The usual stuff - that would be fucking <b>Resident Alien</b> - that we're cluttering the week up with and the other two POTA films plus whatever finds its way onto our screens in the interim. We were going to give <b>The Completely Made Up Adventures of Dick Turpin</b> a try by gave up on it after less than three minutes because it reminded me of <b>Rentaghost</b> and I didn't like or watch that. We might start on <b>Constellation</b> and equally we might give up on it as well. Whatever we watch you'll be the first to know about it. </p></div>Phil Hallhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12680058800847509275noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5979663737404474935.post-12449561362162109172024-03-02T13:42:00.001+00:002024-03-02T13:42:24.410+00:00TV Culture - Compact and Bijou?<p><i>Another short one with just four things reviewed this week (we watched a lot of films) and there's likely to be some spoilers, so tread carefully...</i></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">A Scandi Fling</span></i></b></p><p>I suppose the first thing you can ask about <b>Martin Compston's Norwegian Fling</b> is why Phil MacHugh doesn't get equal billing? I know he's not as well known as the <b>Line of Duty</b> star but he is just as much the equal star of this show as he was when they did the <b>Scottish Fling</b> in 2022. </p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgxgATmPU1TBER6VjzNLzKhC4lySK45n9w7Va8GMbud58iLgi1lLcnitkD0KmIeYDXKF43F1IvWb7tu5pX_z1uHajiE2qHDHJ0XA6xFzK9J-INMQ1OttV6ilro0lntgF7p0uU_NABADQZsA5uX81ISspShq-GUzsnOeEabxVt_ODGpE-krTCCDB88eUPX9s" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="144" data-original-width="400" height="115" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgxgATmPU1TBER6VjzNLzKhC4lySK45n9w7Va8GMbud58iLgi1lLcnitkD0KmIeYDXKF43F1IvWb7tu5pX_z1uHajiE2qHDHJ0XA6xFzK9J-INMQ1OttV6ilro0lntgF7p0uU_NABADQZsA5uX81ISspShq-GUzsnOeEabxVt_ODGpE-krTCCDB88eUPX9s" width="320" /></a></div>It's a fun series, with two very amiable (and Scottish) presenters obviously having a great time in a land that is similar but very different from Scotland. There's an honesty about both men that makes you realise that there's no acting or pretending here, especially when they're facing something out of their comfort zone - such as eating a sheep's head, being kissed by wolves or going through oil rig training, or in MacHugh's case, anything that's about about six feet off the ground - he's a wee bit afeard of heights. One observation though, it's clear that there's some judicious editing taking place and things that happen in each 30 minute episode were not chronologically filmed, so what you're left with is a series that seems to meander back and forth in the opening episodes. The aim is to get to the furthest northern most point in Europe and there they discover that summer usually lasts about TWO days a year, which sounds tragic, especially considering the sun doesn't set for nearly a month! <div><p>It's surprisingly camp and the two lads' affection to Euro-pop and rave music is even more obvious in this series than it was in the last and when Phil meets Dagne - Norway's pop superstar you worry about the state of his underpants he gets soooo excited. It's all very entertaining even if, sadly, it's a wee bit superficial at times - that's not to say it should be cutting edge, because it isn't that kind of show, but like so many of these travelogues there probably could have been so much more they could have seen. </p><div><p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">A Dud But Not Crap</span></i></b></p><p>We found something from Apple TV+ that we decided wasn't for us, so much so we switched off before the 25 minute mark deciding it was simply too twee and ridiculous to be able to take seriously...</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjnEwxh7c-E8fN4bf80gGVKE12meqj28eRXDABQx8H-2z-Cf-Ac3hWGQ9TNA7S0j7X98717Ld5-iCEQoI7ubgv0gVO18ejeIEDOIrgPkPywcKHb34ox9unDyNsTGXdN6oQ4FcstRvAojmveZd8KY13mF_rTT7ISjLx2nWPraR9FCZKAg8pJKOQTiGIfsJMb" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="1080" data-original-width="1920" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjnEwxh7c-E8fN4bf80gGVKE12meqj28eRXDABQx8H-2z-Cf-Ac3hWGQ9TNA7S0j7X98717Ld5-iCEQoI7ubgv0gVO18ejeIEDOIrgPkPywcKHb34ox9unDyNsTGXdN6oQ4FcstRvAojmveZd8KY13mF_rTT7ISjLx2nWPraR9FCZKAg8pJKOQTiGIfsJMb" width="320" /></a></div><b>Home Before Dark </b>is an intriguing premise; a nine-year-old investigative journalist with a nose for true crime, but, you know... utter bollocks in almost every other conceivable way. It's not badly made, in fact it has all the hallmarks of an Apple TV show, but how do you take something seriously when your main protagonist is nine and unlikely to be taken seriously? The answer is simple, you can't unless you live in American TV land. Yes, her father is or was a good journalist, but he got fired, either for something he did wrong or being surplus to demands, in which case he couldn't have been <i>that</i> good. What I did learn from the half of an episode we watched is that the child doesn't trust anything; she has a suspicious nature that reads mystery into everything she sees and I don't mean in a Sherlock Holmesian way, but in a paranoid way and for a nine-year-old this is a worry. It might float your boat, it didn't float ours.<p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Grow Your Potential</span></i></b></p><p>I'd never heard of the newish Chris O'Dowd 'comedy' <b>The Big Door Prize</b> until I was searching for Apple TV shows I'd not heard about and while I wasn't particularly enamoured by premise - a mysterious machine suddenly appears in the hardware store that tells people what they <i>should </i>be in life - I decided that ATV comedies have been good so far so it would be worth our while checking it out.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhgzEgl-MQR_47THbC76DTgcevNFZhv0J0cvkODZsZxgP80hPIc8Z4AaJr27tn-ybRkDJwf5c0dw15bi-zyxIB3KWZku7I7a97Y4h1rJkv6gbMNxbwDBElNdzJK6EaQNyDZfx_eQGHsB_Xagsbh2yNr0CMwBUfSkscyk3XS-zuys01FlmFnpMmJLJ3fqQkL" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="552" data-original-width="980" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhgzEgl-MQR_47THbC76DTgcevNFZhv0J0cvkODZsZxgP80hPIc8Z4AaJr27tn-ybRkDJwf5c0dw15bi-zyxIB3KWZku7I7a97Y4h1rJkv6gbMNxbwDBElNdzJK6EaQNyDZfx_eQGHsB_Xagsbh2yNr0CMwBUfSkscyk3XS-zuys01FlmFnpMmJLJ3fqQkL" width="320" /></a></div>O'Dowd plays Dusty, an Irish-born schoolteacher who it appears is well loved by the entire town of Deerfield where he lives with his wife and daughter. It's his 40th birthday and he is about to venture into the biggest midlife existential crisis of them all...<p></p><p>The arrival of the new 'machine' has a totally unexpected effect on the town and everyone is talking about it and it is causing a profound change in the population. Add to this the subplots - the main one being the death of O'Dowd's daughter's boyfriend and the suspicion that his death was caused by his own brother; but there's also the decision by Dusty's parents to happily divorce, or his wife being told by the machine that she is Royalty! It's most definitely an 18-rated comedy and there are your usual annoying USA people in it, but it could easily have been set anywhere in the world. I don't know if I'd call it a comedy because there isn't any particular laugh out loud moments, but it is light hearted with a dark undertone and O'Dowd - who relocated to the USA a few years ago - makes a genial lead. His own crisis begins when the machine tells him what his true potential is and then the intrigue begins. We're sticking with this one, probably to see how dark and tragic it can get. </p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Almost Done?</span></i></b></p><p>"Well, I suppose it was a bit better this week." These were the words uttered by the wife after the third episode of the third season of <b>Resident Alien</b> finished. There were some more amusing bits in it - provided mainly by Liv - and it showed its ability to deal with tragedy and the nastiness of humanity, something it's been loathe to do for a long time.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEi33XTpsAa91qQ5-DHGxeYJdQTonABpjUcMV1FjpmhAszoCEEP6Mapqy6YJ6qXoVBVxB6Nr7DCxZvV0_Z4fuZ2mSNmQgNlpAObIjvSZdRzv2xmmGELqCoGtTcQCyskPDIEunGF37hgKGR-trOGDM7Z-P9i0lGz-13EMaOGzyD3egU61n-ELMCQLx08TNYvx" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="237" data-original-width="474" height="160" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEi33XTpsAa91qQ5-DHGxeYJdQTonABpjUcMV1FjpmhAszoCEEP6Mapqy6YJ6qXoVBVxB6Nr7DCxZvV0_Z4fuZ2mSNmQgNlpAObIjvSZdRzv2xmmGELqCoGtTcQCyskPDIEunGF37hgKGR-trOGDM7Z-P9i0lGz-13EMaOGzyD3egU61n-ELMCQLx08TNYvx" width="320" /></a></div>The problem, however, is whether or not we're going to stick with it. The wife also said, "It's better than <b>Monarch: Legacy of Monsters</b>," which left me asking how she could say such a thing. It turns out her main problem with that Godzilla-themed mini-series was the actual lack of monsters in it and boring story line. From my perspective, I think <b>Resident Alien</b> is a load of shite; it isn't without its charms, but they are so few and far between now I'm desperately hoping for some sign those charms are going to reappear. My gut feeling is it has outgrown (or maybe shrunk) its welcome and we need to leave it alone and move into and onto other things. It is unlikely to jump the shark and get better. Watch this space.<br /><p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Criminal Minds?</span></i></b></p><p>There isn't much doubt that the newly finished Apple TV show <b>Criminal Record</b> is about black and white policing - literally and metaphorically. Peter Capaldi plays a Detective Chief Inspector and was the lead officer on a murder case from 2011 - one that seemed cut and dried but has since had certain events bring it back into the minds of the police and the campaigners for justice. Cush Jumbo plays a Detective Sargent who is given a simple domestic violence case to deal with that opens up a proper can of worms for her.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgKSDVPx6ue3Zdlgg696yn0jfCAy4VoXc3nflbvV8_JPwrUq0QPuQC_-Dz8UgVIzPUkkqxJT55CH6WYcKBGfFqsvKA-d6WQfY7hXrZwUenSXxksXw1yrV5D_GPViOlsympdyMfwWCwNoAcFHwnZqQPQQizWqln7FinW_0Y0_5wGWHNT6G9INHAqc2eLly7s" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="266" data-original-width="474" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgKSDVPx6ue3Zdlgg696yn0jfCAy4VoXc3nflbvV8_JPwrUq0QPuQC_-Dz8UgVIzPUkkqxJT55CH6WYcKBGfFqsvKA-d6WQfY7hXrZwUenSXxksXw1yrV5D_GPViOlsympdyMfwWCwNoAcFHwnZqQPQQizWqln7FinW_0Y0_5wGWHNT6G9INHAqc2eLly7s" width="320" /></a></div>What is black and white about this is the murder from 2011. it's clear that Capaldi's character Hegarty is trying to cover his arse about something, while Jumbo's Lenker is doing something she really needs to back away from - ruffling the feathers of powerful colleagues. As a result there is an awful lot of deceit, lies and double crossing going on in the opening two episodes, as Lenker goes down what she feels is a new path for an old crime and doesn't realise she's been set up, big time, by the powerful Hegarty, who already has the police's Internal Affairs department on her back, not least because she's been doing some dodgy police work to try and placate her seriously paranoid and elderly mother. One thing is clear though, the man who has been jailed and initially admitted to killing his partner in 2011 probably isn't guilty, but the powerful policemen are going to ensure that this conviction is safe because if there is a doubt about it, it could be far worse than we, the viewer, thinks it is - shows like this rarely deal in simplistic stories. However, what you think is going to be a police procedural with a few twists and turns gets very weird, especially when it becomes clear this is going to be a stand up fist fight between Capaldi and Jumbo.<p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Next Week...</span></i></b></p><p>The conclusion of <b>Criminal Record</b>, which I expect will be straightforward because nothing else in this series has been. The secret of whether we've given up on <b>Resident Alien</b> will be revealed (my guess is we won't have) and the conclusion of <b>The Big Door Prize</b>, which I am finding very good. Whatever else floats our collective boats, but I do feel we're being short changed by TV at the moment - that's us personally, I can't speak for everyone else, because everyone else tends to have dreadful taste and likes stuff we wouldn't shit on from a great height.</p><p>I have to be honest, since changing the style and look of these blogs, it does feel like a chore trying to juggle the two rather than an opportunity, so the biggest decision this week might be the one where I decide to bring back the old style blog. I mean, we've actually watched more films this week than TV, some weeks there's more TV than film and the film blog has become erratic because I want there to be a reasonable amount of content. It's just another immaterial existential crisis I don't need... </p><p><br /></p><p><br /></p><p><br /></p></div></div>Phil Hallhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12680058800847509275noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5979663737404474935.post-86957482723874509232024-02-29T12:05:00.000+00:002024-02-29T12:05:53.456+00:00Film Culture - America Unhinged<p><i>This is jam-packed with real spoilers, so if you want to watch any of these films you might want to skip this week's film-fest...</i></p><p><b><span style="font-size: x-large;"><i>Disappointing Things</i></span></b></p><p>Extraordinary film, utterly sumptuous set designs, quite phenomenal acting and a truly wrong thing that does nothing but fantasise about the exploitation of women. It's been a long time since I watched a film that simultaneously repulsed and impressed me at the same time, but <b>Poor Things</b> manages it with consummate ease.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhiZsaqnUtjYN2Bs0zr0NYMmJWRfA3wBiJ0_jZwf948KJ1oHbYPte9PFlKv7w5OWRrAlteGOQZdmcZ40dd-AYYncV5-oWVXzbxpbDz_Dp4a8rdVL7aPJVo2CuH99s9OwBxglXcX2RtiqXC5GHG4E7oipx2t3gHVRj1q5vh1OMVdCX0xbaAvXVvN_c6UG6gY" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="1013" data-original-width="1800" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhiZsaqnUtjYN2Bs0zr0NYMmJWRfA3wBiJ0_jZwf948KJ1oHbYPte9PFlKv7w5OWRrAlteGOQZdmcZ40dd-AYYncV5-oWVXzbxpbDz_Dp4a8rdVL7aPJVo2CuH99s9OwBxglXcX2RtiqXC5GHG4E7oipx2t3gHVRj1q5vh1OMVdCX0xbaAvXVvN_c6UG6gY" width="320" /></a></div>Don't get me wrong, there was much to like about this film and Emma Stone's performance was, at times, unbelievably brilliant, but there was so much that was wrong about this movie that I couldn't enjoy it. It was morally questionable, it was at worse misogynistic and at best chauvinistic and the only character that came out of it with any dignity... actually none of the characters did although Hannah Schygulla probably deserves a mention for being the least offensive. I literally wanted the film to end after about 30 minutes and I don't think it has anything to do with how prudish I have become in later life. I can get the idea that some kind of Frankenstein's monster creates his own monster and I get that that monster as she grows and matures will discover sex, but one would hope that as the character of Bella Baxter becomes more... human, her animalistic desires would become a little less frantic. This is a sexual horror story and if, like I've heard, Yorgos Lanthimos was trying to tell a story about the emancipation of a woman wronged by monsters of science then he missed the part where he shouldn't try to fill every scene with Emma Stones boobs or her vulva.<p></p><p>I think it deserves to win awards but probably for set design (I actually wrote 'sex' design in the first draught which must have been Freudian or just because the film was overloaded with it), camerawork, special effects, maybe some of the acting - Willem Dafoe and Ramy Youssef were both very good (but culpable) - but Mark Ruffalo was fucking awful, a really dislikeable character badly acted with an accent that wandered all over the shop. Was this because his Duncan Wedderburn was a fraud or was it because Ruffalo isn't good at holding an accent for more than half a dozen words? I can't say. I just thought it was about two hours too long. Yes, the females in the film might have found their own emancipation by the end of it, but they had to endure enough rough and male dominated sex to get there and that made the whole thing feel tawdry, cheap and soiled. </p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Fists of Fake Steel</span></i></b></p><p>I'm in a quandary, mainly because of spoilers. You see to tell you much about <b>The Iron Claw</b> is to pretty much give it away; however, if you're a fan of wrestling, know anything about the family, or are familiar with the fact this is a biopic (with a character cut from the adaptation for reasons I will presume later) then it won't spoil anything for you. </p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEial84gJR7D-PyOWwJTl3ulT8j0X560rqp1pNOym7Cs73vOoydBm-pSjKLQY2A-vsMwuBxMK9rzulT-f328sz2uttIpUZxzS6C7dYBlxCWovKUjGo4p3oTtKqe7U8yMP1X5HCNlbvCvGouZwzyuNYdUEznGgNMu4k2cJ3rMKPORr5bGaa06_T2qiKIC8wOH" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="540" data-original-width="960" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEial84gJR7D-PyOWwJTl3ulT8j0X560rqp1pNOym7Cs73vOoydBm-pSjKLQY2A-vsMwuBxMK9rzulT-f328sz2uttIpUZxzS6C7dYBlxCWovKUjGo4p3oTtKqe7U8yMP1X5HCNlbvCvGouZwzyuNYdUEznGgNMu4k2cJ3rMKPORr5bGaa06_T2qiKIC8wOH" width="320" /></a></div>This is a testosterone-fuelled example of what actors can do if they work out enough for a specific part, because Zac Efron, as well as Jeremy Allen White and Harris Dickinson - all average size and shaped men - really went over the top to muscle up as three of the 'cursed' Von Erich family - a famous Texas-based wrestling family from the 80s and 90s. They helped turn wrestling into a multi-billion dollar entertainment industry from its roots of, you know, actual proper wrestling and were some of the pioneers who helped form the WWF and make it the spectacle it became, especially in the 1990s. Efron especially must have worked his balls off to get into the kind of shape - that would usually have him shoehorned into a superhero film - as the musclebound Kevin Von Erich - the surviving oldest brother who never really got the breaks his brothers got, but, in the end, probably was the best thing that could happen to him.<p></p><p>This is the story of a group of boys who were driven to extremes by their father, Felix - Holt McCallany, a determined and obsessed former wrestler whose hatred of the sport's governing body made him lose sight of everything else in his desire to see one of his boys crowned World Champion. This is a man who didn't understand what 'family' meant in his relentless pursuit of something he felt was withheld from him when he was a semi-famous wrestler in the 1960s. In the real world the Von Erichs - or the Adkisson family - was a name associated with tragedy and disaster; of Felix's six children only Kevin is still alive; three died by suicide and one from a freak electrocution, while the first world champ died from a ruptured colon in a Japanese hotel room. This might well be a huge spoiler, but it's also the entire film and doesn't really spoil it, at last not until the first death, because the rest follow pretty quickly and you can see them all coming.</p><p>Is it a good film? Well, it has the brilliant Jeremy Allen White in it, but it's really Zac Efron's film and despite looking utterly silly - musclebound with a girl's haircut - he just about pulls it off as Kevin, a man depicted as being either very naΓ―ve or maybe a little stupid. It's actually a pretty straightforward biopic, which has had a Von Erich son omitted from it - Chris - because they probably figured if you didn't know the story losing so many members of a wrestling dynasty over the space of five years might seem a bit careless; although he did blow his own brains out and that might have been the difference between a 12 and a 15 or 18 certificate. It wasn't a bad film, but equally it wasn't something I can imagine will win awards, despite its current high rating on IMDB. I'm glad I watched it, but I also feel as though it's just over 2 hours of my life that could have been spent doing something less overwrought.<br /></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Mistaken Identity</span></i></b></p><p>One thing about <b>The Hunt</b> is very clear; it's a film that doesn't try to make its audience think it's anything but a satire. There's a feeling of 'what you see is what you get' going on and it does come across as one of those cheap low budget films that has little or no redeeming factors, but actually it's quite a strange movie that actually does get you wondering at times just what you're watching.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhDjbaBx-NcZC00JeZ1842APrtzbdZrhQeMGAGcQDuKkdmJQK39vX5K2XSEdWXNEprBW4ehsnCaCfrgqAbLd3CsJ_vtAOwL9O_W3OSAlVZv9aIDVdkl8Tws_DsR5voYxjse2TY8OqQjZaX_FApGmJNXbA76z8vJ_fhEUZ2dVbOsEiU_D4Oiqw3cIz9dC3im" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="315" data-original-width="474" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhDjbaBx-NcZC00JeZ1842APrtzbdZrhQeMGAGcQDuKkdmJQK39vX5K2XSEdWXNEprBW4ehsnCaCfrgqAbLd3CsJ_vtAOwL9O_W3OSAlVZv9aIDVdkl8Tws_DsR5voYxjse2TY8OqQjZaX_FApGmJNXbA76z8vJ_fhEUZ2dVbOsEiU_D4Oiqw3cIz9dC3im" width="320" /></a></div>Betty Gilpin - the star - doesn't actually make an appearance until about the 15 minute mark; I'm sure she's there in the background of the opening scenes, but the camera is focusing on two others, who you immediately think are going to be the people this film follows. They are two of 12 people who are gagged and dumped in a field with a large box full of weapons; once the gags are all off someone starts opening fire on them, killing almost half of them in that opening ten minutes. Three get away and over a fence and find their way to a gas station where they essentially walk into a trap and then Betty arrives and from that point on the film takes an altogether different direction. You see the 12 people picked to die have all been identified as right wing conspiracy theorists who said some mean things about some rich woke people - based on a flippant joke made by one of them. The rich bitch running this slaughterhouse - Hilary Swank - makes a joke about hunting right wing wankers at the weekend at her mansion in Vermont and people start to actually believe that is exactly what she and her friends are doing, so they decide to rent part of Croatia and actually hunt these 12 people into extinction.<br /><p></p><p>The problem is Gilpin's Crystal <i>isn't</i> the right Crystal; instead of kidnapping some ignorant red neck, they mistakenly kidnap a former US special forces operative who is very good with her hands and guns and that's when this short but entertaining satire really takes off. Apparently Donald Trump didn't like this film, but I think that was just a Blumhouse marketing ploy - or maybe he didn't like the fact that left and right wing Americans are depicted as complete and utter wankers who all deserve the die? It was co-written by Damon Lindelof - usually a good mark of quality IMHO and while I think the wife couldn't quite get into it, I thought it was actually a clever little piss take on culture wars, the internet and people who use social media as a platform to spout their individualistic bullshit.</p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Not A Fast Dog</span></i></b></p><p>I suppose the most accurate thing to say about this week's Tom Hanks film [have you noticed that since I changed the format of these there's been a Tom Hanks film every column?] is that it's a film about naval warfare. <b>Greyhound</b> is set in 1942, in the mid-Atlantic, just after the USA had been dragged into WW2. Hanks plays a newly promoted naval captain in charge of the eponymous Greyhound - a small warship charged with looking after a convoy of supply ships from Nazi U-boats.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiFc01WtixPl-JhtddJdueRzZYrGR7GfaXoV5XZ47d02N6v9RvIbiBXeZfThbRhdyWY8xaGsyaY9bTLEQIDHRMHPeZp5xHsXNNsAIUgpq1vB0OmaleDFwLN15wzqj70YGRAXoZHVaNY_KVBYS4hrx4c_zQgklb6IyVyFG-EIcXntkMn8ki3S1pmcFl0S6HV" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="1080" data-original-width="1920" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiFc01WtixPl-JhtddJdueRzZYrGR7GfaXoV5XZ47d02N6v9RvIbiBXeZfThbRhdyWY8xaGsyaY9bTLEQIDHRMHPeZp5xHsXNNsAIUgpq1vB0OmaleDFwLN15wzqj70YGRAXoZHVaNY_KVBYS4hrx4c_zQgklb6IyVyFG-EIcXntkMn8ki3S1pmcFl0S6HV" width="320" /></a></div>Also starring Stephen Graham, as Hanks's #2, this really is just a war film and it's not really about anything else. You see back in the war, there was an area in the mid-Atlantic called the Pit, which was essentially too far out for the US Air Force to give protection and not close enough to the British Isles to get any from this side either - a kind of black hole where the supply convoys and the ships deemed to protect them were on their own. Hanks's captain has his first command, he's in charge of a crew made up mainly of very young men and he has had no sleep and not eaten anything for 72 hours, yet he has to think on his feet and try and protect his crew and everyone else in the convoy and that is the film. It's set over the space of 48 hours - the time the convoy is in this red zone - and it's split into sections where they engage the enemy. If it wasn't set on a ship in the ocean you'd almost think it was a play, but that is maybe the thing about it; the fact they're sitting in a huge ocean in extreme weather, but they could just as well be in a small box. It's a very procedural drama; probably extremely similar to what this would have been like in real life. If you like war films then I'd highly recommend it; if you like Tom Hanks it's a bit of a completists film, but in general at a tad over 90 minutes it isn't a bad way to spend an hour and a half.<br /><p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Flabtastic Four</span></i></b></p><p>In anticipation of 2025's <b>Fantastic Four</b> (Hah!), I decided to watch <b>Doomed: The Untold Story of Roger Corman's Fantastic Four</b> and the weird thing is I remember the actual film being made because I was news editor at Comics International at the time and was in San Diego in 1993 when we were hearing all kinds of awful things about it.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEj2aalkBbI1WFoWtOLtxNl96cdpdzt9RDZEruxLosAziaSq_wrW5qgd8Kp9tuKfuMI1VWo9xn6cO8lgnLfzsEqFx4b7MnteWCBu03Dpgoq-vgZ6QJ-8S6_PRFQq21maVkQQYdbBGQlkEYIvuJ7C_mz7Np2ZCwrhm6sKQ9Ll90O9H1-543RpwMELNTGJAcjR" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="540" data-original-width="960" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEj2aalkBbI1WFoWtOLtxNl96cdpdzt9RDZEruxLosAziaSq_wrW5qgd8Kp9tuKfuMI1VWo9xn6cO8lgnLfzsEqFx4b7MnteWCBu03Dpgoq-vgZ6QJ-8S6_PRFQq21maVkQQYdbBGQlkEYIvuJ7C_mz7Np2ZCwrhm6sKQ9Ll90O9H1-543RpwMELNTGJAcjR" width="320" /></a></div>The documentary of the making of the film is almost as trashy as the actual film because the people involved in the movie had been brought back (in 2015) to talk about it and some of them were sanguine, some of them were self-deprecating and some of them were absolute fucking bonkers, specifically Alex Hyde-White and Joseph Culp (both sons of actual famous actors), although Hyde-White takes the biscuit because he's transmitting from la-la-land with a tin foil hat on. The thing about some of the people interviewed here is that they are clearly in absolute denial despite the fact that by the time it was finished it was more like a badly made fan-made adaptation. Then there's the bone of contention - was this film ever made for a release or was it made for some other reason? Was it essentially a contractual obligation to try and get the film rights retained or maybe sold to someone else, which considering Roger Corman received a cheque for a million dollars for pulling it is probably exactly why it was never going to be an actual film. If you listen to Hyde-White you'd think he was talking about a multi-million dollar Steven Spielberg film mixed with the plot of a Mission: Impossible about how 'barnstormers in blue suits were trying to steal the project'. Culp, who sometimes liked the film and sometimes hated it, depending on what part of the interview you watched, really comes out of this as some kind of 'Do you know who I am?' kind of guy, because, his dad, Robert Culp was somebody.<br /><p></p><p>One thing is sure, there were some pretty enthusiastic people on this film who really wanted the movie to be a success and sound genuinely sad that it never came out. The point here is if you've never seen it, there are clips in the documentary and it was more amateurish than a bad episode of Mighty Morphin Power Rangers; it's a truly awful film that a bunch of people who have never been in a decent film in their lives try desperately to tell us that despite what we might see this really was a brilliant and underrated movie. The film's director Oley Sassone takes the prize for being the most deluded because he really thinks he did a good job and people are being deprived for not being able to watch it. But hey, all these people <i>wanted</i> to be famous actors or filmmakers and none of them did because none of them were any fucking good at what they did. </p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Dazed...</span></i></b></p><p>The film <b>Monolith</b> got a really good write up in that paper I dislike. They claimed it was on a similar level to <b>Arrival</b>, which I absolutely loved. However, it was clearly a film made during lockdown; it was a single hander, with every other actor other than the lead on the telephone or in videos. It was about a mysterious black brick or monolith that turns up in people's lives and the woman who has a podcast that begins to look into this odd phenomena.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhWimJcmgYHdwi8y7Zv-Rme8Ubfr041flmJJV23fKMZi_-NKeCLBOYQ5CZuJa3OVO9cput4HUf-7cmYjku7VRBTW8L3vnECWYFEunFRHLnOr2ZcGXfYA0kMZCTpAsm5zMuuZgridIEmhMoZ0Zjqlx3o4z9DV6Gw0M-4o1s4aYzSDvmxr_D2C-by7cmFCOU0" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="1668" data-original-width="2500" height="214" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhWimJcmgYHdwi8y7Zv-Rme8Ubfr041flmJJV23fKMZi_-NKeCLBOYQ5CZuJa3OVO9cput4HUf-7cmYjku7VRBTW8L3vnECWYFEunFRHLnOr2ZcGXfYA0kMZCTpAsm5zMuuZgridIEmhMoZ0Zjqlx3o4z9DV6Gw0M-4o1s4aYzSDvmxr_D2C-by7cmFCOU0" width="320" /></a></div>It become quite clear from out outset that this would be a cheaply made movie with virtually all the action taking place in the journalist's studio; to cut up the monotony, there are shots of her equipment, the outside and assorted stuff floating [not literally] around the house. The journalist receives an anonymous email telling her to contact a woman about her 'brick' and it lurches forward from there until she and us begin to realise there's something odd going on and the journalist has more to do with this than she suspected. In many ways this is more like <b>Annihilation</b> than anything else, but without the inherent oddness and in the end we finished the film and wondered what the actual fuck we'd just wasted 90 minutes of our lives on. There might be a neat little twist in this - it might be aliens (it probably is), but frankly by the time you find out what it is you don't give a flying fuck. <b>Pretentious Wank</b> would have been a much better title.<p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">... And Confused</span></i></b></p><p>Considering <b>Monolith</b> has an IMDB rating of 6.1 (now) and the film we watched straight after it has a rating of 4.8 (now) - it was 8 when we watched it and then plummeted like a stone - it makes me wonder if I should take any notice whatsoever of what other people think. I became aware of this movie - <b>Lovely, Dark and Deep</b> from my mate Chris, who doesn't have a good batting average with his recommendations. He posted a trailer up and I was intrigued, so we watched it...</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhmFKoNVIbTUYwVz3xnaw5ONS-wJKglhsUwaraeU6PMO5J6LUmRDTMmPS-7DUXSnh1BB0AyCOTPHpamjmNFRDi4YWsJvaKYsn3zPVw6uM-RwpYX3kcnOHP9yv9hHTyNtFTuffkMsrpC7Wmfqf2EKbcb5QFQ8GwloEO8eikKVLn-PANtD6NoT7MPjGcbD5vC" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="281" data-original-width="500" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhmFKoNVIbTUYwVz3xnaw5ONS-wJKglhsUwaraeU6PMO5J6LUmRDTMmPS-7DUXSnh1BB0AyCOTPHpamjmNFRDi4YWsJvaKYsn3zPVw6uM-RwpYX3kcnOHP9yv9hHTyNtFTuffkMsrpC7Wmfqf2EKbcb5QFQ8GwloEO8eikKVLn-PANtD6NoT7MPjGcbD5vC" width="320" /></a></div>A couple of immediate observations: it isn't a good film, but it also doesn't deserve a 4.8 rating. Movies that get under 5 are usually badly made amateurish rubbish with little or no redeeming qualities; this is a well made film but is painfully slow - and for a 90 minute feature that's not a good thing - and it's not really that scary despite being a horror set in the woods with a sense of eeriness. <p></p><p>Georgina Campbell plays Lennon, a newly appointed park ranger who is carrying a troubled and guilty past because her sister went missing in the same woods she's now working in 20 years earlier. It's never made clear, but you get the feeling Lennon is looking for answers and the first 40 minutes of the film pan out more like a natural history documentary, but then things get slightly weird; a girl goes missing, her partner alerts Lennon who then informs HQ, who despatch other rangers and a helicopter. It is here that the first strange thing happens; she's told by Jackson (Nick Blood), the guy co-ordinating the search that she has to stay put at the mobile ground HQ. Lennon doesn't like this so ignores her instructions and goes off on her own to find the girl, which she does - huzzah. </p><p>Cue the second bit of weirdness; none of the rangers are happy this has happened, they seemed pissed off that the girl was found. The head ranger makes it clear that Lennon's ranger career is finished and she was going home. Lennon asks Jackson what she did wrong because she found the girl and Jackson tells her it's because she found the girl. This is where and when it starts to try and get scary.</p><p>The more I thought about the movie, the more I realised that these two bits of dialogue explain everything that is going on and going to happen and how her fellow rangers are more than aware that Lennon has already experienced tragedy in that forest, so when Lennon gets swept into a nightmare that doesn't appear to make any sense, the viewer is completely non-plussed, mainly because there's very little that's scary or creepy in a supposedly scary and creepy horror movie. But the next 25 minutes is odd but in a quite boring way until, at the end of her tether, she meets the head ranger and asks 'are you real?' She says she is and the next thing is Lennon emerging out of the middle of the lake, gasping for breath and is rescued by Jackson.</p><p>The following year, she's back as a ranger again. Jackson is now in charge and the head ranger's missing poster is prominent around the HQ. A week or so into her three month stint there's news of a missing hiker; they all mobilise to find him and Lennon literally stumbles upon him. "Are you real?" He asks and she pauses and then says "No." and walks away. End of film. I can see why people disliked it because it wasn't a horror film and it wasn't scary, but the more I thought about it the more I realised that the opening scene with a sheet of paper with 'The forest demands a body' written on it is what the entire film is about - whatever malevolent spirit lives there demands a sacrifice and if you save the chosen sacrifice you become it and the head ranger saved Lennon by removing the curse from her and Lennon faced with the same choice again chose not to. I'm telling you all of this - spoiling it - because you really don't want to watch it; it's a fucking awfully written film with no pacing and no scares. It's boring, but it does have a clever story that is almost hidden away and lost because of the nonsense around it. Read this review, don't watch the film. This has been a public service announcement. </p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Little Things</span></i></b></p><p>It dawned on us recently that of all the films in the MCI - prior to 2022 - there was one we'd only seen once, so we remedied that this week. Some fun entertainment to make up for the fact that both the wife and I have suffered badly from the norovirus and needed something as frivolous as an <b>Ant-Man</b>.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhJyJTYzuBDCaggM6-yhVDKGziNsJnWCOFiAyG9dcqpgRE61bXZRoLC4DBCprlijPP0lFjLGXWqCqNSdAfgKZpbgbF13J5kS8gJ4NpmHzAX_eje4nB0yDyAIEt0AgRyCrdQmdO1ALwzQtTx5WYn7gs3k6t8s9GlCBMP4VVRCzgZtIguQPpE_lFGdecj3uJy" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="2667" data-original-width="4000" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhJyJTYzuBDCaggM6-yhVDKGziNsJnWCOFiAyG9dcqpgRE61bXZRoLC4DBCprlijPP0lFjLGXWqCqNSdAfgKZpbgbF13J5kS8gJ4NpmHzAX_eje4nB0yDyAIEt0AgRyCrdQmdO1ALwzQtTx5WYn7gs3k6t8s9GlCBMP4VVRCzgZtIguQPpE_lFGdecj3uJy" width="320" /></a></div>I cannot remember my original review of this, there may never have been one and when I did my entire MCU review a few years ago we omitted this because... well probably because we weren't terribly impressed. I don't really understand why to be honest, it's a slight but extremely fun film and considerably better than anything Disney/Marvel have done after <b>Infinity War</b>. It has the right balance of humour over villainy and it sets up Scott Lang well and does a neat trick of tying up Hank Pym's Yellowjacket persona without destroying the 1960s revamp of Ant/Giant-Man too much or badly. There's stuff in it I take issue with but that's more to do with the movie rather than riding roughshod over Marvel history. Paul Rudd makes a half decent Ant-Man and while I've never been a huge fan of Evangeline Lily - I seem to recall having the biggest issue with her first time around, but then again I ... ahem ... lost so much of my life watching <b>Lost</b> I can understand that - she isn't too bad in this. It's a fun film with a simple message and a bit of a switch in direction for the average MCU movie. Yellowjacket reminded me a lot of the new looked <b>Blue Beetle</b> film from DC, which was a dreadful film compared to this and probably explains why new superhero films are destined to all be shit.<br /><p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">From the Archives</span></i></b></p><p>As mentioned above, this week has been all about sickness and poo, except to call it poo would be a stretch, but we don't have to go there, although I'm sure many of you have been there yourselves... So, trapped in the lounge while the kitchen is rebuilt, I decided to watch a couple of old films that I hadn't seen for a long time. These films were: <b>Journey to the Centre of the Earth</b> made in 1958 and starring James Mason and Pat Boone. And <b>The Towering Inferno</b> made in 1974 with more famous actors than you can vomit out in 60 seconds, but primarily Newman and McQueen.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjiaJN-OJiGayjZjvQ4RKzvRQaj6XztCkk7FWJ9OC_g6cn-9X6KUGxDC1HbFTxi-vzQMKTuuQwl_ORm2AJGAImQPryevzPKbjoVyUbRosoa3z-mcebfejwwcYQTAHv8CTr7PnkmNczcpQqFz0nEFv9z_Q6s_iw6VJfn_WN1A4fGAqQ6kZ7go2IpW2n9ecvA" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="617" data-original-width="1440" height="137" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjiaJN-OJiGayjZjvQ4RKzvRQaj6XztCkk7FWJ9OC_g6cn-9X6KUGxDC1HbFTxi-vzQMKTuuQwl_ORm2AJGAImQPryevzPKbjoVyUbRosoa3z-mcebfejwwcYQTAHv8CTr7PnkmNczcpQqFz0nEFv9z_Q6s_iw6VJfn_WN1A4fGAqQ6kZ7go2IpW2n9ecvA" width="320" /></a></div><b>Journey</b> pretended to be a Scottish film with Mason and Boone both putting on relatively slight Scottish accents and pretending they were scholars from Edinburgh. It was an unbelievably unbelievable tale that simply made little or no sense and displayed a tonal nature that makes some recent MCU films seem positively sensitive. Add to this the iguanas with fins pasted to their backs, the salamanders made giant by macro camera work and the giant (papier machete) macrolepiota procera (Parasol mushrooms) and you have something that was probably state of the art in 1959 but now looks like a 1970s episode of Dr Who with less care and attention. The denouement is still one of the most extraordinary things ever - four people are saved from the dyed red porridge masquerading as lava by a giant asbestos disc that they ride out of a volcano and land without even a burn in the Mediterranean. The only injury was caused by Boone falling out of a tree in Italy - which is even more surprising as he seemed fine when he picked up a lamb to cover his modesty from a group of nuns and then ran off... To call it bollocks would be wasting eight letters. <br /><p></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhPKhHiMY36I_XBMxz3A3epYkgwd5PF9kqryAbjUrh0ynO92TwOEV4Dj7FxCj6beZOJTLyQIuDI-KLw7fzInF_rPwlalaLNcZqfa-PY5cmWkOqeklrg-AzrxqDd_YV6NSUASuCSPGn_RyxM_WRS3DpW0T_yhLivxd56nLjfnYpjMD3DQpE_CxyAwafeLEK1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="1165" data-original-width="1309" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhPKhHiMY36I_XBMxz3A3epYkgwd5PF9kqryAbjUrh0ynO92TwOEV4Dj7FxCj6beZOJTLyQIuDI-KLw7fzInF_rPwlalaLNcZqfa-PY5cmWkOqeklrg-AzrxqDd_YV6NSUASuCSPGn_RyxM_WRS3DpW0T_yhLivxd56nLjfnYpjMD3DQpE_CxyAwafeLEK1" width="270" /></a></div><b>The Towering Inferno</b> is a classic, although a classic of what I'm not sure. It had profoundly poor special effects, pantomime wankers dressed up as villains, stereotypes, OJ Simpson, sexism and inventive ways to die that didn't involve flames or smoke inhalation. Steve McQueen looks like he phones in his role as the fire chief - who literally does EVERYTHING - and Paul Newman is the architect who does everything else, the rest of the cast is just window dressing and one wonders why the hell Robert Wagner was even in it as he did nothing but die. It's on for two hours and 46 minutes and goes nowhere really slowly and considering the fire starts in the first five minutes, it's the Jaws-esque refusal to accept lives might be in danger that is the most remarkable - "we're on the top floor, the fire can't possibly reach us!" It was at this point McQueen and Newman should have just left these people to be barbecued and gone and sat in a bar. There was also the slap-dash and haphazard way orders are given and were be carried out - untrained people risking their lives trying to rescue people while actual firefighters stand around and let these people enter into hell. It's enormous fun if you're a 12 year old Phil, but the 61 year old me just wanted it to end. Nostalgia ain't what it used to be, isn't it.<div><p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Next Time...</span></i></b></p><p>Who cares? The best thing I've watched over the last ten days was a nine year old MCU film and a rather dull WW2 movie. No wonder we struggle to watch things on the Flash Drive of Doom if new films leave me cold and old films are pretty much a waste of my time, again. I'm not sure who claimed that 2024 could be the greatest year in film history, but I think they were paid a lot of money by someone to say this. I've seen one film released/been made available in 2024 that I think is good - <b>American Fiction</b> and even that had a bit of a disappointing ending. When I did my film and TV blogs there was always the chance that something from either genre would shine through the utter disappointment I feel sometimes about the state of the entertainment industry. I truly believe that peoples standards have just dropped to a level where adequate is the new fantastic...</p></div>Phil Hallhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12680058800847509275noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5979663737404474935.post-1941486275795055152024-02-24T13:47:00.002+00:002024-02-24T13:47:53.098+00:00TV Culture - General Poor Quality or Major Wank<p><i>Spoilers</i></p><p><i><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">The Slapstick Years</span></b></i></p><p>The thing about <b>Resident Alien</b> that bugs me was almost answered in one of Harry's closing monologues - yet another thing about this load of wank that grates on me. He was theorising how pretending to be human has made him less smart and that's certainly the impression anyone who watches this must get from Alan Tudyk's performance. He's become stupidly moronic while the rest of the cast seem to now exist in a world where being either an arsehole or a fuckwit is the norm...</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiTO318uAe4PYzDi-an1Gw6YNUqqIlqVDb7a4_fGHygf_NqFksvYZRTvSip4iWD7VfNJMEs0Hxqrl8qf8-Vd3xKwpJP_oteVhwKlUKepGHQz5s4FHglBAHKhI-2i8SdPy-aH6VJ-EP3AjZur1L7pBVXK3e3_fXZuEDfc5V96eUqADCMRnF9NgfDNlFW4_ao" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="321" data-original-width="474" height="217" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiTO318uAe4PYzDi-an1Gw6YNUqqIlqVDb7a4_fGHygf_NqFksvYZRTvSip4iWD7VfNJMEs0Hxqrl8qf8-Vd3xKwpJP_oteVhwKlUKepGHQz5s4FHglBAHKhI-2i8SdPy-aH6VJ-EP3AjZur1L7pBVXK3e3_fXZuEDfc5V96eUqADCMRnF9NgfDNlFW4_ao" width="320" /></a></div>The Grey hybrid story was wrapped up quicker than liquidising an idiot in a large blender; in fact it made you wonder what the fucking point was of having it there in the first place was. Enver Gjokaj's fleeting guest appearance ended in an imaginary fight scene where both aliens imagined how their fight would be like, which in a way was almost amusing, apart from the fact they're supposed to be highly intelligent beings able to travel to earth from their planets but instead come across as morons in a twat contest.<p></p><p>The little Muslim girl has quit the show; I don't know if this was a parental decision but she's been replaced by two of Max's school friends and the sexually weird Judy seems to have become a major character in the show; which suggests to me that the writers are still struggling to come up with anything that resembles a coherent story or plot line. Anyhow, the wife told me to turn it off after five minutes, but I refused, I feel that in a week that has yielded such low quality TV, I have to have something that I can really sink my teeth into and <b>Resident Alien</b> is very much that mouldy burger. Next week there's a new subplot, which is likely to be as lame as the current ones. I only watch this because Asta has the largest backside in television and her friend D'Arcy is one of the least attractive red heads I've ever laid my eyes on and God that sounds so sexist, possibly even misogynistic, but no one in this TV show comes away with anything like any praise; it's like an ugly actors convention with poor scripts and no budget. Still, mercifully, only six more episodes to go. </p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Love & Marriage</span></i></b></p><p>My mate Chris will be pleased to know that we watched <b>Mr & Mrs Smith</b> this week; he will also be delighted to know that we didn't give up on it, despite having reservations. In fact, there was enough in the opening episode to keep us watching until the end. It was a little cold and like my other friend Kelvin suggested, also something a little ... icky... but it wasn't too offensive and it was quite enjoyable.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgYxNkXtkaNQuSaa_fFv3Bx5fzAS_akRz_uRx0wRM_EbQ00m7DPx_nfVa08Nvxg9J_yOTbrwcw-wR646VSlh8NztJNmbQxkVmVXfghCI28rqKN3cNL10MvbXBUsqYDaMJx7E_pszG9BXHnIXGMqDR8VKjF_bwpSbLUNwzW48SvZx2S0OX4VDGMoVu6iBUK2" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="900" data-original-width="1600" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgYxNkXtkaNQuSaa_fFv3Bx5fzAS_akRz_uRx0wRM_EbQ00m7DPx_nfVa08Nvxg9J_yOTbrwcw-wR646VSlh8NztJNmbQxkVmVXfghCI28rqKN3cNL10MvbXBUsqYDaMJx7E_pszG9BXHnIXGMqDR8VKjF_bwpSbLUNwzW48SvZx2S0OX4VDGMoVu6iBUK2" width="320" /></a></div>It stars Donald Glover and Maya Erskine as two 'agents' recruited by a 'company' to pose as man and wife while undertaking specific jobs for them; these jobs are an assortment, but mainly involving the loss of life with a proviso that the posing couple can get away from the scene of the carnage fast enough and with as little damage as possible; maybe some spying and general espionage. at least that's what the first few episodes ended up being like, as we were introduced to and then slowly got to know John and Jane Smith. He's quite affable, while she's a little bit of a cold fish. [Ahem] The Guardian praises the couple's chemistry and ranks it so highly you can hear jizzum pumping from their collective throbbing gristle. Their chemistry is the kind you'd expect from two lead actors playing people in a forced relationship. <div><p></p><p><span>My mate Kelvin described this </span>show as "...Nothing overtly offensive about it, but it felt sticky and nasty for reasons I can't identify." And I totally get that because there is something slightly... tonally wrong about this; like both these characters have a nasty and secretive stain on them that they don't really want anyone else to know about but they kind of also want to brag about it. I'm finding Maya Erskine's character the colder of the two at the moment, because Glover's John seems almost too nice to be doing the job he is, whereas she's got that 'I could easily be a serial killer' vibe going on. The weird thing is as the two spend more time with each other they become more attracted to each other, which is strange because... you know... I don't know if I would be. As the series moves on towards the finale, there is a distinct surreality about it, especially when they meet another Mr & Mrs Smith, or when Ron Perlman turns up as, essentially, a giant man baby. </p><p>The theme of it is actually the perceived cycle of a marriage/relationship - from the first meeting, through the loved up period, to the doubts and then the therapy before the inevitable split; conceptually it's a clever idea, but I recently described this show as 'not wanting to have anyone associated with it in my house unless I've got an armed guard,' because there is something definitely <i>wrong</i> about it all and not in a good or fun way and that isn't how most relationships are, even in the USA. One thing is pretty much certain, I doubt there will be a second season. </p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Friendless in the Cold of Night</span></i></b></p><p>The 'thing' that led to the scientists dying in <b>True Detective: Night Country</b> was fucking inspired; I don't think anyone watching this would have seen it coming. Quite how it happened is a different point entirely, because this was a mini-series that made me want to swear a lot, shout and generally find out which cunt I could sue to try and get six hours of my fucking life back...</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjBDhDlY3BWZznqbiOy0dK5e6n5KydKg3effmBF0K-yRipezZLVKtKIfMO3lfAvvMvDDP_e1E8BDJVqXTvBASnCHEmf-RQtHMHovvjE6xrfbqEPHv-sVsnqN2M_j_oUg6f7F33jaYgQzskS_EjOP9jMJkth9NN00GmGVaTf4xHwkjLJUY6nO-rZosLp72y3" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="570" data-original-width="855" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjBDhDlY3BWZznqbiOy0dK5e6n5KydKg3effmBF0K-yRipezZLVKtKIfMO3lfAvvMvDDP_e1E8BDJVqXTvBASnCHEmf-RQtHMHovvjE6xrfbqEPHv-sVsnqN2M_j_oUg6f7F33jaYgQzskS_EjOP9jMJkth9NN00GmGVaTf4xHwkjLJUY6nO-rZosLp72y3" width="320" /></a></div>Whoever wrote this heap of shite should never work in film or TV again because there was an hour long play here that was stretched out across six parts with so much padding and hinted at bullshit that by the time revelations happened no one in this house had the fucking will to live. Just what did we just watch? I ask that because SO MUCH of it was just there; no explanation; no reason; no history; no fucking nothing - 'oh let's put these bits in now' kind of plotting. If you're going to have major revelations about a primary character's life or history, at least treat the viewer with enough fucking respect to actually mention the revelation or put some groundwork down - don't just take it for granted that the viewer will be able to extrapolate some oblique fucking flashback with something that is both simultaneously important and unimportant. Just why was any of the shite thrown in about Danvers or Evangeline even there? It's not like it added to the story; it just obfuscated and confused. <p></p><p>There was even a subplot that we didn't even know was a thing; something that had been so obliquely hinted at that when it was revealed we looked at each other and went 'what the fuck?' There was all kinds of Alaskan mumbo-fucking-jumbo going on that you needed a scorecard to understand what was happening and in the end they all lived happily ever after apart from the ones that didn't. This was fucking awful; it was a truly woeful bit of TV making and there was little or no redeeming features - apart from how the scientists died, which I wasn't a million miles away from (I was actually 100% right about them, I was just a touch wrong about who killed them), but even if you'd watched the first five episodes a dozen times you would have been hard pressed to even guess it correctly. If you haven't already wasted your life on this vomit of a TV show then don't be tempted. This is preposterous bollocks and shouldn't spoil television for anyone, ever. Don't watch it, you'll be very angry.</p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Ghost Writer</span></i></b></p><p>Mark Gatiss has carved a particular niche out for himself since being in <b>League of Gentleman</b>, he's either writing stories for TV or he's appearing in programmes like <b>M R James: Ghost Writer</b>, a documentary about the celebrated writer of ghostly fiction; a man who seemed to have a real knack at scaring the shit out of people long before so-called horror-meisters came along claiming or being heralded as masters of terror. James's <i>Whistle and I'll Come to You, My Lad</i> is probably one of the creepiest and scariest things I've read or seen and this hour-long special was an examination of this, his other fiction and his life.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjKlLQgB9SRGL_g9hJuScaD4DhjzHOKPFuawyINZo7oHe64HXXYnf_0XCFbiOZ6EWSTbPzB9gk8AgVmNaH5ejIJUOTzspKbTjcHSB7L22fLnc-zmWR1wrHps84dL7z6OuLd71HKVpXvBmYkkUxMTNoi77jW9QBrw-JTD-10vpaAWDM82ofq8iakpuCMkeSE" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="675" data-original-width="1200" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjKlLQgB9SRGL_g9hJuScaD4DhjzHOKPFuawyINZo7oHe64HXXYnf_0XCFbiOZ6EWSTbPzB9gk8AgVmNaH5ejIJUOTzspKbTjcHSB7L22fLnc-zmWR1wrHps84dL7z6OuLd71HKVpXvBmYkkUxMTNoi77jW9QBrw-JTD-10vpaAWDM82ofq8iakpuCMkeSE" width="320" /></a></div>The thing about Monty James is he wasn't at all a spectacular man; a closet homosexual (or non-practicing as he was described) and a professional schools person, he started writing ghost stories as a form of entertainment for the club he belonged to at Eton and it took off from there, but his first love was essentially being a teacher or a provost.<br /><p></p><p>The documentary looked at his life as the son of a vicar, growing up in rural East Anglia and his (presumably) platonic relationships with various men in his life. How he went to Eton, then Oxford and then back to Eton in an employed way, where he stayed until his death in his 70s. He was an affable chap with a great fondness for people and he liked to scare the shit out of them, which he was very good at doing. The thing is, James was as dull as dishwater. His idea of a thrilling time was going cycling in remote parts of France or ... well... not a lot else really. Whereas I'm sure if they did a documentary on Stephen King there would be an entire section on his addictions, James was fond on boys and therefore this was touched on peripherally and then largely ignored. It was TV that educated but it was also TV that was simply there; sitting on BBC4 waiting for someone with an hour on their hands for something that wasn't going to exactly tax them.</p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">The Lure of Essex</span></i></b></p><p><b>The Essex Serpent</b> continued on its glacial path and it really was a strange beast. When we reached the halfway mark, I still had the impression that nothing was going to happen, except for maybe something even more tragic than we have already witnessed. What was clear was the attraction between Cora (Clare Danes) and Will (Tom Hiddleston), even though Cora had a suitor - one she seemed to get on well with but acted like it was nothing but a platonic relationship (in 1898... Yeah... right?) and Will has a wife and children, but with his wife now with TB she might not be on the scene for much longer.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjkPr59g-cmO45oJrWW8ETlSAd-ju9Z6IcSExiR3vyhSBB0F25N1tsYnbfymF_TKd790q2w8TvRYZ5DBfmx4yVq7kT5E0XSi5kYSKj4CLvMN3eYIClijUJeTosCWFU8suBbuQ5DUhTMeSkSA2JuDwLKZ01ZmACXKjdx_mIlwF_U0IwVxiZyCmgS1SthJnBd" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="975" data-original-width="1733" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjkPr59g-cmO45oJrWW8ETlSAd-ju9Z6IcSExiR3vyhSBB0F25N1tsYnbfymF_TKd790q2w8TvRYZ5DBfmx4yVq7kT5E0XSi5kYSKj4CLvMN3eYIClijUJeTosCWFU8suBbuQ5DUhTMeSkSA2JuDwLKZ01ZmACXKjdx_mIlwF_U0IwVxiZyCmgS1SthJnBd" width="320" /></a></div>The heathen Christians in the village are even more believing of this serpent, which I doubt actually exists outside of the imaginations of easily-led people, while the general mass hysteria that was there before Cora and her entourage arrived is now, seemingly, being laid at her door because of strange events at the school rooms. The Curate gets more bonkers every episode and to paraphrase Cora from an earlier episode, just why did Will Ransome go there when he could have had a much easier life and still been a vicar. The Essex people here are as thick as mince and superstitious with it, but this was a series that needed to be more than just an illicit love story, yet that's all you got - an allegory at best. <p></p><p>After being driven away from Essex, Cora falls into a deep depression because she can't have the man she wants; in fact, Cora isn't a particularly nice woman. You mistake her for a victim because of the way her husband treated her, but you start to wonder if she brought a lot of his behaviour on herself. She's selfish, deceiving and manipulative and doesn't really seem to care about anyone but herself and you wonder if the loopy curate might be right when he accused her of bringing the 'evil' to Essex; Although maybe not in a literal sense. Meanwhile Martha (Cora's communist buddy) is trying to bring change about in the slums of Limehouse but only by her would-be suitor being rich - actually that's a little unfair of the character as she is one of the few people to come out of this with anything like self-respect. </p><p>In the end we were a little stumped by what even the point was of the thing. Was the 'serpent' an allegory of Cora - the temptation in the garden of Eden, perhaps? Why was there emphasis on things that had no actual link to the story? Why do Essex people think whales are serpents? Or even why was there a story in the first place? How come every time I looked at Clare Danes with her strawberry blond wig on I kept thinking she was the spitting image of Harpo Marx? This was dull, unfulfilling and largely a waste of your time. The wife reckons the book might be better; she's welcome to it.</p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">A Soulless Mess</span></i></b></p><p>Regular readers (and I know there are some) will know that I have two specific pet peeves - The Guardian newspaper, specifically its reviews section (but absolutely not exclusively) and the station once called BBC News24. </p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjgtRUq2zJtG_mLTEUQe1g1dmU7nPJYrhc7AVRC-iiUFgWB816KKZN3z14xPJICuQMfCqNf8UVO7OJwn_df_xmecseVNtEbJSdhZMHCnrq72TRxRiR483S1X6c-SUV1eIlowv8KCgsiq7NQVz1JfmlfflK9AUddvtpBbKTUEwUnl3FEUfdJdy_WAUU4DgTF" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="266" data-original-width="474" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjgtRUq2zJtG_mLTEUQe1g1dmU7nPJYrhc7AVRC-iiUFgWB816KKZN3z14xPJICuQMfCqNf8UVO7OJwn_df_xmecseVNtEbJSdhZMHCnrq72TRxRiR483S1X6c-SUV1eIlowv8KCgsiq7NQVz1JfmlfflK9AUddvtpBbKTUEwUnl3FEUfdJdy_WAUU4DgTF" width="320" /></a></div>What was once a slick and professional news station is now this identity-less stream of poor quality presenters who literally seem like they've been dragged out of the canteen and told it's their turn to read the news today. In what, I now know, was a huge cost cutting exercise - terminating 90% of all contracted presenting and reporting employees and replacing them with new, inexperienced workers on much lower contracts - they have sold out and now give us what can only be described as 'amateur hours'. It is essentially now an extension of BBC World Service with the emphasis on 'world' and any semblance it once had to a UK news station has been reduced to little segments of 'From Around the UK' stories that you'd struggle to include on a regional news programme. It is dreadful and isn't even worth putting on when there's fuck all else on telly. Take the guy in the picture - Nicky Schiller - this is a man who I firmly believe is actually Nosferatu in a wig; with his filed to points teeth and haircut that reminds me of trousers that have had an argument with ankles (like the PM but creepier, if such a thing was possible). This is a man who exudes bon homme but you wouldn't want in a crowded room at a children's party because... you know... creepy and far too cheery.<p></p><p>This morning at 9.26am, at a point when the bulletin ends and you get the weather, one of the cleaners doubling up as presenters concluded her half hour and there was some graphics then instead of the weather you had another news presenter giving you the 'Top of the Hour' headlines, clearly from a couple of days ago. This presenter, who reads off the autocue like it's threatening her with her life, is seen quite often and one wonders if she's ticking a specific box. Talking about weather forecasts; at the weekend they tend to have a forecast in the morning, maybe one at lunchtime and subsequent slots are just repeats of earlier ones. It's dreadful and I don't think anyone talks about it so the BBC probably think everything is fine. It isn't. <br /></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Just a Load of Shit</span></i></b></p><p>I read quite a few reviews of <b>Joe Lycett Versus Sewage</b> and the general consensus was it shouldn't be down to him to make a programme like this, highlighting the plight of Britain's bottom waste disposal. I say, it shouldn't be down to him to make what ended up as essentially a quite pointless programme that could have done so much more than just trivialise shit.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEioHH76O7_Fj9LNteKpENsTq6HnKwpHRD2RS9Lp_XfqDJVDSbEWYT7BX52FQCHNVBtAHW040OsKeaOUnDY5yZ0-XhJ6pGmxpf8grDyncOeDbCnjoeyKrDzJsWxrWGSTyKL0vvSRerX3tDeFMfnYil_5ScI4BSk3curPl1wjcy4LQwd1vUwPscyOU7Z4JCe0" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="316" data-original-width="474" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEioHH76O7_Fj9LNteKpENsTq6HnKwpHRD2RS9Lp_XfqDJVDSbEWYT7BX52FQCHNVBtAHW040OsKeaOUnDY5yZ0-XhJ6pGmxpf8grDyncOeDbCnjoeyKrDzJsWxrWGSTyKL0vvSRerX3tDeFMfnYil_5ScI4BSk3curPl1wjcy4LQwd1vUwPscyOU7Z4JCe0" width="320" /></a></div>Lycett has form at this kind of thing and it's usually a good thing when a celebrity takes on a key issue, especially one about the amount of poo that is channelled into our waterways on a daily basis because there is no body with the power or inclination to fine or sanction water companies. The amount of shit in our rivers and off our coast <i><b>should</b> </i>be a National disgrace; it should be on the agenda of any political party that wants to be elected; it should disgust and anger everybody in this country regardless of their political persuasion. I mean, even if you vote Conservative you want clean rivers and seas, don't you? How does having the country swimming in its own shit benefit anyone apart from people with shares in one of the ten water companies and really, are dividends more important than safety and a place where people and indigenous animals can exist without the fear of dysentery or cholera or just general sickness from poo poisoning?<p></p><p>The problem with this documentary is it was a little like when you think, "Oh boy, I've got to have a massive shit!" You rush to the loo, pull your pants down and out comes a massive fart with no lumps. Even the stunt to try and make people angry about the poo in our rivers was pretty much seen as a stunt which, in the grand scheme of things, saw very few people react to it. This documentary wasn't a load of shit, but it did highlight the apathy suffered by people regarding the issue and the fact that the shit in your rivers is low priority for everyone from politicians to the Archbishop of Canterbury (because the Church of England invests heavily in water companies as part of its pensions portfolio). It was a pathetic plop rather than a thunderous dump and people need to start caring more about the excessive poo in our lives.</p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Next Time...</span></i></b> <br /></p><p>And thus concludes another week of weak TV. Yes, some of it was mildly okay but in general I do get the impression that I'm drawn to the rubbish because it makes better review material. There will be more of the same next weekend, I have no doubt and it now seems highly unlikely that stuff I've started watching in previous weeks will be returned to, so if you wanted to know what I thought of certain things... tough, it ain't going to happen.</p><p>What I can tell you is <b>Constellation</b> will be on the list of things to watch, while some other stuff mentioned last week will be delved into now that <b>Mr & Mrs Smith</b> has been removed from the Flash Drive of Doom. It says something when a show I didn't want to watch and can't say I was that enamoured with was the best thing I saw on telly all week. That bastion of right wing gaslighting The Guardian ran an article a couple of weeks ago suggesting that 2024 could be the greatest year for television ever - if that doesn't explain quite succinctly why I despise this rag of a newspaper then I must try harder...</p></div>Phil Hallhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12680058800847509275noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5979663737404474935.post-25412379410275504152024-02-17T09:55:00.001+00:002024-02-17T09:55:09.550+00:00Film Culture - Fantasy Rules but Reality Bites <p><i>Here's a spoiler warning, but I don't really think there are that many... GODDAMMIT ALL TO HELL!</i></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Aqua-twat 2</span></i></b></p><p>We were warned. A friend got 10 minutes into this film and gave up, saying he could not watch such an awful film with such bad CGI without wanting to put bleach in his eyes. It couldn't be <i>that</i> bad, surely? Oh, but it was. From almost the opening scene to the point where we stopped it - 17 minutes and 45 seconds - I was watching the final nails being driven into the coffin of superhero films. The genre is dead and <b>Aquatwat and the Lousy Condom</b> (or whatever they deemed to call it) has fucked its lifeless stinking corpse.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiXWANfgC1yxyA1239mAJSxoNXuQyqJP1Qs6NJNx3XidIim_GdeSfrpAafkO_1dI0NaQ6uMgPGJrxHsB2U76N-_z_2d17bNX1IpghcjsaYTLlu3atv-ThPvAqW9T3BGHmFnv7SumAUBtl6qySWE0agWiZi6D5_8D0EcCnCC-mVGraw0_evLpEEf8yrLztw6" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="266" data-original-width="474" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiXWANfgC1yxyA1239mAJSxoNXuQyqJP1Qs6NJNx3XidIim_GdeSfrpAafkO_1dI0NaQ6uMgPGJrxHsB2U76N-_z_2d17bNX1IpghcjsaYTLlu3atv-ThPvAqW9T3BGHmFnv7SumAUBtl6qySWE0agWiZi6D5_8D0EcCnCC-mVGraw0_evLpEEf8yrLztw6" width="320" /></a></div>I don't really know what to say and anyone who reads these will know that's a rare, almost unheard of, thing. But this was a joke... Wasn't it? I mean from the giant CGI sea horse to the baby pissing in Jason Mamoa's mouth, it was just a fucking huge [ahem] piss take? I cannot believe that Warner's dumped an entire Batgirl film and kept this massive dollop of shark shit on the schedules and then released it! That Batgirl film must have been utter bat shit... I mean, they want James Gunn's reboot to work, don't they? They want the new line of DC superhero films to have a fighting chance? So why inflict this on a suspecting public in the knowledge that another pile of unsavoury wank is more likely to turn people off of ever going to see a superhero film ever again? The wife said after six minutes and 10 seconds, 'This is a load of shit.' She has never been more correct in her life.<p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Love, Death and Robot</span></i></b></p><p>This could equally have been called A Man, His Dog and their Robot. It's a 2021 film starring Tom Hanks, a dog called Goodyear (known mainly as 'dog') and their robot, Jeff. It's a post apocalyptic story of a computer scientist who has managed to survive the end of the world, who is eking out a living with his dog and his robots on the inside of a wind turbine. The planet has been devastated by a solar flare that has punched holes in the atmosphere, exposed the planet to temperatures as high as 150f and has high levels of solar radiation. Finch is slowly dying and he's facing oblivion either from starvation or from the effects of the radiation.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgOlFmhYLZku-J0aFNQxwrEpU9msEtrVPkpVkODwcZkGjX-rX6qfc-2UT8QGP1O30bDCwps81xlsEy6UcprV0o1zN6C3nhHHoSgf6hG2-B5PEQb4xvQs6mBb-KEHyEYUaE7t2PacUjg1PaKRbOiT_HdnLk2xcuyI3Yehx4cwYpo97xHNBIGD3aNff_Kfqdz" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="720" data-original-width="1280" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgOlFmhYLZku-J0aFNQxwrEpU9msEtrVPkpVkODwcZkGjX-rX6qfc-2UT8QGP1O30bDCwps81xlsEy6UcprV0o1zN6C3nhHHoSgf6hG2-B5PEQb4xvQs6mBb-KEHyEYUaE7t2PacUjg1PaKRbOiT_HdnLk2xcuyI3Yehx4cwYpo97xHNBIGD3aNff_Kfqdz" width="320" /></a></div>He's building a proper robot, not one of his motorised mini dumpsters that help him collect anything that might be useful. This proper robot will have, essentially, one directive - to look after the dog when Finch dies. The three of them go on a road trip when a massive storm is heading their way; projected to last 40 days and Finch has enough food for about five. It's been ten years since the apocalypse and his chances of any kind of survival are slim to nothing, but the dog is young and has to be protected and this is my kind of movie, because as long as the dog lives I'm a happy man.<br /><p></p><p>Considering it's just Hanks, a humorous robot - voiced by Callum Landrey-Jones and a dog that barks, now and then, it's a surprisingly engaging film and proves that some CGI works very well; the scenes of devastation and decay are very good and while there are elements of stretching the bounds of belief it is set in the future so you can excuse that. It's a sad film but also one full of hope and optimism. Jeff is a likeable 'child' learning every moment he exists and getting into the role he's been made for. It's an Apple film and that alone should be enough to guarantee it's got some quality. I'd recommend it. </p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">A Captive Audience</span></i></b></p><p>I only heard about the 'horror' film <b>Barbarian</b> the other day, so we decided to give it a whirl because we'd gotten 17 minutes and 45 seconds into another film and had lost the will to live... So we gave up on that and decided to watch this instead. It was one of the stranger films we've ever seen' it wasn't bad, but equally it wasn't that good either. Strangely enough, this is a film that was set in Detroit but filmed mainly in Bulgaria...</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiEli8CGRa1K5KMR0F7Fbh-hH7UVB4qqQ0V0V_oU1TWGK_e1MkxeOu3gQapVjw9dvulXvSdmlS9OZEXzO4BJsuGUOoRDriIAZLYKWVPnTOMHGwF4crLCb3es_fODOq6MoMvA2RPRo9c0hu6C5iHeHlHXP4ZsvUMBhIaVFJZQvyHBJZC7aUUca062h8TTFPQ" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="720" data-original-width="1280" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiEli8CGRa1K5KMR0F7Fbh-hH7UVB4qqQ0V0V_oU1TWGK_e1MkxeOu3gQapVjw9dvulXvSdmlS9OZEXzO4BJsuGUOoRDriIAZLYKWVPnTOMHGwF4crLCb3es_fODOq6MoMvA2RPRo9c0hu6C5iHeHlHXP4ZsvUMBhIaVFJZQvyHBJZC7aUUca062h8TTFPQ" width="320" /></a></div>A young girl hires an AirBnB, turns up at night and discovers a man is already there. They've been double booked. There's a lot of tension but essentially they agree to share the place and start to become friends. She goes off to do her thing the next morning and when she gets back she inadvertently locks herself in the cellar, discovers a hidden room and things start to get weird from there on in. The thing is they don't get weird the way you think they should. The very strange takes over and 50 minutes into the film with the two in grave danger, it cuts to sunny California and an actor is being accused of raping his co-star. He's been cancelled and needs to raise funds for lawyers, so he flies to Detroit to sell one of his properties and guess what house it is?<p></p><p>It's probably a cult classic and young people more than likely find it one of those post-modern horror tales that appeals to the TikTok generation; it was quite interesting in the way it cut back and forth from the past to the present and told two completely different stories that converged on the same house, which we had the origin of spelled out in the flashback. However, I really don't see why it was called <b>Barbarian</b>, unless it was simply a play on the definition of the word (and that didn't work). There was just something a bit too comedic about it; a little too convenient and a little too trying to mimic an era of filmmaking that probably doesn't warrant homage. It also told me one thing about Detroit, if you're a black kidnap victim who has escaped your captor, your chances of convincing the police of this are just below zero.<br /></p><p><span face="Calibri, sans-serif" style="font-size: x-large;"><b><i>Trailer Trash</i></b></span></p><p>It's called <b>Deadpool & Wolverine</b> now; none of this Deadpool 3 nonsense. This has to have a new beginning and being the third film in a trilogy isn't going to hack it for Wade Wilson's MCU debut. </p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjQiYoAqH0AevJxrD1WQnXlhxujmhdVFq1Cwxrq7C8GH6_3mgD3wJzHs_O_DM36ZJRSW6zo1pDD8MERwKpO15KHzuDLUkk0vPf2H8vYOpcZ_y3c8xbLBofTd3rJKrUi-Gway2P9jG5s2peuGTBaUX3QPuFBY54f2AVq-Pho9f_GhRA6AwWqxy4TkFRjZmcR" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="853" data-original-width="1280" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjQiYoAqH0AevJxrD1WQnXlhxujmhdVFq1Cwxrq7C8GH6_3mgD3wJzHs_O_DM36ZJRSW6zo1pDD8MERwKpO15KHzuDLUkk0vPf2H8vYOpcZ_y3c8xbLBofTd3rJKrUi-Gway2P9jG5s2peuGTBaUX3QPuFBY54f2AVq-Pho9f_GhRA6AwWqxy4TkFRjZmcR" width="320" /></a></div>So they've fiddled with the title because that is going to fool everybody and they released a trailer that is essentially all about Wade but gives you a hint of Logan at the very end; but that's because they don't want to ... spoil... the surprise for you even though his fucking name is in the title... Do I sound cynical? That's because this 'change' smacks of sales cynicism. The trailer itself is fine, apart from the bits I was bothered about, such as the TVA... actually mainly the TVA and the fact that Marvel/Disney didn't feel as though Deadpool could carry an entire movie on his own without also introducing Wolverine into the proceedings. I think this is a bad move, but I also thought changing the name of the latest (and very delayed) Captain America film because the original title might have upset someone in Israel was also a dick move.<p></p><p>Do you know something? I don't really care about this film. I'll watch it when it becomes available to download, but I was more intrigued by <b>Wicked</b> because it has the lovely Cynthia Erivo in it and <b>Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes</b>. The MCU could do gay goat porn now and I wouldn't care. </p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgJIYXYDKq4PaRkzlx1WxwWrkB49HzW171VUPzROXHLBcDMH9qj_yP_JX3SWvaYThcA69OIfTwmIIx7v-AHyK9GPDw7WFxpPJ8ckgq7yMQA3-hXFMYxfBxaWX_aD1c5sDWqrtCwh_XoIZhUv6vrMufNFLrIrsGXbaZcVtVWSgYcvL-yu6tgUGa9Fg4prMHu" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="237" data-original-width="474" height="160" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgJIYXYDKq4PaRkzlx1WxwWrkB49HzW171VUPzROXHLBcDMH9qj_yP_JX3SWvaYThcA69OIfTwmIIx7v-AHyK9GPDw7WFxpPJ8ckgq7yMQA3-hXFMYxfBxaWX_aD1c5sDWqrtCwh_XoIZhUv6vrMufNFLrIrsGXbaZcVtVWSgYcvL-yu6tgUGa9Fg4prMHu" width="320" /></a></div>However, that's not all - the latest <b>Kong x Godzilla: The New Empire</b> trailer dropped. Bearing in mind that this film hits the cinemas in less than a month, it seemed almost like an act of desperation to have this new 150 second hint, featuring more teasers from the film, more shots of Godzilla actually running; Kong with his arm brace and the killer orang-utan who is going to fuck up the world until the two baddest monsters can sort their shit out and fight for each other. It actually looks like they might be bordering on comedy here. Kong seems to get cuddlier, while Godzilla is going decidedly pink and the humans in this have obviously been paid shit loads of cash because I can't see why any of them - especially Dan Stevens - would want to destroy their careers for two monsters who are not going to do much for them apart from - as I said - raise their bank accounts. Of course I'll watch it when I can, but I can't imagine there's going to be much comparison to some of the actual good films I've seen this year so far...<p></p><p><i><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">Expletive Not Deleted</span></b></i></p><p>... And the film of the year so far goes to - <b>American Fiction</b>. What a glorious, gentle and lovely comedy about love, death, secrets, being black in the USA and snobbery. It is an absolute joy to watch; almost two hours of quite excellent filmmaking in which a number of Academy Award nominations are forthcoming and it deserves it immensely.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhKiaMwWgMb8QCmqEzERh3oozRYdYo2hj-IRShygs_CzpyJdY_M2AgNhGoxzhwEh9OHC5J-Im_plqiydvW-ZLHxd7sU6cxbnRr6CgfjpUuTnkZYcSujjC55IJxd5sk8Weum_hfy5lBHej6fqWLg6KcJyTXCkRTNwlKmTBhxg73j712d68xLhBzxCstQHLmb" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="433" data-original-width="770" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhKiaMwWgMb8QCmqEzERh3oozRYdYo2hj-IRShygs_CzpyJdY_M2AgNhGoxzhwEh9OHC5J-Im_plqiydvW-ZLHxd7sU6cxbnRr6CgfjpUuTnkZYcSujjC55IJxd5sk8Weum_hfy5lBHej6fqWLg6KcJyTXCkRTNwlKmTBhxg73j712d68xLhBzxCstQHLmb" width="320" /></a></div>Geoffrey Wright plays Monk, an academic and a highly regarded writer who simply doesn't sell books. He's excellent at writing thoughtful, erudite stuff that often gets put in the wrong areas of bookshops or is thought of as a bit high brow. He is also a massive snob, someone who doesn't really see being black as a hindrance or a problem, even when things happen to him because he is black. He comes from a close, but slightly emotionally dysfunctional family, where everyone is a doctor apart from him - "I'm a doctor of words." is how he describes himself. His sister works in a family planning centre, his brother is a recently outed cosmetic surgeon, his father was a philandering bastard who blew his own brains out in their Martha's Vineyard seafront house and his mother is suffering from the early stages of dementia; oh and his job at a university wants him to take a break because he offends too many white students by his analytical use of black language - the film starts with a very white student taking serious offense at Monk's use of the N word and his refusal to not stop using it in an English class about black fiction.<p></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjeBz_fzmDk69gJuT9Oiv0dL-jrVwXjlgqNtqJ2aj1Zf2KIAva0qhCXwoujaOta7pYcxjslMdc6MDwHq7_37X309-ex6Mjv-rQp8GDSXZQHxA0PTOUumpqmqVhIyDad82zpOfFSD9nSjpFeqTJ3hKkL1Bdk0iStBC6GLsr4l0c7GoXidrd9QIDBif78T9V5" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="237" data-original-width="474" height="160" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjeBz_fzmDk69gJuT9Oiv0dL-jrVwXjlgqNtqJ2aj1Zf2KIAva0qhCXwoujaOta7pYcxjslMdc6MDwHq7_37X309-ex6Mjv-rQp8GDSXZQHxA0PTOUumpqmqVhIyDad82zpOfFSD9nSjpFeqTJ3hKkL1Bdk0iStBC6GLsr4l0c7GoXidrd9QIDBif78T9V5" width="320" /></a></div>However, his life takes a series of unexpected turns over the space of the first 45 minutes of the film and leaves himself in a position where, initially for a joke, he writes a 'black' book, at first called <i>My Pafology</i>, but changes it to <i>Fuck</i> when things begin to get out of control. Monk's problem is it doesn't matter how good a writer he is he's becoming broke very fast; for various reasons other members of his family can't help - despite all being doctors - and yet he's having money thrown at him for the joke book he's written but doesn't really want. The problem is, as mentioned, he's a massive snob and it simply doesn't sit well with him that he has to pretend to be everything he hates about the way black people are depicted in USA life.<p></p><p>To add to the utter splendour of this movie, there's a love interest; also a housekeeper who is family in every sense of the word and another black author who has done what Monk has done but in complete seriousness for commercial reasons - allowing an excellent juxtaposition in a number of ways. This is a cracking film; it will make you laugh, it will make you think and it portrays a certain element of black society - presumably the Republican, slightly right wing element - in a way that you never see entire films dedicated to. It's also a really gentle film, something else very few black films ever seem to be. We're only into February, but I'd hazard a guess and say this will be in my top films of the year come next December. This is a highly recommended movie - don't miss out on it.<br /></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Dammit All to Hell</span></i></b></p><p><i>[All the following dialogue is SHOUTED in a theatrical way]</i></p><div><i>Dammit Peter.<br />John?<br />Dammit four times round the car park and back in for another dammit.<br />Do I get the feeling that something's on your mind, John?<br />Come on, Peter, you know what the hell I'm talking about.<br />At a guess I'd say that this had something to do with the DDL Enterprises takeover bid?<br />You know it's funny, Peter. Four years. Four hard years I've put into building up this Health Club. And now I'm supposed to stand by and let a bunch of wet-arsed college kids take it all away from me.<br />I know, John.<br />If only Marjorie hadn't left us the way she did ...</i><br /><p>Do you remember this? Maybe if I put it all in capital letters with emphasis on the SHOUTING and the OVERWROUGHT you might remember it's the first of the 'Dammit' sketches from <b>A Bit of Fry and Laurie</b>, the one where they want to put Uttoxeter BACK on the MAP!!!</p><p>I should point out now that I haven't been watching old episodes of their sketch show, I just couldn't get this and the other Dammit sketches out of my head when the wife and I took a Tardis-like trip into the past and watched the 1972 British TV movie (it was originally broadcast as a play) written by Nigel Kneale called <b>The Stone Tape</b>... Or maybe it was called <b>THE STONE TAPE!!!</b></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjJeXUv5XKv1PhR-ut3IqCTAdF7s-jhZMhIBHe5aqwlnxC9qGQeeTLMHu211GdZds2e5AS_5ODcDAnbvfB2Hv7MQFOxG-KRhlqrQJUi90Jxhq7I2BII35lP3TO3YdZ5xejz0tPU5CNJIx3m7wiDxZkax9wjMse3ZY3UsAVObf5eGeNeW7Tu3QAWuhWkl7BG" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="358" data-original-width="474" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjJeXUv5XKv1PhR-ut3IqCTAdF7s-jhZMhIBHe5aqwlnxC9qGQeeTLMHu211GdZds2e5AS_5ODcDAnbvfB2Hv7MQFOxG-KRhlqrQJUi90Jxhq7I2BII35lP3TO3YdZ5xejz0tPU5CNJIx3m7wiDxZkax9wjMse3ZY3UsAVObf5eGeNeW7Tu3QAWuhWkl7BG" width="318" /></a></div>Michael Bryant and Iain Cuthbertson could have been Peter and John from those Fry and Laurie sketches, because the first thing you realise about this 'ghost' story is HOW MUCH THEY SHOUT THEIR LINES AT EACH OTHER; LIKE SHOUTING AT EACH OTHER SIGNIFIES THAT THIS IS AN IMPORTANT THING AND THEY ARE VERY IMPORTANT PEOPLE!!! <p></p><p>I have to say that this was something that I believe scared the shit out of the 10-year-old me and watching it 51 years later it has left me with this feeling that Michael Bryant - who was one of my favourite actors in that era - was just a shouty man. HIS CHARACTER, BROCK was awful as well as a misogynistic audio scientist who decides on a whim to turn his research into ghost hunting apparatus. Don't get me wrong, the idea was BLOODY ORIGINAL, that ghosts don't exist, they're just audio or visual imprints in stored in stones - like a kind of ancient VHS attuned to individuals, but the execution was BLOODY AWFUL. Jane Asher plays, one of, Bryant's many dalliances, a shit hot computer programmer who was one of many individuals - including Michael Bates and James Cosmo - who talked in 'science' throughout the duration. None of it made an IOTA OF SENSE and they spent ages LOUDLY PUNCHING COMPUTER KEYS on the LOUDEST KEYBOARD IN EXISTENCE while the printer spewed out stuff that only A COMPUTER PROGRAMMER would UNDERSTAND, so there was NO point in discussing it. Then there was the noise experiments, which at times sounded like an impromptu concert by the Radiophonic Workshop and the ghosts, which did more than just make sounds or appear but got deep into the minds of the more sensitive members of Bryant's team.</p><p>It was DAMNED AWFUL, IT WAS HELL AND SO WAS THE FUTURISTIC WASHING MACHINE, GODDAMMIT ALL TO HELL!!! The thing is it really was unbelievably dreadful, with so much shouting I had to turn the volume down and a script that literally didn't make any sense at all - it was like they invented some gobbledegook science language to simply confuse the people watching. Half the cast was so wired I thought they might explode and the other half just looked worried and confused, like they didn't really know what they'd signed up for. It appears that the stones have had things stored in them from 7000 years ago and they're not really stored sounds or visuals, they're real and they're capable of causing death by falling and people having breakdowns. Then there was the spam, not the computer kind, but the chopped pork and ham kind and as I mentioned before THE FUTURISTIC WASHING MACHINES being made by CJ, Reginald Perrin's boss. I had to watch it, I really wish I could go back in time and warn myself NOT TO WATCH IT AGAIN, GODDAMMIT... </p></div><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Next Time...</span></i></b></p><p>I don't know and I'm thinking you don't care...</p><p><br /></p><p><br /></p><p> </p>Phil Hallhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12680058800847509275noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5979663737404474935.post-33802352108600824162024-02-17T09:42:00.001+00:002024-02-17T09:42:41.884+00:00TV Culture - Blowing Hot & Cold<p><i>The spoilers are thick in this one!</i></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">The Equaliser</span></i></b></p><p>With ten minutes left of the entire series and the wife opting for two bloody hells and me for just the single solitary one, Simon Reeve uttered his final bloody hell of this series and allowed me to draw this series 1-1. It means next time I get to go first, but knowing my luck instead of it being called something like <b>Wilderness with Simon Reeve</b> it will be called <b>Simon Reeve's Oh Bloody Hell</b>. Getting that equaliser was a high point in what was essentially one of the most dull episodes...</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgjt-hN5_IrT3Bn92daDC_4HSzH-szjeKt2ZGuEB2_691np_VN7iJFZcWzsBOaA6Ncd1aL7pft8vbjRl0mFT8gNxdJWk9F6mch4VVermXASOwheU5HsRoikg6keY2_oCNuC5Ok9jopjIDsCK3HsKopfYV2Gd6cCkOMvPnh-wuOc20sJZecya1hFKVsFIN3I" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="266" data-original-width="474" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgjt-hN5_IrT3Bn92daDC_4HSzH-szjeKt2ZGuEB2_691np_VN7iJFZcWzsBOaA6Ncd1aL7pft8vbjRl0mFT8gNxdJWk9F6mch4VVermXASOwheU5HsRoikg6keY2_oCNuC5Ok9jopjIDsCK3HsKopfYV2Gd6cCkOMvPnh-wuOc20sJZecya1hFKVsFIN3I" width="320" /></a></div>It seems strange to suggest that an episode with elephants, lions, aardwolves, kudus, giraffes, hyenas, hippos and many other fabulous wild animals should be a little on the boring side, but sadly it was. We got the message; wildernesses are in danger, there's a real threat to the ones that are left and if it isn't from climate change it's from man just fucking things up, but this time round we spent 35 minutes of the hour wandering around the Kalahari with members of an indigenous tribe hunting a bison that eventually eluded them. it was hot and sunny, but Reeve didn't wear a hat and while he's a terrifically affable bloke who seems to bond with everyone he meets, this second African excursion felt almost like a bit of a barrel scraping exercise. A series that promised much but somehow fell well short and felt a little more like a reward for years of unwavering service than anything else. Hopefully next time he'll go back to the style that has made him such essential and infectious viewing.<p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Frosty Vibes</span></i></b></p><p>The penultimate episode of <b>True Detective: Night Country</b> was just as dull as the previous three - only that first episode had any real impact and the rest of them have meandered around being as dull as dishwater trying to tell different stories in such an oblique way that at one point about 55 minutes into this penultimate part, the wife asked me if I had any idea what was going on and what they were discussing had to do with the six dead bodies found out on the ice, so long ago...</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEia6a36x6J7YQaBpnZNwxSll6E-fJboOWhRHhB26UM7H1ktZ9ZJbeMicKUA_qW0z9HiwLPIYAT7mjFtNPKhWgfvjLzVy-3lQHYgJkYe60U75qldclgtLQi4HWdCVRLCmw_NPg56UJ3K3Ne9rvWMgkvw98dIZJBsN4aVxWc7GSf1z1AQp-eur2fAJ4lwYI7D" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="640" data-original-width="960" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEia6a36x6J7YQaBpnZNwxSll6E-fJboOWhRHhB26UM7H1ktZ9ZJbeMicKUA_qW0z9HiwLPIYAT7mjFtNPKhWgfvjLzVy-3lQHYgJkYe60U75qldclgtLQi4HWdCVRLCmw_NPg56UJ3K3Ne9rvWMgkvw98dIZJBsN4aVxWc7GSf1z1AQp-eur2fAJ4lwYI7D" width="320" /></a></div>The episode kicked off with Kali Reis's Evangeline collecting the ashes of her dead sister and just wandered around touching on the subjects that seem to have been put there to obfuscate the story - the indigenous Native Alaskans, the mining company, the newly introduced drug addict, Danvers' step daughter, who we've never really understood how and why there's even a relationship there because all we know is Danvers is a bit of a bike and has been involved with most of the men in Ennis.<p></p><p>Then there's the disparity of the bits filmed in Iceland and the bits filmed in Alaska, which once you notice them start to grate like nails down a blackboard and the only saving grace is that you know there's only one part left and this fifth episode arrived early because of the Superb Owl or whatever it's called. And then just as we're losing the will to live a couple of things happen; the cops find a link between the mining company and the research station; they then discover that where Annie was filmed - possibly killed - is on mining company land and then that Chris Ecclestone's chief of police and the mining CEO - Dervla Kirwan might be in cohorts with each other as the murder investigation is shelved and the mining CEO is allowed to question Jodie Foster like she's the DA or something. Kirwan then turns up with Prior's father basically ordering him to kill the drug addict at all costs.</p><p>Yet it's the final five minutes that has more things happen in it than the previous four episodes as Prior's dad follows Danvers home to do his job and everything goes to hell in the proverbial handbasket - there's an actual action scene, with guns and exploding brains and all kinds of mayhem and it happens just at the point when I wanted to say, "Do you know, I don't give a flying fuck who did what or why, I'm done with this." As it is, next Monday we'll have a conclusion, which I still believe will implicate the dead bodies from the first episode with the death of Annie and the bonkers surviving scientist who we haven't seen since the opening five minutes of the first part. This has been a truly dreadful detective series with few redeeming features.</p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">TV Lives Matter</span></i></b></p><p>Halfway into the third series of <b>The Morning Show</b> and it feels as though the show has... not lost its way but has shifted its focus away from Alex and Bradley and onto other characters. That's not to say Alex and Bradley aren't in it, but this new series appears to be more about Corrie and Stella's attempts to save the network; new face Chris Hunter (Nicole Beharie - she off the once fab <b>Sleepy Hollow</b>) and John Hamm, as a kind of billionaire who appears to be a thoroughly decent chap rather than an uber-rich piece of shit... Or is he? </p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEh1fcjDQDciLVUtDd6mJ5DlFePY0xCIxGm0W5GbhvXJgLp6k0aYmpzRfug9jpCTLtBN7hF8lM25NlZ1BtYbbjPlSLnEg-tWCyq06Q0KRKZtkb7yn9vojWY9d5B1vRdkAsqzP6TVfK00F1Q5ZYQ0nIFLIFoHKo05tpMOuXjIUAuqMylxS1li3hzmp2f1fvS6" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="480" data-original-width="480" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEh1fcjDQDciLVUtDd6mJ5DlFePY0xCIxGm0W5GbhvXJgLp6k0aYmpzRfug9jpCTLtBN7hF8lM25NlZ1BtYbbjPlSLnEg-tWCyq06Q0KRKZtkb7yn9vojWY9d5B1vRdkAsqzP6TVfK00F1Q5ZYQ0nIFLIFoHKo05tpMOuXjIUAuqMylxS1li3hzmp2f1fvS6" width="240" /></a></div>This season has a more episodic feel and the main characters seem to be sitting on the edge looking in a lot of the time, although Alex Levy is never too far away from the centre of this. It starts with a trip into space - which Alex manages to avoid - because Corrie is serenading a billionaire to buy the network; it wanders into Black Lives Matter as Sybil the head of the board makes a racist joke at the expense of new co-anchor Chris; touches on the Ukraine war, while dealing with a hack that unleashes so much personal information that the entire production team are in danger of walking out. The thing is though, there doesn't appear to be a real firm focus - is it the billionaire? Is it the hack? Is it the financial crisis facing UBA? Is it something that hasn't even happened yet? We're two years on from the end of season two and a lot has happened, much of which has been hinted at, but little has been revealed...<p></p>It feels similar to season two, but that ratcheted up the stakes big time in its second half and there were always hints that would happen; this time around nothing particularly looks or sounds like it will have the same impact; not even the putting a freelancer's life at risk tease. Then we get an entire episode dedicated to filling in the blanks of the two year gap and an explanation to something that is exquisitely teased into making us think was about something more salacious - 'That thing that happened between us last year...' Is not what anyone watching thought it was - far from it. That flashback episode actually is the catalyst for the rest of the series; I just can't help thinking it should have arrived earlier in the schedule. <div><div><p></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhnKJdMuEyavuOU3X0sOtaY-pygoe2h60Aj5-SlAXJl5dbkbF3mmvmAhWSndI9vOUAG_FoxfUOJvQVgKty21zzgMYSnpVZK7lDihm8lmZ8Tu27B0pIoiY3xpPR4K3Eb82-Pr--PVf3vOP3Urt9Z4qqlyZTFnHl62AQ-frhMwk-HvsI1Ud1IRCfy93CBT-ny" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="675" data-original-width="1200" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhnKJdMuEyavuOU3X0sOtaY-pygoe2h60Aj5-SlAXJl5dbkbF3mmvmAhWSndI9vOUAG_FoxfUOJvQVgKty21zzgMYSnpVZK7lDihm8lmZ8Tu27B0pIoiY3xpPR4K3Eb82-Pr--PVf3vOP3Urt9Z4qqlyZTFnHl62AQ-frhMwk-HvsI1Ud1IRCfy93CBT-ny" width="320" /></a></div>The last few episodes though tie everything together - the events on January 6; the hack and why it happened, the little things that you thought inconsequential that suddenly looked very choreographed and done for nefarious reasons and Corrie takes centre stage as the takeover gets into full swing. The doubts thrown into the mix as truths are uncovered and conspiracies are revealed and we begin to realise that nothing is what it seems. It's a bit contrived in places; one of the big giveaways is really a stupid move especially by a character who wouldn't be where they are by making silly mistakes and there's the weird situation where one of the most desperate and loved-up characters does a very odd about face, based on an integrity they had never shown before. The finale is really the most cliffhanger-y ending so far without even feeling remotely like a cliffhanger. However when this series comes back you have no idea if it will even look the same, because those cliffhanger events are that important.<p></p><p>This series concluded less than four months ago and it will be at least 18 months before season four hits our screens. It has been such a fixture in this house for the last month and a bit, it's going to feel very strange not having <b>The Morning Show</b> to tune into, but this series seemed to have very little to do with TMS and a lot to do with UBA and everything taking place around it, one wonders if the title is the only thing that ties it to the original idea now... It's back in 2025; that seems like a long wait. Watch it if you can, it's dynamite TV.<br /></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">What the Who?</span></i></b></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEg9aVrchTuyak2sl5MfjrevmnxgqsJyHQLKZAvdoq_aJ9gHZKuCKe5COsUgwE71Fxfki1AV6-GPWODBlQ2ku3BVAe3Dn4PvlpaObCbvvu6hj30nfYeXgAo8_Qz3RMlC9kJKcVjv1bV398ikHCHUCkKp9DKqeUwqSbDsyzqkNF4dcvMoj0_cW-Aj1WOK1VJq" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="342" data-original-width="474" height="231" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEg9aVrchTuyak2sl5MfjrevmnxgqsJyHQLKZAvdoq_aJ9gHZKuCKe5COsUgwE71Fxfki1AV6-GPWODBlQ2ku3BVAe3Dn4PvlpaObCbvvu6hj30nfYeXgAo8_Qz3RMlC9kJKcVjv1bV398ikHCHUCkKp9DKqeUwqSbDsyzqkNF4dcvMoj0_cW-Aj1WOK1VJq" width="320" /></a></div>I watched something today - quite out of I know not why - I haven't seen for over 50 years and did so purely out of ancient curiosity. While the wife was doing chores that didn't require my help, I watched the first four-part Jon Pertwee <b>Doctor Who</b> episodes - <i>Spearhead from Space</i>.<p></p><p>I couldn't believe how camp it felt or how ridiculous some of the exposition was, or even how silly it felt. Pertwee was <i>my</i> Doctor, the one I was introduced to - mainly because I lived in Canada during the first two - and while I must have seen this - because I remembered the Autons and the weird plastic meteorites - the rest of it seemed contrived and riddled with more conspiracies than you can shake a stick at. Pertwee looked very young (despite the grey hair); Liz Shaw, his assistant for this short series, was quite dreadful and Lethbridge-Stewart had the feel of a camp pantomime Brigadier about him. It was cutting edge stuff for 1970; in 2024 it felt ancient and like it was made by the local amateur dramatic society as an homage.</p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Q Hi</span></i></b></p><div><p>The funniest episode of the <b>QI</b> U series landed - the poor general quality was sure to end and it was with Ufology that it did. Guests Cally Beaton, Nish Kumar and Tom Ward joined Sandi and Alan to talk about UFOs and space, except UFOs were a bit on the light side as it skirted around the issue and dealt with space in general, but it didn't matter because it did something that hasn't happened much in this series so far - and we're seven episodes in all ready. It was funny; very funny, with a lot of LOL moments with both Beaton and Ward knocking the ball out of the universe. Kumar was his usual GVFM, even if he always sounds like a funny kid at the back of the class who is never quite sure if he's making people laugh or being laughed at.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjtDaIuNRTLfFZ5Tlm9l_w941QmjJs3r7ejDiOuXM7FNmi8x1kQ6XwQWoz7sdjaytwIX7g_W7pJansKW6E6SqqCRNzy_So8EtY50MCsMPygekeAu0HYkmQVi4KDcvOb-SFWNhR-hLtc86n_FokvBKOptgXc5Oh7HJCgWQGjleTfIxKjBnvVbqiS_Occ5JbV" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="266" data-original-width="474" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjtDaIuNRTLfFZ5Tlm9l_w941QmjJs3r7ejDiOuXM7FNmi8x1kQ6XwQWoz7sdjaytwIX7g_W7pJansKW6E6SqqCRNzy_So8EtY50MCsMPygekeAu0HYkmQVi4KDcvOb-SFWNhR-hLtc86n_FokvBKOptgXc5Oh7HJCgWQGjleTfIxKjBnvVbqiS_Occ5JbV" width="320" /></a></div>Ward proved he's a good impersonator - I've seen him before, but I'm not sure where, but his humour was just the right side of observational surreal, while Beaton, making her third or fourth appearance, is very good at self-deprecating humour as well as being just the correct side of being filthy. One of the weirdest points of the show was Sandi Toksvig admitting that she found Bill Clinton surprisingly attractive because of his charisma and ability to seemingly charm his way into the pants of women. Her utterance of 'I would have' was probably the oddest thing she's said since publicly coming out of the closet 30 odd years ago. It was more like what you'd expect from this dinosaur of a quiz show and proves that with the right mix of guests and a subject that allows improvisation this show can still hit the heights. <br /><p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Residual Craplien</span></i></b></p><p>It dawned on me about an hour after watching the first episode in the third season of <b>Resident Alien</b> that I said I probably wasn't going to bother with watching it again. I suppose we watched it because we forgot how absolutely shit its season two turned out to be and how an excellent first season just jumped a dozen sharks and turned into a really fucking dull and unfunny series.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiFZnWf4Kkf28xwzj3iwnnpxk_wlr4B-_EiN7ppRMAe0iCvLpmcJHZGlQXCWu3EJ9avwWd6rIHVk5pRZZxyD75qFiBlTDitEtQft4TeLDujJIOUn3ZWz9Jh4m5-YFFk0AVEtPdKU6dAzgDayQVoRME5jz7zuf1pm3h4o8GXltV-C2kAoLlB6Ah-oZIj8XQg" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="321" data-original-width="474" height="217" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiFZnWf4Kkf28xwzj3iwnnpxk_wlr4B-_EiN7ppRMAe0iCvLpmcJHZGlQXCWu3EJ9avwWd6rIHVk5pRZZxyD75qFiBlTDitEtQft4TeLDujJIOUn3ZWz9Jh4m5-YFFk0AVEtPdKU6dAzgDayQVoRME5jz7zuf1pm3h4o8GXltV-C2kAoLlB6Ah-oZIj8XQg" width="320" /></a></div>Alan Tudyk is a great comedic actor, his Harry Vanderspeigle in season one was funny, sinister and very very alien, but by the time season two came around he had become something of a parody of himself and by the end of this first episode of season three he's just pathetic and actually more annoying than he got last year. Whoever writes this now obviously lost the plot. Also to be just a little more sexist than usual, Sarah Tomko's Asta is now a fucking man mountain of an arse - it's even bigger now than I thought it would ever get (and not in a good way) and Alice Wetterlund's D'Arcy Bloom just looks old, washed out and used. The kids have aged significantly given just a couple of weeks have past since the alleged end of season two and the once brilliant Corey Reynolds as Sheriff Mike Thompson is no longer funny, he's just really fucking stupid.<p></p><p>Harry is now working for the US government with their alien tracking division under Linda Hamilton's General McCallister and is helping them stop the Greys from destroying the planet, which Harry's race of aliens wanted to do but have now changed their minds. Harry's feelings for Asta are compromised when Enver Gjokaj's Joe Rainier - a Grey/Human hybrid - starts dating her and the only person in the show that seems to have any common sense is Elizabeth Bowen's Deputy Baker and even she seems to have lost it a little now. The mayor and his wife have both been abducted and probed, they've also got an owl problem which the Native Americans see as a sign of imminent death and honestly this is a load of shit that I wish I'd stuck to my guns and remembered that I wasn't going to watch it any more because, as I said earlier in this sentence, it's a load of shit. I hope this really isn't what my old mate Pete Hogan's comic book version was like and I also hope he collects a nice cheque and doesn't watch this load of shite because, you know, it might upset any writer worth his salt seeing your baby being dissected and probed by shit aliens. I have a week to try and persuade the wife that we shouldn't watch this any more, but you know, I need something to be horrible about...<br /></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Truth or Colloquial Bullshit?</span></i></b></p><p>We finally got around to starting to watch the 2022 Apple TV mini-series <b>The Essex Serpent</b> and it is as slow and meandering as reviews said it was; but that isn't to say its not an intriguing thing. With a cast including Clare Danes (doing a very good English accent), Tom Hiddleston, Clemence Poesy, Frank Dillane and Hayley Squires it's got some class stamped on it, but the opening two episodes were slower than a neap tide (look it up).</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEh3bajr1hYo_nS36qwZux9p39QTXLexVdQo-FZTRuKqy0_z1iq0cYaaqD3CX27kCvzPsYzHYEUID_z3qAZuUEzoVEcJ-TIt9XwCyEYSEL1au2JBq4iwPvcUHda43OZH-c_cAMn3nzBRcgxfDMR6sk9x0pK-1ws9bgMFEiHWhMHH5HWj6VxGVlJTEFVc262H" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="266" data-original-width="474" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEh3bajr1hYo_nS36qwZux9p39QTXLexVdQo-FZTRuKqy0_z1iq0cYaaqD3CX27kCvzPsYzHYEUID_z3qAZuUEzoVEcJ-TIt9XwCyEYSEL1au2JBq4iwPvcUHda43OZH-c_cAMn3nzBRcgxfDMR6sk9x0pK-1ws9bgMFEiHWhMHH5HWj6VxGVlJTEFVc262H" width="320" /></a></div>There is an intriguing idea going on here, even if it makes little or no real sense. Danes' Cora is a recent widow, the wife of who appears to be a cruel and nasty man who dies from some kind of suffocating illness that could have been cured by late 1890s medicine but he refused. Cora starts to have a kind of relationship with the family doctor who is also an innovative surgeon with new ideas that are pushing medicine forward, and she is also a budding woman of science, interested in archaeology and evolution. She reads about a mythical serpent that allegedly has appeared on the Essex coast and feels drawn to go and investigate it herself. This is where she meets local vicar and serpent denier Hiddleston - as Will Ransome - and then somehow upsets the applecart by helping to find the dead body of the daughter of a local fisherman who believed his daughter had travelled to Malden to sell some silk. <p></p><p>This is a contemplation of religion over science, but is littered with local superstition and mass hysteria that is driving a wedge through the community with the deeply religious belief this is a punishment from the devil - the spiritual denying the existence and science wanting to see if it can be proved. Atmospherically it is wonderous to look at and the Essex landscapes are fabulous; it genuinely makes you feel as though this is 1898, but it creeps along like ivy on a wall and you get the feeling that this is not about a mythical serpent and more about the manipulation of a largely ignorant group of locals with a teacher who is rooted in fire and brimstone rather than logic. There is also an intriguing subplot involving Cora's doctor/surgeon friend, London slums and her assistant Martha, a socialist trying to improve the lives of migrant workers treated like slaves. Perhaps these things will come together, but at the moment it all feels a little disjointed and disparate.<br /></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">The Bland Tour</span></i></b></p><p>I think I'm getting to the stage in my life where I'm finding well established things have pretty much run their course - imagine my oft used Genesis theory, where I essentially went off of the prog band around 1979 but continued to buy their albums for another 13 years under the misguided belief that they'd suddenly start producing great albums again. There were moments during that period of time, but largely I've listened to albums from <i>Duke</i> to whatever the last proper one was called for about five hours of the last 45 years. I feel very much the same about old favourite TV shows; I watch them in the hope that they'll rediscover that oomph that got me hooked as a fan the first time around. <b>The Grand Tour</b> is very much one of those things.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiZYECZ7fBoAJ-G5SWi3raGffVJ3yQM4RmVYSUGJ8PC2iHmOIpEvoCLDN53HdFDSzn0hPBRG4rjd71nIPKesLRBB-Doetzci7XiIRqzXcZwv-vsbnmJ--GuO5Dn6V8njXgGQXVPXaZrzvQWXq2hdzT-a6LJoN6nvbwjgSG9qpoGFlnsQUXjcFacSwJjo4mm" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="315" data-original-width="474" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiZYECZ7fBoAJ-G5SWi3raGffVJ3yQM4RmVYSUGJ8PC2iHmOIpEvoCLDN53HdFDSzn0hPBRG4rjd71nIPKesLRBB-Doetzci7XiIRqzXcZwv-vsbnmJ--GuO5Dn6V8njXgGQXVPXaZrzvQWXq2hdzT-a6LJoN6nvbwjgSG9qpoGFlnsQUXjcFacSwJjo4mm" width="320" /></a></div>I enjoyed <b>Top Gear</b> when these three - Jeremy Clarkson, James May and Richard Hammond - presented it and while I know people thought them boorish and a bit right wing, it was all just an act most of the time. When they brought this current incarnation to Amazon about seven years ago, it was all right, but it wasn't a patch on some of the best Top Gears and only rarely did it really hit those heights again. Since then <b>The Grand Tour</b> has changed to a three/four specials a season format and there has been something a bit 'special' about them; but they do have a formula that has become a little like something that has become funny purely through repetition - the telegraphed joke/stunt that you know will happen, its just a matter of timing.<p></p><p>This most recent instalment has Clarkson, May and Hammond crossing the Sahara from the Northern most part of Mauritania, driving due south until they reach Senegal to finish their tour in Dakar. There is some suspect geography taking place to start with that takes them into the disputed Western Sahara region, but essentially this is three elderly gentlemen in pimped expensive vehicles travelling across a desert for no other reason than because it is there. Mauritania has issued 58 filming permits since 1960 - it is pretty much an unknown quantity for just about everyone outside of the country - a former French colony, mainly Muslim and completely dry - literally and metaphorically; you cannot get an alcoholic drink there for love or money. It is also the toilet of Africa; it appears to be the place where all of the world's plastic, mainly bottles, end up. It is the waste plastic capital of the world and everywhere the three men drove it was littered with rubbish - the country is a tip with a lot of sand and is very, very hot - between 45 and 50 degrees centigrade every day.</p><p>We had the usual stunts - usually aimed at James May. We had the usual car trouble - usually happening to Hammond and we had the usual boorish Englander abroad spiel from Clarkson - who looks like he's carrying someone's baby (and for much longer than just nine months) and frankly it was two hours and 14 minutes of not fucking much - sand, some stunts, some rocks, dodgy roads and it wasn't even very pretty. In fact, when Clarkson and May find an actual oasis they spent so little time there all we got to see were Clarkson's budding varicose veins. It obviously had a number of LOL moments, most of their get togethers do, but they're also telling the same joke so often now that even familiarity is breeding a sort of contempt. They obviously had a good time because, as Clarkson says, it's the first proper Grand Tour they've had for four years, but it felt old and tired - a little like the presenters. James May's travelogues and cooking show are more entertaining; Hammond has found a niche with big buildings and how to fix things, while <b>Clarkson's Farm</b> is actually a lot of fun, despite what the Guardian says; the wife is one of many who watch Millionaire with him presenting it. It might be time, if rumours are to be believed, that Amazon pulls the plug on this and allows these old gits some dignity to waste the rest of their lives doing stuff that suits them and us. </p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Next Week...</span></i></b></p><p>The last <b>Night Country</b> will answer all the questions I've raised or will it just be a load of shite? We'll watch some more <b>Essex Serpent </b>or maybe we'll just forget about it. Are we ever going back to <b>Domino Day</b>? Will we try some of the other Apple TV+ things I've obtained? Am I going to subject myself to more <b>Resident Alien</b>? Or am I going to dig into the archives and find something old to watch rather than new stuff? What about <b>Mr & Mrs Smith</b>? I've promised my mate I'll give it a go, but I'm seeing as many really poor reviews as I am really good ones and I can't persuade the wife to commit. We do seem to be leaving things half finished or just not bothering with any more episodes if we haven't been hooked by a couple. I'm tempted by <b>Criminal Record</b>, which concludes this coming week and which I will have all eight parts - it's highly rated, but what does that really mean now?</p><p>I could list all of the things that might be on the cards, but that's the equivalent of televisual cock teasing because I might not bother with any of them and just carry on reviewing the shite so I can try and make a comedy column out of insulting them. It might be because I'm living in a building site, at the moment, but even the good things feel as though I'm missing something. Our old friend The Guardian ran an article this week suggesting 2024 <i>could</i> be the greatest year for TV ever, but this is a neo-liberal rag that also dances to the tune of whatever their advertisers tell them to. If 2024 is the best TV year ever, I'm going to donate one of my five penises to science...</p><p>In the end, you'll just have to tune in to see...</p></div></div></div>Phil Hallhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12680058800847509275noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5979663737404474935.post-65162389965913971782024-02-10T10:55:00.000+00:002024-02-10T10:55:03.245+00:00TV Culture - Box Clever<p><i>The spoilers featured this week are for shows that have been out for a while and the number of bloody hells uttered in a Sunday night documentary, everything else is as restrained as I can manage...</i></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">1-0</span></i></b></p><p>The third part of <b>Simon Reeve: Wilderness</b> is very much like the previous two and I suppose I have to accept that this is what Reeve considers 'extreme fun' as opposed to his usual cutting edge and cut throat documentaries. In this episode the intrepid explorer is in the Coral Triangle around the Philippines, Indonesia and Papua New Guinea finding rare coral reefs, tribes that live on, in and under the water and finally searching for whale sharks. </p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgnl5XRauhcp5pPxAceAL97hcZnwsNZg81ju9-ZPNsQ2Jnm2V9CQj30pXzxtfx_Znfz7SyKBl4_U7EQ3UJTPo0stHgiCsBbNvwhUE-Id-7e0i3LeK1wP25XV9X9HuIvoSjOzL2-FxulqNdLoi57rYP0qDBV1im0aX40_wTlsj7aw-ETLmCXqCgfOvQSea_4" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="251" data-original-width="443" height="181" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgnl5XRauhcp5pPxAceAL97hcZnwsNZg81ju9-ZPNsQ2Jnm2V9CQj30pXzxtfx_Znfz7SyKBl4_U7EQ3UJTPo0stHgiCsBbNvwhUE-Id-7e0i3LeK1wP25XV9X9HuIvoSjOzL2-FxulqNdLoi57rYP0qDBV1im0aX40_wTlsj7aw-ETLmCXqCgfOvQSea_4" width="320" /></a></div><p>This really is an eco-documentary series rather than anything else; it is about climate change but it's also about protecting the rarest environments on the planet and ensuring the great wildernesses of the world stay that way because without them much of the planet would change much faster than it is presently. This time, especially, we saw the true beauty of the planet - from sky blue seas to rare species of animals to the utterly spellbinding whale shark, the largest fish in the sea and still truly a puzzle for even the best marine biologists on the planet. It was not an episode without some jeopardy, but again it was a problem with a member of the crew rather than anything from outside. </p><p>It was also decisive in one aspect - the wife went 1-0 up in the great Bloody Hell guessing game. She went for her usual (safe) one bloody hell, while I figured that as he was going to be spending a lot of time under water his opportunities to say bloody hell would be limited. He uttered the words at the 32 minute mark when armed eco-police were checking the boat he was on and it was enough to give the wife a lead that she now can't lose, even if I win next week, like the Ashes, she's currently the holder of the Bloody Hell competition and even if I guess correctly next week, she retains the imaginary trophy until the next Simon Reeve series. Bugger. </p><p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">At What Cost?</span></i></b></p><p>There is a scene in the early episodes of season two of <b>The Morning Show</b> where the usually narcissistic Alex Levy (Jennifer Aniston) genuinely tells the perpetually angry Bradley Jackson (Reece Witherspoon) to be careful around ace UBA interviewer Laura Peterson (Julianna Margulies) because the woman wasn't her friend; so when Peterson asks Bradley one of those questions that she didn't want to answer, she does something on the spur of the moment that felt like it was designed to shut the interviewer up but suddenly becomes one of the focal points of the series - Bradley kissed the LGBT+ advocate and found herself plunged into a sexual relationship that even she doesn't seem 100% comfortable about, especially when pressurised to 'come out' by Peterson.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiJpZmFvye-rDcFfoPoCznx9ilGCxUwc6IYyqKV5GIk8RAlb_URe5Ot6Mj189t8lC7cTU4qRkCgL5Wi8h2GsSSrafTbuBtbNojWtTuCazwEmGXrHca3I3xAxj3Xc0iUKXTqMSTNfGZWFDUI7wyLmszns6EV5iYa81d10PChTEA5H7zfhueRjgRqpd7kiGow" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="800" data-original-width="1280" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiJpZmFvye-rDcFfoPoCznx9ilGCxUwc6IYyqKV5GIk8RAlb_URe5Ot6Mj189t8lC7cTU4qRkCgL5Wi8h2GsSSrafTbuBtbNojWtTuCazwEmGXrHca3I3xAxj3Xc0iUKXTqMSTNfGZWFDUI7wyLmszns6EV5iYa81d10PChTEA5H7zfhueRjgRqpd7kiGow" width="320" /></a></div>As a result, Bradley agonised over whether to actually do what Peterson wanted her to do but held off because I think it's clear that Jackson is bi-sexual at a push and coming out would feel as though she was boxing herself into a corner she'd struggle to get out of. The problem is, the fabulous Corrie Ellison (Billy Crudup) has obviously fallen in love with Bradley but has held back from making their great friendship anything but that because of the Mitch Kessler business, which has made everyone involved in the TV business wary of doing anything that can be construed as either coercive or creepy. So when Corrie's heart is visibly shattered as he discovers that the rumours he's heard about are probably true he's faced with a dilemma of his own. You see the head of UBA wants to make the forthcoming shitstorm of libellous stories about the now dead Hannah Schoenberg go away and the only way he can do that is give the newspaper that is going to run these stories something even more salacious and therein lies the biggest dilemma of them all.<p></p><p>Meanwhile, Mitch (Steve Carell) is still in Italy running away from his past but being pursued by a wannabe Italian filmmaker who seems to have designs on him, despite his monstrous history. I'm have a conflict here because Kessler is obviously a prize shit and arguably solely responsible for Hannah's suicide, but he's also genuinely hurting and wants nothing more to do with his past and just wants to disappear into the background. However, his new Italian friend has other ideas, which he is resisting and probably because he's scared of being stung again this time as a victim rather than a perpetrator. He kind of deserves to be butt-fucked, especially as Mitch Kessler might be seen as the new Harvey Weinstein, but there is an argument to suggest he could never be that bad and his predatory nature has been overblown and he is simply a narcissist with no self awareness - which is equally as bad but in his business a little more excusable.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEi4ReNwTQXHNKkp4TOM5B2xCxBMwMSokwwA8tlvkAjtv2Mu0mGLHzu_nBqKTkEPNv-TNv5-uqZW2b4ezn3B-eDu847l4DG1eW42dE7navYcH9Nz3JbnC38EHHgRK4yG8S_c0iCcmTGeEvf7XhkUcYE1JPOLN_xTtzApX6as6zrYCaalkbc777Mm2th_3Sfz" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="2133" data-original-width="3200" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEi4ReNwTQXHNKkp4TOM5B2xCxBMwMSokwwA8tlvkAjtv2Mu0mGLHzu_nBqKTkEPNv-TNv5-uqZW2b4ezn3B-eDu847l4DG1eW42dE7navYcH9Nz3JbnC38EHHgRK4yG8S_c0iCcmTGeEvf7XhkUcYE1JPOLN_xTtzApX6as6zrYCaalkbc777Mm2th_3Sfz" width="320" /></a></div>Chip (Mark Duplass) is having grave reservations about coming back to the show as Alex's producer, not least because he's starting to get hostility from others on the show who see him as a facilitator in the Kessler business and Alex's personality epiphany swings back and forth as she tries to convey this image of a new woman, but in reality she's just as neurotic and narcissistic as she's always been, she's just less self aware. While Corrie's new Head of News, Stella Bak (Greta Lee) is struggling in her role and alienating more people than she's making friends. And all of this has happened in the first half of this season and yet it still feels as though it's treading water compared to the first series...<p></p><p>The second half of the season does what the first half fails to do - it fucks you up. From the utterly devastated Corrie's reaction to Bradley's admission that she likes being with another woman to the conclusion of the Mitch Kessler story that you see (or guess is) coming but it still shocks. Yet, despite all of this the two main factors in the closing episodes are the arrival of Covid - which Alex catches - and how everything starts to fall apart for all the main players; of which Alex is the only person who seems to want to come out fighting. Meanwhile Chip, who might have been complicit in the Kessler business, is so loyal it's like watching a puppy dog trying desperately hard to please its shitbag owner, puts his life at risk to prove this. There is also a quite fantastic interview between Bradley and Maggie Brenner, which the latter is completely unprepared for which, given all that has happened, might just be the thing that cements Bradley and Alex's friendship forever. Cracking stuff, even if it wasn't as good as season one.<br /></p><p><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">Still Angry and Emotional</span></b></p><p>Two weeks after watching <b>Mr Bates Versus The Post Office</b> we watched the documentary that accompanied it, <b>Mr Bates Versus The Post Office: The Real Story</b> and it not only allowed the anger to swell back up, it made anyone watching it want to see people at the Post Office face criminal charges. Whether that can ever happen, because of the cover-up culture employed by the national-owned institution, will probably only get answered if we get a political party in power that cares about righting the wrongs of the past, but it doesn't make anyone feel any better about this entire shit show. What this documentary does is show the real people, the real hardship and the utter hell they were put through. It's all well and good watching a dramatised version, but when you see the real people you have to ask yourself how this crime against humanity was allowed to happen and how the people in charge of that organisation can sleep at night - and I fucking hope none of them can and are fearful for their freedom.</p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">The Grim </span></i></b><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">White </span></i></b></p><p>I get the impression that murder mysteries in snowy locations is a thing at the moment; the problem is I'm not convinced by it as a concept and the latest one - <b>True Detective: Night Country</b> is turning into something almost as dull and pointless as <b>Murder at the End of the World</b>.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjUCe29BZ87-quLm9XJQ12Pf_v8_K3COs1i8ytG24u0oGcOpy8lPg-3Hofd8tBeGoFW5YuXrNxjts7Gx9NlpKGzHPYbCLmUQQ9kcxae_2fdmXpiwGfbLWPIzsLAROLgjfFAMHBWNY2p5T9pnczJ2EIVUeUrpJ39u5qad4x9NcodtC7EEhoOpO993l8ea164" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="1056" data-original-width="1584" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjUCe29BZ87-quLm9XJQ12Pf_v8_K3COs1i8ytG24u0oGcOpy8lPg-3Hofd8tBeGoFW5YuXrNxjts7Gx9NlpKGzHPYbCLmUQQ9kcxae_2fdmXpiwGfbLWPIzsLAROLgjfFAMHBWNY2p5T9pnczJ2EIVUeUrpJ39u5qad4x9NcodtC7EEhoOpO993l8ea164" width="320" /></a></div>All those five star reviews after the first episode makes me wonder what the people reviewing would make of it now we're four parts in and all that seems to be happening is fuck all. This is why I'm convinced my theory is simple and correct. I have to ask if this is a murder mystery why are we spending so much time 'agonising' over Evangeline's sister, who is about as rounded as a Lego piece, or being subjected to Danvers being a Class A arsehole who has slept with just about everybody and no one likes; not even her adopted daughter, her former partner and her boss. Why are we interested in her deputy's Russian mail order bride or her protΓ©gΓ©'s strained relationship with his wife? This is becoming tedious, especially with all the 'ghost story' bollocks, the suggestions that Ennis is a town of the dead, or the fact that these 'days of night' seem to be stretching the whole night thing just a touch. This is just terribly overwrought and really not going anywhere and with only two episodes left something needs to happen soon or it will be a waste of 6 hours of my life. <p></p><p>What is also a little strange is bits of it are filmed in Alaska and these bits seem to feature the mainly US or Native Americans and the bits with the British and Irish actors appear to be filmed in Iceland - Jodie Foster and (the quite awful) Kali Reis straddle the two but no one else does. You don't see Chris Ecclestone anywhere apart from with Jodie Foster and you don't see many of the other recurring characters with other recurring characters - if you catch my drift? I'm just finding the entire thing a bit of a slog and frankly the dysfunctional Alaskans deserve each other with bells on; no one in this show is remotely likeable, apart from maybe Danvers' protΓ©gΓ© and she treats him like shit - but then again, she treats everyone like shit. <br /></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Next Week...</span></i></b></p><p>Obviously, television hasn't been a high priority this week with my house half in rubble as the new kitchen project began. It'll be like this for at least two more weeks is my guess and while the living room is a haven - and a warm one at that - it is, at present, full of my new kitchen, so we're crammed up one end surrounded by boxes.</p><p>Next week will likely be more of the same; the finale of the Simon Reeve series, the penultimate episode of the Jodie Foster mystery - which it appears others are cottoning on to my complaints about - and the third season of everyone's favourite fictional morning TV show. I have a few new things lined up, but whether we'll get to see any is anyone's guess. I want to at least get through a couple more of <b>Domino Day</b> but this seems to be slipping down the priority list quite fast; I promised a good friend that I would check out <b>Mr & Mrs Smith </b>despite not being that attracted to it; I've got <b>The Big Door Prize</b> to watch and <b>The Essex Serpent</b>. I've heard excellent things about <b>Criminal Record</b> and <b>Home Before Dark</b> so they're both sitting and waiting for us to find the time to watch. I also want to give <b>Silo</b> a chance, despite having similar reservations about that which I have with other recommendations and there's all that old stuff I'm promising myself I will rewatch but we only have so many hours in the evening to watch anything...</p><p>As always, you'll find out next time. </p><p><br /></p><p><br /></p><p><br /></p>Phil Hallhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12680058800847509275noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5979663737404474935.post-24944058573576695902024-02-03T11:49:00.000+00:002024-02-03T11:49:11.033+00:00TV Culture - It's February Already!<p><i>Yes, there be spoilers...</i></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">No Doris Day</span></i></b></p><p>A review blog wouldn't be a review blog without me having a pop at The Guardian newspaper. The Nu Right leaning rag has the dodgiest record of reviews known to man, most recently demonstrated by its gushing and fawning reviews of the revamped and new <b>Mrs & Mrs Smith</b> TV series, where it gave it 5 stars in the main newspaper and 4 stars in The Observer, plus extra column inches telling everyone how Donald Glover and Maya Erskine have more chemistry than BASF. Yet, within 24 hours of the release of the entire series IMDB's user rating had it at 6.1... So bearing this in mind, when it gave <b>Domino Day</b> a 4 star review any enthusiasm I had was instantly washed away...</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEh3oYZDMsgxrabG-hbRs9BDyzq9M3cPlIwUt-L8UvPCMtA3aznKKk8Pc9j1dFT5x9S5ScMsrL7yag8wMX1eVZFEYA52juUR5EUoTvR644urSOX9XqO1Y8rqJQfFVlwmUF25XUnJU2ncztQMfwQq_0IOT4l68sEYYRzwF438lQhhJziwauMmEFddhpujV4Bv" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="900" data-original-width="1600" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEh3oYZDMsgxrabG-hbRs9BDyzq9M3cPlIwUt-L8UvPCMtA3aznKKk8Pc9j1dFT5x9S5ScMsrL7yag8wMX1eVZFEYA52juUR5EUoTvR644urSOX9XqO1Y8rqJQfFVlwmUF25XUnJU2ncztQMfwQq_0IOT4l68sEYYRzwF438lQhhJziwauMmEFddhpujV4Bv" width="320" /></a></div>Despite claiming this new BBC3 series to be 'Buffy for the 21st Century' (BtVS actually finished in 2003...) we still watched the first two episodes and we are going to watch the remaining four - not because it's "4-star" telly, but because it isn't shite. However, let's get a couple of things straight - this isn't Buffy for a multitude of reasons and I haven't seen a half decent witch-based TV series, ever. Willow was excellent in Buffy, but she was the exception to the rule and with witches seemingly big in 2024 there might be more nonsense on the horizon... Anyhow, <b>Domino Day</b> is a bit of a mess - plot and story wise - but there's something half decent hiding in here, at the moment, despite being slightly hindered by the poor acting.<p></p><p>Siena Kelly is Day, a modern-day witch with a sketchy history in a world that appears to value order and transparency. How she came into being hasn't yet been explained but it's clear that she was in a relationship with a male witch that went catastrophically wrong and unleased a power inside of her that has not been seen for a long time. As a result, she prowls Tinder for arseholes and then sucks the life out of them - a sort of vigilante psychic vampire targeting the worst kind of men - but she's been noticed by a coven, who answer to a group called the Elders, who are likely to kill Domino if they discover her existence and that is more likely to happen because she's getting greedy and careless. So far so reasonable idea (even if I've skirted over some of the subplots)...</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEg6MthmZdEXO9jVW7E_3bNmZoMKzr5J6xbhKykChW-zq0Ko3EHSSSr-gf3iN5iY_FYQtC5tIQLQBeGItyFwSXgSnP6sQSU7PxfVDf6p-fnRZXlI3D21HW-iOdrp-mfq_lqkn-nCHs0HW3U0GPnDxXEMyFRYhYjCXYcnPOgycGX9RGPqinHMAh6dbiY3vjSG" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="316" data-original-width="474" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEg6MthmZdEXO9jVW7E_3bNmZoMKzr5J6xbhKykChW-zq0Ko3EHSSSr-gf3iN5iY_FYQtC5tIQLQBeGItyFwSXgSnP6sQSU7PxfVDf6p-fnRZXlI3D21HW-iOdrp-mfq_lqkn-nCHs0HW3U0GPnDxXEMyFRYhYjCXYcnPOgycGX9RGPqinHMAh6dbiY3vjSG" width="320" /></a></div>However, there's things about it that seem half-baked, a sense of making it up as they go along and far too many skeletons in characters' closets that given we're a third of the way through seem unlikely to be addressed given the nature of how the first 90 minutes has gone. I feel slightly uncomfortable about the overtly sexy nature of the show - and this isn't me talking about my prudishness, more the feeling that the makers are exploiting Siena Kelly's sexuality and quite fabulous body; plus there's this suggestion that most men are pigs - which might be right in 2024 - so that even decent guys get stitched up or fucked over. In the end, thanks to some questionable magic by the coven leader, we discover that Domino is a Lamia - a monster who, in this instance, devours the life forces of men and leaves them ill, even possibly dead. <p></p><p>The thing is Domino is just looking for real love and her appetite is a metaphor for addiction, but she's not a bad person, even if she does some bad things. I've always liked the idea of massively powerful human 'creatures' in the real world, probably more than anything other monstrous characters, which is why we're going to stick with this until the end of season one, at least.</p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Into the Andes</span></i></b></p><p>The second episode of the <b>Simon Reeve: Wilderness</b> series was in Patagonia, in a proper wilderness, in a place where there were very few people per thousand square mile. There was plenty of rocks and ice and an injured cameraman - the same one who got a worm in his leg last week, yet I still got the sense that this is actually more of a travelogue than a documentary series. </p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjl67qTtpq_ygXF56_eoQsNM1qAUVAKVO1-BQqTfUjDh-UWc9Kb60-FTSAp_ZZw58YsOPSOd1M8b_Fa-aNkHxNv2eU8vD40WARCrIPO-b0zF1j4hdZsA8H_A3610f6sYlYx7vjcN5k822ohljqCKZw11JZLvHI41rqaebet3xtH6S1p48s1tU4qqy--al38" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="264" data-original-width="474" height="178" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjl67qTtpq_ygXF56_eoQsNM1qAUVAKVO1-BQqTfUjDh-UWc9Kb60-FTSAp_ZZw58YsOPSOd1M8b_Fa-aNkHxNv2eU8vD40WARCrIPO-b0zF1j4hdZsA8H_A3610f6sYlYx7vjcN5k822ohljqCKZw11JZLvHI41rqaebet3xtH6S1p48s1tU4qqy--al38" width="320" /></a></div>In the past, Reeve has travelled the world and dealt with issues that have been ignored by other journalists; he's uncovered stuff that others haven't wanted to touch and he's talked to people who maybe never have people talk to them; but this wilderness series seems to be about climate change and while that is an important thing and should get as much exposure as possible, chatting to gauchos or rangers and guides about how the landscape has changed over the last 25 years feels a little like bandwagon jumping, and I really don't want to sound like I'm dissing climate change or the need for it being talked about, but the weird sense of jeopardy has diminished in this series, despite the places he's visiting being as dangerous as skirting round the edges of drug cartels or dealing with fascist militants.<p></p><p>This week he trekked up to an ice field in Patagonia and then back again; spent a couple of nights with two gauchos and then wandered around south eastern Chile with a man who gave up a comfortable life to watch pumas in the wild and at no point in the hour did Simon seem particularly comfortable; in fact he seemed to struggle for a lot of it, yet I spent more time looking at the clock waiting for his second 'bloody hell' and the chance to win this week's competition - I went for two, the wife went for three and he ended up saying it just once. So far, two episodes in and the score is still 0-0; next week could be decisive. </p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">The Mourning Show</span></i></b></p><p>One thing about the remainder of the first season of <b>The Morning Show</b> that hit home really hard is just how self-serving most of the long-time serving members of the Morning Show team were. The decent people on this fictional show are actually fucked up because of the narcissists and the power plays taking place - Jennifer Aniston's Alex Levy is chief narcissist - but studio head Fred Micklen, the kind of man who is sure he's bet on the right horse and then watches it come in last, is really the enabler here. But these are just two self-serving egotists in a huge playing field made up largely of people intent on fucking or fucking over whoever gets in their way. </p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjWzBdW6Jtc8tPvsYdQsn7mMb_tcuUF80tWHYcHdP8EZUW5C8vriAU4RgMTixthA8ZOI1cexrPiqMtXIFxKZcA4RcoDrjqoKlGypsqjsKfdRw4Wjx0RYUmpH70Rz-ZE1RgqWE9F6LUlQ9Z4ykd0nnHMyYWqHpOEVbTxw_TWpZJ_9vvDgSw2WRQFK-OwetzI" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="2133" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjWzBdW6Jtc8tPvsYdQsn7mMb_tcuUF80tWHYcHdP8EZUW5C8vriAU4RgMTixthA8ZOI1cexrPiqMtXIFxKZcA4RcoDrjqoKlGypsqjsKfdRw4Wjx0RYUmpH70Rz-ZE1RgqWE9F6LUlQ9Z4ykd0nnHMyYWqHpOEVbTxw_TWpZJ_9vvDgSw2WRQFK-OwetzI" width="320" /></a></div>Charlie 'Chip' Black (Mark Duplass) is so erratic it makes you wonder how he became executive producer, while Bradley Jackson (Reece Witherspoon) and Corrie Ellison (Billy Crudup) are both doing proper journalism but for differing reasons. Towering over this entire mess is Mitch Kessler (Steve Carell) who spends the first nine episodes of the debut season in complete denial that he's a predatory, manipulative bastard and then tries to use his 'popularity' to win what is essentially a popularity contest in his head. He is, without a doubt a person who <i style="font-weight: bold;">was</i> loved by his co-workers, but now he's in Harvey Weinstein's league and facing ruin because every single one of the Morning Show's team - all with their own agendas - are no longer interested in helping him and, frankly, why should they? The decent ones won't and the Machiavellian ones don't give a shit. The finale is as brilliant as the entire first season with twists and turns you really don't see coming and a closing section that is one of the most riveting scenes I've seen on a TV in years... I've heard that season two loses its way a little; there's only really one way to find out... We're going straight back in!<br /><p></p><p>Season two - of which we're a third of the way through, at time of writing - takes place nine months+ after the tumultuous season one finale and whereas the first outing was all about #MeToo and whether Mitch Kessler was really a monster, this one is dealing with two issues quite clearly: the advent of Covid and whether Bradley Jackson's ego is bigger than her worth - maybe she's turning into a different kind of monster... It hasn't got that WOW Factor it did have, but it does have enough to keep us deeply involved.</p><div><p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Mystery on Ice</span></i></b></p><p>The plot thickens, but the mystery remains the same and I'm still fully committed to my theory that the Tsalaal Research Station men had something to do with Annie's death six years earlier and someone - probably the surviving member of that team and Annie's secret boyfriend - has made them pay for it in a truly horrible way.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEijMiH_xN5kFHNDq-oQcWfzqEqzCE29ZHv21HSoz0l58ucUaDbHJO_207FVI6wfRQqHgexad54xiDfzC5lEfW2pS8w1qZZNU9BeZUHNl-MJBzlGs4pkevaCcmXh78uOvEA4maDePAm7MDyUXScxY2-eDv0wpnbsUfsZHQqyD4L6lRX6S45b13oJQMxt9RvK" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="281" data-original-width="474" height="190" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEijMiH_xN5kFHNDq-oQcWfzqEqzCE29ZHv21HSoz0l58ucUaDbHJO_207FVI6wfRQqHgexad54xiDfzC5lEfW2pS8w1qZZNU9BeZUHNl-MJBzlGs4pkevaCcmXh78uOvEA4maDePAm7MDyUXScxY2-eDv0wpnbsUfsZHQqyD4L6lRX6S45b13oJQMxt9RvK" width="320" /></a></div>I'm firmly in the camp of this is going to be a simple story that's being wrapped up in mystic bollocks and arctic Indian campaigning; there's a lot of dressing on this but it's essentially going to be a case of brewing revenge that finally got enacted when guilt overcame those with something to hide.<br /><p></p><p>Probably the other main issue here is how the Ennis PD can be so... well, shit. This series has done extremely well in painting a picture of a disparate and dysfunctional Alaskan township with a mix of indigenous natives and racist Americans, but we're also talking off the scale levels of fuckwittery and borderline vigilantism - led by one of Danvers' (Jodie Foster) own men, who seems to think that being a policeman comes in about fifth or sixth on his list of priorities. Danvers has so many sexual skeletons in her closet she seems incapable of dealing with anything apart from insisting this case stays in her jurisdiction; but what we're really talking here is fluff and padding because I'm convinced this is going to be something simplistic, despite the ghosts and messages from beyond the grave and whatever else the writer/director wants to throw in to obfuscate and keep the viewer off the trail. It's excellent TV but I'm not really sure I'm enjoying it. </p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Quite American</span></i></b></p><p>The latest <b>QI</b> is essentially a battle between the United Kingdom and the United States - as part of the U season - and the overarching thing I took from it was the underlying contempt David Mitchell appears to have for the Americans. He seemed hell bent on lecturing Alex Edelman of the USA team about how wrong he was about anything he didn't like about the UK. There were times Mitchell seemed like he was going to walk round the front of the set and lamp the American.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiRu2JBGYlxv0Vlk73cGCMOcAcfaF1uB1IFV2Z0sL141eSrUR9IgrxJldcs94WurWlw09YvzUrRz6dAtkI7HBK7Oy4wFcgw3Z3ekF_F_XkghLlnFjfT2cUInPHG9aGjyxpZwXpNei4b_4DMkxb-olQ3sL5IThvQicT98Qec-R2qgr6V9_iDw0xeAZezgxSR" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="261" data-original-width="464" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiRu2JBGYlxv0Vlk73cGCMOcAcfaF1uB1IFV2Z0sL141eSrUR9IgrxJldcs94WurWlw09YvzUrRz6dAtkI7HBK7Oy4wFcgw3Z3ekF_F_XkghLlnFjfT2cUInPHG9aGjyxpZwXpNei4b_4DMkxb-olQ3sL5IThvQicT98Qec-R2qgr6V9_iDw0xeAZezgxSR" width="320" /></a></div>The other American guest - Kemah Bob recently caused a bit of a hoo-hah on the internet because of her unusual voice and diction. I got the impression she spent much of her time trying to be as diplomatic as possible, but she <i>has</i> lived in the UK for six years. To be controversial for a second, while I found her voice a bit odd, which is fine as it's her actual voice, the fact that people were horrid to her on social media just about sums up what is wrong with both the UK and the USA, with opinionated arseholes being fucking nasty for the sake of it. If I want to be equally nasty, there's a UK comedian who is disabled and, in my never humble opinion, is not funny and spends most of her time talking about other women she'd like to shag; she's also a regular on <b>QI</b> and I can't understand 90% of what she says and I never see anything on social media about her, so maybe the attacks on Kemah is nothing to do with her distinct voice and more to do with the fact she's black?<p></p><p>In other news, this wasn't a particularly funny episode, but that's probably down to the fact that I find the USA a spectacular country full of tedious bores and fascist loving racists. I also expect you're going to be thinking, 'Why is he still watching this if all he can do is criticise it every week?' Well, it's probably to do with history and habit, also the hope that an episode will come along and make me remember why this was one of the best panel shows ever created. </p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Connections</span></i></b></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjJ2mf1Yg5zzjH1Gv7vGsvrZyc6LLG57GTq88lEo3UM6sJ1tLj16lQBeyTElSluKYc0W9iYS5tuPwxnfwZ_mDf9zJMNy5dmMmBcXwrW3StQ4wEVtPvPVjHIenP0PaZtHI_D_l196f7qh9RsVx64FG02oDvGp5LBRzVxLqW9bfZiTIAZSO8xi5HyefkO5oMF" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="266" data-original-width="474" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjJ2mf1Yg5zzjH1Gv7vGsvrZyc6LLG57GTq88lEo3UM6sJ1tLj16lQBeyTElSluKYc0W9iYS5tuPwxnfwZ_mDf9zJMNy5dmMmBcXwrW3StQ4wEVtPvPVjHIenP0PaZtHI_D_l196f7qh9RsVx64FG02oDvGp5LBRzVxLqW9bfZiTIAZSO8xi5HyefkO5oMF" width="320" /></a></div>Another series of <b>Only Connect</b> bites the dust. This is a quiz show that's on for more than half a year from start to finish and is still possibly the most fiendishly difficult thing on TV. This year The Thrifters won it on the very last question beating the Also Rans by a single point and while we wanted the losers to win, we weren't that bothered because both teams said 'horned viper' rather than 'hor-Ned viper,' which is something that gets on both of our nerves. I know many people who find Victoria Coren-Mitchell loathsome but as a quiz show host she's always been good enough for me and she's married to David Mitchell and he won extra brownies points this week for being passively aggressive towards Americans. I will say that she is beginning to look her age - she's 51 - and (to be outrageously sexist for a second) her good points are probably heading due south now... Unlike something like QI, which changed hosts without any real jolt to the system, <b>Only Connect</b> just wouldn't be the same if it lost its slightly - at times - surreal host. Anyhow, we get 22 weeks off before it starts all over again... <p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Next Week...</span></i></b></p><p>I'm loathe to say 'more of the same' but that's likely to be the case. We haven't watched the most recent George Clarke offering, it's been on the hard drive for a week now and the wife was more keen to watch something else, so she might be starting to get Clarke fatigue as well - there could be a return to that next week, but I somehow don't expect that to be the reason whoever reads this will rush to come back. We do have the start of <b>Masters of the Air</b> to watch, but despite great reviews, I have this 'problem' with Austin Butler, so we've been putting that off. There's stuff on the Flash Drive of Doom to catch up on and there's usually something new or returning that jumps up on me, so you'll just have to wait and see what happens next...</p><p><br /></p></div>Phil Hallhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12680058800847509275noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5979663737404474935.post-68694568197173224102024-02-01T10:57:00.000+00:002024-02-01T10:57:02.856+00:00Film Culture - History (Three Ways) and Futures<p><i>If you like having films spoiled for you keep on going... </i></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">A Bone Apart</span></i></b></p><p>Well, that was two and a half hours of my life I'm not getting back. Let's be honest about this, <b>Napoleon</b> is really quite boring. The scenes of war are impressive, actually they're very impressive and quite brutal, but the rest of the film is an absolute snorefest.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgUR2Qhrvu7rvZiGlwh_TtO711cRUKA198OelBXNimHtgIXlo-iwem7meDv8w6_9kaBllRPUsL87GDQwiNthJEPjpPX-MQa37pXH_2tjK_k8Il7jTnj-SF1WsQGdCy5MzrK0C1lS_tSHGCcC0LdwLfTWuXRUxR9fxQqdeaXGuJGhqG2NHWg6yjuNO3s8fib" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="1030" data-original-width="2560" height="129" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgUR2Qhrvu7rvZiGlwh_TtO711cRUKA198OelBXNimHtgIXlo-iwem7meDv8w6_9kaBllRPUsL87GDQwiNthJEPjpPX-MQa37pXH_2tjK_k8Il7jTnj-SF1WsQGdCy5MzrK0C1lS_tSHGCcC0LdwLfTWuXRUxR9fxQqdeaXGuJGhqG2NHWg6yjuNO3s8fib" width="320" /></a></div>Joachim Phoenix brings about as much energy to the role of Napoleon Bonaparte as a corpse does to a funeral. I mean, I don't know what the bloke was like - the historical one not Phoenix - but he was as miserable as a wet weekend in Frinton and really needed to lighten up a bit. There was one scene, early on, where someone who was talking to him thought he'd fallen asleep but he was just being moody and mysterious. Plus, his love for Josephine had all the impact of trying to get one of those polystyrene mannequin heads to give you a blow job. It was a bit like a dramatised history lesson with the most boring history teacher.<p></p><p>Vanessa Kirby as the love of his life who shagged around behind his back and only loved him when he threatened to take everything away was not really convincing either; she seemed like a 21st century woman acting in a drama about people from past. There was a stream of people appearing in it who didn't appear again; Mark Bonner was the most consistent as Napoleon's number two, but he was gone before the hour mark, then it was literally someone new every scene - Julian Rhind-Tutt popped up to get Napoleon to rule France with him and then we never saw him again and this seemed to go on for ever. Some people were given little subtitles under them to let us know who they were and others did not and it was all wrapped up quicker than Napoleon having a go on his philandering missus. It was interminably dull and apparently it's been nominated for several Oscars, but then again so have a number of films we've seen over the last few weeks which bored the tits off of us. It wasn't a load of shit but it wasn't riveting entertainment either.<br /></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Theatrical</span></i></b></p><p>If ever there was a science fiction film that felt so unlike a science fiction film it's <b>The Man From Earth</b>, a very strange movie that could almost have been a one act play given that virtually all the 'action' takes place in the living room of the main character John Oldman's cabin.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEi-W7KZlSHil0hNUxIvrbIUPL7veGu15zcVW2sZxLl8SJ0DcbLGIrqP9bDFFH-8se2PTwtI0p6PZ4qvadihTw9sM2MDbj3FHnhFqoOF6WMW549Cnljuet4lFFgtHSyfXRQnHqpIxPN6Kl48IClf5q5OIwNInylgJLI3iqJA8RkwCO2_gwQxQJNHCpnCmMOi" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="440" data-original-width="780" height="181" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEi-W7KZlSHil0hNUxIvrbIUPL7veGu15zcVW2sZxLl8SJ0DcbLGIrqP9bDFFH-8se2PTwtI0p6PZ4qvadihTw9sM2MDbj3FHnhFqoOF6WMW549Cnljuet4lFFgtHSyfXRQnHqpIxPN6Kl48IClf5q5OIwNInylgJLI3iqJA8RkwCO2_gwQxQJNHCpnCmMOi" width="320" /></a></div>He invites his friends from the college he works at for a fond farewell as he moves to pastures new, but they're intrigued as to why he's leaving them, then one of his friends mentions that in the 10 years they've known him he hasn't aged a day and this leads to the unveiling of a fantastic story that causes all kinds of consternation and arguments among the group of friends gathered. John announces he is about 14,000 years old and he has been travelling the world avoiding being discovered since he realised that he was never getting any older. He'd been sick and he'd been injured but he doesn't scar and he always recovers from even the deadliest of diseases and he decides, just this once, to tell his friends his story. What follows is lots and lots of talking, supposition and disbelief; there's anger, interest and interventions, but gradually some of the people in the room start to believe him while others simply think he's either mad or playing some monstrous practical joke on them.<br /><p></p><p>It's not action packed - in fact the most energetic thing that happens is removal men taking his furniture away - it's very wordy and I expect it is quite boring (I had to stop the wife from falling asleep and she actually thought it was a clever idea) for some people who expected more. Yet it is intriguing; it leaves you wondering all the way until the end whether it's truth or bullshit and it has a twist in the tail that turns out to be pivotal to the entire 90 minutes. It touches very much on theology and the origins of deities and doesn't try to be clever or anything other than a story that might be true and if it is true then its simplicity makes it all the more difficult to disbelieve. It's got a high rating for such a stylised and speciality type of film and there was a sequel to it that is apparently an absolute heap of steaming shit, which, rest assured, we won't be watching. As a curiosity though it is really worth 90 minutes of your time, especially the twist.</p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Modern Family?</span></i></b></p><p>There was a reasonably good sci-fi film hiding inside the 2018 movie <b>Kin</b>; the problem was that whoever made it didn't really realise this, instead gluing together lots of stuff that seemed to mimic other sci-fi films from the past mixed with gritty crime dramas.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjOPs5lY6REVCbjmmMeziR6V-QCrF9NlX0mz4e4WqmNiNv8sR-1pWnTwFHI9M16gcNqnqg8uVnVHdpNklvfpEzLN57Fy27SqPXw5V8tBnCOoUEcaneKMs_gUGtL9siRnzYuHMiGOhS_fgrUNeXhTTCM9ZSdPMY5G_u_3TAKKWJBnYhtvVSLOfyl-5PbN_jh" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="2194" data-original-width="3900" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjOPs5lY6REVCbjmmMeziR6V-QCrF9NlX0mz4e4WqmNiNv8sR-1pWnTwFHI9M16gcNqnqg8uVnVHdpNklvfpEzLN57Fy27SqPXw5V8tBnCOoUEcaneKMs_gUGtL9siRnzYuHMiGOhS_fgrUNeXhTTCM9ZSdPMY5G_u_3TAKKWJBnYhtvVSLOfyl-5PbN_jh" width="320" /></a></div><b>Kin</b> is about Eli, a 14 year old boy who finds a piece of very dangerous alien tech that only he can operate. The tech, which is a mighty weapon has a number of settings, all of which cause a shit load of damage.<p></p><p>This is a movie that is about a young black boy who has been adopted by a white family. His 'father' played by Dennis Quaid (looking very old) is a straight forward hardworking man whose natural son has just been released from prison after serving six years for an unspecified theft/robbery. Quaid has concentrated on bringing Eli up properly, especially since his wife died and doesn't need his real son screwing up things, especially as he's come out of jail with a $60,000 bill to a local crime family. Things go a little wonky, Quaid gets killed in botched robbery, as does crime boss James Franco's brother and what follows is a road movie of sorts as the two brothers cross country trying to escape the shit show they have inadvertently left behind and then the alien tech comes into play and it all goes a bit... well, I was going to say cliched and shit, but not shit as in a bad way - in fact some of the action sequences are highly entertaining, especially when Eli fires the gun at things and people - more like shit in a 'oh for heaven's sake who made this shit' kind of way. </p><p>This is a poorly plotted, quite dreadfully paced film with some really well known actors totally wasted - including Carrie Coon, the aforementioned Franco, ZoΓ« Kravitz and Michael B Jordan - in what is essentially a wanker dragging his kid brother into all kinds of fucking stupid situations, because the elder brother doesn't have two brain cells to rub together. You start to wonder why he was only in prison for six years, when he should have been thrown in a pit and had the ladder burned. Jack Reynor as Jimmy was probably supposed to be an incompetent moron, while young Eli seemed to have a brain - proven in the final scenes - and all the things that happened really made little or no sense; just a lot of things sown together to make something that resembled a coherent sci-fi film. I'd avoid this if it ever appears near a streaming service or DVD near you. Oh and Kin is the theme to it, especially when you discover just what kin really means, but that message is also poorly executed. The wife, I think, found it a fun and entertaining film; I couldn't wait for it to end.</p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Bang Bang, You're Dead</span></i></b></p><p>I know people who rate Ben Wheatley as a filmmaker, but almost all of his films have below average ratings on most film sites; <b>Sightseers</b>, <b>Kill List</b> and the film we watched tonight <b>Free Fire</b> are the highest rated films on the two major films sites - IMDB and Rotten Tomatoes; everything else doesn't come out with many plaudits. We have seen most of his films and I've never been quite sure why; probably because people we like rank him as a good filmmaker so we wanted to see if we were wrong about him. I don't think we were...</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEi_J8-quUL3aCdlI62frkD6tuR2VJS6iBxmaMst3Fh0fMiLeL2D1qhdVC8Stdf44irn3mE4RTHC1oA0Wc3J1pMMMXeilgnvAZu-c1cgyY23DfQQ_67-ZxDGGK2kczZsGA5BbOBc8TOnXt7PInc-HxCjC2b_vCHa4HzMpi6QJwav4Hds9mw47ncd-6EJDi9E" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="580" data-original-width="1160" height="160" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEi_J8-quUL3aCdlI62frkD6tuR2VJS6iBxmaMst3Fh0fMiLeL2D1qhdVC8Stdf44irn3mE4RTHC1oA0Wc3J1pMMMXeilgnvAZu-c1cgyY23DfQQ_67-ZxDGGK2kczZsGA5BbOBc8TOnXt7PInc-HxCjC2b_vCHa4HzMpi6QJwav4Hds9mw47ncd-6EJDi9E" width="320" /></a></div>However, <b>Free Fire</b> is head and shoulders the best thing I've ever seen with Wheatley's name attached. It's a riotous violent comedy with so many excellent moments that I'm amazed that the 51 year old director actually made it. I mean, his films are usually vaguely erudite, strange and oddly paced; sometimes just weird and difficult to follow and, to be fair, this wasn't what we expected at all, this was bonkers almost from the word go; a colourful, 1970s set action comedy about an arms deal that goes spectacularly wrong because of two people - one on either side of the deal - who both wanted the blood of the other.<p></p><p>There's a lot of famous names in this film; Cillian Murphy, Brie Larson, Sharlto Copley, Jack Reynor (who plays the idiot brother in <b>Kin</b>), Armie Hammer, Michael Smiley and Sam Riley and there's a lot of guns, loads of gun fights, wounds, blood, swearing, drugs and double crosses galore and it's a 90 minute riot - a thoroughly bonkers film which doesn't really take itself seriously and you have to ask why Wheatley can make a film like this and then something like <b>A Field in England</b>, which was just a load of shite. [For Wheatley, also see Robert Eggers]. <br /></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Run Run Run</span></i></b></p><p>Part of me thinks of <b>Forrest Gump</b> as a comedy, because it has so many funny moments in it, but after watching it for the first time in probably 25+ years, the overreaching impression is it's possibly one of the most tragic and sad movies I've ever seen. It is a work of utter genius, but it's also so heartbreakingly sad that it's difficult to watch it without wanting to burst into tears.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEib_RIekZrr2W7-klT8Ory_SSKbppZ5DX-Ul52_XvcS_mlcZVfqLS9OB2lvGn9gYWMEvUgvMLv2qvrbzpe_dlHdNCJQO7RAssY1SMlR7opZJkYg8cIGzIJ_P-COTJL572J2UnNg0KjR4GF6QNmDOKMXIkBOJD3O6nAvXcChBvQign3qi7juGddC8dTl7YJK" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="770" data-original-width="1200" height="205" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEib_RIekZrr2W7-klT8Ory_SSKbppZ5DX-Ul52_XvcS_mlcZVfqLS9OB2lvGn9gYWMEvUgvMLv2qvrbzpe_dlHdNCJQO7RAssY1SMlR7opZJkYg8cIGzIJ_P-COTJL572J2UnNg0KjR4GF6QNmDOKMXIkBOJD3O6nAvXcChBvQign3qi7juGddC8dTl7YJK" width="320" /></a></div>For those of you who have never seen it - not that many I'd hazard a guess - Tom Hanks plays a man with an IQ of 75 who despite being mentally challenged is fortunate enough to succeed in life where many others haven't. His propensity for running fast saved his hide and got him into college because he was a fantastic American football player; his speed and strength gets him through Vietnam along with the Medal of Honour for bravery - saving his CO and many men - and his tenacity makes him rich, he wanted to be a shrimp fisherman because of his friend Bubba and good fortune meant he became the biggest in the USA, making millions of dollars for him and his former CO. However, all the time Forrest was having an adventure of a lifetime and inadvertently living the American Dream all he could think of was his best friend in the world, the girl who gave him a seat on his first school bus journey, Jenny.<p></p><p>When you look at the film through the success it sounds like a heart-warming tale of achievement against adversity, but in reality it is a catalogue of tragedy from Forrest being bullied for being stupid, his mother having to give sexual favours to enable him to go to a proper school, to being rejected by the love of his life on countless occasions, the death of Bubba, the ruination of his CO's life because of the horrors of war; the death of his mother and finally the death of his beloved Jenny, in the 1980s, from AIDS - contracted during her drug usage and promiscuity period. <b>Forrest Gump</b> is just one of the saddest film you will ever see. The penultimate scene where he is talking to Jenny's grave is probably Tom Hanks's finest scene in a long and illustrious career. </p><p>Robin Wright, Gary Sinese, Sally Field, Mykelti Williamson and everyone else who made this film an Oscar-winning triumph are all fantastic; this is probably Robert Zemekis's best film and probably the last great film he made - he did make <b>Contact</b> and then <b>Castaway</b> a few years later, but I think his star was waning by then. If you're one of the few people who hasn't seen this, then you should track it down; it's quite a beautiful movie, but remember it is also desperately sad and will probably make you cry... </p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Hive Story</span></i></b></p><p>What a way to finish off the week; A Jaysun Stayfum movie! You remember Jaysun Stayfum? He was last seen in that abysmal - Ben Wheatley - film <b>The Meg 2</b> and here he is as someone in <b>The Beekeeper</b>, a film that plays fast and loose with facts to make a movie that defies logic.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgR7jryS_U2i-HJxDFPDEQHIlrw4Uh9Qa8gbCciQKNGgstaUL0cCv22AxZeQYpsktgDEZwC90pFsX5DUTgv0mSXidWfaY43zxaNPNadZGOaslUftiB0VjPHReh6uPB-febmah98ohRm1sQO9jQ0nRZDUWW3nPZ1tkDELd3gFFq74elLccaeZ7WIZ0S5OdQp" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="266" data-original-width="474" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgR7jryS_U2i-HJxDFPDEQHIlrw4Uh9Qa8gbCciQKNGgstaUL0cCv22AxZeQYpsktgDEZwC90pFsX5DUTgv0mSXidWfaY43zxaNPNadZGOaslUftiB0VjPHReh6uPB-febmah98ohRm1sQO9jQ0nRZDUWW3nPZ1tkDELd3gFFq74elLccaeZ7WIZ0S5OdQp" width="320" /></a></div>We're talking super action bonkers feature with the relentless Stayfum as a super special agent who is so good, so frightening and so deadly that the former head of the CIA literally shits his pants every time the words 'Bee' and 'Keeper' are spoken [some details in this review are not strictly true]. This person is played by Jeremy Irons, who was obviously paid a lot of money to shit his pants a lot and sound terrified at the prospect of having his hand broken (which happens near the end as he gets away with only broken bones and shit-stained pants). The body count in this is so high they needed a super computer to keep up with it and it all leads back to the President of the United States (played by Jemma Redgrave being less convincing than when she plays Kate Lethbridge-Stewart in Doctor Who) whose son is essentially a massive cunt who steals money from poor innocent and lovely people to fund his mum's election campaign and keep her living in a style far better than POTUS would normally. Mum, of course, has no idea that her son is a monumental shit bag and therefore is spared by Jaysun Stayfum from an ignominious death.<p></p><p>This is a hoot. It's essentially a British film with some location work in Boston, but even if it's set in the States it looks a lot like Devon and with a couple of exceptions all the actors are Brits. It plays fast and loose with the facts because POTUS's defence is made up of people built out of string and a bunch of colourful vigilantes dressed like they're going to a rave. Stayfum infiltrates her big private party so easily, it was like he wanders into the middle of an FBI raid - aimed at catching him - and beats them all up using just a feather duster and his anus [this actually happens but not with the feather duster or his anus]. It is so fucking awful it's great fun. From the moment Stayfum literally blows a building up using just a can of petrol and his dynamic acting ability you know you're onto something as special as the most special thing ever, EVER. </p><p>I could go on but I don't want to because it might spoil it for you and you deserve to have this spoiled for you by you alone. You need to watch this and wonder why you did and then go to bed wondering why you did and having a restless night as you work out how come Jaysun manages to kill over 30,000 [some 'facts' are wrong in this review] using just his hands and a cocktail stick and then swims off into the sunset with only a stab wound and a dodgy arm. The girl who was in <b>The Umbrella Academy</b> - the one who can whisper things and people do it - is also in this film; she's put on a fair bit of weight since that series and her acting skills are Olivier level [they really aren't] in a movie that makes about as much sense as why people find Michael McIntyre funny. Watch it, it's fucking awful and brilliant at the same time, simultaneously. </p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Next Time...</span></i></b></p><p>On the horizon - the <b>Aquaman</b> follow-up has been on the Flash Drive of Doom for over a week now, the problem is I just can't bring myself to watch it because everyone who has seen it has killed themselves because of how brilliant it isn't... The next week sees <b>Poor Things</b> hit the streaming world, everyone and their living aunt is raving about this film, except some people who think it's exploitative horse shit. Having read about some of the scenes, I'm debating with my prudish self whether I want to go there; after all I decided not to watch <b>Saltburn</b> because of some of the sex scenes (you see, this is what happens when you get into your 60s, you want sex scenes to be under the covers, in darkened rooms. I do believe this is more to do with my feminism rather than embarrassment though).</p><p>I sometimes wonder if I'm running out of films to watch, but obviously I'm not as the FDoD currently has 37 films on it and the TV hard drive has about another 20 - the problem is I need to feel like watching something and hope that the wife is up for it as well, otherwise we end up watching something like <b>Napoleon</b> or <b>The Beekeeper</b> and I then have to use my imagination to describe them in as many humorous (or disappointed) ways as possible... </p>Phil Hallhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12680058800847509275noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5979663737404474935.post-24324997280454144482024-01-27T09:50:00.001+00:002024-01-27T09:50:16.402+00:00TV Culture - A Range of Emotions<p><i>There's some spoilers here and there, but old stuff not so much...</i></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Angry, Upset and Disgusted</span></i></b></p><p>Fuck. Fucking hell. <b>Mr Bates versus The Post Office</b> is without a doubt the most emotive television programme/series I think I've ever watched. It made me want to scream at the TV; it made me want to scream at politicians, at the Post Office and at the general injustice of it all - British Justice: what a fucking joke; what an absolute load of horse shit.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEj_bRpGR05SWfGsgk7zhn5AMaFDLXVEOaXNzOnlulJBpnVD3m_LvNAaSxQ72-B7rEKgRWjnp_T0x9ekdlueb2G74ihrWFc2zN9aKEBgwa3iCtGI6O_dgW4RJzTdDwDGFDC-uLLr2C4iDvWjmXQO2TOdOjE-MMIzRf3o0uzh4j6gCNz6pSRdPe6xuBu2qIBC" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="266" data-original-width="474" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEj_bRpGR05SWfGsgk7zhn5AMaFDLXVEOaXNzOnlulJBpnVD3m_LvNAaSxQ72-B7rEKgRWjnp_T0x9ekdlueb2G74ihrWFc2zN9aKEBgwa3iCtGI6O_dgW4RJzTdDwDGFDC-uLLr2C4iDvWjmXQO2TOdOjE-MMIzRf3o0uzh4j6gCNz6pSRdPe6xuBu2qIBC" width="320" /></a></div>Honestly, by the end of it I had tears in my eyes and I know the wife did and I think we were both so fucking angry, because for over 20 years peoples lives have been systematically destroyed by a Post Office - owned by the government; Conservative and Labour - that lied, cheated and knowingly fucked up the lives of sub-postmasters every week, wilfully and with a degree of evil that is just utterly wrong. A corporation that went out of its way to obfuscate and prevent the truth from coming out; a corporation that treated those seeking the truth like imbeciles and felt it was above the law to the point of making the law an absolute mockery. This was undeniably the most damning thing and greatest miscarriage of justice in the history of the United Kingdom. This was a fucking sick joke dished out by a group of people who should, if there's any justice face criminal proceedings and Paula fucking Vennels, handing back her CBE after it, she should be put inside for a long time. The woman is a Christian - allegedly and apparently - it just confirms my longstanding belief that Christianity is the worst fucking religion on the planet, a religion inhabited by people who wouldn't know the true meaning of Christianity if it was spelt out to them on a big fuck off white board. <br /><p></p><p>Do I need to tell you what this four-part series was about? I expect anyone who doesn't has been either hiding away for years or is one of those atrociously awful right wing wankers who thinks British law is fabulous and all of these people were secretly criminals - don't think that hasn't already been said on numerous pages because I've seen it. This is about a 20+ year fight to clear the name of people who were essentially framed by the Post Office as criminals; many of whom have died, committed suicide, been financially ruined, lost everything, suffered mental health issues - have been victimised and demonised by a business that knew - it fucking <i><b>knew</b></i> - what it was doing. </p><p>God, I'm so fucking angry, disgusted and upset and so should you and most of this happened on the Tories watch and ironically if it hadn't been for a back bench Tory MP it might still be raging on, claiming more people's lives. Cunts the lot of them, every single fucking last one of the cunts who knew about this and tried to hide it. CUNTS!</p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">All Star Brilliance</span></i></b></p><p>And breathe...</p><p>I've said this before but it's worth saying again - dump Netflix, dump Disney+, dump Amazon, Hulu and whatever other streaming services are out there and get Apple TV+. You won't regret it and pound for pound you will not be disappointed with your return. This is a streaming network that might have brought us that borderline awful <b>Monarch</b> series, but also knocks the ball out of the park with shows such as <b>Ted Lasso</b>, <b>Lessons in Chemistry</b>, <b>For All Mankind</b>, <b>Shrinking</b>, <b>Silo</b> and now <b>The Morning Show</b>.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhMkUEcbKoZ23HuF0W0gYqOVQ1qeKlA9JnmoBNWP1d-UWaZsSlBpY0OQX88Uc0INmNlZ1_ux6kT72hacEJpjbzT7W6OeHXCDbsqekQhliVVr15O0W4rE_Ng495vLOkI5rAswT7pdMcDOrq5lpBdAc-EbKnE6KH9XJqtzrzwEoEffSk5w-byonx8NzmrUL7t" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="600" data-original-width="900" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhMkUEcbKoZ23HuF0W0gYqOVQ1qeKlA9JnmoBNWP1d-UWaZsSlBpY0OQX88Uc0INmNlZ1_ux6kT72hacEJpjbzT7W6OeHXCDbsqekQhliVVr15O0W4rE_Ng495vLOkI5rAswT7pdMcDOrq5lpBdAc-EbKnE6KH9XJqtzrzwEoEffSk5w-byonx8NzmrUL7t" width="320" /></a></div>Okay, the <b>Morning Show</b> started in 2019 but I didn't know it was an Apple TV series and the moment I discovered it was I was on my torrents search engine looking for it and to kick the week off we started with the first episode. Man, what an all-star cast, I mean who hasn't been on this show? It's wall to wall A list celebs, padded out with B list celebs and has people in it you haven't seen for years and others who will go onto bigger things. What you have to start with is Jennifer Aniston as the co-anchor of the eponymous <b>Morning Show</b>, who for 15 years has co-hosted with Steve Carell, but he's suddenly fired for a 'Me Too' moment and lives are thrown into complete turmoil - history has been made and cancelled.<p></p><p>Also involved in this is Reece Witherspoon (about to become Aniston's new co-host), Mark Duplass, Gugu Mbatha-Raw, Brett Butler, Billy Crudup, Nestor Carbonell, Jack Davenport and that's just the <i>first </i>episode, there's a whole host of others lined up for one, two or three episode guest appearances and this first season is going to be about the fallout from Carell's character's departure and how the USA's one time favourite morning show maintains its audience and gets bigger. It sounds a bit trite, possibly even boring, but trust me on this, This is TV that kicks you in the balls and then gives them a gentle massage, but you know there's another kick coming, maybe two. We needed a new series to get into and instead of trying one of the things we have already, we've dived into something I hadn't even considered 24 hours ago. I don't think there's been anything since the heyday of Aaron Sorkin that has been this compelling and riveting about US television.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEj42Zr23ZEeYV2Z_508gzONLBsyTdOTKxbtaIB72F1QHaDmp2mhOqTVkNQqQXnSEn7zkUPYGzTTCceDEcWMRL51Mno_52jv7O72DOqMMhX8TT20yBmH00f9QgZBICYVQUJHijkg3Ql8Z1kVxmakJ9LE0JETwvuabt6O4OOEy0cq9gZ9FTgIFpIgD2Qkxl0_" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="273" data-original-width="474" height="184" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEj42Zr23ZEeYV2Z_508gzONLBsyTdOTKxbtaIB72F1QHaDmp2mhOqTVkNQqQXnSEn7zkUPYGzTTCceDEcWMRL51Mno_52jv7O72DOqMMhX8TT20yBmH00f9QgZBICYVQUJHijkg3Ql8Z1kVxmakJ9LE0JETwvuabt6O4OOEy0cq9gZ9FTgIFpIgD2Qkxl0_" width="320" /></a></div>Crudup is superb as the almost psychotic deputy head of the network who seems to believe in chaos over order and it is absolutely brilliant to see him cast as someone other than the villain of the piece - that's not to say he won't end up being the villain, but at the moment he's absolutely fucking excellent as the 'shoot first and ask questions if we feel like it' exec. Mark Duplass, who like Jake Johnson in last week's film blog, is a <b>Safety Not Guaranteed </b>alumni is also pretty good as the bewildered executive producer of the Morning Show and someone who is in charge, but seemingly in name only. I can't believe it has taken us so long to find this utterly fabulous TV show.<p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Amazing Misadventures</span></i></b></p><p>Regular readers of my culture blogs will know that while I have a soft spot for George Clarke's programmes, I also find him irritating and his shows incredibly formulaic. Most Christmases George (and usually Will Hardy, his mate) go somewhere to look at fancy houses and amazing structures, usually somewhere cold and snowy. This time around George is on his own, in a complete series and he's travelling the USA, not only to look at the architecture but also in search of Americana and have a bit of a travelogue at the same time. Regular readers will also know that over the last year my opinion of Americans has dipped to an all-time low...</p><p><b></b></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgzjEZZ8Z6AxhK9iqa34HvDqcCc59ec0QzdI4HB8_b-j1llDp8RX6xUgIyL2v_uvsQpqIvT1W2VJE2YumOHgudOzx1HA0i05Iov_XAX2rVZZcQkcxGMZNzd87BYeZ09sETqc_5Z0ngCNhoecOMQYoOVc2YmBVUC44iHUhZsQnyYfum9T0vrOeZ5ikS2LKcL" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="266" data-original-width="474" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgzjEZZ8Z6AxhK9iqa34HvDqcCc59ec0QzdI4HB8_b-j1llDp8RX6xUgIyL2v_uvsQpqIvT1W2VJE2YumOHgudOzx1HA0i05Iov_XAX2rVZZcQkcxGMZNzd87BYeZ09sETqc_5Z0ngCNhoecOMQYoOVc2YmBVUC44iHUhZsQnyYfum9T0vrOeZ5ikS2LKcL" width="320" /></a></b></div><b>George Clarke's Adventures in America</b> hasn't done anything to change that opinion, especially as it seems to be more about oddball characters than the thing we associate him with more than anything else - amazing spaces.<p></p><p>George tries his hand at historical commentary and social opinion here and he should stick to knocking down walls. He doesn't do a very good job of looking or sounding sincere about the horrors of slavery - although I'm sure he was - and he looked like a crawfish out of water with the Cajuns in Louisiana. However, it was when he got to Texas that I wondered if Channel 4 had made a monumental fubar as he spent more time getting a Stetson made, going to a rodeo and spending a huge amount of time in the country's biggest man cave stuffed to the gills with Americana that just smacked of privilege and money and oddly enough he seemed more at home there than anywhere else. The congenial Geordie just isn't, say. Simon Reeve, he's not even in Robson Green's league; he's just a big bloke who says 'amazing' a lot and gets by with his winning smile and his lack of personality. At least there wasn't people going over budget here, not that that would happen in such a diametrically disparate country as the USA; a place where 80% of the people who get made bankrupt do so because of unpaid medical bills. He looks like he has a great time, I no longer understand how anyone can go to that country and enjoy a place that is just fascism hidden behind a lie and if things go the way they're going these fuckwits are going to elect Trump again. The Yellowstone Caldera can't erupt soon enough... </p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">A Horror Show</span></i></b></p><p>The second episode of <b>True Detective: Night Country</b> has a real wtf opening, one which leaves you wondering if you've just wandered into a detective version of The Thing. It is full on horror and one of the most disturbing things I've seen on telly for months.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjns3gYcBGYEj-he6XYQ4OZFXhO5dA2wJHfX-1bR6JutS5_rp3MgVNPA9-HAJk41AD1d1p-PMw96nh7TKDKQSjo6ydSvCA5SFBXB1--KVsY3pffzcfuQV4wzETWLcYX_jhiIhiCbEv7iKIG0BudM1eaiEuies6zOIhen1B6bCGcc_TwTX0qwo6VK-tud2VF" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="316" data-original-width="474" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjns3gYcBGYEj-he6XYQ4OZFXhO5dA2wJHfX-1bR6JutS5_rp3MgVNPA9-HAJk41AD1d1p-PMw96nh7TKDKQSjo6ydSvCA5SFBXB1--KVsY3pffzcfuQV4wzETWLcYX_jhiIhiCbEv7iKIG0BudM1eaiEuies6zOIhen1B6bCGcc_TwTX0qwo6VK-tud2VF" width="320" /></a></div>However, as the episode progressed with Jodie Foster's Danvers continuing to piss off almost everyone she comes into contact with I started to get an idea about what I was watching and what happened in this puzzling mystery. In fact my theory could spoil it for you so you might want to skip the rest of this review...<p></p><p>First off, this links back to the first season by virtue of a tattoo and secondly, you might remember I reviewed a film last autumn called <b>Wind River</b>, with Elisabeth Olsen and Jeremy Renner, about the death(s) of a (two) Native American girl(s)? In that, the (second) girl in question died of the cold after running away from something over two miles from where she was found; she had been raped and badly beaten but had actually died from exposure. The FBI cop - Olsen - and tracker who was also a friend of the girl - Renner - trace the killing back to an oil refinery station where it soon became obvious that the remaining people there were responsible for the girl's death and her boyfriend who was killed to keep him quiet about the horrible event. In <b>Night Country</b> there might be a lot of mystic mumbo jumbo but the missing research centre person - the one who seems to have gone mad - was the boyfriend of the woman killed five years prior to this spate of horrendous deaths; he has a tattoo like the dead woman and I think he's led these other men to their deaths because they're responsible for the original murder and he's getting his revenge. if I'm right, this is not only a cop out, but is also lazy TV making dressed up as something fabulous - which it is, if it isn't what I've just theorised. Time will tell...</p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Next Week...</span> </i></b></p><p>Our schedule is pretty much going to be devoted to <b>The Morning Show</b>, the rest of season one and maybe the start of season two. <b>Night Country</b> is going to feature, especially as I try to work out if this is just a re-tread of an old film and I might review the next stage of George Clarke's embarrassing USA journey. Of course, something new might pop up, but one thing is unlikely to change, we won't be watching (IMHO) shite like The Traitors or Gladiators, because we're funny like that...</p><p>Besides, having shorter, pithier blogs might be the way forward at the moment; you don't have to feel like you're wading through tons of stuff to see if I'm reviewing anything you'd watch. </p><p><br /></p><p><br /></p><p><br /></p><p><br /></p><p><br /></p>Phil Hallhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12680058800847509275noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5979663737404474935.post-90345204917068107422024-01-22T00:03:00.001+00:002024-01-22T00:03:03.436+00:00TV Culture - Desperate Measures<p><i>Spoilers, potentially</i> </p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Ice Ages</span></i></b></p><p>We gave up with <b>True Detective</b> about halfway through season two, mainly because it wasn't a patch on the brilliant first series and we never watched the third series probably because it slipped under the radar. However, there has been so much written about season four, subtitled <i>Night Country</i> that we decided to give it a go. One of the places that was raving about it was our old friend The Guardian that managed to give it a 5 star rating based on just one episode.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhDfvdA6cxHN4gprfmW67TMbwlrvXPv8VxDlcbTUcx_oXusITKulw15T1miyp7FFIicJJphUcYHKRxPn0NBmxDqDbwUtAzwbku_NO_21LJxoDNMM5aPqJsfEezGuqHeF2a-X-9FFHJT_EdLBZ0lqZUrJE8s4-eQlskuQmDOwdfMpbOBKkqcgvfB0EdCsKEq" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="237" data-original-width="474" height="160" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhDfvdA6cxHN4gprfmW67TMbwlrvXPv8VxDlcbTUcx_oXusITKulw15T1miyp7FFIicJJphUcYHKRxPn0NBmxDqDbwUtAzwbku_NO_21LJxoDNMM5aPqJsfEezGuqHeF2a-X-9FFHJT_EdLBZ0lqZUrJE8s4-eQlskuQmDOwdfMpbOBKkqcgvfB0EdCsKEq" width="320" /></a></div>I checked their review of this and came to the conclusion that they did indeed base their five stars on one single episode, which, while very good, probably didn't warrant top marks - thus making me wonder (yet again) if they get paid to praise things. This is about a small town in northern Alaska that is just entering a period where the sun never comes up - think <b>30 Days of Night</b>, except in reality it's about two weeks. A delivery driver arrives at a research facility manned, usually, by six men but the place is empty and has a Marie Celeste vibe going on, apart from a severed woman's tongue on the floor. Enter the chief of police, played by Jodie Foster and pretty much the rest of the episode was spent introducing us to the complicated relationships and characters that make up the town of Ennis. In fact, so much time is spent on the people connected to chief Liz Danvers and her former detective, now a State Trooper, Evangeline Navarro - played by Kali Reis - that you almost forget about the six missing men until a dead man shows a woman where their bodies are at the end of the first episode.<p></p><p>This is very much feeling like a supernatural murder mystery rather than a crime that needs solving from the first hour and there is going to be so many important peripheral characters and stories it's going to probably need a score card to keep up, but it is intriguing, especially as Navarro is hurting about the death of an Inuit woman from five years earlier that has never been solved and believes that what has happened at the research station <i>might</i> be related to it - why isn't explained, yet, but it certainly seems that the woman's tongue is a link to this unsolved mothballed case. One thing this new story does do well is paint a picture of how dysfunctional and potentially awful it is living inside the Arctic Circle in Alaska during a bleak winter. I expect this will become must see viewing over the coming weeks and a welcome addition to the empty schedules.<br /></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">More Detective Shenanigans</span></i></b></p><p>It seems that the theme for new TV in January 2024 is detectives - perhaps the trend over the last couple of years for true crime podcasts and the like has given people the idea that detective TV is in vogue again, when really it's never ever gone away. This time around is <b>Death and Other Details</b>, which I thought started intriguingly, but it appears the wife found it tough going and almost fell asleep. Maybe I need to watch things on my own at times...</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjReucUOsYGDlZ6T9x-jJtdbS9wBxyiHLz2vvHPs-NH21HTwHhdosH5ifp81cdI5f0kjstyx9HPnqTJQtrluzNDOVCzjfJcX0owz8-yXjeWXcdmM-5y8eaf5NTkWgjkW_7eIeuwhNvZNINBE0RX4g6hRvRQ9gynYNtqvjewDGXnhJ3l2t9B7Sl2__IsMKtm" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="237" data-original-width="474" height="160" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjReucUOsYGDlZ6T9x-jJtdbS9wBxyiHLz2vvHPs-NH21HTwHhdosH5ifp81cdI5f0kjstyx9HPnqTJQtrluzNDOVCzjfJcX0owz8-yXjeWXcdmM-5y8eaf5NTkWgjkW_7eIeuwhNvZNINBE0RX4g6hRvRQ9gynYNtqvjewDGXnhJ3l2t9B7Sl2__IsMKtm" width="320" /></a></div>To be fair, I didn't really know what to make of it. it's set in contemporary times but on board a cruise liner with a pre-1950s feel. Mandy Patinkin plays a world famous (English?) detective who has been on the slide and Violett Beane as the girl who he failed to help 18 years earlier but is now, seemingly, back in her life not only to solve a murder on the ship but also to find out who blew her mother to bits. This has the feel of a kind of Agatha Christie mystery, but with much more sex and swearing than you'd ever imagine; in fact within ten minutes there's a cunnilingus scene that I expect no one saw, erm, coming, which firmly placed the series on a different footing than maybe it looked like it was heading. I was quite impressed with the premise and the fact that there doesn't appear to be anyone on this ship without some kind of a mystery or a skeleton in their closet - but then again, none of these things ever have 'innocents' in them, they're always packed to the rafters with potential victims and villains. The wife said she'd give the second episode a try, I suppose it's the most I can expect...<div><p>So... we watched the second episode and we both agreed when it had finished that we wouldn't bother with a third. It's not often I agree with IMDB on things, but this was an 8.5 when I downloaded it and was 6.8 when we started watching it and I think that's a fair estimation and I expect it will sink lower. It's another one of those 'I don't give a shit about any of the characters and their rich privileged lifestyles'. I disagree with the critics opinion of Mandy Patinkin's English accent; it does sound very English, it just doesn't have an accent; it's just how you'd imagine a Englishman to speak if you didn't come from England. </p><p>The thing about this series is there just seems to be too much padding, too much trying to be clever and too much unnecessary sex in it - I used to like shows with too much unnecessary sex in them, but now it just feels like a way to get people watching; I find it exploitative. The main problem with the story is like all detective stories everyone either has a motive or a reason for the murder of Imogene's mother and the murder of the man on the boat and I'd like some twists on old stereotypes, this doesn't have it. I don't think it has any staying power which is why we're not staying with it...</p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">First Time Out</span></i></b></p><p>For a bit of added nostalgia we watched the very first episode of <b>QI</b>, from 22 years ago, it had Danny Baker (now disgraced), John Sessions (dead), Hugh Laurie (massively huge in a famous kind of way) and a very youthful and squeaky Allan Davies, all overseen by a thin and equally youthful Stephen Fry. It was all very mannered with no screens and a distinctly <i>Ask the Family </i>vibe, oh and you understood the scoring. Baker was annoyingly clever; Sessions knew far too much and should have won, Laurie was surprisingly reticent and Davies was... well, Davies but squeakier. It probably took a few years to forge the madness that made it such a popular series for so long. It was fun watching it though and we're going to watch the rest of the A series because it's been so long since we saw it we cant remember anything at all.</p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Sheer Heart Attack</span></i></b></p><p>Our dip into the BBC archives continues with the fabulous 1994 series <b>Cardiac Arrest</b>, which while a wee bit dated still packs a punch and makes you realise that not a lot has changed in the NHS in 30 years, 18 of them under Tory rule. We polished off the first series in two sittings.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjRfsi55hkB56cWOQfmHhIdYMyohodBOk8JTpRHMnAWJf53y0K0gyjmEr1BkA-2EPQcUYHqvyZc4emuZRo7VtF4aT6kabsSy_X2mKCeUGKWvn2-qYsjSDdcf_al2ffHul2e06e_aOkJI2bVvFZ_LWECFG3DqSC5Vkkt2fCcZIAv2SdkmHU2r5YAe6eIlJ9z" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="450" data-original-width="800" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjRfsi55hkB56cWOQfmHhIdYMyohodBOk8JTpRHMnAWJf53y0K0gyjmEr1BkA-2EPQcUYHqvyZc4emuZRo7VtF4aT6kabsSy_X2mKCeUGKWvn2-qYsjSDdcf_al2ffHul2e06e_aOkJI2bVvFZ_LWECFG3DqSC5Vkkt2fCcZIAv2SdkmHU2r5YAe6eIlJ9z" width="320" /></a></div>Starring - among others - Andrew Lancel, Helen Baxendale and Ace Bhatti, it essentially follows the misadventures of various doctors from junior to consultant and the various stages of arsehole they become. It is hard-hitting, funny and extremely realistic - a kind of Carry On Doctor for the age. It was TV-meister Jed Mercurio's first TV series and if you didn't know he was a doctor before becoming a TV script writer you do now. This is a rude and no holds barred TV show that shocked a lot of people back in the 1990s but also attracted a large following, making it one of the most respected medical dramas the Corporation ever did. I expect things haven't changed for many doctors in 2024 and you quickly decide who you like, who you hate and who you'd like to see get punched by the poor bastards on the end of their arseholery. Classic stuff.<br /><p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Bloody Hell</span></i></b></p><p>He's back! The nicest man on TV is travelling the world again for our entertainment. <b>Wilderness with Simon Reeve</b> is a new four-part documentary series with the fantastic Reeve venturing into some of the remotest parts of the planet in search of stories that no one else bothers with. </p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgHdJWJDsAiZjQrJgpFTWsKAWNikpGo2thCPX5CALhw7zBiuLsr43EH5k1cYFv0Y9jTJMApldHzt2fn4mngR9-77L12r5qr6DjM0rOhndzX-lMtKTSQ9Stk8AUo77YcqioGd_QOJkU7mxIJpUiSYOmoiU599Eldpi-ClJ68ZWWabmgB7vL_yY-UtEWUOmBO" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="266" data-original-width="474" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgHdJWJDsAiZjQrJgpFTWsKAWNikpGo2thCPX5CALhw7zBiuLsr43EH5k1cYFv0Y9jTJMApldHzt2fn4mngR9-77L12r5qr6DjM0rOhndzX-lMtKTSQ9Stk8AUo77YcqioGd_QOJkU7mxIJpUiSYOmoiU599Eldpi-ClJ68ZWWabmgB7vL_yY-UtEWUOmBO" width="320" /></a></div>This first episode he's in the Congo Basin, the vast, second largest rain forest on the planet and a place that, oddly enough, I was only thinking a few weeks ago appears to be one of those places that no one visits and good old Simon pops up there. However, instead of his usual cutting edge reporting, this was more about crossing one of the most inhospitable jungles on the planet and meeting some indigenous tribes that frankly deserve to live on earth a lot more than probably anyone else and, of course, Simon is just so bloody nice that everyone wants to mother him.<p></p><p>If I've never told you this before, the wife and I have a competition with Reeve's programmes, it's called The Bloody Hell Count, because Simon says 'bloody hell' an awful lot, so each new episode we watch, we both have a guess to how many bloody hells he'll say with whoever gets it right winning and getting to guess first next week; if neither of us get it right then whoever guessed first guesses second next. Don't tell me no one else does this? I just won't believe you. This week: I guessed One bloody hell, the wife guessed two bloody hells and there was a total of three bloody hells (not including any bloody hells that are said in the preamble before each episode starts, because there's one in that). We both know that next week's episode, in the Andes, already has one bloody hell in it, so I'm guessing first and I'm stuck with thinking that might be the only one or could there be more. I mean, if there was three this week there's a good chance he won't want to use up his quota of bloody hells or equally if everyone does the Bloody Hell game he might try to equal his record of four or even go for five or more... Honestly, his shows are bloody brilliant and if you don't watch them you bloody well should!</p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Next Time...</span></i></b></p><p>You can probably work most of it out for yourself - what we are carrying on watching plus whatever happens along to fill the voids, which, as I said last week, isn't looking too full a schedule. I'm sure many of you would have no problem with a streamlined TV review blog for a few weeks/months, especially how bloated they became at times last year. </p></div>Phil Hallhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12680058800847509275noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5979663737404474935.post-30114147916419435562024-01-20T10:15:00.001+00:002024-01-20T10:15:39.677+00:00Film Culture - A Mixed Bag <p><i>As most of the films reviewed are old then bollocks to your spoilers. If a new film is reviewed then I won't spoil it for you unless it's shite, therefore saving you from having to watch it.</i></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Being Rimmed</span></i></b></p><p>What I find really hypocritical is that people can slag off <b>Rebel Moon</b> like it's this uniquely awful film (which it isn't, but I can see why certain people would think that) and yet somehow <b>Pacific Rim</b> gets a free pass from major criticism. I mean, yes, it's not exactly something that has been done before; there is a uniqueness about it in terms of films made anywhere other than Japan, but it is an absolute load of testosterone fuelled bollocks.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjJnKTGpO8QVYEHg3L6fopRznsguRuWD4BfEDxoh7ZC5-Fs4Ua15m997bSX8UMoiaqFXQLBq8keDP227hfO0VbU-7XwczVxiHfskjYwV_J-8cQcu7r7X2pq658YWlK-JgfAr0F-_RnrR8YPcgHcNEiMbFtULxJ_97gEu6rOVO0xWLI1uEehwNEXrfRK6HpW" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="266" data-original-width="474" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjJnKTGpO8QVYEHg3L6fopRznsguRuWD4BfEDxoh7ZC5-Fs4Ua15m997bSX8UMoiaqFXQLBq8keDP227hfO0VbU-7XwczVxiHfskjYwV_J-8cQcu7r7X2pq658YWlK-JgfAr0F-_RnrR8YPcgHcNEiMbFtULxJ_97gEu6rOVO0xWLI1uEehwNEXrfRK6HpW" width="320" /></a></div>The special effects are awesome. The idea of a giant robot beating a giant monster with a ship is brilliant, but other than that... people complain about Marvel films? This is a Guillermo Del Toro movie; he's a fucking fantasy auteur; his films are usually viewed with wonder and awe even if they're complete manky testicles. This film was also the first to spotlight Charlie Hunnam's complete and utter inability to do accents; his USA accent in this wavers about and sounds vaguely Geordie sometimes and even the Northern Irish he so badly mastered in <b>Rebel Moon</b>. He is also not a very good actor, which begs the question of how he's become such a busy actor. The crazy thing about <b>Pacific Rim</b> is it's actually a comedy; despite untold destruction, loss of life, bonkers violence and the Chinese Kaiju Mafia. I don't think it was intended to be a comedy, mainly because it's absolutely and utterly unfunny, but the double act of Burn Gorman and Charlie Day was so bad, in a comedic kind of way, that no one in their right mind would take it seriously. I mean, if you're going to have a serious sci-fi film, you don't have Laurel and fucking Hardy as your two key scientists...<p></p><p>It's just a long fight scene with some exposition and back story thrown in to pad it out and as I said to the wife; we had Cloverfield in 2008, Godzilla in 2014 and this in 2013, despite big fuck off monsters, giant robots and other stuff I can't be arsed to think about, giant monster movies didn't really take off; even the Godzilla/Kong franchises have largely had a cult following and can't be called box office gold. Big monster films pretty much don't have much going for them after you've had them fight each other or fight giant robots - they're essentially boxing films crossed with Mexican wrestling on acid. <b>Pacific Rim</b> does have Idris Elba delivering his 'Today we're cancelling the apocalypse' speech, which is not Shakespeare and sounds like something someone would say in South London, but other than that it's just a giant robot beating the shit out of a monster with a ship and nowt else.<br /></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Connexion FranΓ§aise Un</span></i></b></p><p>Classed as one of the all-time classic films, the seminal 1971 movie <b>The French Connection</b> hasn't dated well, although as a snapshot of New York in 1970 it's probably quite accurate. Filmed in an almost documentary style, this is a feature that is stark and grainy with a relatively simple story that unfolds over one hour and forty five minutes.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgKZSzCpzg6WjmlEjuTzTLJpY0FTH9VaRCTYu1v6-jvAimvluv6ko7qHQBhXNkxjomw2vSUtoKz_LUdxgcxm3YXPZi7uCjvQdJd2T-c8O5LKgVWo5k4CSp_gP-efqVxFvrUViLoLu6cBw8ZnrOJWPRlGvawFvaXOIgQW7pCBvPRsnLz9HtocZUhVtm6uFrn" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="667" data-original-width="1029" height="207" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgKZSzCpzg6WjmlEjuTzTLJpY0FTH9VaRCTYu1v6-jvAimvluv6ko7qHQBhXNkxjomw2vSUtoKz_LUdxgcxm3YXPZi7uCjvQdJd2T-c8O5LKgVWo5k4CSp_gP-efqVxFvrUViLoLu6cBw8ZnrOJWPRlGvawFvaXOIgQW7pCBvPRsnLz9HtocZUhVtm6uFrn" width="320" /></a></div>One of the first things you notice is just how young Gene Hackman looks and just what a callous, racist bigot his character 'Popeye' Doyle is. His partner in the film is Roy Scheider - he of Jaws fame - as 'Cloudy' Russo, who also acts as Popeye's conscious. This isn't a loveable film; filmed throughout the harsh New York winter of 1969/70 it does nothing at all to glamorise police work and instead focuses on just how mundane and boring the job can be and how a lot of police work was done on hunches and gut feelings. Fernando Rey plays 'the French connection' - a Marseilles-based heroin dealer trying to break into the US market, which has had a drought for months. Tony Lo Bianco plays the chameleon like Boca negotiating the deal and it's all directed in a distant, almost uninterested way by the brilliant William Friedkin, which is probably why it feels like a documentary at times. There is no real back story; we don't learn about the characters lives or loves, especially the cops, and the lines are blurred between good and bad guys - such as when the two French dealers are fine dining in a top class French restaurant, while Doyle and Russo are freezing their arses off over the street and grabbing pizza slices and lukewarm coffee.<p></p><p>There is a lot to admire about the film, but ultimately it doesn't deliver a fulfilling ending; for all the meticulous planning, the denouement is half-arsed and the main antagonist escapes and it's probably extremely indicative of what really used to happen in the drug squads of major US cities all the time. It might be a classic, but it no longer feel compelling viewing and from a personal observation, the wife struggled to stay interested in it or awake.<br /></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Calling Occupants...</span> </i></b></p><p>It's been a while since we watched <b>Contact</b>. I asked the wife to buy me the book for Christmas as I used to have it, read it way back when it was released and wanted to read it again. The film won't spoil it because the book is a bit different from the film, which considering it was a late 90s Robert Zemeckis film seemed to struggle a little with the special effects and did another excellent job of showing us all what a monumental fuck up it would be if aliens came to earth and the Yanks were allowed to deal with it. There's this amazing thing about alien contact films that suggests the 'hoisted by their own petard' Americans would seriously consider anyone able to travel here from billions of miles away some how inferior to us or would be scared of their bullets and bombs. I think only <b>Close Encounters of the Third Kind</b> is probably the only big budget 'alien contact' film that hasn't had some American trying to kill an alien, blow up their ship or sabotage events - it's enlightening that filmmakers not only understand this but include it in their films, but if we really aren't alone, we're going to be stone age man compared to visitors and we should probably be a little more humble and less hot headed - James Woods character - Michael Kitz, chief security advisor to the President - in this was the epitome of shoot first and ask questions if we can be arsed.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiN6riCBD2fmtXxxC03zrioXkJn3XdqPYHftZRyiP3rw5xstxXoUbdBpJJJfyl2p000uvxLFuNHxGY2Q3lCAQw9N3EWYyAAA0_FWGVOU2YjKDDV5wPSQfqlvLsMN8PaJC2499-EOUUeu1kT6bE1_O9UJe1KPxStZsE-3ezpaeOwz5Vc6MzU_Z5mS4QLcB-a" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="618" data-original-width="1100" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiN6riCBD2fmtXxxC03zrioXkJn3XdqPYHftZRyiP3rw5xstxXoUbdBpJJJfyl2p000uvxLFuNHxGY2Q3lCAQw9N3EWYyAAA0_FWGVOU2YjKDDV5wPSQfqlvLsMN8PaJC2499-EOUUeu1kT6bE1_O9UJe1KPxStZsE-3ezpaeOwz5Vc6MzU_Z5mS4QLcB-a" width="320" /></a></div>Jodie Foster plays the astrophysicist who discovers the signal from an alien race while scanning the stars for signs of life and then becomes a bystander as far more 'important' people take over. There's a whole bunch of famous co-stars including James Woods, Matthew McConaughey, John Hurt, Angela Bassett, David Morse, Rob Lowe and Tom Skerritt (reuniting Hurt and Skerritt from <b>Alien</b>) and it's a good film, yet somehow manages to be less warm than the book, which was the brilliant super-astronomer Carl Sagan's only fiction novel. I often wonder what possible directors would make of this if it was made again in the 2020s, because this was obviously hampered by technology both in a studio and in the real world. The way of journeying to the stars was innovative and the scepticism was handled well, but... it needed to be like <b>Independence Day</b> and have fictional politicians and not be set in a world that existed where this didn't happen.<p></p>I have to say that however brilliant Jodie Foster is as an actor, she does have this coldness about her that I think didn't lend to her performance as Ellie Arroway, who needed to be warmer and more passionate than she was depicted.<div><p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Comedy Balls</span></i></b></p><p>Taika Waititi makes comedy films; some are successful, some are hit and miss and some bomb. He became popular with Marvel for his Thor films - one which was excellent and another that was shit. He is the epitome of up and down and his latest film - for Amazon - <b>Next Goal Wins</b> is a heavily fictionalised version of a true story about the American Samoa football team's attempts at... well scoring a goal, let alone winning a football match.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhBS89jg57DIMBFzhaC3S8A4JQhk6oNV-Rptf5DC0iWcelY-oyRio6X7xt7AlT9jttNC3wCarvwgX2rdkfL5euGqoqxHyelizmRhxdQAF2QxTGTTvxIFR9qEMQUOuk6Fc060A0YFoUSeP69Onto51riJ_-QGD2SaExkbFf2rpHnpkT7anah5plyCv7jMl4y" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="700" data-original-width="1400" height="160" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhBS89jg57DIMBFzhaC3S8A4JQhk6oNV-Rptf5DC0iWcelY-oyRio6X7xt7AlT9jttNC3wCarvwgX2rdkfL5euGqoqxHyelizmRhxdQAF2QxTGTTvxIFR9qEMQUOuk6Fc060A0YFoUSeP69Onto51riJ_-QGD2SaExkbFf2rpHnpkT7anah5plyCv7jMl4y" width="320" /></a></div>If you know the story of Thomas Rongen - played here by Michael Fassbinder - you'd know that much of the story of this film has been tampered with to make it 'better' and to be fair to Waititi, he literally tells us this right at the beginning of the movie. However, it only sticks to some of the facts, even if it embellishes most of them and makes up a load of others. Yet it managed to give me more LOL moments than a lot of things over the last few weeks and it certainly is a proper feelgood film that doesn't so much have a happy ending as a fitting one. Fassbinder sort of phones in his performance and as a Dutch American he sounds very Irish at times; I expect most of the Samoan actors were amateurs but they were great and the entire idea of a team of misfits kind of doing this football thing for the pride of their island really works, even if American Samoa had to take on a slight comedy island persona to help make the film flow - which they apparently were not happy about. It isn't a masterpiece, but it is a film that should leave you happy you've watched it. As a football fan there are many liberties taken, but I can live with that because at the end of the film I was glad I watched it. <br /><p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Total Relentlessness</span></i></b></p><p>Remember Arnie's <b>Total Recall</b>? Well, the 2012 remake with Colin Farrell, Kate Beckinsale and Jessica Biel is a much better film, despite what the IMDB rating suggests. This version is an absolutely relentless action sci-fi thriller that really doesn't hang around and whizzes through its near two hour run time like an express train. It's full of dead ends, red herrings and characters you think are important that turn out to be expendable or not as relevant as you might think and unlike the original you get a much more coherent story and a 'wife' who isn't killed off promptly. In this, "Quaid's" wife - Beckinsale - is a relentless killing machine who isn't playing by her orders because she is somehow pissed off with her assignment and then with her boss for giving her <i>this</i> assignment.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjsl1as-9GLBUdhuIjDixGDOCdh3Z6399Ta6Y10sGw0A6zK2N8LO-dvH2mnbYal2PNXfjQPNPFzLtLKZPenSyI-cF4XLppl_6RMqPsLB74f9dVOp4CiVnhhWUE1q-D8iahfSnEaT9sKbY7MV_2wYARC0dvBu032-bXLoi9G5w_6lh59_1E5Ph0pRQBAyFoE" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="1277" data-original-width="1920" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjsl1as-9GLBUdhuIjDixGDOCdh3Z6399Ta6Y10sGw0A6zK2N8LO-dvH2mnbYal2PNXfjQPNPFzLtLKZPenSyI-cF4XLppl_6RMqPsLB74f9dVOp4CiVnhhWUE1q-D8iahfSnEaT9sKbY7MV_2wYARC0dvBu032-bXLoi9G5w_6lh59_1E5Ph0pRQBAyFoE" width="320" /></a></div>There is a slight amount of corniness and it's got a very British feel to it, but the special effects are excellent, the film has a real Bladerunner feel to it and there are a lot more twists and turns than the original, which really did have awful corny moments. Whether Farrell makes a decent action/adventure hero is a difficult one, especially as he's now too old for that kind of role, but he isn't bad in this. In fact, the only actor who I felt struggled was Beckinsale, who you would have thought might have learned something about film acting from her Underpants films... Oh yeah... How silly of me? Some parts I had problems with, but I expect this stayed closer to the book than the 1990 Arnie film; I just wonder why it was made at all. The movie also has cameos from Bill Nighy, Bryan Cranston, John Cho and Bokeem Woodbine, who might have been a bit of a drag... [I thenk ewe, I'm here all the time...]<p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Self-Importance</span></i></b></p><p>Every time I see Jake Johnson I think he's Oscar Isaac's long lost brother and while he's never been in anything I can say I've truly hated, he's also not been in much I really like - apart from <b>Safety Not Guaranteed</b>, which I think is a cracking film and he's really good in that, even if he's playing a self-obsessed arsehole.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEi3Fcxj_aoVdTOAUx73A7vOtCgVPvdrjJa_ddzpaJsn-IQoymv1BYC9fGveGjK0yEQb8IWbl6i8rDiinxz4XucBWGVrOpMWYcJeuyf2mUokekDxH3F9a71NXQCNl_bHyoZiVt6s8zHE7aCaNhD5howImncWTI3Qr9gHckFn8UXYvzJQOpF76-CaIyRrmFXx" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="248" data-original-width="474" height="167" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEi3Fcxj_aoVdTOAUx73A7vOtCgVPvdrjJa_ddzpaJsn-IQoymv1BYC9fGveGjK0yEQb8IWbl6i8rDiinxz4XucBWGVrOpMWYcJeuyf2mUokekDxH3F9a71NXQCNl_bHyoZiVt6s8zHE7aCaNhD5howImncWTI3Qr9gHckFn8UXYvzJQOpF76-CaIyRrmFXx" width="320" /></a></div><b>Self Reliance</b> is a film written, directed and starring Johnson and while it's not a bad movie, it also doesn't feel like a fully thought out concept and the predictable bits were very and the other bits were weird but didn't feel weird enough. It's a bit of a curate's egg type of thing... Johnson plays Tommy, a man fast approaching 40 who seems to have a pretty dull life that has a routine that he's happy sticking with. He's two years out of a long time relationship, his family are worried about him and out of the blue US comedian Andy Samberg turns up - playing himself - offering Tommy the chance to change his life by getting involved in a reality TV show that's shown on the Dark Web. All he has to do is survive 30 days without one of the show's hired assassins killing him and he wins a cool million dollars. He even has a loop hole, he has to be alone when he will be killed, so if he can spend all of that time with someone he can't be touched.<br /><p></p><p>The problem is everyone thinks he's lost it; no one wants to spend every waking moment with him and he grows increasingly more paranoid every day as he closes in on 30 days. Are the people stalking him just in his mind; has he imagined everything? Was Andy Samberg really there? Is he really being filmed 24/7 with micro cameras? Is he actually going slowly mad because of his life which seems to be a massive failure? Even the denouement could all be in his head and while there is a final scene that seems to confirm he went through everything by the time we reach it the joke has worn thin and maybe it wasn't such a good idea after all. </p><p>Anna Kendrick plays Maddy, a desperately lonely woman who poses as another person in the game, but she finally gets cold feet when they meet an alleged other game player who essentially scares the shit out of her because she thought Tommy was just a needy man who was falling for her and not really on the run from assassins. There's also a number of 'ninjas' in it, people in fancy dress who may or may not be killers and heaps of paranoia and deranged shit. But considering it weighs in at just under 90 minutes you're kind of wishing it ended quicker and not necessarily for a conclusion, more... to just have it end. It actually gets a little boring and a little too needy; like Tommy's problems have transferred into the film and it needs to be liked as much as he does. It kind of fizzles out like a can of coke left open all night; there's little effervescence left when it all concludes.</p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Lacking in Dungeons not Dragons</span></i></b></p><p>I suppose the most memorable thing about last year's <b>Dungeons & Dragons: Honour Among Thieves</b> was the fact it was such an enjoyable romp; probably the most entertaining fantasy comedy since <b>The Princess Bride</b> (which, I have to admit, I've never had much time for). But as the subhead says, it didn't have many dungeons - none, really. It did have at least two dragons...</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgmSqEztnFmW60Xx6eP9ZOtIAPoONpeCOM5h2GzqtUTnl-9Eacc8eo_wqZATqHqZwYBV3ju-OKS6QH6Xzhm6IwKn1I5Y6SXm58UNCyzfCmwVFtSSW94UAMsSFUUAt5UeJjhk96whc4Z9HLlHVpTRmlY1Wtq3QrE5XX5rTWplFeCAN19vv3BKwDsqRz94RRG" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="900" data-original-width="1600" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgmSqEztnFmW60Xx6eP9ZOtIAPoONpeCOM5h2GzqtUTnl-9Eacc8eo_wqZATqHqZwYBV3ju-OKS6QH6Xzhm6IwKn1I5Y6SXm58UNCyzfCmwVFtSSW94UAMsSFUUAt5UeJjhk96whc4Z9HLlHVpTRmlY1Wtq3QrE5XX5rTWplFeCAN19vv3BKwDsqRz94RRG" width="320" /></a></div>Chris Pine, who has never really been any good as anyone other than Captain Kirk (mkII) still felt like his role as Ed could have been done by anyone else, but he was all right. Michelle Rodriguez was also okay as Holga, Ed's right hand woman, with a penchant for small men, but neither lead characters felt like they were the first people approached for their respective roles, I might be wrong, but they did seem like strange bits of casting. However, the film was very good; it went along at a cracking pace, had some genuinely funny bits in it and Hugh Grant is always a good value for money villain, even if he was really just a stooge for Daisy Head's Sofina - a red witch hell bent on revenge for her ancestors.<p></p><p>Essentially it's a film about a band of thieves who try one job that was too big for them and Pine and Rodriguez get caught and slapped into prison, which they escape from and go in search of Pine's daughter and the other members of their band only to discover that Grant's character has become the head of a large kingdom and the daughter has been brainwashed into thinking her father is a shit dad. From this point on it's about retrieving stuff to help them get their revenge on Grant, running across assassins, ghosts of ancestors and a fat dragon in the underworld, which added extra comedy. I have to admit it was enjoyable in a throwaway kind of way, the special effects weren't bad, but some of them weren't brilliant and at just over two hours it might have been a teensy bit too long, but I laughed a few times and didn't feel as though I'd wasted my time at the end, which I count as a win at the moment.</p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Coming Up...</span></i></b></p><p>A slightly pointless subhead because I have no idea what might be released this coming week or so, nor do I know what I'm likely to watch on either the Flash Drive of Doom or the magic TV recorder box thingy. Unlike TV - which you wont be seeing a blog about this week - films tend to be random and very much depend on what we fancy, what we've got and whether things I want to see are out yet. For instance, I'd love to see <b>Godzilla Minus One</b>, it has great reviews, a high IMDB rating and looks really good, but there's absolutely no date for a stream to surface and even if one does I want it to have proper subtitles. Oh and we won't be watching <b>Wonka</b> because modern 'musicals' tend to be a load of shit, even if this film has been rated by 'some' critics (and we all know who that 'some' is...).</p><p>We do have last year's animated Spider-Man film to watch, but I get the impression the wife isn't keen, especially as I've had it for six months and she's never said, 'Ooh let's watch that.' There's <b>Napoleon</b>, but frankly I'm in the undecided court about that and <b>Killers of the Flower Moon</b> needs three and a half fucking hours and needs to be riveting. There is a grand total of 39 unwatched films not counting the 15 or so on the TV recorder thing, so it's going to be pot luck between now and the next time this appears (which is likely to be in about two weeks). </p><p><br /></p><p> </p></div>Phil Hallhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12680058800847509275noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5979663737404474935.post-26271764112020539222024-01-16T09:36:00.000+00:002024-01-16T09:36:42.367+00:00Pop Culture - MCU Film Review: The Marvels<p><i>I am going to spoil this for you if you haven't seen it...</i> </p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjt1G6e7-XznGRn594NzUmfOQ8ZciKjHjzqJ1GoXyD2RX7xO6yevfLV84CrK1Il9Y2NLfMSDJfr3fvYbubSOZe_jRaVlu7e5XHZxOaGasutWks0wS1kqdmUu1UKKIq3aOM_TEgeGgIpTTDY9VbHIcEDpG_NUCIYFn5rPcy-XFOWhnYQ5OzHA5QvZBm4DeLZ" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="592" data-original-width="474" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjt1G6e7-XznGRn594NzUmfOQ8ZciKjHjzqJ1GoXyD2RX7xO6yevfLV84CrK1Il9Y2NLfMSDJfr3fvYbubSOZe_jRaVlu7e5XHZxOaGasutWks0wS1kqdmUu1UKKIq3aOM_TEgeGgIpTTDY9VbHIcEDpG_NUCIYFn5rPcy-XFOWhnYQ5OzHA5QvZBm4DeLZ" width="192" /></a></div><b><span style="font-size: large;">The Marvels</span></b><p></p><p>Starring: Brie Larson, Teyonah Parris, Iman Vellani, Zawe Ashton, Samuel L. Jackson, Gary Lewis, Zenobia Shroff, Mohan Kapur, Park Seo-Joon & others<br />Directed by Nia DaCosta<br />Runtime: 105 minutes<br />IMDB Rating (at time of writing) 5.8 - the lowest rated MCU film of them all. A full 0.5 points lower than <b>Eternals</b> (6.3) and an even lower rating than <b>Quantumania </b>(6.1). </p><p><br /></p><p>Here it is - the film that essentially has probably killed it off the MCU as a viable franchise in the future. A film that has grossed just over $200million, effectively costing Disney money to make it, somewhere in the region of the same again and a bit more. Anyhow, moving on... </p><p>I'm genuinely puzzled about this film because there have been worse Marvel films; to be fair, not that many that have been worse, but this is by no means the worst despite its rating. Yes, there's definitely a tonal problem with the film as many critics have pointed out and there's a couple of things I couldn't get my head around, there should never have been the musical number, which in many ways was the turning point in the film because up to that point it was working for me, but other than this it could have been a whole lot worse.</p><p>There was a shortage of plot and not enough back story. Dar-Benn should have been fleshed out a bit more; maybe some context as to who she actually was and why she was doing what she did rather than us find out about it almost by accident about halfway through the film. Also Zawe Ashton exudes about as much menace as Joe Lycett in a dress; she's not a good enough actor or has enough gravitas to carry the role of 'world destroyer' - she was a disappointment.</p><p>However, despite a patchy beginning, it was rolling along at a cracking pace with some lively interaction and what seemed like a half decent story, even if it made little or no sense and it has to be said that Iman Vellani is quite brilliant as Ms Marvel, at least until the end of the film when there was one of the many problems that crept into the movie. There was excellent chemistry between the three main heroes, well maybe not exactly but it worked better than I expected. I kind of struggled with Teyonah Parris's character but probably because she felt almost shoehorned into the film and even her 'origin' garnered a subtle sense of WTF from Carol Danvers when it was explained to her; in fact getting her light powers from walking through a hex created by a 'mutant' witch is probably the lamest origin for a hero (apart from maybe a deaf, dumb, one-legged vigilante getting her powers from a line of Native American ancestors - but let's not go there).</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEh0dqPfv26m0utmJJkAFZHxOKCKMXtyFoFUDIeXyCC7Xdmm0r7SO5Hzog_4JPkK80oYFK7TEYgw7u0wpMPq6XVnf5QO9d2Q_sj04vM4V333LrueQC-M3uldI4fNwgKmPM4LjIWRP6vZKIsNZQE-GRPWi0Z24fX2PRu6iWm-w9h_VoupjhXPkeOJPDfqNjHm" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="633" data-original-width="800" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEh0dqPfv26m0utmJJkAFZHxOKCKMXtyFoFUDIeXyCC7Xdmm0r7SO5Hzog_4JPkK80oYFK7TEYgw7u0wpMPq6XVnf5QO9d2Q_sj04vM4V333LrueQC-M3uldI4fNwgKmPM4LjIWRP6vZKIsNZQE-GRPWi0Z24fX2PRu6iWm-w9h_VoupjhXPkeOJPDfqNjHm" width="303" /></a></div>I was impressed at the amount of Brie Larson on show - and that isn't meant to sound sexist, just that she obviously went on a crash diet for her role as Elizabeth Zott in <b>Lessons in Chemistry</b>, because she looked like a twig with the wood shaved off in that TV series and here she's more like an actual woman. But the show really belongs to Vellani's Ms Marvel who is the comedy, the drama and the heart of a film that was probably too short and focused on the wrong things when it should have focused on the actual story.<br /><p></p><p>There were some things I didn't understand, such as why Valkyrie was in it and how she was going to integrate a bunch of Skrulls into the corner of Norway that New Asgard now lives and how come she's buddies with Carol Danvers when a lot of the tension between Danvers and Monica Rambeau was about Carol not reconnecting with Monica after the blip was reversed. This was probably one of the first plot problems. Another thing was how Dar-Benn could be beaten inside three minutes in the final battle, especially given how difficult it had been earlier and where were all of her henchmen? How come Dar-Benn's reason for saving Hala was based around places that Captain Marvel was connected with - how did she even know this? What happened to the second wristband after Kamala and Carol pumped Monica full of energy to close the rift in dimensional space, which wasn't really explained as to how it happened and why didn't they just reverse it if Kamala could use the two wristbands without destroying herself? What significance the penultimate scene was - have the Khans moved into the old Rambeau house or is Carol setting up home there herself and if so why were the Khans even there? What was the point of Goose in the film and why wasn't all of 'her' eggs explained and why were they there in the first place conveniently producing enough flerkins (or whatever they're called) to help evacuate the space station, which we didn't really get any explanation as to why it suddenly was in so much danger. Then there was Kamala using her powers even though she didn't have her wristband; creating a giant hand to catch Carol after she fought Dar-Benn to the finish. This was either a really awful bit of plotting/filmmaking or she doesn't need her bangle so it doesn't matter what happened to the second one she had been wearing prior to her return to earth...</p><p>The main problem with the film was it had three (well, two and a half) characters who had great chemistry, some promising ideas but all were surrounded by pointless episodic moments, a villain with zero menace and no sense of impending jeopardy. it had a musical number that completely ruined the tone of the film and speaking again of tone - on one hand you have a woman wielding massive amounts of power, destroying planets and being fucking deadly serious and you have three heroes who spend a lot of time farting about, being girls and generally not seeming to take the threat before them very seriously. This is a film that is a mass of contradictions that I cannot believe Marvel and Disney execs didn't see prior to release. How could they allow this film to be released in the form it was without questioning things that even crap critics like me could see from the other side of the fucking universe? Yet... I still didn't think it was as bad as <b>Eternals</b> and was probably more enjoyable than <b>Quantumania</b> or the other unbelievably bad tonal film <b>Thor: Love & Thunder</b>, which is the only superhero film that had cancer as a major subplot and trivialised it to the point of bad taste.</p><p>The problem is this could have been so much better and it felt like someone high up decided to let it be released like this to help facilitate the end of either Kevin Feige or the MCU in general. It does, however, help speed up the end of the superhero film genre for the foreseeable future. Marvel does have <b>Deadpool 3</b> coming out this year - their only cinematic release - and that, if it replicates the first two, won't really be an MCU film; so what we're seeing is no actual MCU films until the summer of 2025 when (and if) the Captain America film comes out. </p><p>Finally, regardless of that last paragraph there is the two finale scenes to deal with. The first 'epilogue' features Kamala recruiting Hailee Steinfeld into her new team - in a kind of nod to Nick Fury recruiting Tony Stark; but it doesn't really work because the new 'Hawkeye' is also another character who simply isn't good enough to carry a feature film... and then there's Monica Rambeau's conclusion as she wakes up in a futuristic hospital room in the presence of her mother, except she's called Binary and if you know your comics you'll know that Binary was who Ms Marvel eventually became and Ms Marvel in Marvel Comics was originally... Carol Danvers. But, of course, that isn't the kicker, it wasn't the real point of the post credit scene, that was Kelsey Grammar's Beast (now fully CGI) who references 'Charles' and we're clearly in a universe where the X-Men (and the Star Jammers) exist. This surely was there for two reasons - one to get the fans really excited and to hopefully get them to forget the mess they'd just watched. The fact the X-Men have been introduced might have been a gambit they thought might sell the film via word of mouth - that clearly hasn't worked; so we're left with a universe that Monica is stuck in that has mutants in it; they're either going to find a way into our/the MCU universe or this is a subplot that has nowhere else to go - exit Monica Rambeau, thanks for your half-hearted contribution. <b>The Marvels</b> - a film that didn't promise much, failed to deliver but somehow with all its faults isn't the worst thing Marvel/Disney has done in the last two years.</p>Phil Hallhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12680058800847509275noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5979663737404474935.post-54343321960077949552024-01-13T09:32:00.000+00:002024-01-13T09:32:13.166+00:00TV Culture - Different Worlds<p><i>Spoiler warnings...</i></p><p><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b><i>Goldilocks on Mars</i></b></span></p><p>There's been a very high bar set by the last two episodes of <b>For All Mankind</b>. The show that I believe has been the most consistently brilliant TV series for the best part of the last five years might have seemed to have run out of steam in the opening few parts of this fourth season, but it certainly did what it had to to re-establish itself as being pretty fucking awesome.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiXdx1E-ZHY6dWfKWM1Bj3Wa3Zype93lhZ0hJXIv2PlTg8i5Lf3B5ygz9jKIIuSdsy7CsyLyEx77P3KYQclnkUFD-SqpAmcKbeESt05KA4J3AnpUmnjhk2QeZtcOgi5EzbMAdC-YBrVYofDQb5dteBfICj9Yef93bgVb0rfhTH_E4OlO2V6rfQfR2IQjp9W" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="266" data-original-width="474" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiXdx1E-ZHY6dWfKWM1Bj3Wa3Zype93lhZ0hJXIv2PlTg8i5Lf3B5ygz9jKIIuSdsy7CsyLyEx77P3KYQclnkUFD-SqpAmcKbeESt05KA4J3AnpUmnjhk2QeZtcOgi5EzbMAdC-YBrVYofDQb5dteBfICj9Yef93bgVb0rfhTH_E4OlO2V6rfQfR2IQjp9W" width="320" /></a></div>What may have seemed like a slight storyline for this season actually might have had the most profound effect on the entire show. The Goldilocks asteroid is worth so much money that it would have guaranteed the M7 nations riches beyond their dreams and would condemn Mars to being just a deserted outpost in an empty galaxy as the space race would effectively be over and the need for exploration and discovery would be gone. So as all the subplots somehow meshed together we saw how humanity can beat countries and corporations for the good of mankind. <p></p><p>This conclusion had pretty much everything - apart from the discovery of life on Mars, in fact, Kelly Baldwin was pretty much reduced to being a supporting character probably only in it because she's Ed's adopted daughter. This was about her father's final battle, about Dani's last hurrah. This was about Dev fulfilling a dream and Aleida making up for something she didn't really do but feeling compelled to do it. And this was about a kind of redemption for Margo; maybe not the one she deserved, but equally the one she deserved and it spelled the end of the road for her wicked Soviet handler and a happy ending for everyone's favourite North Korean. In fact, the finale pretty much covered all the bases without being maudlin and without giving too much away about next season's 2012 story. One imagines that Ed and Dani will have either died or will be so old they're retired off; whether Margo will still be alive in whatever penitentiary she ends up is also up for debate, but I suspect as she was the last voice you heard she's not going to be around to see Happy Valley become one of the richest places in the galaxy. </p><p>I have seen some quite brilliant TV over the last couple of years - <b>The Bear</b>, <b>Lessons in Chemistry</b>, the brilliant ending to <b>Loki</b> and the fabulous <b>Slow Horses</b> - it has been a couple of years of television that blew me away and I'm glad to include <b>For All Mankind</b> in that list - a TV show about the alternate history of the space race and a historical drama as well - it is intelligent science fiction and doesn't need fantasy fiction to make it work. I look forward to some point early in 2025 when season five arrives, any sooner than that and I will be a very happy man.</p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">A Monstrous Mess</span></i></b></p><p>I really don't understand why this series existed in the way it did. why it had to have ludicrous stories with unbelievably dull (modern) characters when it could have told the same story without padding it out with bullshit and crap subplots. It could have been eight episodes of action, adventure and a simple story and it would have worked just as effectively, but instead we had dislikeable people, stupid stories, pointless back stories and sexuality, wanky organisations and some really bad acting.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEj254KQUBD4nFTFqK3c9uoIjNMFwVHabjkNruGwBKx6v5LN6hPPjt59y7czIepV_qjprQ_wyQGKQglWnEs9igiTC-lTodlpuLrypTbm6v9vNoUWIdCECCdUg9Xwwy0OQfqXHo0z04fh1JBs71jplUUxij8Xd_AmTE4gI0qkYe8J70uC8EMAhlFGClLqM1sN" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="500" data-original-width="1200" height="133" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEj254KQUBD4nFTFqK3c9uoIjNMFwVHabjkNruGwBKx6v5LN6hPPjt59y7czIepV_qjprQ_wyQGKQglWnEs9igiTC-lTodlpuLrypTbm6v9vNoUWIdCECCdUg9Xwwy0OQfqXHo0z04fh1JBs71jplUUxij8Xd_AmTE4gI0qkYe8J70uC8EMAhlFGClLqM1sN" width="320" /></a></div><b>Monarch: Legacy of Monsters</b> should maybe have been called <b>Legacy of Wankers</b> because apart from the monsters this really was a load of dreadful bollocks. We did, however, get some more Godzilla, who really mega-charged this pile of wank whenever he (or she) appeared and there was a cameo from Kong at the very end. There was a big fight with a dragon type creature and the revelation that in this 'underworld' one day is the equivalent of maybe one or two years on Earth, which, like I hinted at last time, doesn't seem to have reached the film makers of the Legendary Monsterverse just yet. This 'conclusion' - God, I hope there isn't another series - was about everyone pulling together - a sort of existential bukkake session - to get Cate, Mae, Keiko and Lee back from the other world and get someone else involved in the Monsterverse other than Monarch. Godzilla was good; Kong was fun to see, everything else, even the schmaltzy reunion just made me want to crawl into a corner and be quietly sick into a bag. this has been a really disappointing load of wank.<p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Italians 6 Indians 3 - Why?</span></i></b></p><p>We concluded the <b>James May: Our Man in Italy</b> series so we could move onto his latest travelogue. This wasn't as good as the Japanese road trip, but that might be down to the fact that May seemed no real stranger to Italy; he spoke the language better than you might imagine and he knew his pastas from his Ponte Vecchios. </p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiIyWu6ZbqkXkk4KPO85GShbSQs5XXyY3dRJ7j7TnRR9yUFJ34j2lxoWhZeOun3lQAi5QOxjMdU3YNXk2iZxLzFLsiPAIt3WLOkUnCEeEsIqdGoUoP6GXHhixMXJskU4ij6xLwRQVT2UVMc0b-50shn-fdfJx9b-mv4nPGhz2-971O4Nr6aXL243ZFwHEke" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="654" data-original-width="980" height="214" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiIyWu6ZbqkXkk4KPO85GShbSQs5XXyY3dRJ7j7TnRR9yUFJ34j2lxoWhZeOun3lQAi5QOxjMdU3YNXk2iZxLzFLsiPAIt3WLOkUnCEeEsIqdGoUoP6GXHhixMXJskU4ij6xLwRQVT2UVMc0b-50shn-fdfJx9b-mv4nPGhz2-971O4Nr6aXL243ZFwHEke" width="320" /></a></div>There was also the fact that Italy has just about been done to death over the last ten years or; if it hasn't been toured by chefs and art historians, it's been done by famous NY actors and bog standard TV pundits - Italy appears to be the go to place if you want to do a vibrant travelogue that's got a ready made audience. That said, James May is far better at this kind of thing than his detractors suggest he is and his constant banter with his film crew is far more entertaining than it should be. There was also quite a few things we learned about the place that other programmes have never touched on; such as the need for permits to film just about anything and the fact it costs an arm and a leg to film inside anything in Italy that is deemed a landmark or famous; for a show financed by Amazon it was quite telling the producers weren't going to pay the extortionate prices demanded to film inside the Coliseum or the Parthenon. There was also the fantastic place called Barga, which is essentially the Scottish capital of Italy. This archetypal Tuscany town is jampacked full of people with dual Scottish and Italian heritage and you're just as likely to find bagpipes, haggis and Tenants lager as you are pizza, pasta and Michelangelo - it's been added to my bucket list.<p></p><p>Next up is <b>James May: Our Man in India</b> which starts well with half an episode in Mumbai with James being roasted at a comedy club by local comedians and wandering around the slums discovering a peaceful and productive world despite the health and safety nightmares and filth. He's then off to somewhere I've never heard of for the Festival of Holi, which is a real highlight - something I would have loved to experience first hand. James seems to have a cracking time, even if he can't get rid of the paint and coloured powder he was covered in during a riotous amount of singing and dancing. </p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEj60_edVDfyKpdPrfi_IgN9_O_pMMFx8VsXeygvwPQXoEDIz8g7UcNNeQwVdwVXYBaR2eiXRsx90yrlHZ5O-F-JIw0OR16O5zI7lpBwC0tgJR54psnSYx8tHLjemfFRWQY5tAXbY_O7vazRC1KRvnYXZ_ZeN25LPJCOOvkzE5ZaRpHssKhx5A1kHcvekRs7" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="828" data-original-width="1242" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEj60_edVDfyKpdPrfi_IgN9_O_pMMFx8VsXeygvwPQXoEDIz8g7UcNNeQwVdwVXYBaR2eiXRsx90yrlHZ5O-F-JIw0OR16O5zI7lpBwC0tgJR54psnSYx8tHLjemfFRWQY5tAXbY_O7vazRC1KRvnYXZ_ZeN25LPJCOOvkzE5ZaRpHssKhx5A1kHcvekRs7" width="320" /></a></div>I expect most of this puzzlingly 3-part series, which is May travelling across India from Mumbai to Kolkata rather than attempting to do the entire subcontinent, will be very enlightening - again, this is well trodden route for travelogues and Holi and Mumbai are both things that have been spotlighted elsewhere, but I expect there's going to be stuff that you simply would have expected, especially in India, such as meeting a man who hand paints Bollywood film posters - and bloody good he is - or entrepreneurs making a fortune out of ridding the Mumbai streets of waste plastic and turning it into recycled useful things. You also get the impression that over the last four years of making this show May has become quite good friends with director and executive producer Tom Whitter, who creeps onto the screen more often than just about everyone else apart from the host.<p></p><p>It so far has been the most entertaining of series, with the second episode being funny, poignant and very much full of surprises, especially Aggra and Varanasi - which, while covered before by others, was moving and makes you want to experience it - the incidental music was also really excellent. This is the best of May's travelogues so far and well worth watching, it's just a shame it's been so brief.</p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Hello, </span><span style="font-size: large;">hello, </span><span style="font-size: medium;">hello, </span><span style="font-size: x-small;">hello...</span></i></b></p><p>The weird thing about <b>Echo</b>, the new Marvel series is it doesn't feel like a Marvel series despite having the Kingpin, Hawkeye and Daredevil appearing in it. The thing is I'm not strictly sure what it falls under as it's so short and doesn't hang around with it's slight story.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjV2grow4TtkO1w1Uo2ZP-KlesNuL_sGw-qXQza4FV0Bpe7am4szi08P57mlt5yX2JKivoTGdWtLwHxGDoz2e15Gs2kP3B5bSo00IdT83TUzBjIcB8BlqYSHxyzSSWsAxY5XzsMIdx68VW8fvv6khLXvvIA_LS3zuKgtWYB5M0QZFehpzY-3ReTUEdniEUJ" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="288" data-original-width="474" height="194" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjV2grow4TtkO1w1Uo2ZP-KlesNuL_sGw-qXQza4FV0Bpe7am4szi08P57mlt5yX2JKivoTGdWtLwHxGDoz2e15Gs2kP3B5bSo00IdT83TUzBjIcB8BlqYSHxyzSSWsAxY5XzsMIdx68VW8fvv6khLXvvIA_LS3zuKgtWYB5M0QZFehpzY-3ReTUEdniEUJ" width="320" /></a></div>Actually, there's a few weird things about it, such as Alaqua Cox's almost perfect inability to smile. It took us 68 minutes of show time before Maya cracked her first smile and I'm not sure it was a smile or if she simply let a very silent but satisfying fart out. I think it's extremely brave of anyone to do a series about a deaf Native American superhero with one leg who is possibly one of the most miserable people on the planet. She might not have much to smile about but you'd think she'd lighten up just a little bit, especially as she's back among the people who all seem to love her, but she's too wrapped up in her revenge bollocks to even notice. <p></p><p>The opening twenty minutes of the first episode is basically a padded out refresher course in who Echo is and why she's the way she is; but we have added Native North American mythology bollocks thrown in to suggest she's really channelling some deity and is blessed with superpowers because of it. We also discover that Wilson Fisk didn't die at Maya's hands, she managed not to kill him with a bullet to the head from three feet and his men are gunning for the disabled hero with rage issues, or are they? There's some good fight scenes, more blood and oblique nudity than you'd imagine in a Marvel series and it has Chaske Spencer in it and we all know how good he is. Yet, there's this uncanny feeling that the recent Netflix action comedy <b>The Family Plan</b> used the same plot and arguably better...</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjG68ceVG9VgbtjwuUvw8vCuymDYtFQzylkp1ZcBcVvtkHvDOxoyqlUiOIo7CXEkJ4AsHozpRvdflJLFRbBnrStn4tkhNQeVWaBfqF9Xaec9SPS7OOoFVAqfL8CsXoePBNFeMz5O0YgOb3VNXjqe9hZ1hMLpeab08uoYvrnLC2g5ha9dsSfriMLo--GJ1OH" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="266" data-original-width="474" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjG68ceVG9VgbtjwuUvw8vCuymDYtFQzylkp1ZcBcVvtkHvDOxoyqlUiOIo7CXEkJ4AsHozpRvdflJLFRbBnrStn4tkhNQeVWaBfqF9Xaec9SPS7OOoFVAqfL8CsXoePBNFeMz5O0YgOb3VNXjqe9hZ1hMLpeab08uoYvrnLC2g5ha9dsSfriMLo--GJ1OH" width="320" /></a></div>However, after two very promising episodes, things start getting a bit underwhelming. The Kingpin makes a reappearance; there's lots of 'comedy' henchmen and we get a lot of Choctaw mumbo jumbo about deities and [ahem] echoes of the past. It gets very symbolic and adds yet another layer of 'gods' to an already weary MCU tapestry of confusing gods. This felt like a two and a half hour film split into sections and not a very good film at that and it actually peters out rather than builds to a thrilling climax; in fact the denouement is really poor and short - weighing in at about 30 minutes after you take out recaps, titles and end credits. The 'battle' between Echo and Fisk was pants, with Maya using her newfound powers to... do what exactly? She seemed to make Fisk a better person? Nah. It was just really lame and wasn't at all clear - perhaps you need to know the comic, which if that's the case, it's a huge cop out. <p></p>There is a post credit scene that sets Fisk up to be the next mayor of New York, echoing [ahem] events that happened in Daredevil's comic, so that's your <b>Born Again</b> reference/plot and Maya reunited with her family. I'd just like to point out that the Guardian newspaper claimed this was a great, if very bloody, TV show and yet again it seems they based their review on possibly the trailers or maybe the comic because it wasn't great and the review wasn't accurate, yet again. This was poor and I can totally see why it was released in one go, was reduced in episodes and why we won't see a second season. Yet another nail in the MCU's coffin.<div><p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Beefy</span></i></b></p><p>Much has been said about the Netflix series <b>Beef</b> so we decided to watch it. This comedy about two Asian Americans who are raging about their lives has garnered much praise, yet after one episode we both felt a bit meh about it. I'm not sure if it's us, but we kind of want new TV shows to grab us and drag us in; there's not enough time or inclination to watch four or five episodes in the hope we might start liking it.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgBYR4YKLsIdI8ovqmkd4Erw-o-nKryYHmI9_Ms9dzC7nfa8wbfkiAFdyRJEGg1hTeMOr92LIMHRKYkx4vwUfs8MO1CzvMtFCsjWReYmxlbxduCfCQZNFtQSYH5aglpDGSht9tLt_wuqs4dJKhY6qyj5jaP2FIDrbaQLvmFLqthcVNocUDEb0UmfgaoHcd2" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="248" data-original-width="474" height="167" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgBYR4YKLsIdI8ovqmkd4Erw-o-nKryYHmI9_Ms9dzC7nfa8wbfkiAFdyRJEGg1hTeMOr92LIMHRKYkx4vwUfs8MO1CzvMtFCsjWReYmxlbxduCfCQZNFtQSYH5aglpDGSht9tLt_wuqs4dJKhY6qyj5jaP2FIDrbaQLvmFLqthcVNocUDEb0UmfgaoHcd2" width="320" /></a></div>Starring Steven Yuen and Ali Wong as two people on either side of a road rage incident that spirals into a tale of revenge and survival, this probably should be great TV - eight half hour episodes of pithy dramedy - but it wasn't funny and neither of us had any sympathy for any of the seemingly entitled characters. We might be wrong; this might be brilliant TV but it pushed no buttons for either of us.<p></p><p>I've been told that we should watch <b>Succession</b>, which like <b>Beef</b> has won a multitude of awards recently, but I get the impression there seems to be a spate of 'watching rich or entitled people suffer' programmes on at the moment and frankly if something doesn't grab me I'm very unlikely to watch it and I know the wife is even harder to please than me. I don't want to watch rich people having constructed first world problems, mainly because I don't really want to watch things about bloody rich people at all. They're pretty much the bane of society at the best of times and like people who get pleasure from having sex with animals or children they should be kept away from our screens so not to encourage them or anger us...<br /></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Next Time...</span></i></b></p><p>I'm slightly lost... We don't appear to have anything new on the horizon. Something might pop up on the schedules or get released that I forgot about, but terrestrial TV is all about shite like <b>The Traitors</b> or the 'new' <b>Gladiators</b> style over substance wank. We don't do shows like this, they're as appealing as taking a bath in someone's sick and I don't care how much critics or people we know say, 'BUT YOU HAVE TO WATCH THIS!!!' because critics are usually wrong or have a vested interest and history suggests my friends have questionable taste in TV.</p><p>On the Flash Drive of Doom we still have three seasons of <b>Legion</b> and last year's Sci-Fi series <b>Silo</b>. There's <b>Mr Bates Versus the Post Office</b> if we want to watch something everyone else seems to have watched and we still have three seasons of <b>Fargo</b>. I'd like to watch a 1985 series called <b>Mr Pye</b> that I remember with fondness and spent decades trying to track down, ended up finding a DVD and about two weeks later it became available on All4...</p><p>I'm sure something will turn up, it always does and the wife has lots of stuff bookmarked on iPlayer that I might not be able to avoid; but if this doesn't appear next week you'll know why...</p><p><br /></p></div>Phil Hallhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12680058800847509275noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5979663737404474935.post-22887901514860229912024-01-08T10:00:00.003+00:002024-01-08T13:05:50.908+00:00Film Culture - Cowboy Dreams and Futuristic Nightmares<p><i>New Year new look! I decided that I needed to split film and TV blogs up this year. I watch more TV than film, so an irregular movie column is quite easier to achieve. So while my TV ramblings will continue in the regular blog spot, this film one will probably be on an as and when schedule, especially if there's not a lot of new films to be reviewed and most of the reviews will be older films from the now legendary Flash Drive of Doom...</i></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Legal Alien?</span></i></b></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEimF3SwrPz3oLG70QqGHwSyd65JuXl0nvxTmhidmfnbMB-KmsqVFr5P1qz0Zr7GNyaZzr2jG-DpIqYtoQRPDsulG2EpuW0bcwvAbdaOhxGlvGRfEkRTe_DZ1et0IiXd6fFHWDPrAinfPE7oQBvXbdbUcNp5eW8qqYBIcqz-v41UTN3xZ14SrFFX6iWDXiad" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="1100" data-original-width="1600" height="220" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEimF3SwrPz3oLG70QqGHwSyd65JuXl0nvxTmhidmfnbMB-KmsqVFr5P1qz0Zr7GNyaZzr2jG-DpIqYtoQRPDsulG2EpuW0bcwvAbdaOhxGlvGRfEkRTe_DZ1et0IiXd6fFHWDPrAinfPE7oQBvXbdbUcNp5eW8qqYBIcqz-v41UTN3xZ14SrFFX6iWDXiad" width="320" /></a></div>The wife was quite clear about this - the book is even better than the film and I think the film is a solid gold masterpiece and I can say that again now that Kevin Spacey has been exonerated from all the damaging accusations that almost destroyed his brilliant career.<p></p><p><b>K-PAX</b> is one of those films that is simply superb and I can't believe it's been so long since I last watched it because it really is one of the best films I've ever seen. It makes me smile, it makes my eyes leak and I think the reason the wife thinks I should read the book is because it's even more ambiguous than the film, which does try to offer a logical explanation to at least part of the story. Kevin Spacey plays Prot, allegedly from the planet K-PAX, who is 'arrested' in Grand Central Station for helping a woman who was mugged but says the wrong things to the police who don't care he was just helping, they stick him in cuffs and ship him off to the looney bin, where he eventually ends up being treated by Jeff Bridge's psychiatrist Dr Mark Powell. From that point on it's about how Prot interacts with the mentally ill patients, how he astounds astrophysicists and leaves Bridges feeling there's more to the man in front of him that meets the eye, that is until he hypnotises him and starts to dig into who Prot might really be. </p><p>I think everyone who watches this movie and enjoys it for what it is will always believe that the ending was put there because the film was a serious look at mental health and you couldn't really have an alien in a Manhattan mental health hospital, either that or the director wasn't going to make a sci-fi film, but the patients knew it and I think anyone who loves this kind of film knows it as well, even if the sly smile at the end suggests something else entirely. There's more to this than meets the eye and it will always be one of my favourite films of all time. Now, I must read the book(s). <br /></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">With Hindsight</span></i></b></p><p>An occasional entry on either blog that examines something already talked about...</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiR984kJYunvKV0AxULdgRq5_tj_bFCvi24gNfXVbqWMX02-TpgH6qN_P0pmuSKUd3MdRvKs2OeAJQGrKv4koQyI6Uhd3xuiR_xJ3AH_kEkD4JwwMq6AXh01bGeDDCpLUy6lLBQu7bcSpwumWr6vYWOFDvSUmjfZJ5Ty3YSasqxDGJBQRz8J-F9S0Slyspm" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="699" data-original-width="474" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiR984kJYunvKV0AxULdgRq5_tj_bFCvi24gNfXVbqWMX02-TpgH6qN_P0pmuSKUd3MdRvKs2OeAJQGrKv4koQyI6Uhd3xuiR_xJ3AH_kEkD4JwwMq6AXh01bGeDDCpLUy6lLBQu7bcSpwumWr6vYWOFDvSUmjfZJ5Ty3YSasqxDGJBQRz8J-F9S0Slyspm" width="163" /></a></div><i>The Guardian</i> newspaper [which has become something of a target in my house for being a gaslighting centre right middle class rag] spent an entire <i>The Week in Geek</i> column after New Year raging about how 'successful' the Netflix/Zack Snyder <b>Rebel Moon, Part One: A Child of Fire</b> has been and essentially slagging off people who dared to claim they liked it. This newspaper has form with reviews, such as when Lucy Mangan reviewed <b>Clarkson's Farm</b> without seeing it and claimed it was so bad it should be cancelled before anyone got to see it. When it became clear she hadn't actually watched the series, the paper got Stuart Heritage to review it again - positively - given the backlash the newspaper received.<p></p><p>Then just four months or so ago, the paper reviewed the brilliant <b>Lessons in Chemistry</b> and made allegations about the series that were clearly based on the reviewer not having watched the show and taking the review from a synopsis of the book it was based on. Subsequently the eight-episode Apple TV+ show made the paper's Top 50 of the year (although not as high as it deserved). Then about four weeks before Christmas it reviewed <b>There's Something in the Barn</b>, gave it three stars and declared it "a fun festive film in the vein of Gremlins," when it actually was one of the worst films released in the 21st century. </p><p>But anyhow, back to the Zack Snyder film which garnered enough agreement with the Guardian's opinion to allow the comments section to run riot with defamation and nastiness, allowing trolls who would usually have been banned by the paper to attack anyone who dared suggest it was a lot of fun and shouldn't be taken so seriously. I can't emphasise enough how people should a) not take any Guardian review seriously and b) if they still read the Guardian they should stop and either find a different paper to read or a different web site to get their biased news from. The latter should be a resolution for everybody - coupled with helping kill off this worthless newspaper and consign it to the same history as the News of the World (which at least was honest about how shit it was). Yet to dedicate an entire column to slagging off people who liked something its reviewer despised is really a low bar for a newspaper that, at times, does good investigative journalism. It makes you wonder if the newspaper's editorial staff are all about 15.</p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Old Western's Never Die</span></i></b></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEi2DfK4tkSGurxbrw9XvzmlC_JFDvHAruYFDUGTY-sZ4Ez7S53xmxFNim8B1Xj-ShR7CJnu1moVhTgw28fAZqve5rWX0OlZ0qQ6mKwmphFYdivwfCJH9-wk_xZG-Lk2A6uLLNMLDU5ck1WL3x8cy7wLk68QVAgLZGcwgolZzpS4HswGt-JxvsNyzLqfbci1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="1920" data-original-width="1280" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEi2DfK4tkSGurxbrw9XvzmlC_JFDvHAruYFDUGTY-sZ4Ez7S53xmxFNim8B1Xj-ShR7CJnu1moVhTgw28fAZqve5rWX0OlZ0qQ6mKwmphFYdivwfCJH9-wk_xZG-Lk2A6uLLNMLDU5ck1WL3x8cy7wLk68QVAgLZGcwgolZzpS4HswGt-JxvsNyzLqfbci1" width="160" /></a></div>38 years after it came out and 37 years since we watched the VHS video release, we decided to give <b>Silverado</b> another spin. I remembered enjoying it, especially as it was unusual for a western to be made in the 1980s - an era for flash comedies, crass cop movies, big hair and seminal sci-fi. It was a western that tried to be cutting edge and a bit more modern and it was over two hours long, however while it was enjoyable in a 'you don't see things like this much anymore' kind of way and it had a bunch of famous actors in it who either disappeared from view or went onto become huge stars, it was also just a western. It also had John Cleese as a sort of bad ass sheriff and seemed to spend an awful lot of time getting to where it wanted to be and then not a lot of time when it got there. It was interesting to see a film with the likes of Scott Glen, Kevin Kline, Kevin Costner, Jeff Goldblum, Brian Dennehy, Danny Glover, Patricia Arquette (why she was in this is anybody's guess) and Linda Smith in it, but I seem to recall the man who made it, Lawrence Kasdan, saw it as a reboot of the classic western and as we've all probably noticed, that still hasn't happened. It offered much but kind of dribbled a climax. <p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Nightmare Scenario</span></i></b></p><p>I finally bit the bullet and watched the latest Nicholas Cage film, despite my better judgement and the knowledge that I have been misled in the past by people telling me, 'No, this Nick Cage film is really good, he's stopped making shit films...' only to discover he hadn't and it wasn't. However, <b>Dream Scenario</b> is actually one of the best, if not <i>the</i> best Nick Cage film I have ever seen. It is quite superb, very tragic and ultimately one of the saddest things I have seen in a long time.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhZlunVY6rYvfnyXDb4OCfDtA7dmnWmu3KH_9fWVCMZ0uueL5G1fQjXAGioZU12DBwDxOm08J8iNaUhkubd6TqultUOwBf3Hzw-d4MpbjTA7MpvEHPGhehQeWVBKjfxix0tBby-wRalRAwNpj_YfVQxNFZPCzJj1aoSUA4Kw5x9XsDKjfGNX3JGOJgdlOEA" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="180" data-original-width="320" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhZlunVY6rYvfnyXDb4OCfDtA7dmnWmu3KH_9fWVCMZ0uueL5G1fQjXAGioZU12DBwDxOm08J8iNaUhkubd6TqultUOwBf3Hzw-d4MpbjTA7MpvEHPGhehQeWVBKjfxix0tBby-wRalRAwNpj_YfVQxNFZPCzJj1aoSUA4Kw5x9XsDKjfGNX3JGOJgdlOEA" width="320" /></a></div>Paul Matthews is a mild-mannered, slightly boring college professor specialising in biology who, without explanation, starts popping up in peoples dreams, which ultimately turns him into an overnight sensation and one of the most interesting people on the planet. Everyone knows him and as a result he starts to attract attention he and his family don't want. He turns up in almost everyone's dreams but does very little apart from just being in them, almost like an innocent bystander. Then after a series of rather strange things, the dreams turn nasty and Paul becomes a kind of modern day Freddy Kreuger as he wanders through peoples dreams slashing and killing people indiscriminately and this has almost the opposite effect with people no longer wanting to know him and he starts to attract problems and bad luck. It's from this point in the story that you start to feel desperately unhappy and profound sadness for him because it doesn't matter what he does things just get worse for him and he can't even plead for pity without people thinking he's just making things worse. Cage is quite brilliant as a man driven to the brink of his own sanity by the events unfolding around him and unable to fathom how his life is systematically being destroyed by something that really has nothing to do with him. There is more to it than that but to delve too deeply would spoil what is essentially a very good film, albeit one that you can't help but feel great sadness about.<br /><p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">It's Still Not A Tumour!</span></i></b></p><p>I found myself watching Film4 and possibly the most unlikely film comedy of 1990 was being shown. <b>Kindergarten Cop </b>shouldn't be a classic movie, but somehow it manages to be, despite its best efforts. Arnie had discovered comedies by this point in his career and this seemed like the perfect vehicle to prove he could make people laugh. I don't know if it was rest of the cast that facilitated this or if he genuinely did come across as a funny guy.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEix1iAfXhkBPGFWyUSalXH6oYttNCgto1vgwYGWaBFKEsBMAFotezbFFyS8MT5qpO3dGEWvvqjdqj3fvvE-WGkPSHeME0JByRBowEV3Et0tsQ-Blo3h13li4h6bZL8M_f7vPVNWVaxFe-jQ_PVG9qZaV7ZOkRFAzN5y2kUSKkhHJxDo7QGEoHXPKcJ545E1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="564" data-original-width="859" height="210" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEix1iAfXhkBPGFWyUSalXH6oYttNCgto1vgwYGWaBFKEsBMAFotezbFFyS8MT5qpO3dGEWvvqjdqj3fvvE-WGkPSHeME0JByRBowEV3Et0tsQ-Blo3h13li4h6bZL8M_f7vPVNWVaxFe-jQ_PVG9qZaV7ZOkRFAzN5y2kUSKkhHJxDo7QGEoHXPKcJ545E1" width="320" /></a></div>He plays John Kimble, a cop trying to get a bad man put away for bad things and through some contrived reasoning, Kimble and his partner have to go to some obscure west coast community, where he has to pose as a kindergarten teacher when his partner gets a severe case of the shits; from this point on it's just a number of set pieces with under six year olds, interspersed with lots of footage that could have been used in that old TV show <i>Kids Say the Funniest Things</i>. The thing is the longer I watched it, the more I found myself ignoring the (remember this was filmed in 1989 but not released until 1990) bad hairstyles, questionable acting, lame action sequences and double entendres and just enjoying it for a bit of nostalgia. And Arnie looked so young (and Linda Hunt so old considering she was just 44) and no one knew he was going to be a Republican at this point, even if he was originally from Austria, like someone else from history...<p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">In Elysium Fields</span></i></b></p><p>We finally got around to watching Neill Blomkamp's <b>Elysium</b> and one wonders why this director fell from grace so quickly after this and <b>District 9</b> as his most recent films would have gone 'straight to video' in bygone times.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgRNimRBVu9kF8CBnTmqmHw6NWUOGCqEEGkebBHwAmKT3_I31fSaurPtIiegxdRiWwk72AvH-_VLYEPMaIsMKQ5EKUdPXjmg5rcUnX_9IjR6BlIe7fNoKWhlvivThVK7Z1FSqoUvF3yT_FaE7-oSuMV4e0xmjJ4uN2nEwEUlVut-lrIIEK7G2DClkCMUoI_" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="1362" data-original-width="2048" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgRNimRBVu9kF8CBnTmqmHw6NWUOGCqEEGkebBHwAmKT3_I31fSaurPtIiegxdRiWwk72AvH-_VLYEPMaIsMKQ5EKUdPXjmg5rcUnX_9IjR6BlIe7fNoKWhlvivThVK7Z1FSqoUvF3yT_FaE7-oSuMV4e0xmjJ4uN2nEwEUlVut-lrIIEK7G2DClkCMUoI_" width="320" /></a></div><b>Elysium</b> wasn't really the film I expected it to be from the promo posters and trailers I'd seen, over ten years ago now. I can also see why it flopped at the box office, despite being a taught sci-fi film with relatable heroes and a couple of proper piece of shit villains - namely Jodie Foster and Sharlto Copley, whose Kruger really was as mad as a box of rabid bats and seemingly kept coming back for more. He was the main antagonist opposing Matt Damon's Max, who just wants a normal life but gets butt-fucked by 2154 too often. The film is essentially about overthrowing the elite, who live on a space station, while Earth chokes to death in pollution and violence - policed by robots with zero tolerance - and where illness, injury and disease can be cured but the people in charge are happy to let the people [read: cattle] die as long as profits are maintained. It could be allegorical for the 2020s but with a little more compassion. <p></p><p>The wife found it a bit too slow and struggled to stay awake in the opening scenes, but I thought it was considerably better than I expected - but, that said, you don't often see Matt Damon in anything that isn't at least half good. There's good support from Alice Braga, Diego Luna and William Fichtner, the sets were realistic and in many ways it fits in perfectly with Blomkamp's alien film - <b>District 9</b> - with it's feeling of hopelessness and dystopia, however I'm still struggling to understand why Foster, who by this point was making fewer and fewer movies, would want to be in it. It's still worth a view if you get the chance. </p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Next time...</span></i></b></p><p>This is a redundant component because I could list all the films on the Flash Drive of Doom, but there's no guarantee we'll watch them. The wife fancies having a Harry Potter marathon at some point; I still haven't watched <b>Spider-Man: Across the Spiderverse</b> and we're looking for a window of opportunity to view <b>Killers of the Flower Moon</b> which at 3Β½ hours needs to be a good film or I'll feel cheated. We have stuff I want to watch but she doesn't and vice versa and that's before we even get onto what's stored on the Freeview set top box we've 'taped' from TV. Whatever we watch, you can guarantee I'll have an opinion about it...</p><p><br /></p><p><br /></p><p><br /></p><p><br /></p><p><br /></p><p><br /></p><p> </p>Phil Hallhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12680058800847509275noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5979663737404474935.post-33373730036642712382024-01-06T11:37:00.003+00:002024-01-06T11:37:49.623+00:00TV Culture - Whatever You Want<p><i>New Year new look! I decided that I needed to split TV and films up this year. I watch more TV than film, so a weekly (or thereabouts) TV column is quite easy to achieve, but 'padding' it out with whatever movies we've watched almost seems a bit misplaced. So while my TV ramblings will continue in the regular blog spot, the film one will probably be on an as and when schedule, especially if there's not a lot of new films to be reviewed. It will also give me the chance to dig deeper into specific TV series rather than just a general review...</i></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Rock the Ballet</span></i></b></p><p>The fact that Martin and Gary Kemp will allow themselves to be parodied - yet again - by the extremely talented Rhys Thomas says a lot about the two brothers. <b>The Kemps: All Gold</b> is the follow-up to the 2020 mockumentary <b>The Kemps: All True</b> where the two brothers and founder members of the 80s New Romantic/pop band Spandau Ballet sent themselves up and now three years later they're back to do it all again. </p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiz7wz8ZexRNDIujJjpjFXqsQp342U9MR0q412Ogjo6EysQkuPiMDmNZaxovip1TCqGlDiZwed4uhOHKs9Rw11yFZoZ0koZKefgkcNAdxtHKppzS7cm7FcYYqsaMnNQCiRou35yoKXoL5JI3JPWylJz0zeOrGJBiLwULhRGvDrAmdy18ay4-9vFywCZ2_YH" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="270" data-original-width="474" height="182" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiz7wz8ZexRNDIujJjpjFXqsQp342U9MR0q412Ogjo6EysQkuPiMDmNZaxovip1TCqGlDiZwed4uhOHKs9Rw11yFZoZ0koZKefgkcNAdxtHKppzS7cm7FcYYqsaMnNQCiRou35yoKXoL5JI3JPWylJz0zeOrGJBiLwULhRGvDrAmdy18ay4-9vFywCZ2_YH" width="320" /></a></div>This time it's all about making some money for Martin and returning to a life of being respected for Gary, but naturally this is never going to be the case. Martin is separated from his wives - Pepsi & Shirley and their 12 children - while Gary lives in a sprawling mansion in Norfolk that might be haunted. Along for the ride is their long lost brother Ross (not that one) and their manager, the brilliant Michael Kitchen playing John Farrow, who you might remember is also the manager of Thotch - another of Rhys Thomas's spoof subjects. He suggests to the boys that they make a biopic - with Adil Ray as Tony Hadley - which completely rewrites their history and bombs at the box office. They then team up with the last surviving member of Status Quo - Francis Rossi - to form Spandau Quo to perform at midnight on NYE for the BBC.<p></p><p>It's very funny for the first half, but struggles to sustain the laughs when Christopher Ecclestone - as their former producer - suggests they break into a warehouse to steal their own original recordings, which they allegedly sold. From this point on it descends into farce rather than surreal lunacy; it's like once the slightly bonkers set up is exhausted there is no real money shot and it struggles for a proper climax. I seem to recall the original mockumentary had a similar problem and this would have worked if it had just been a diary of one thing after another going wrong, without having to have set pieces that struggled to improve it. It still garnered lots of LOLs in the opening 30 minutes which more than made up for the lack of them in the later half. Perhaps it would be advisable not to have a third part for this.</p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Analysis of Evil</span></i></b></p><p>Now we're up to date with <b>Evil</b>, I thought it might be good to share some ideas with you, especially if you've been watching it. I touched on this last time out that perhaps the reason nothing seems to conclude is because they might all be in purgatory, but there was a sublime nod of the head towards this theory in the season finale of series three as there was a conclusion to one of the plot lines and something happened that will surely have repercussions when season four hits the screens later in 2024, because if it doesn't then the fans are going to think they're involved in some kind of a con.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiZc7R1_UT5YJ3x2x9UriVYAWwcpZqOtwzGNjSdJOZq8m-NQ97y8zG50Znb3cEwA1fBShfFCbfdCMcLoSIdw0QgO1sg6akdERkA72pjhAGMYNlNXez6fUxL8b3XM2PpF06RWyDfUp-AikPfJPpQ8MnneOTnDD9fK727lVwr1PKw2_GA8DVnDBQLUosU1fOI" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="338" data-original-width="600" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiZc7R1_UT5YJ3x2x9UriVYAWwcpZqOtwzGNjSdJOZq8m-NQ97y8zG50Znb3cEwA1fBShfFCbfdCMcLoSIdw0QgO1sg6akdERkA72pjhAGMYNlNXez6fUxL8b3XM2PpF06RWyDfUp-AikPfJPpQ8MnneOTnDD9fK727lVwr1PKw2_GA8DVnDBQLUosU1fOI" width="320" /></a></div>Obviously, most regular viewers of this will have seen the return of Andy after his four daughters blew Leland's scheme wide open using a poke facility on a video game and will also have wondered how Sheryl will manage to avoid the coming split with her own daughter now Kristen knows that her mother is working for DF and is still associated to Leland; who is also the father of a surrogate child using the egg that Kristen has had stolen. The questions this throws up only further make me think that <b>Evil</b> either takes place in a purgatory or at some point the writers and show runners are going to have to admit that Leland Townsend, Kristen's mother and their associates need to be exposed in some way for doing the illegal things that never seem to come back and haunt them.<p></p>It is possible that because these modern day demons have influence all over the world they can avoid any form of real scrutiny, but surely their plan for one of the Bouchard children is going to be smashed to pieces now that Kristen knows not to allow her own mother any access to any of her children. I mean, Kristen's been possessed once so they're not likely to go down that route again and short of killing her - unlikely - the evil doers are going to have to either get pretty public or there's got to be some seismic shift in the next series, otherwise the viewers patience is going to be sorely tested. Plus, how come the kids' exposing Leland - yet again - didn't have more made of it? The amount of stuff Townsend has been involved in during the three seasons so far is remarkable, yet, like the snake he is, he manages to slither out of it in almost all the cases.<div><div><p></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjlTli7uu2CTnFLNtoRm1AOkOb7zfLlW8YLKVJlvuuy20bhKYfgPuImIVovD9ISBya5CHzbd4vBpN4En_lMGEpuPLPpjcgXIMyvLIpVIraWwjn_hdoETMGF3x5sAc6X_thHzqFeZgZnrPieJeHljSuqqe2zrWlkbozZjcqypZgfgl9JRBoqY9UXZf1mbmzC" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="1067" data-original-width="1600" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjlTli7uu2CTnFLNtoRm1AOkOb7zfLlW8YLKVJlvuuy20bhKYfgPuImIVovD9ISBya5CHzbd4vBpN4En_lMGEpuPLPpjcgXIMyvLIpVIraWwjn_hdoETMGF3x5sAc6X_thHzqFeZgZnrPieJeHljSuqqe2zrWlkbozZjcqypZgfgl9JRBoqY9UXZf1mbmzC" width="320" /></a></div>One of this show's biggest problems is the tendency to avoid moving forward with plots, especially ones that seem to have reached a natural conclusion only to be conveniently ignored until the show runners can be arsed to return to it; such as a few of Ben's subplots and the fact that the Bouchard family and what has happened to them over the last three years never seems to be addressed the way it would be if this was taking place in an actual real world setting - yet this programme has made a big deal about seemingly taking a real life approach to a fantastically grisly premise. We've reached a point where none of Father David Acosta's subplots hold any real interest because we're invested in the Bouchards and to a lesser extent Ben's life, because both of these are far more interesting than the trials and tribulations of a newly ordained priest or the highly morally questionable Roman Catholic church. It might be a largely anti-Catholic series, but I think the least interesting aspect of it is now the reason it exists in the first place. There has been far too much obfuscation and lack of common sense displayed by the priests and Catholic church in this series for them to even be taken seriously; in fact while Leland and his demons are almost a comedy side line, the church runs them a close second. <p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Absolutely French</span></i></b></p><p>The BBC special <b>Dawn French is a Huge Twat</b> was an entertaining 75 minutes of comedy as one half of the funniest female double act on TV regaled us with stories of when she's been a massive twat. That was essentially the premise of this special - stories of Dawn French when she did things she was embarrassed about and as a concept it was quite funny; not riotously, but funny enough to illicit a few chuckles and LOL moments. The thing about French is that she comes across as the kind of person who <i>would </i>do something twattish but never in a deliberate way, probably because she does seem to be a very honest person, especially about her own shortcomings. This is, after all, a woman who has never shied away from her size or struggles with her weight. As a TV special at Christmas it was entertaining, but I can't help thinking I would have needed to have been a ... ahem... huge fan of hers to have paid money to see her doing this one-woman show live, because while it was fun it wasn't brilliant fun.</p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Um... Er... Nope...</span></i></b></p><p>Over in the film blog, I spend a little bit of time berating the Guardian newspaper for spending an entire column shitting and stamping in it because people dared to like a film it slagged off with a passion - you can read that later when I publish it. I also spend some time pointing out that The Guardian has an absolutely shitty track record at reviewing things and I believe firmly that the people the paper employs to review films and TV (and possibly music and books) are probably wankers with no taste or hacks who cobble together reviews based on a few things they've read from people they like or follow. There is also my theory that the paper has been trying to appeal to a demographic that doesn't read it; this might be a webpage only thing, in the anticipation that younger middle class people will look at the Guardian web pages rather than whatever young middle class kids actually look at, but in reality it comes across like a middle aged pervert trying to impress teenagers at a family wedding.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhj3juysmTBa1RD7AOfGaig56BRrixOUEVPrMgXIPVzMEtYz0mdY__r6bym-UmboL-H78gwImq4VeYQlqzxfDcSngFQe9Llab7gTZzO-LB1K44ReWUOrxGgKuRsreVWev5Xp-Q_un53PwmMk68_Fv8iG-Hal5C0sgzcBqZZ7FbSydXEtoCvugdhM6SD8CzW" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="1254" data-original-width="1880" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhj3juysmTBa1RD7AOfGaig56BRrixOUEVPrMgXIPVzMEtYz0mdY__r6bym-UmboL-H78gwImq4VeYQlqzxfDcSngFQe9Llab7gTZzO-LB1K44ReWUOrxGgKuRsreVWev5Xp-Q_un53PwmMk68_Fv8iG-Hal5C0sgzcBqZZ7FbSydXEtoCvugdhM6SD8CzW" width="320" /></a></div>One of the paper's 'TV Shows of the Year' was the BBC3 comedy <b>Such Brave Girls</b>, which it gave a four star review to and claimed was "properly brutal and properly funny". The reviewer was Lucy Mangan, who I mention in my film review piece as being the woman who reviewed a TV show based on her dislike of the main star and didn't bother watching it. Well all I can think is she wrote this review based on what someone said on TikTok because we sat through the entire first episode, where the characters mumbled, talked about suicide, mental health, sex and numerous other [tasteless] subjects and failed to say anything remotely funny. It was in my words, 'a stinky pile of unfunny bollocks' and it isn't big or clever to use emotive subjects for alleged humorous subjects. I'll just reiterate what I say in the film blog - don't watch anything The Guardian recommends and be curious about things it hates. <div><div><p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">More Non-Starters</span></i></b></p><p>2024 isn't getting off to the best of starts as far as TV is concerned. I revamp the TV blog and all I have to show for it is disappointment and disillusionment... So I noticed two new TV shows that debuted this week and thought, 'We'll give them a go.' ...</p><p>#1 - <b>Sanctuary (A Witch's Tale)</b> is a bit like <b>Doctors</b>, you know the afternoon BBC soap opera that's on after the news, at 1.45pm, most weekdays but is finishing soon. The reason I liken it to this is because it's badly acted, feels utterly scripted, is insincere and I'll be fucked if I watch any of it ever again. We managed 17 minutes and 33 seconds before I paused it and said to the wife that I didn't want to watch any more of it. It was awful, felt like something ITV would have done in the 1990s and I wasn't alone; the wife had the same feelings as me and was amazed I managed to get as far as I did without calling it to a halt... It's about a Cornish town called Sanctuary that is inhabited by witches and they all have brattish children and there's some mystery to solve and it was like watching an am-dram production of some play written by the local wannabe whose claim to fame was getting a blow job from an extra on Corrie while wearing a duck outfit - which sounds considerably more interesting...</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgNOgJ-jREIUil2gMVbSRdKjQaDFCgGlA02OuDgqKn1w_UAUbtZ-5tGXUH0hd2lQ9BeSKTkPn5jt8iovZ0cvUdAqspSdx7GRiPA6A7K7qSQSzJBud4wsyRxW4VoSBqC3a1vqyG1JdRJLKlFyeZC_04hy75gwLDfSozsuu5QMFMHEhjZXjA-1ltRBmwCI5Tr" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="267" data-original-width="474" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgNOgJ-jREIUil2gMVbSRdKjQaDFCgGlA02OuDgqKn1w_UAUbtZ-5tGXUH0hd2lQ9BeSKTkPn5jt8iovZ0cvUdAqspSdx7GRiPA6A7K7qSQSzJBud4wsyRxW4VoSBqC3a1vqyG1JdRJLKlFyeZC_04hy75gwLDfSozsuu5QMFMHEhjZXjA-1ltRBmwCI5Tr" width="320" /></a></div>#2 - <b>The Brothers Sun</b> was considerably better but failed to make us want to watch anything more than the opening episode. This eight-part Netflix series might be really good but I expect it will be eight episodes of people trying to kill the three main protagonists in various ways while the younger, inept, member of the trio learns how to defend himself with help from his older, wiser and deadlier brother. Essentially the leading Triad gang in Taiwan is being attacked by a mysterious assailant that leaves the top man in hospital and his son on a mission to protect his mother and brother, living in anonymity in LA. It has lots of martial arts in it, a lot of criminals, the usual slow motion fight scenes and not really enough comedy - for which it is supposed to be - to keep either of us amused or entertained. It might prove to be a great little series, but it failed to impress us, so we decided not to invest any more time on it.<p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Monster World Revisited</span></i></b></p><p>The most puzzling thing about this penultimate episode of <b>Monarch: Legacy of Monsters</b> was the fact that more things happened in it than in probably most of the previous eight episodes. Or at least it gave the impression of having more in it. We had the mystery of Leland Shaw's longevity solved and one of the longest lasting dangling subplots resolved, in what was likely to have been seen coming from several miles away on a foggy day...</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgxGAs1t5FuTjoyNJ4FuW-qCbOytUOA5j0c5JjzB_e2Z2Xa8PW9Rz6T9xp0mcpxpJTziVDhBDZ1sG_Z6tzYAMa_8uUuSQF9xEi5XMAj5eC-7CKhG0UPK5bYNx3Zm5-OpkbgtQkXao3fIOfF8dJ636zbq7DkoRjwUtCEHh7cVV9k-vZ_jOZcOjYnCBzaSgNT" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="266" data-original-width="474" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgxGAs1t5FuTjoyNJ4FuW-qCbOytUOA5j0c5JjzB_e2Z2Xa8PW9Rz6T9xp0mcpxpJTziVDhBDZ1sG_Z6tzYAMa_8uUuSQF9xEi5XMAj5eC-7CKhG0UPK5bYNx3Zm5-OpkbgtQkXao3fIOfF8dJ636zbq7DkoRjwUtCEHh7cVV9k-vZ_jOZcOjYnCBzaSgNT" width="320" /></a></div>The flashbacks kind of suggested we were going to see some kind of resolution as we time jumped back to 1962 and Bill Randa was now Hiroshi's adopted father and Leland was off on a mission that wouldn't see him return for 20 years, suggesting that if the situation with Cate, Mae and Leland isn't solved quickly then the same thing is going to happen all over again, but I'm erring towards that happening anyhow because I'm convinced this is a lead-in to the new <b>Godzilla x Kong: A New Empire</b> film which seems to be more focused on the Hollow Earth side of the titans universe than ever before. <p></p><p>This wasn't a bad episode and oddly enough there were a few monsters on show and an actual followable story/explanation of the up-in-the-air bollocks we've had to suffer for the last few weeks. One thing about the Hollow Earth that is a spoiler but I'm going to spill - time passes at a different rate there and that wasn't even touched upon in the recent <b>King Kong Vs Godzilla</b> film, so in many ways this TV series is either adding to that cannon or it's just doing its own thing.<br /></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Our Pillock in Italy</span></i></b></p><p>One of the treats of 2020 was the James May series set in Japan. The former <b>Top Gear</b> presenter is, by far, the most entertaining of that 'classic' trio and his <b>Our Man in Japan</b> was an excellent travelogue with added 'man out of his comfort zone'. We had no idea there was a <b>James May: Our Man in Italy</b> until the third season set in India dropped this week. I surprise myself at how stuff sneaks under my radar and it's probably one of the reasons I do this blog because it gives me an opportunity to look back on older blogs to jolt my memory about things I'd forgotten we'd watched...</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhiDh0Lr2_vBZ4Noun4zAgJGe1vSUbBOtGVD3L9-zmu4lEfLhSqkaSoY7qKqwLkRkZM01YsdbV8Fbv56gJ7Fg5cA2kJlMEa4dZDRJ-lksGHWT2fGnZbQJ9FAMr1FYMBJlJ_mGgon7dWSXPxaRA73GkmO_GZO-REzYl3OlAw1WN3OmUmrHYiiAjV3d9P0szr" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="337" data-original-width="590" height="183" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhiDh0Lr2_vBZ4Noun4zAgJGe1vSUbBOtGVD3L9-zmu4lEfLhSqkaSoY7qKqwLkRkZM01YsdbV8Fbv56gJ7Fg5cA2kJlMEa4dZDRJ-lksGHWT2fGnZbQJ9FAMr1FYMBJlJ_mGgon7dWSXPxaRA73GkmO_GZO-REzYl3OlAw1WN3OmUmrHYiiAjV3d9P0szr" width="320" /></a></div>The second series, as mentioned, set in Italy kicked off in Sicily and focused most of its attention on Palermo, Mount Etna and May getting forced into doing things that were well out of his comfort zone. I know when the Guardian reviewed it - Lucy bloody Mangan again - she disliked the fact he had banter with his film crew all the way through, but it works with May because he's not your average TV presenter/TV Chef/TV travel journalist; he treats it like you'd expect a man entering his 60s would, with a little irreverence and a lot of cynicism when he's forced away from doing the things he wants and has to do the things the producer wants. Yes, it's the gimmick for the series, but May pulls it off with a certain aplomb that others probably wouldn't attempt. Plus, we found his six-part Japanese sojourn great fun because he approached it like someone who had never been there before; we're both big fans of Italy - not least because of Stanley Tucci's fabulous <b>in Search of Italy</b> - and it's still on our bucket list to go to one day (which is why we're also looking forward to season three and India because... that as well...). An entertaining programme without being too earnest or up itself.<p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">General Ingorance</span></i></b></p><p><b>QIXL</b> continues to be an entertaining show even if, like I said before, it feels like it is coming to the end of it usefulness. The format is growing stale, the jokes tend to be versions of the same jokes made for the last 18 years and there's not really a lot you can do to reinvigorate it because it is a formulaic quiz show. The U series continues with an Upside Down theme that naturally only really touches on the actual upside down for a couple of questions before artistic licence allows it to wander off in strange vaguely related directions. Aisling Bee won this week not because she knew the most but because she said the least wrong things, plus there was a montage of her when she did win - on the screens behind - and two of them didn't feature in the 45 minute extended edition, suggesting to me that maybe watching this get made live might be more fun than watching the actual TV show.</p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Things Fall Apart</span></i></b></p><p>One thing you can say for sure about <b>For All Mankind</b> is there's never a happy ending guaranteed; there's usually some unexpected death or tumultuous event that has a catastrophic effect on subsequent happenings and this penultimate episode not only delivered that it also set us up for possibly the most tragic finale in the history of this superb series.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiiMYfP9r1W9i_msWG20KUBvY7GBLaX7GYzjJHigPbJ41bJQnqv5tp6poHAYSAwo70JBEBaZMJc5QV1k4abv8u-ecpQotjvPJ9L9U1nBiDsFd7LRIHXbFqXoL6-kavqpcx83M5-x-fneNSGtAFtIVSGjKWmW7z0WatXbAwiD8YRF6JPJWHQIXvJPvD4eho6" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="675" data-original-width="1200" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiiMYfP9r1W9i_msWG20KUBvY7GBLaX7GYzjJHigPbJ41bJQnqv5tp6poHAYSAwo70JBEBaZMJc5QV1k4abv8u-ecpQotjvPJ9L9U1nBiDsFd7LRIHXbFqXoL6-kavqpcx83M5-x-fneNSGtAFtIVSGjKWmW7z0WatXbAwiD8YRF6JPJWHQIXvJPvD4eho6" width="320" /></a></div>It's tough to say anything without ruining it for people who watch or people who might watch but it really does look like everything everyone has been working towards is in danger of falling apart. Ed and Dev's decidedly risky plan has been uncovered, except it's been interpreted as a potential terrorist act. Margo's warning from Sergei takes on a tragic turn of events and the reason for North Korea's involvement in this series at all is finally revealed. This episode feels like one of those TV series where in the penultimate episode everything turns to shit and it looks like all bets are not only off but also going to go south faster than a rocket launch, which usually means the good guys will out and everyone will live happily ever after... Except this is <b>For All Mankind</b> and there's no such thing as a happy ending in this star-spanning epic TV show. My gut says what is trying to be achieved will succeed but it's going to cost far more than we invested viewers want, but my head and heart is saying 'fuck that, this show doesn't do things that way and it's not about to start.'<p></p><p>The important factor at play here is this season the Moon has literally been mentioned so briefly and is now just a thing so far in the background it's less than an afterthought, Gordo gets mentioned more than the moon does. If Dev and Ed's plan fails, Mars will become as redundant as the moon and the likelihood will be if Goldilocks is anchored outside the earth's atmosphere, the money it would create would put an end to space travel for longer than this series plans to carry on for. </p><p>Whatever happens, I'm not frightened about a next season without Joel Kinnaman, Krys Marshall or Wren Schmidt in it, we have Coral Pena, Toby Kebble and Cynthi Wu to carry the torches and take the legacy even further. I want the treasures that Goldilocks gives to finance not only more asteroid mining and less poverty and inequality on the planet, I also want to see this series go to the next logical place in their quest for the stars - Jupiter and its moons. I want 2013 to be more like how we once dreamed 2050 would look; more Star Trek: Next Generation and less Planet of the Apes...</p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Next Time...</span></i></b></p><p>The finales of <b>Monarch</b> and <b>For All Mankind</b>. I might have a look at <b>Silo</b> which is also from Apple TV and seems to be much better than it appears on paper. We have stuff on iPlayer and the Flash Drive of Doom to dip into - this includes re-watching season one of <b>Legion</b> and the two series we didn't bother with (not because we didn't enjoy it, but because there was so much time between them). The wife is desperate for me to watch <b>Guilt</b> and there's usually something new that pops up on one network or another every week. Obviously there will be the usual stuff that I slag off in inventive ways.</p><p>The movie blog will follow this - maybe later today, maybe next week. We'll see how that all goes and whether this division of things works or not.</p><p><br /></p></div></div></div></div>Phil Hallhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12680058800847509275noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5979663737404474935.post-89067844681547359912023-12-31T09:55:00.000+00:002023-12-31T09:55:10.245+00:00Modern Culture - In Limbo Rubbish Reigns<p><i>Spoiler warning...</i></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Better Than the Real Thing?</span></i></b></p><p><b>Rebel Moon Part One: A Child of Fire</b> started Christmas off with a start. Let's be honest about this, people hated it because it does Star Wars much better than Star Wars has ever been. There's this nostalgic over-expectation that Star Wars is brilliant and everything that uses it as inspiration cannot possibly be given the same ground; it must therefore be inferior; it must be rubbish. The Guardian gave this a one star review; it's on 5.8 on IMDB two days after its release (now 5.7). Every rabid Star Wars fanboy is doing everything they can to make everyone else think this is a massive bucket of shit. Let me put you straight, this pisses over Star Wars films from a great height. This is everything Star Wars wants to be. Yes, it 'borrows' extensively from other films and ideas, but arguably so do most things, maybe not as blatantly. The people who loathe it perhaps don't understand entertainment and I make no apologies for enjoying this film. Its never going to be a masterpiece, but I think the Star Wars films are a load of wank and have no place in cinematic folklore.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjaaWhmNRAwU-S9AkyDXw9qUF9WJrlQwPCNe9lmjHioJHFKrfS9JP6SFPScine8AmwjOdrGhfrnCQpJ4pBAqVBN-3MwURRUvYHSUMsjwhVRv_BltZAA1GXCItTVCH5FpjQTwhE7iStVkwav4gmV93i-jAjEbeMENoqgZHGuN9TN7RUr2_mHU_-fEEZP8vZu" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="380" data-original-width="700" height="174" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjaaWhmNRAwU-S9AkyDXw9qUF9WJrlQwPCNe9lmjHioJHFKrfS9JP6SFPScine8AmwjOdrGhfrnCQpJ4pBAqVBN-3MwURRUvYHSUMsjwhVRv_BltZAA1GXCItTVCH5FpjQTwhE7iStVkwav4gmV93i-jAjEbeMENoqgZHGuN9TN7RUr2_mHU_-fEEZP8vZu" width="320" /></a></div>This is the Seven Samurai, it's the Magnificent Seven. it is in many ways Star Wars and it has some awful acting, everyone is overwrought and everyone is in full thespian mode - that is apart from Sofia Boutella, who isn't a very good actor. It's fast paced, it's action-packed, it's Zack Snyder and it's really not as bad as people will want you to believe. It's a little over two hours of exceptional film making, with arsehole villains and wannabe heroes. It's got some twists I - amazingly - didn't see coming, it has a relatively simple plot and if Ed Skrein turns up in the second part wearing black cape and a face mask then I will laugh out loud.<p></p><p>Boutella lives on a farming community that is invaded by the 'empire' who kick arse and kill a few people for most of the food produced by the peaceful farmers. They leave some army types to ensure the farmers' side of the deal is kept. They're nasty bastards and she despatches them faster than you can have a piss. She then goes to recruit the baddest asses in the known universe to fight the nastiest bastards - she assembles Wrexham FC to battle Man City, but one of the team is a skunk. I believe the girl at the farm, who doesn't do much but dish water out is maybe the daughter of the late king, somehow escaped from the death you don't see on screen and the 'Jimmy' voiced by Anthony Hopkins - a robot with the fighting prowess of 100 men - will start fighting again for the rebels. I also think the skunk might still be alive to play a crucial part in the conclusion. It's all a load of hokum and baloney but it's fun, it doesn't dawdle and Star Wars fans need to stop being so anally retentive.</p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Ooh Fancy A Goblin, Mate?</span></i></b></p><p>Ncuti Gatwa's solo debut as <b>Doctor Who</b> was essentially a pile of shite. We saw a completely different type of episode here, with a musical number, some dreadful special effects - on the Goblins - and while Ruby Sunday came across as an interesting new companion, just what kind of accent does the new Doctor have? Is it Irish, Scottish, Cornish - it wavers all over the place and occasionally there's some patois in there. Is he gay, straight, still metrosexual? I'm not sure his campness is really a family thing. On a different note, has anyone else noticed that if you lose Gatwa's moustache, he looks just like TV cook Nadya Hussein?</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjw2Pt7CVdcDxjYk9unCokO5uIoXv6Gh0K2F0TgYRH8GjDg_bLay9QbT4sawESyu8_NFFNxCO75nfsxFslqzShOXqxYJepd56aKWHNN7B-jZaL8pQTKq4DWR8HnWBYLRlJ1CDcsrwA7QGpqTOz9PIO1rcpYEiPdxfNm5tFZnfx20wLausM-67E1F9VIIbAp" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="630" data-original-width="1200" height="168" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjw2Pt7CVdcDxjYk9unCokO5uIoXv6Gh0K2F0TgYRH8GjDg_bLay9QbT4sawESyu8_NFFNxCO75nfsxFslqzShOXqxYJepd56aKWHNN7B-jZaL8pQTKq4DWR8HnWBYLRlJ1CDcsrwA7QGpqTOz9PIO1rcpYEiPdxfNm5tFZnfx20wLausM-67E1F9VIIbAp" width="320" /></a></div>I have always struggled with Christmas Specials, there's never much that is special about them and despite the appearance of a rather decrepit Anita Dobson - who knew what a Tardis was - this entire episode felt a little... slimy. It also harked back to Amy Pond's debut when Matt Smith had an influence on her life growing up and it all felt a little icky and contrived. I think the main thing about this... 'reboot' was that RTD was going to bring the 'special' back into a series that became a bit stale brown bread, but there was very little to really like about this and there was a few - I accept nitpicky - problems with it; the main one being that Ruby would NEVER have been adopted by a single black woman in 2004; it's almost unheard of in 2023 but for more cultural reasons than just general racism. I know this because I worked around the edges of the adoption system between 2002 and 2012. At least the new Doctor came up with some new look gadgets and accidentally/purposefully killed the main antagonist with a church spire, but the redeeming features were few and far between. A poor solo debut and the sneak peak of the next series doesn't fill me with a lot of anything but dread. <br /><p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Sherlock Superman</span></i></b></p><p>We started watching <b>Reacher</b> on Christmas Day; I was ill, there was the usual fuck all on telly and we'd spent the afternoon finishing season one of <b>Evil</b>, so we wanted something a bit different. First impressions? Is it a joke? Is it a parody? Is it really Sherlock Kent or Clark Holmes?</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiVIMS1bnvJv8pYP--4fshzBB8huh1E5CcejvI7qzH5CIgpkPTOPxqKc4gcxFhLzv-ERxVY13HonsdtHfyBLArGn8FgdQ6AT5-LsYuTJXjY-HKT72Wok9FCvcGnfr0QIcTfg5hASGLdF5XNKcKF6g_QrmlS_c4X73-aggdlqJsYlJRWYJ0RthM-jabY8jiJ" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="2333" data-original-width="3500" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiVIMS1bnvJv8pYP--4fshzBB8huh1E5CcejvI7qzH5CIgpkPTOPxqKc4gcxFhLzv-ERxVY13HonsdtHfyBLArGn8FgdQ6AT5-LsYuTJXjY-HKT72Wok9FCvcGnfr0QIcTfg5hASGLdF5XNKcKF6g_QrmlS_c4X73-aggdlqJsYlJRWYJ0RthM-jabY8jiJ" width="320" /></a></div>I mean, is it for real? I know the USA is a horrid place, but does shit like this really manage to happen in the Deep South without federal authorities getting involved? Don't get me wrong, the opening episodes were fun (after a fashion)... Alan Ritchson is one beefcake of a human being, but his acting range falls somewhere between house brick and corpse and with the exception of Willa Fitzgerald's Roscoe Conklin he's surrounded by arrogant, idiotic misogynists and fools, even the police captain, who is depicted as an intelligent man is a massive twat and as the small town of Margrave in Georgia (population 1300 with about 40 police officers) faces a spate of murders - all obviously related, yet somehow not in the eyes of the bent mayor cum new police chief. Reacher starts as a suspect (although I'm not quite sure why) and ends up being essential in the investigation. I've never read any Lee Childs, whose books these are based on, but I hope his work isn't as badly plotted and unbelievable as this series depicts them to be. As a result, when I suggested we continue watching the series on Boxing Day, the wife said she'd rather throw herself into a vat of shit, so that's the end of that.<p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Big Nose to Fill</span></i></b></p><p>Forget all the nonsense about Bradley Cooper having a prosthetic nose to play a Jewish composer when he isn't even Jewish; this was just inflammatory nonsense created by on-line trolls (probably Zionists) who have bugs up their collective arses about things most Jewish people wouldn't lose a second of sleep over; especially as Leonard Bernstein's own children endorsed the film and approved it. What you should focus on is essentially how fucking boring it is and what an absolute narcissistic pompous wanker Bernstein was. </p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiqIXUsmMHwcOXTrC96GRIAn508GKAEo6HKmABGgWZljtonRyu8cDY98xRZrAkBEUsRwUwZWMPLeUl-LLJ8Hqrnc4nH1q9KvXd0_URcvGxMcbiamWtQs84s2qn2cDHIYnY2rYkvSi_1jPUVR1omCVWf8I3C3yriPP9k_VMDKm1vmA-HFn6uS4D_Jn4x1jlE" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="237" data-original-width="474" height="160" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiqIXUsmMHwcOXTrC96GRIAn508GKAEo6HKmABGgWZljtonRyu8cDY98xRZrAkBEUsRwUwZWMPLeUl-LLJ8Hqrnc4nH1q9KvXd0_URcvGxMcbiamWtQs84s2qn2cDHIYnY2rYkvSi_1jPUVR1omCVWf8I3C3yriPP9k_VMDKm1vmA-HFn6uS4D_Jn4x1jlE" width="320" /></a></div><b>Maestro</b> will probably win awards, most likely for Carey Mulligan who is outstanding as Bernstein's wife Felicia Montealegre, who had to put up with her husband's overt homosexuality, the fact he was an absolute monstrous egotist and was the perfect example of privilege and entitlement. What this film does better than anything else is show what a complete cunt this genius of a composer was and how the upper classes of the New York set were amoral and elitist. It's also really fucking dull and long, but I said that already. It's a pretty straightforward biopic and I'm surprised the family endorsed something that painted their father in such an unflattering light; Cooper was excellent as the chain-smoking composer - and when I say chain-smoking, I mean there is barely a minute of the film where he doesn't have a fag in his mouth. It's ironic his wife died of lung cancer and he made it to 1990 and the age of 72 - he looked much older. This was in many ways a really unpleasant film, something I wouldn't recommend if you want entertainment.<br /><p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Evil Musings</span></i></b></p><p><b>Evil</b> has to be one of the oddest things we've watched in a long time; a kind of spiritual X-Files with added digs at the Catholic church. I know I've touched on this in the last couple of weeks, but we finished season one and immediately went into season two, which added sex, violence and swearing to beef up a series that strangely didn't really need it.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEi3Id1iqRH-MbmwMPP80GGHew1YCo9jyeFlo0wkWFqGB1sqVyRtKMCiX-iUayjy93lb9f8MRh9hTIOVY-N1OcWbx1mkCjEV14vOqj2gmqvoKt2Y-Y2yNTvF0e3Iq4RR4-vxTBhGZW3u36Co_GFbzW99QQ7AfEY8Fhr0eI9UE51Yh4s_mPS8rHidnuK0GHrU" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="1056" data-original-width="1584" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEi3Id1iqRH-MbmwMPP80GGHew1YCo9jyeFlo0wkWFqGB1sqVyRtKMCiX-iUayjy93lb9f8MRh9hTIOVY-N1OcWbx1mkCjEV14vOqj2gmqvoKt2Y-Y2yNTvF0e3Iq4RR4-vxTBhGZW3u36Co_GFbzW99QQ7AfEY8Fhr0eI9UE51Yh4s_mPS8rHidnuK0GHrU" width="320" /></a></div>As we finished season two, the most accurate thing I can say about it is I'm not sure what we're watching any longer; there appears to be multiples strands of plot being followed and it has taken on a whole new level of surreal and ludicrous. There's still a lot wrong with it, but the creators - Robert and Michelle King - appear to feel that throwing a shed load of shit at the fan is better than just a tiny bit. It also feels like a slow descent into hell for almost every character as we wrestle with evil fertility clinics, angels scarier than demons, UFOs, rogue cops, demonic cops, madness, science, exorcisms by proxy, self-harm, body dysmorphia, casual sex, cults, tapeworms, botflies, cannibalism, a villain that literally no one takes seriously, wankers, djinns, inconsistent plotting and everything in between. It's like a fever dream made for network TV and things happen in it that will literally have you gasping or whooping in disbelief. It's highly addictive but also a little bit... cheesy. There needs to be some sort of resolution at some point, or maybe just a closing of a few of the plots, because it's a bit like a soap opera at the moment; it just carries on and nothing is resolved. There is no closure for anyone - a little like purgatory, I suppose.<div><p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Shitty SCHOTY</span></i></b></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgdqtav_DA3hVYKTk8H6zq-8mRvRdw5ZPNWljeeWRlgY-uSnQ3d8ENE-c0xhdhvCKjkk9JNx4JMzwHiL4S7Z91zrs3x1JO6jPFud3nJHdU4ISk3liwfWudLKHQzk1dm-D82E2TxD1SQQLZmeXyc0cY36E5vBPhoGV5Cu-UCSG22ScSR6p6eLjfodgpcc8tX" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="261" data-original-width="464" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgdqtav_DA3hVYKTk8H6zq-8mRvRdw5ZPNWljeeWRlgY-uSnQ3d8ENE-c0xhdhvCKjkk9JNx4JMzwHiL4S7Z91zrs3x1JO6jPFud3nJHdU4ISk3liwfWudLKHQzk1dm-D82E2TxD1SQQLZmeXyc0cY36E5vBPhoGV5Cu-UCSG22ScSR6p6eLjfodgpcc8tX" width="320" /></a></div>Maybe Kate Spiers and Michael Angus weren't... flamboyant enough for <b>Scotland's Home of the Year</b>, but their two charisma free replacements do nothing for the show and in this first post old presenters foray - the Christmas home 2023 - you might feel that this is now about the presenters rather than the houses they assess. 'Buckeroo' Banjo Beale, the campest Antipodean man on Mull, is back from his guest presenter stint as a full time replacement and if this man is a 'style guru' then he really should look at himself first - he's an abominable mess. The newest guy - a 25 year old Glaswegian architect - is as interesting as week old emulsion and both these men have enormous feet. They join Anna Campbell Jones - always the weakest (and least Scottish) of the presenters - on the team that doesn't appear to have a personality between them, but they are enamoured with <i>each other</i>. I might leave the next series to the wife to watch on her own, unless we can watch it with the sound off. Another example of something being 'fixed' that didn't need it and I am aware that Spiers left to have a baby, but Angus was perhaps too Scottish and 'of a time'. <p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Legacy of Boredom</span></i></b></p><p>In many ways <b>Monarch: Legacy of Monsters</b> deserves some kind of award; perhaps most inconsistently written show of 2023? I appreciate we're talking about a TV series based around Legendary's Monsterverse or whatever it's called and we have King Kong, Godzilla and a number of other fabulous creatures, but the bits with the humans in it are about as exciting as watching two old bastards playing draughts. It's just really dull and I actually think it's acting as a bridging exercise for the <b>New Empire</b> film coming in 2024, because I can't understand the point of it otherwise, because it's not achieving anything else.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEibtv30wg8SqiXd3ORVVGr65BRbG7We7zzaL6-msHyKvve76d3ZfsEM7dA9Xa01vphwngdkZzR5yk0NmAFQbVk67o5zprmgUdUetrjcEMAm0qBZE-uMAqH6MWkU1a6eU0Wn7BaalZio_nbRy4IMXyH1F6xtXmlJy-sJOhFczMbY9d5L3Y0QRdMV9218VtSt" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="242" data-original-width="474" height="163" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEibtv30wg8SqiXd3ORVVGr65BRbG7We7zzaL6-msHyKvve76d3ZfsEM7dA9Xa01vphwngdkZzR5yk0NmAFQbVk67o5zprmgUdUetrjcEMAm0qBZE-uMAqH6MWkU1a6eU0Wn7BaalZio_nbRy4IMXyH1F6xtXmlJy-sJOhFczMbY9d5L3Y0QRdMV9218VtSt" width="320" /></a></div>Having characters where the viewer doesn't know whose side they're on from one moment to another, or what they're planning on doing or why they're doing it, who continually change depending on whatever half-arsed writer is co-opted in to write whatever week's episode just doesn't make for good TV and while we briefly saw some kind of monster at the end of this eighth episode and we got some explanations about 1955, this was really about whether the viewer has the stamina or the willpower to stick with a series that doesn't seem to know what it's doing or what it's trying to convey. I really wanted to like this; I found positives when others were struggling to find their best disparaging words to slag it off, but it feels like this was written by AI and a very basic one at that. There are two more episodes left and the finale is subtitled 'Beyond Logic' which could easily have been the actual title of the entire show: Monarch - Beyond Logic. This has turned out to be a really uninteresting and dull slog; like trying to have a wank to <b>Bluey</b>. <br /><p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Double Crosses & Lies</span></i></b></p><p>If I had to stick my neck out about the conclusion of series four of <b>For All Mankind</b> it would probably be Kelly Baldwin discovering life on Mars; this has been the almost forgotten subplot in the entire fourth season and one thing you learn about this show is that everything means something or it wouldn't be there. However, the main thrust of this eighth episode has been Dev and Ed's plan to sabotage the Earth's plan for Goldilocks, but that hasn't been exclusively the main element...</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgF2rudHZi94gPPW3j4sH7Cl1PPKnO7aLbvZgf1eN3hwCv4CGGQ7soZSqBhbuK6_XawsQ-cu8ZQGf-_7fwkf884e7kJuwKp7YoQxOMAsUnuLC0yXe2vdgI7TTtD_IzLHwbfifE9s2BSA1c546H1qsyCuxETfLgvBQQt0sNsnZrdBn4BR5kmxVLKSrm3mvDk" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="300" data-original-width="400" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgF2rudHZi94gPPW3j4sH7Cl1PPKnO7aLbvZgf1eN3hwCv4CGGQ7soZSqBhbuK6_XawsQ-cu8ZQGf-_7fwkf884e7kJuwKp7YoQxOMAsUnuLC0yXe2vdgI7TTtD_IzLHwbfifE9s2BSA1c546H1qsyCuxETfLgvBQQt0sNsnZrdBn4BR5kmxVLKSrm3mvDk" width="320" /></a></div>This episode starts off with Sergei, the forgotten man in the Margo Maddison story - the reason why Margo had to defect to the USSR - who now is desperate to see her again in what appears to be just a chance to reconnect with his lost love, but you soon discover there's far more to this meeting than just unrequited love. The irony is Sergei needs Aleida's help to fulfil his wishes and in doing so he reveals to her the real reason for Margo's defection and what it means to be a defector in the USSR. However, arranging such a meeting is a logistical nightmare because Margo is chaperoned by a Soviet KGB agent and a marine.<p></p><p>Back on Mars, Ed recruits his grandson to become a cat burglar, while Miles and the rest of the below deck crew discover that the USA, NASA and Helios are more like the Soviets than they could possibly believe so not only is their bar and contraband service shut down, trying to capture Goldilocks for Mars and hijack all of Earth's plans is going to be an almost impossible task. Two episodes to go and while this series hasn't had the exploratory brilliance of the first three, it has been more than above your average excellent TV series. I'm already wondering what 2013 will be like and how much more than can age Ed and Margo, or if either of them will even be in it.</p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Fishy Hogmanay</span></i></b></p><p>I suppose you expect a witty and vibrant subhead for every entry, do you? Well sometimes it's just not possible. Sometimes I'd like to be wrong about TV shows when I forecast a gradual decline, but it seems when I declared that <b>Whitehouse and Mortimer: Gone Fishing</b> was reaching the end of its life I wasn't factually correct, but in spirit I might have been...</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgoloduBVQ3fdLcW7CL7AGT86MKRIjfB-W45SKsiVxUfYvAPl3M_cfXfOIcpp8ofTGxthJ__ITcv0hG5Zzv2WyW279Rphxcck_jhoHD4JkrMJFwZctpAuhd7zD3gI0NbC2Q0kgyLKFl8Rfzef6dhU4az5o8eb70RNtBCmdxxVZv1QwN7zrhcxUyFVvTgEiP" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="279" data-original-width="465" height="192" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgoloduBVQ3fdLcW7CL7AGT86MKRIjfB-W45SKsiVxUfYvAPl3M_cfXfOIcpp8ofTGxthJ__ITcv0hG5Zzv2WyW279Rphxcck_jhoHD4JkrMJFwZctpAuhd7zD3gI0NbC2Q0kgyLKFl8Rfzef6dhU4az5o8eb70RNtBCmdxxVZv1QwN7zrhcxUyFVvTgEiP" width="320" /></a></div>The <b>Hogmanay Special</b> was an hour of barrel-scraping, if I want to be brutally honest; but I suppose there are reasons for this and some of them were explored in this 'special'. Bob has had an awful year of health and we learned that shingles can be extremely serious as you get older; the former partner of Vic Reeves looked older and frailer than he's ever looked since his heart surgery and Paul seemed far more receptive and involved, seeming to want to spend more time with his pal than fish. If this had been a final episode it would have been apt, even if very few fish were caught during the entire filming. There were some guests - Arabella Weir, looking fantastic for 66, and Clare Grogan, looking like someone's great gran at 61 - and the usual nice shots of the countryside, this time in Scotland - hence the title. It was also filmed probably either late September or early October, but the boys were mindful of this. Maybe it is time for the BBC to send this boat back to harbour.<br /><p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Thoroughbreds</span></i></b></p><p>The third season of <b>Slow Horses</b> has been anything but slow. It started quickly and barrelled its way through like an escaped racehorse hurtling along Epsom Downs. This spy and espionage thriller returned and it never fails to impress or shock. It proves that <i>most </i>of the output from Apple TV is excellent and if you're thinking of dumping one streaming channel for another then you should dump any of them for this one.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjQzQ7RXxDTVNRn2PkBOpz5Ic4blXiiwwJALWcWB5ajbFmYQRJe5wl6p0EaHhF-b3U1Gs_5sSKVbqjx1RylloPSCMOeRENPYimzaUDGPa89x_C01VPDm5Dcee0QUcPe8nOzjfxUTfLmF5-cNdGY2mqobkPzRLit1psaOGwhREg9HxN7CGHGVDoGyp19_n6E" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="266" data-original-width="474" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjQzQ7RXxDTVNRn2PkBOpz5Ic4blXiiwwJALWcWB5ajbFmYQRJe5wl6p0EaHhF-b3U1Gs_5sSKVbqjx1RylloPSCMOeRENPYimzaUDGPa89x_C01VPDm5Dcee0QUcPe8nOzjfxUTfLmF5-cNdGY2mqobkPzRLit1psaOGwhREg9HxN7CGHGVDoGyp19_n6E" width="320" /></a></div>In a Christmas of poor television and the low par shite we've subjected ourselves to this has been a proper TV show with an excellent cast and a hero who is one part Sherlock, one part Kreskin and one part Wayne Slob - it could be Gary Oldman's finest acting role and as Jackson Lamb he is always one step ahead of whatever is going on and able to infiltrate himself into the unlikeliest of situations. This time around it's a 'Tiger Team' threat, which goes wrong. A 'Tiger Team' is a rogue outfit set up to infiltrate and challenge the security systems of an organisation - this time MI5; but when some of the team involved in this embarrassing exposure decide that they want answers to something else - something they can't have - it spirals out of control and it's up to the Slough House crew to outdo their MI5 'betters' yet again and, naturally, involved in this is the now home secretary Peter Judd played by Samuel West, whose mug seems to crop up at all the wrong times when Slough House has a job to do. We've watched three series over the last six weeks and it's quite gutting that we're going to have to wait a year before the next one comes along.<br /><p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Next Year...</span></i></b></p><p>The return of some old favourites - I hope. Maybe some new favourites - I'm sceptical. Things we'll not bother with - I'm sure. The strikes in Hollywood might curtail a lot of the expected in 2024, but I'm relatively confident a long winter of some form of entertainment to banish the blues is on the cards and hopefully a positive year with little real life drama. </p><p>It would be nice to have a year where we don't question the point of existence. Have a better New Year and instead of celebrating 2024, perhaps have a piss out of the back door just as the bells start.</p></div>Phil Hallhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12680058800847509275noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5979663737404474935.post-38780196020970198922023-12-29T13:03:00.000+00:002023-12-29T13:03:13.329+00:00Phil's New Year Message<p><b>Crawling from the Wreckage...</b></p><p>In my 61Β½ years, I've experienced a few really shit years. 1998, 2003 and 2016 stick out like sore thumbs, but they were no means isolated. When we were told as children that the 21st century would bring a time of unparalleled leisure, wealth and happiness that was code for 'as life continues things will get shittier than you could possibly imagine.' </p><p>2023 has been one clusterfuck after another. I can barely point at one person I know who can't give you an example of what a shit year this has been. Deaths, illness, bad luck, injuries, intolerance and the clouds that hung over this year did not have silver linings, they just harboured some new and insidious way to fuck up lives.</p><p>I've never been able to understand the desire to believe in God - whatever god whatever religion believes in - if there was a god, there is no way on earth he is a benign benefactor; he or she is a cruel nasty and pernicious deity who is as random as a lottery winner and is most likely a crutch created to keep the masses under control and give people a reason for their existence. if god is love, it is also hate, lies, death and cruelty. If a god truly existed why would a child be given an incurable deadly illness and why would despots, cowards and murderers rise to positions of power, where they themselves can be godlike in their judgements?</p><p>As 2023 slides away, to be consigned to the worst areas of our memories and looked back on with scorn rather than fond memories, I have a few things I'd like you to consider in 2024. I'm not a conspiracy theorist and I don't subscribe to nutty ideas and beliefs, but the simple advice I have for anyone reading this might sound like I'm heading in that direction...</p><p>* Do not believe the press. If you hear something in any mainstream media outlet you should question it; you should show scepticism towards it, because the mainstream media has an agenda and that agenda ranges from making you want to blame someone for a government's failings to believing a narrative they're giving you rather than finding out whether every newspaper or TV news channel around the globe is saying the same thing. Ask yourself why certain language is always used; why the people they tell you are right are always right and more importantly whether they are actually right or it's just sophisticated propaganda designed to make you toe a line. The press is now so biased, with its own agenda, you should question it even if it tells you the sky is blue and rain is wet.</p><p>* Do not believe politicians. Especially if those politicians represent a major political party. Conservative, Labour, Liberal, Democrat, Republican - left, right or middle - there is an agenda there and usually that agenda panders to the richest and most powerful non-politicians. If you think this is bullshit, ask yourself why there is lobbying in every major 'democracy' in the world? Ask yourself why politicians and people related to them are somehow granted privileges that the average person does not receive and all because <i style="font-weight: bold;">you</i> voted for them. Politicians are elected, by you, to represent YOU and the country's interests. Politicians and governments should have a duty of care for <i>all</i> the people who live in a country, not just the ones they like. Further to this, you should also never trust a politician that denies basic rights to voters. In short, never trust a politician.</p><p>* I have an overwhelming desire to tell people to try and be nice to each other, but unfortunately it doesn't matter how hard you try, others won't. 2016 opened the floodgates for intolerance and hatred towards our fellow men, women and children. The internet probably has more trolls and inciteful entities now than ever before; it appears the internet is now a tool to widen divisions created in the last ten years and it is very effective. If I had to make a New Year resolution it would probably be to try and ignore the people who use the internet to sow hatred and division and not just through prejudice but by being provocative, by seeming to take a moral high ground where none exists. The world now views beliefs as more important than facts and this is prevalent on the internet because to challenge someone's beliefs is like telling someone they have rubbish taste in some form of culture. The problem with beliefs is they are not born of facts; a person can believe in something that is patently not true, but because it is a belief, they will view any effort to change that belief as the lie. The dilemma is whether to challenge someone or just allow their beliefs to seep into the consciousnesses of the wilfully ignorant. That is a decision only <i>you</i> can make.</p><p>* Choose your own paths. Do not be swayed by any of the above. Individualism appears to be dying out in favour of a general hive minded attitude, so stay real and honest and remember above all else to tell the people you love that you love them and try to accept there are some absolute cunts out there who you will never change, so inwardly pray that karma fucks them over so bad they never bother decent humans again.</p><p>May 2024 be a better year than we could hope for. </p>Phil Hallhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12680058800847509275noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5979663737404474935.post-19728686611451548842023-12-24T12:57:00.000+00:002023-12-24T12:57:34.902+00:00Pop Culture - I Wish it Could be Christmas Every 100 Years<p><i>It's Christmas and this will spoil some of your fun...</i></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Martian Mayhem</span></i></b></p><p>In what was the shortest episode in the four seasons of <b>For All Mankind</b> - just 41 minutes - a lot happened. Margo returned to Houston much to the chagrin of just about everyone, while Ed and the Helios employees took the strike to the limit.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjHpAgOyXeuKdB3mLJF5dahu5oE5FKh4JmQhXiM2vVb1pmCZ-57KnLQc0IX8ws0W6UqAOv8idbk3MTQMohYFq9EoHbfHw_i2p9LmIPTQaqDAgUBsdMzAVEKa_InM0rert7jFdVonMTYh7g__1WfdCOIypm8NGkgne0-gVJU-dUJfHKpzLJJ26yMkNwqpId-" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="237" data-original-width="474" height="160" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjHpAgOyXeuKdB3mLJF5dahu5oE5FKh4JmQhXiM2vVb1pmCZ-57KnLQc0IX8ws0W6UqAOv8idbk3MTQMohYFq9EoHbfHw_i2p9LmIPTQaqDAgUBsdMzAVEKa_InM0rert7jFdVonMTYh7g__1WfdCOIypm8NGkgne0-gVJU-dUJfHKpzLJJ26yMkNwqpId-" width="320" /></a></div>There was a reunion as Kelly and her son arrive on Mars, but Ed's grandson clearly doesn't like his grandfather, who struggles with kids. Dev goes from Zero to potential hero when he teams up with Ed to save the future of the Mars colony and Aleida's joy at seeing Margo alive has been completely replaced by a raging contempt for the defector because it's clear that a lot of her personal issues - PTSD etc - are probably as a direct result of believing her friend and mentor to be dead for nearly a decade. This might have been a short episode but it packed plenty of punches.<p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Not Rockin' Around the Monster-less Tree</span></i></b></p><p>The wife has reached the point where she's not bothered if we continue watching <b>Monarch: Legacy of Monsters</b>. The reason is simple seven episodes in and there's about a 50% success rate. This week's only got a 5.7 rating on IMDB and that was because it focussed on Mae or Cora (her real name). Her involvement in this and the company she screwed over might have bearing on the series but frankly I don't care.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEj2QQdOpE_tNo9dE9c0-v78SCZg--ZirEdH9hmI1Q6V-LJedfUZaa_e7SRx8_NVmjhwa1a-GBrmDUDsfIO6LzLGH9RH3igri10lGBp3359sq2nOWfv_6yYwkbmIfegE4t8WhG16dNVti4YyXHQrGeywU3gUDxKXYmPgFTCxfcAk6LBALD39kTH4zAThrYO-" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="266" data-original-width="474" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEj2QQdOpE_tNo9dE9c0-v78SCZg--ZirEdH9hmI1Q6V-LJedfUZaa_e7SRx8_NVmjhwa1a-GBrmDUDsfIO6LzLGH9RH3igri10lGBp3359sq2nOWfv_6yYwkbmIfegE4t8WhG16dNVti4YyXHQrGeywU3gUDxKXYmPgFTCxfcAk6LBALD39kTH4zAThrYO-" width="320" /></a></div>The writers also need to sit down with each other and give the two main female characters some continuity because Cate flipflops between brave and fearless and paranoid and frightened depending on who writes her and Mae is just a car crash of a character who shouldn't have even been included in this; they make a nonsense of the narrative. Oh and Tim, the Monarch agent is also inconsistently written; he goes from sinister to friendly between scenes. I'll stick with this but it really needs monsters in it because when they're not in it it's a lifeless heap of shit.<p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Not Rhetorical</span></i></b></p><p>I know I said last week I wouldn't bother reviewing this as I'd pretty much done it, but it's not a review, as such. Watching <b>The Outsider</b> again was a real treat. It's a great little series with an excellent cast and it's based on one of Stephen King's best novels of the last 25 years. However, one thing bothered me about it and that thing is this: "Hey Steve, we at HBO love your book <i>The Outsider</i>. We'd like to make this critically-acclaimed, best selling novel of yours into a 10-part TV series and here's a list of things that we think might improve on your story..."</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEj1liT4ZEy1wbQD1pXMmWgyLsM7JbQBQ7s6okpjj57bTWjMUtNUMFgh_ce8zkoe-J66Ja_Hh0KV2QX_Ma0Y5EdidfnFa8SNdLyffK8vzLQ4hbAyJYu4ignYiCW1tvw-766mQd3f0d4u_uApbQiEf981zTxOEppY0rOLnU9NtcUXOi-RiHLPlNSTQDQqSpbO" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="360" data-original-width="640" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEj1liT4ZEy1wbQD1pXMmWgyLsM7JbQBQ7s6okpjj57bTWjMUtNUMFgh_ce8zkoe-J66Ja_Hh0KV2QX_Ma0Y5EdidfnFa8SNdLyffK8vzLQ4hbAyJYu4ignYiCW1tvw-766mQd3f0d4u_uApbQiEf981zTxOEppY0rOLnU9NtcUXOi-RiHLPlNSTQDQqSpbO" width="320" /></a></div>The thing is, that must be how the conversation went because like I said the book is awesome and yet the adaptation seems to cover the first quarter of the book inside an hour - the first episode and the opening ten minutes of the second. It then essentially neglects loads of vital information - either ignores it completely or makes up new stuff that wasn't in the book. This is the pattern for most of the rest of the series; it's still bloody good TV but it literally changes everything to some degree or another. It creates characters who weren't in the book, omits characters that were, and changes characters so that they do almost the same job as they did in the book but are different characters with different dynamism. It also pads the story out - it didn't need it - by extending the role of Holly Gibney, giving her a different backstory (which I can understand why as she is also a character in <b>Mr Mercedes</b>), introducing a love interest and most annoying, changing her character the further into the episodes we go. She literally starts off as an autistic savant talking about building heights and makes of car while following all kinds of OCD patterns and ends it being almost human with a sense of humour who hugs people. The fact that the conclusion was so little like that of the book was staggering. The book would have worked as a screenplay for a TV series, why there had to be so many changes even down to little things was, in my eyes, disrespectful.<p></p><p>I have seen a number of King adaptations, as well as other books I've read and I really struggle to understand the logic of the production companies and what really established writers must think when their stories are changed - the plots stays the same (essentially) but the production company decides to change every fucking thing about the story apart from the bare bones. I'd probably never have had anything I'd written adapted because I'd refuse to have my work bastardised in such a way - not that that is ever going to happen, I know, but principles and all that... I wonder if it has something to do with control? <br /></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">The Family Flop?</span></i></b></p><p>Sometimes films are like football matches - games of two halves. With <b>The Family Plan</b> it was very much the case. The first half of the film, although slightly silly was entertaining and cleverly done, however the second half of the film drifted into the region I like to call total bollocks.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEh586Xn4CL61JKPOOvgMIebyYtZ6_XWFvSUfpydupgNzUIUh8C8uYugat_TzuJuiJ34g5nw7ip686bQp5I2-TiE1QRLr9jAPJZnUSnk309B-dNhocelprMeMNyFwhYKhymPIwnTgzK0r16dC1QZe-jRGkGYtpn6AmSXw06Fz10yiGZCQvN0BZh34L8xePdl" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="266" data-original-width="474" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEh586Xn4CL61JKPOOvgMIebyYtZ6_XWFvSUfpydupgNzUIUh8C8uYugat_TzuJuiJ34g5nw7ip686bQp5I2-TiE1QRLr9jAPJZnUSnk309B-dNhocelprMeMNyFwhYKhymPIwnTgzK0r16dC1QZe-jRGkGYtpn6AmSXw06Fz10yiGZCQvN0BZh34L8xePdl" width="320" /></a></div>I suppose a film starring Mark Wahlberg and Michelle Monaghan isn't really going to be an A list movie and I don't mean that in any disparaging way, it's just that Monaghan had her moments about 15 years ago and Wahlberg is the poor man's Matt Damon. This film about a former contract killer who has spent nearly 18 years living a normal life with a wife and three kids who suddenly, through some arseholes at a fair, has his life turned upside down by social media; this is because the people he escaped have spent the last 18 years waiting for him to resurface and are now out to kill him and anyone who's with him. This is the part that works, albeit in a not brilliant way that needed more things happening.<p></p><p>The second half of the film is where it all falls apart especially when we discover the relationship between Wahlberg's character and the people who want him dead. I think the biggest problem with this storyline was having a psychopath as the chief protagonist given who he was and what he was doing - it didn't stack up on any level and CiarΓ‘n Hinds was badly miscast, as was Maggie Q who was obviously something to do with the plot from the moment she appeared in some of the opening scenes and had this been even slightly realistic would have dealt with the 'problem' without letting it go across the USA. It was okay, but was a bit stinky and going a little green around the edges. <br /></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Marvel News</span></i></b></p><p>Jonathan Majors has been fired by Marvel and it throws the entire Kang story into turmoil [So what?]. Rumours have it that John Boyega might replace him, other rumours have Dr Doom. The bottom line is no one really cares, especially as there will only be one Marvel film next year and that will be <b>Deadpool 3</b> and that probably won't have much bearing on anything in the grand scheme of things. The MCU franchise is dead in the water; <b>The Marvels</b> has flopped badly at the box office and the belief is that Kevin Feige might be walking before he's kicked; again, no one really cares. I think Marvel/Disney will see how James Gunn does with his first couple of films at DC before making any firm commitment to anything in the future.</p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Extra Large</span></i></b></p><p><b>QI</b> is back with a Christmas special and while Sandi Toksvig looked a little tired, rumours of her not being able to carry on after a severe case of pneumonia seem misplaced. This opener for the U series also managed to get a Jimmy Carr joke about Stephen Fry into it as the original presenter got a mention. Fry's National Treasure status may take something of a hammering over Christmas when he gives his Alternative King's Speech on the rise of Anti-Semitism, which given the borderline Nazi behaviour of the Israeli government and army at present in their act of zero tolerant revenge on anyone who might be remotely Palestinian, could see something of a backlash against a man who usually talks an awful lot of sense.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgqV3qLQ7xauRAarwEJ9l-F-BqsXGGTqfrrLtB11knlPtxI4LAzvxuM2phhOjBwDmOcIChd8MxWMJ9_9rdOAahtPLvyvnqhGwrZ-9_l68_OZqu47kD7QGnKoF3asOYE1_vrQRht8mIDbJ1T0HwKhs6A-cie8rbjrOSfadb0kWqod900C7hd4uJsttaCU5iH" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="266" data-original-width="474" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgqV3qLQ7xauRAarwEJ9l-F-BqsXGGTqfrrLtB11knlPtxI4LAzvxuM2phhOjBwDmOcIChd8MxWMJ9_9rdOAahtPLvyvnqhGwrZ-9_l68_OZqu47kD7QGnKoF3asOYE1_vrQRht8mIDbJ1T0HwKhs6A-cie8rbjrOSfadb0kWqod900C7hd4uJsttaCU5iH" width="320" /></a></div>Anyhow, <b>QI</b> usually provides a lot of laughs and this week was no exception, but I wonder if it's beginning to grow a little stale. After this current series there's likely to be a maximum of five more series, that depends on whether they can get enough material for X, Y and Z, so we might only see three and maybe that might be a good thing. In terms of catching the panel out, every series that's on usually has an answer that is so contrary or science specific that it renders accepted answers wrong and this week we discovered that the word vegetables only exists in culinary (and everyday) use, but if you spoke to a botanist the word vegetable is just a generic term and doesn't mean anything. Obviously Alan Davies fell into this trap, like he usually does, but it proves that a lot of <b>QI</b>'s quite interesting facts are tricksy answers depending on the semantics of science rather than accepted facts<p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Nasty TV</span></i></b></p><p>I know I said I wasn't going to review anything/everything I touched on last week and I'd just dip in and out. Well, having written a critique of <b>The Outsider</b> above, I find myself wanting to talk about an episode of <b>Evil</b> that I have to say was something of an epiphany. A truly outstanding episode of television with a disturbing twist.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhGFcwBfVb0__upadwbJRX3urdrSIOlm9HaZj5jUd6ckntgjgmhr8ku9Ca_tNWuiNGMFrNLU1iyWL7dX5n8XniSmzFHxoS2XIZTNKR9XbE0wEnbZvwB0rANOR4bQ8cASS8-2P4yJCxDgeWmSZ0M3yKqYxjnt1z_SsiJb2Yss8cl1uvs6BWr-FY0WCGn-bKs" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="968" data-original-width="1500" height="207" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhGFcwBfVb0__upadwbJRX3urdrSIOlm9HaZj5jUd6ckntgjgmhr8ku9Ca_tNWuiNGMFrNLU1iyWL7dX5n8XniSmzFHxoS2XIZTNKR9XbE0wEnbZvwB0rANOR4bQ8cASS8-2P4yJCxDgeWmSZ0M3yKqYxjnt1z_SsiJb2Yss8cl1uvs6BWr-FY0WCGn-bKs" width="320" /></a></div>If I want to be honest, the first three episodes of this CBS series were all right; nothing special but a clever idea with some neat ideas. What appealed to both of us was the fact that despite having a truly evil character in it - Leland Townsend - the stories had pretty much all had a rational explanation rooted firmly in reality. Then along came <i>Rose390</i>, the fourth episode in season one. This was a two-handed story; the first involving Kristen's four children being given VR headsets where one of the games appeared to be considerably nastier than it appeared on the box - this is something I think will be returned to in future episodes. It was the other story that pretty much blows you away because it really was ... evil.<p></p><p>There's a 12 year old boy who terrifies his parents to the point he is locked in his room, the rest of the family are all barricaded into the parents bedrooms and the boy is a nasty, vindictive little fucker who scares the shit out of his other family members. What is memorable about Eric McCrystal are his black as night eyes, his expressionless features and the fact he is a psychopath - whether that is through demonic possession or just mental health issues is never fully realised because the outcome of the story was genuinely disturbing; I mean, the kind of conclusion that has you look at whoever is sitting next to you and saying 'did that just end the way I think it did?' It was an excellent episode and one that will pretty much guarantee our continued watching of this show. A truly nasty but brilliant piece of TV that garners a reaction from the main cast that you would expect when something utterly fucking mind-blowing happens. Sadly the episode that followed it was... below par. </p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">At Least It Was Short...</span></i></b></p><p>So, <b>A Murder at the End of the World</b> had lots of nonsense and red herrings, stupid actions and between the wife and I we worked out who the murderer was by the end of the first episode, so don't read my review of this from seven weeks ago or it will 'spoil' it for you (Ha ha ha ha ha ha). Utter bollocks from start to finish; the kind of thing that makes proper wannabe writers despair at how this kind of fucking vomit gets commissioned. Pointless, pathetic and a waste of 8 hours of mine and anyone else's life. You will get more enjoyment from putting your genitals in a blender. The final part was 39 minutes long - this was a six part series that had the final episode split into two.</p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">The Cloverfield Bollocks</span></i></b></p><p>"Have we seen <b>The Cloverfield Paradox</b>?" Asked the wife. I nodded and said, "Yes, but over five years ago. I figured if we've watched the first two in the last year maybe we should watch the third one." "Stick it on," she said. So I did. Everything I remembered about it, I still pretty much remembered. The rest was not important.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjETkc8hwbpK83rkNZEE46IMLuCUnrZXTjXbmY6teuFMOwG2J0X4QZcru3tbTmvDpWHrnP7cKJ9Ih_q6bRlRNynadn_k34zT5GjW8dl7eCTgrutPpva0QrtDhaGlEkMNkOiT2cSHzsXgrN9UcwCt01f1pBrNpbNSfSXcJK7RoLgcPdrd6XEqzUdZe6pCrwD" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="2448" data-original-width="3264" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjETkc8hwbpK83rkNZEE46IMLuCUnrZXTjXbmY6teuFMOwG2J0X4QZcru3tbTmvDpWHrnP7cKJ9Ih_q6bRlRNynadn_k34zT5GjW8dl7eCTgrutPpva0QrtDhaGlEkMNkOiT2cSHzsXgrN9UcwCt01f1pBrNpbNSfSXcJK7RoLgcPdrd6XEqzUdZe6pCrwD" width="320" /></a></div>I remembered that it felt like two separate movies that had been stitched together, or rather a film that had other bits stitched on to make it seem like the same film. I think this was a film about parallel universes and how an experiment on a space station caused one group of people to find themselves in another reality, not too dissimilar to the one they were in. What JJ Abrams team did was figure they could use this idea to try and make sense of the Cloverfield idea by suggesting the thing that swaps the realities opened up a dimension that allowed monsters out. This barely infringed on the space station idea; yes there was stuff that suggested the two films were the same one, but if you look closely you can see that none of the monstery bits before the monsters appeared happened when all the cast were on screen and the only time Gugu Mbatha-Raw appears with her 'husband' was in a scene at the beginning that could easily have been tagged on post production.<p></p><p>It's as dodgy as fuck, to be honest with you. I mean Chris O'Dowd is in it; he loses his arm and is jolly about it. There's no real explanation for all the weird shit that happens, such as O'Dowd's detached arm telling everyone - through the mode of handwriting - that the thing they need to escape wherever they are is inside the Russian who exploded earthworms everywhere. Considering how successful JJ Abrams was for about a decade, I'm surprised he kept his name attached to this pile of horseshit - a film with few, if any, redeeming qualities.</p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Saint Vinnie (or is it Greg?)</span></i></b></p><p>The unexpected but quite welcome <b>A Very Brassic Christmas</b> turned up and in many ways it was better than most of the last series, ironically it was set before the last series and humorously where most of the last series was allegedly set in the summer, but filmed in the winter, this was set at Christmas and filmed in the summer...</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiJuZKK4FZyeCqlGUCgZls-EBw-s2LoTHvMfwP6d2LwWwqfNgvISErAvK05nLygj1xxRP5RlCD3VKKXhoJhfPZtq7V0TcAJ7JF2x9VN7XsTYYeuaCi7BRMO5JAo7R-ZlgYQTLZMo6xrlN1vD2-FtrdqyG7vjQMF4C9yLz9JLBmgsuDSmvbwRIsB809u_XMy" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="266" data-original-width="474" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiJuZKK4FZyeCqlGUCgZls-EBw-s2LoTHvMfwP6d2LwWwqfNgvISErAvK05nLygj1xxRP5RlCD3VKKXhoJhfPZtq7V0TcAJ7JF2x9VN7XsTYYeuaCi7BRMO5JAo7R-ZlgYQTLZMo6xrlN1vD2-FtrdqyG7vjQMF4C9yLz9JLBmgsuDSmvbwRIsB809u_XMy" width="320" /></a></div>Imelda Staunton stole the show - literally and metaphorically - as Doctor Chris's aunt Edie, a thoroughly miserable curmudgeonly old woman who hates everyone and everything. Vinnie - Joe Gilgun - is asked by Chris to keep an eye on his aunt over Christmas because she had a fall at home and he was worried she wouldn't be able to cope and Vinnie, being essentially an angel with tattoos and a weed addiction ended up taking the old woman under his wing and yet again doing something that belied his status as a criminal. Edie didn't like the name Vincent, so she insists on calling him Greg, oddly enough Greg Davies was also a guest star in this playing the twattish Dick Dolphin (real name) or Mr Christmas and it was pretty much a story about Vinnie looking after an old lady while trying to salvage his son's Christmas nativity play. It might not have been as riotous and hilariously surreal as some episodes, but it was an extremely lovely Christmas special with a happy ending. It more than made up for the very hit or miss last series, which should have been the <i>last </i>series, but there is to be one more. Oh and one last thing - the episode was titled <i>Last Christmas</i> and I thought my so far successful avoidance of the Wham song was about to be destroyed less than four days before the finish line. However, it was Mistletoe and Wine that the predominant song, which in many ways is much worse...<p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">From Out of the Archives</span></i></b></p><p>Because of guests, we finished the week on something completely different - an episode of <b>Black Mirror </b>with Jesse Plemens in an homage to Star Trek. It was overlong and was essentially a rehash of the Jake Gyllenhaal film Source Code. It was okay, but everything I've seen of <b>Black Mirror</b> has made me wonder if Charlie Brooker knows where the critics' secrets are hidden.</p><p><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">Next Time...</span></b></p><p>Given that I came down with a virus on the 23rd, I expect the Christmas period will be spent watching a lot of stuff - not necessarily off the TV though. However, just to compound issues I have a frozen shoulder - right arm - so typing, lifting and wanking are all out of the window for however long it takes to sort out. Given this is a day late, I expect the next one will go live in 2024 so I hope anyone who reads this has a Happy Christmas and a braw auld New Year - let's hope it's better than 2023!</p><p><br /></p><p><br /></p><p><br /></p><p> </p>Phil Hallhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12680058800847509275noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5979663737404474935.post-44706103474997686082023-12-22T13:53:00.000+00:002023-12-22T13:53:48.579+00:00Television of the Year 2023<p>There has been some quite brilliant TV this year, so I decided to do a Top Ten...</p><p><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>10 - Extraordinary </b></span></p><p>I wasn't even going to watch it, yet somehow managed to and was very impressed with what didn't seem to be a particularly inspired idea of a woman who lives in a world where everyone has a superpower apart from her. It could have been a standalone series, but managed to plausibly ensure a season two. It was one of those rare beasts in the 2020s - a comedy that was funny. <b>Extraordinary</b> was an extraordinary series.</p><p><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>9 - Shrinking</b></span></p><p>Another comedy, this time with Jason Segal and Harrison Ford as psychiatrists who for one reason or another aren't very good at their jobs but also are but in unintentional ways. It's a fine ensemble cast dealing with loss, obsession and sexual tension. <b>Shrinking</b> did a fantastic job of showing how the people who psychoanalyse us have just as many hang-ups and foibles. It was from Apple TV, which should surprise no one.</p><p><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">8 - Barry</span></b></p><p>What started as a comedy, albeit a very black comedy, ended up being a distraught and bleak thriller. I don't know if it intended to end the way it did when it started back in 2018, but it came as a bit of a shock. It dispelled the myth that Henry Winkler is only the Fonz, as his Gene Cousineau was simply startling - a man who went from being an arsehole to being a complex, paranoid arsehole. Bill Hader was largely expressionless for most of the four series, which only added to the simple brilliance of his <b>Barry</b>. </p><p><span style="font-size: x-large;">7 - <b>The Change</b></span> </p><p>Bridget Christie's slightly surreal comedy about the menopause and female midlife crises seems to prove the theory that the best comedies turn up when governments and the wake of shite they leave are at their worst. So far this list looks like a list of the best comedies of 2023, but this was very good in a slightly otherworldly kind of way. <b>The Change</b> proved once and for all that comedy was back in fashion, even if there was an important point being made.</p><p><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>6 - Wolf Like Me</b></span></p><p>Oh look, another comedy, except this Australian series manages to take a very unfunny idea and make it quite brilliant - and funny. The second series of American widower with neurotic child meets a fellow American widow who also happens to be a werewolf was even better because we knew the characters now; it was like dropping in on old friends. This time there was a new baby to contend with and all the will it/won't it be a baby werewolf mystery. All was revealed in what was a really far-fetched finale, but to be fair, the entire concept of <b>Wolf Like Me </b>is a bit daft so you can excuse that.</p><p><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>5 - Loki</b></span></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgRp1At7hKCqSgvYrT2TkEqhUuV5BkuW-9M2zq4djCpFeEtriMFbcOGiXlVBAETFc1_tR5PUrk9VhPCR595GfnWznWkeTYUXEXDfj8WnBy_9h8tpXbRbubCVqsfsIN_2LJjrHA-rha-fV3dFNAOv6zbYgSfQm8gipGmR9_8sQY5tFoVYJYxax6DRTXIus4S" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="1087" data-original-width="1933" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgRp1At7hKCqSgvYrT2TkEqhUuV5BkuW-9M2zq4djCpFeEtriMFbcOGiXlVBAETFc1_tR5PUrk9VhPCR595GfnWznWkeTYUXEXDfj8WnBy_9h8tpXbRbubCVqsfsIN_2LJjrHA-rha-fV3dFNAOv6zbYgSfQm8gipGmR9_8sQY5tFoVYJYxax6DRTXIus4S" width="320" /></a></div>What if all Marvel TV and films could be this good? I know people were a little disappointed with a lot of the second season of <b>Loki</b> but I think they weren't watching it like an entire twelve-part story arc; even I missed this point at times. As a 'film' - albeit a very long one - this is possibly one of the best things the MCU has ever done and Loki's redemption arc was allowed to have a start, a middle and then an ending. It was a complete story and there won't be a third series. The finale was one of the best 45 minutes of television I've seen in many many years.<p></p><p><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">4 - Slow Horses</span></b></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgZtx9050YDVzpa36k1LAg8qbgBAoYIiABGQKrqsHPkcos0Ff7hq40E2yARXqwYm54-GCMO7d8vZbgpttqOidJlRjAODEcT3vLtfjG182PQvqyD_Jsm__PJCJGSlaLoc5GiqhNV9t6vveTozNCJhVMzxKe8O3ZjXXJ3w2rXypXo6uXrkrkIOLgZe_E20txx" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="750" data-original-width="1440" height="167" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgZtx9050YDVzpa36k1LAg8qbgBAoYIiABGQKrqsHPkcos0Ff7hq40E2yARXqwYm54-GCMO7d8vZbgpttqOidJlRjAODEcT3vLtfjG182PQvqyD_Jsm__PJCJGSlaLoc5GiqhNV9t6vveTozNCJhVMzxKe8O3ZjXXJ3w2rXypXo6uXrkrkIOLgZe_E20txx" width="320" /></a></div>I didn't even know this existed until about 12 weeks ago. Another almost faultless addition to Apple TV's spectacularly better than good output. This is a series about failed spies, condemned to spend their working lives in a shit hole office doing all the jobs that real spies wouldn't think of and lead by a man who loves his employees but treats them like scummy shit. The first two six-episode series of <b>Slow Horses</b> were proper in your face brilliance; none of this meandering around nonsense; no pfaffing about here, just good stories told exceedingly well and Gary Oldman continues to prove what an outstanding actor he is.<p></p><p><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">3 - For All Mankind</span></b></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEinfbJJeVkroB2yT4qjK8zV1k2Uiz9z8fSNMQ46BRtvvDZ8nq0525nA4SrQqOr6QT4rbXxRLFmkyCnKscN3xf0v3u3b2bN74KGv_YefGFwTVm3ui-Ac2zYEtVvA8HDmZ34oqWgURU2czWA-Ax1BhLKoHnHv7kt4N4P2R65-1EI-o5atjZ5GK6PQHcyaEmTG" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="1125" data-original-width="2000" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEinfbJJeVkroB2yT4qjK8zV1k2Uiz9z8fSNMQ46BRtvvDZ8nq0525nA4SrQqOr6QT4rbXxRLFmkyCnKscN3xf0v3u3b2bN74KGv_YefGFwTVm3ui-Ac2zYEtVvA8HDmZ34oqWgURU2czWA-Ax1BhLKoHnHv7kt4N4P2R65-1EI-o5atjZ5GK6PQHcyaEmTG" width="320" /></a></div>This alternate history Sci-Fi thriller has reached its fourth season and has been the most consistently excellent TV series over the last five years and if I'd done this before would have been at the top of my list almost every single time. It doesn't make it to the top this year because there have been two unbelievable series that were even better than this. <b>For All Mankind</b> is the story of what might have happened had the Russians/Soviet Union beaten the USA to the moon in 1969 and how that one event changed history in a number of ways. It's interesting because the series jumps about a decade every season and while that might seem to be an annoyance - what about all the things that happened in that decade? - it works perfectly. We're up to 2003 now and the world, from a technological standpoint is about the same as it is in 2023 but in many ways it's way ahead of us. people live on Mars, there's a hotel on the moon and we've had a gay female President of the USA, while the Soviet union still exists and North Korea is one of the richest countries on the planet. If you've never seen it, you should subscribe to Apple TV because it beats the shit out of other streaming services.<p></p><p><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">=1 - The Bear</span></b></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhcMy3URGSZ1BIKzb2_daoDWXjFguo2h_zQTuZJDs_ibqeZ1hSuz2epUS5UuaBeZJ2KxT9JWlcF7-5kE1mwnQ4gNa9cMUMYdoDsMg1RRIK-x_DhypcOWQ9UXDejtcmhVvG9wnQ15d6f_dN4u4KEHBnIE0dBa19x20r-tai9fkjBjTmyXja9vQoc1iLT6o3p" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="1000" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhcMy3URGSZ1BIKzb2_daoDWXjFguo2h_zQTuZJDs_ibqeZ1hSuz2epUS5UuaBeZJ2KxT9JWlcF7-5kE1mwnQ4gNa9cMUMYdoDsMg1RRIK-x_DhypcOWQ9UXDejtcmhVvG9wnQ15d6f_dN4u4KEHBnIE0dBa19x20r-tai9fkjBjTmyXja9vQoc1iLT6o3p" width="320" /></a></div>Jeremy Allen White is probably the best male actor working at the moment and his Carmy Berzotto is probably one of the best things to hit a TV screen in my life; but it's not about him, it's about this entire series and cast. A Michelin starred chef inherits a sandwich bar in Chicago from his drug-addled brother and goes about transforming it into a fabulous fine dining establishment while taking his rag tag bunch of kitchen wallas with him. It has some of the most outstanding single episodes I have ever seen on a TV screen; it boasts A list guest stars because if you're anyone in film and TV you want to be in this utterly stunning piece of TV. The first series of <b>The Bear </b>was unbelievable and blew everyone who watched it away; series two was even better. I'm not sure there has been a better ongoing TV series in my long life.<p></p><p><b style="font-size: xx-large;">=1 - Lessons in Chemistry</b></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEicatDKoUfQGkadG4GMGdYFoGYpTepEFmJKvk2Wao576gs-wewIkTMVEOprI376rz7mszhsH2nYaschSLdwk5Vtx-HfGsXxMlG5zYMAvjVoAP5puhUFJz3YJpUbpJbE3sLgxG5_wJ0gqqDPLP_hVVXmQaO85zNsBDbsdd3nf7aBRUY3Cc8aD9XMA8pysBLm" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="630" data-original-width="1200" height="168" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEicatDKoUfQGkadG4GMGdYFoGYpTepEFmJKvk2Wao576gs-wewIkTMVEOprI376rz7mszhsH2nYaschSLdwk5Vtx-HfGsXxMlG5zYMAvjVoAP5puhUFJz3YJpUbpJbE3sLgxG5_wJ0gqqDPLP_hVVXmQaO85zNsBDbsdd3nf7aBRUY3Cc8aD9XMA8pysBLm" width="320" /></a></div>Equal first because this is a one-off series and is possibly one of the most delightful things I have ever seen on a television. I personally have had a shit year, but in real terms my friends and family have had it even worse and considering I regard 2023 as possibly the worst in my 61 years you can imagine how bad it has been for those I care about. <b>Lessons in Chemistry</b> on the surface was about Brie Larson's struggle to make it in a man's world in the 1950s; how she overcame her OCDs and borderline autism to have a good life despite having a child out of wedlock, being a champion for black people and standing up for what she believed was right. The thing is, what it was really about was Calvin Evans, the man she loved, the father of her daughter and a man who tragically died in the third episode but never really left the series. He was one of the best TV creations I can remember in my life and his influence and presence was a beacon throughout this utterly brilliant TV show. There were eight episodes and it was another winner from Apple TV; if you ever get the chance to watch it, I expect it will have the same effect on you. This is without equal in terms of one-off shows and it might bring a tear or two to you eyes.<p></p>Phil Hallhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12680058800847509275noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5979663737404474935.post-59698686081080798512023-12-17T11:44:00.002+00:002023-12-19T12:46:23.727+00:002023 - Albums of the Year<p>Here are my albums of the year. 2023 has been a truly awful year for me, my family and my friends. It started with illness, continued with deaths and ended with an incurable disease for a wee bairn, but one thing has lifted my mood at times and that has been the amount of excellent new music I've thoroughly enjoyed this year.</p><p>There have been 15* 2023 albums that have graced my stereo or media player this year; some of them have been a bit meh, others - by artists who regularly featured in my Top 5 albums of yesteryear - have been a little disappointing (Motorpsycho, Steven Wilson, Carbon Based Lifeforms), but there have been six albums that have been on constant rotation throughout the year and all have claims - for one reason or another - to be my album of the year. </p><p>* One of the albums in my Top 6 was actually released in November 2022, but I didn't actually find out about it or buy it until the spring of 2023.</p><p><b><span style="font-size: large;">#6 - Sigur Ros - ATTA</span></b></p><p>When ATTA came out my first thoughts were, 'Oh a new Sigur Ros album' and then promptly forgot about it. When I decided to do a Top 5 albums of the year for the first time in ages, I decided that I should give the other 10 contenders a listen just in case one of them suddenly caught on fire and made me reconsider. ATTA is, IMHO, the best thing Sigur Ros has done in years. It is a beautiful and almost understated album that proves that a band that has been going for near on 30 years still has the ability to surprise and therefore I made my top 5 albums, my top 6 albums because this couldn't be missed out.</p><p><a href="https://youtu.be/JQVOCcEG-BA?si=ovF4kdLm2Dzxhv9Y">https://youtu.be/JQVOCcEG-BA?si=ovF4kdLm2Dzxhv9Y</a></p><p>***</p><p><b><span style="font-size: large;">#5 - M83 - Fantasy</span></b></p><p>This was very much a contender for the #1 spot until the summer/autumn arrived and four other albums came along and knocked it down the pecking order. Given that I didn't even buy the previous proper M83 album - Junk - this really came out of nowhere. In many ways it's the best album the band has ever released because with one exemption - the title track, which even that isn't bad - it's full of absolute cracking tunes. This is shoegaze meets dance music meets indie pop meets the quite unique sound of Anthony Gonzalez and it has the distinction of being my most played album of the year. That, however, is because shortly after this album came out I got back into music after a period of time where I listened to very little. In any ordinary year this would be #1.</p><p><a href="https://youtu.be/hrEQjbCgPoM?si=-8OlEMIQBnqDEfhP">https://youtu.be/hrEQjbCgPoM?si=-8OlEMIQBnqDEfhP</a></p><p>***</p><p><b><span style="font-size: large;">#4 - Solar Fields - Formations</span></b></p><p>Firstly this is an exception as it came out in November 2022, but I didn't get it until March as I had no idea it had come out. My top albums of the year wouldn't be complete without something from Scandinavia and Magnus Birgersson aka Solar Fields has produced some good albums over the last 15 years but nothing that has been this good. I remember six years ago when Carbon Based Lifeforms came out of nowhere and won my album of the year, Solar Fields - on the same label - had an album out that didn't even register on my radar. This year the roles are reversed with CBL just about limping into my top 10 but not enough to get more than this fleeting mention. This is an electronic album with a lot of 20th century influences and some absolutely banging tunes - Solar Fields are classed as Psybient (whatever that is), downtempo, progressive trance, and ambient, but I think there's elements of post rock and classic electronica. It's a cracking album however you want to label it.</p><p><a href="https://youtu.be/1K74lgNWZB8?si=F1zhfjYY4XRG82S1">https://youtu.be/1K74lgNWZB8?si=F1zhfjYY4XRG82S1</a></p><p>***</p><p><b><span style="font-size: large;">#3 - North Atlantic Oscillation - United Wire</span></b></p><p>Yes, you're seeing this correctly. My favourite band only manage to make it to #3 and it was a really tough decision because this really was a return to form after the slightly less than perfect Grind Show in 2018. I use the expression 'in any other year' a lot but it applies to this as well, it would have been #1. It came out of the blue, I wasn't expecting it and when it arrived I was blown away. It wandered back into Sam Healy's post-progressive rock roots without betraying the band's signature folktronica and played as a continuous piece of music it is truly outstanding. There is so much experimentation in NAO's music, if Cardiacs had more ideas in one song than most bands have in their entire careers, then this band are a close second. It is a classy addition to a fabulous discography and while I feel I have let my friend Sam down by not making it my #1 album of the year, it has been beaten by two truly awe-inspiring albums...</p><p><a href="https://youtu.be/mq7taGGKB70?si=zDjq-TNeiln41sw7">https://youtu.be/mq7taGGKB70?si=zDjq-TNeiln41sw7</a></p><p>***</p><p><b><span style="font-size: large;">#2 - Blur - The Ballad of Darren</span></b></p><p>What an absolute stonking album which would have won album of the year by a country (house) mile in any other year. In fact, I was listening to it as I typed this and I'm still blown away by how bloody brilliant every track is and how many influences you can hear - from David Bowie to the Velvets to Nikki Sudden to the indie music I grew up with. It's just an album that surpasses superlatives, it's like they've been working up to this all their careers and every single track is outstanding - even the three extras on the Japanese edition would not have seemed out of place had they been put on the standard UK and US releases. I'd list the tracks to listen to but that would essentially be the entire album, so if you haven't heard this go and buy it, you won't be disappointed, it's pretty much a work of genius. </p><p><a href="https://youtu.be/6tyqxmIxIH4?si=hKzFkoAcZVkzf3r2">https://youtu.be/6tyqxmIxIH4?si=hKzFkoAcZVkzf3r2</a></p><p>***</p><p>What could possibly beat the Blur album to the top accolade? What work of pure unadulterated joy and spectacle could possibly beat that - an album that in many ways could have been one of the albums of the century? Well... this came along at a really good time; after a year of ill health both physical and mental I was just coming out of a tunnel I really didn't think I'd get through at points, which is why I've been so overwhelmed by the utterly wonderful albums that have graced my stereo in 2023. This album can be described as choral psychedelic folk music and is full of wonderfully Scottish tunes that absolutely floored me when I first heard them and continue to do so a few months later. Despite all the brilliance of music in 2023 nothing has brought me to tears the way this has at times and in many ways this little outfit with their small following, limited number of gigs and views on You Tube, that make North Atlantic Oscillation seems like a supergroup, have surpassed all my expectations. Three years ago they released an album called The Lagganberry Man which would have won my best album of 2020 if I'd bothered to do a best albums list and this is my favourite album of 2023; not because it's musically better than the Blur album or technically better than the NAO album, because from an emotional point of view I heard nothing else this year that had such a profound effect on me - everything about it had meaning.</p><p>Therefore, my Album of the Year is this: </p><p><b><span style="font-size: large;">Beluga Lagoon - The Kilfraggan Forest Choir </span></b></p><p>Here's the entire album: <a href="https://youtu.be/6qoUt7qfGbU?si=ReqR9mPDwCa2ggRt">https://youtu.be/6qoUt7qfGbU?si=ReqR9mPDwCa2ggRt</a></p><p><br /></p>Phil Hallhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12680058800847509275noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5979663737404474935.post-24909973887772425192023-12-16T11:39:00.000+00:002023-12-16T11:39:50.057+00:00Modern Culture - The Ends of Some Worlds<p><i>Spoilery nonsense throughout - don't read things if you haven't seen them, already!</i></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">World's End</span></i></b></p><p>While the wife found <b>Leave the World Behind</b> a little long and tedious, I found it to be a remarkably profound film about the end of the world because it was more like how I would expect it to happen.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEh03sRLNc30WPKuFsZgTreD_S-mLin21QHcIT6mHOnSSWds4cVKoyjHH5jHZETR-htttIt4LLwa5QbkUsOtAcO_XIYP4Hu4s6LLr8OQz46eDkurPWVtsFffSsWJmLPWf6o-E_0vs7Nw60G7PibX_-B8JPRSQhpMisDXdiBFdIlGCLyRrmRgEHygYm1LFKpk" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="450" data-original-width="800" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEh03sRLNc30WPKuFsZgTreD_S-mLin21QHcIT6mHOnSSWds4cVKoyjHH5jHZETR-htttIt4LLwa5QbkUsOtAcO_XIYP4Hu4s6LLr8OQz46eDkurPWVtsFffSsWJmLPWf6o-E_0vs7Nw60G7PibX_-B8JPRSQhpMisDXdiBFdIlGCLyRrmRgEHygYm1LFKpk" width="320" /></a></div>It was a little like something M Night Shyamalan would make, but it was actually a Sam (Mr Robot) Esmail film and any semblance to the director of the Sixth Sense and other oddities was probably down to the presence of the deer and flamingos, which provided an interesting diversion from what was probably happening. It was a film quite heavy on the 'symbolic' and a tad overwrought, but I would expect that in an end of the world story. However, it starts off really as a class thing, with different degrees of snobbery at play, some racism and a few stereotypes being trodden on as that specific rule book is ripped up. Julia Roberts, Ethan Hawke and their two children are well off middle class Americans who decide to take an impromptu break on the North Carolina coastline away from the hustle of New York. They book a pretty fantastic rural hideaway and settle back to a relaxing few days away, that is until all their electronic devices stop working and the TV just transmits an emergency signal.<p></p><p>Then Mahershala Ali and Myha'la Herrold turn up - the home's owner and his daughter - and it starts to get a little weird. For starters, Julia Roberts' character can't seem to believe that a black family could have something so splendiferous and her unconscious racism barrels its way to the surface. Then the deer start congregating in the garden and the tone becomes more paranoid and desperate. From that point on quite a bit happens but in a slow and slightly incongruous way; relationships thaw and it starts to get even weirder. You - the viewer - has as much idea what is going on as the actors and as I said, as the film moves from phase to phase you can really start to see how if this was the end of the world that it would be more of a whimper than a bang. It also highlights just how dependent we are on the digital and our electronics; it also points out how nasty individuals can become when faced with the unknown and while it's an American film, I think this time around it would apply to just about any country and its people. It's a reasonably good film and probably gets its low rating on IMDB because most Americans who will have reviewed it will have missed the point. It was a much better way to start the week's viewing than I've been accustomed to recently.<br /></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Whos Who</span></i></b></p><p>I think the final <b>Doctor Who</b> 60th Anniversary special was probably one of the best episodes I've seen in a long time, even if I'm really not sure what happened or why it happened. What I do think is that when David Tennant walked away from the role years ago, he didn't really want to and this time he didn't have to. We have an interesting subplot in the world of the Doctor now, so stop reading this if you haven't seen it...</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjfq94AXCays_8jFrR43G_XplKp_BRyeV70Xm8iWdAS1wovnlFsRMxrpbE4uvnOgxSYNjMYR0Fh1GMIhm69uzaII_IoBkDZ0lgzI0lYdqIofaHPrOSUf6Ni4nmZbXOnQi9StCV8Py5192SINyD5s9mGHUJ5wPgTDdGvpGTeKMYqfWQhO4jhYQZNB7s51zbq" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="506" data-original-width="900" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjfq94AXCays_8jFrR43G_XplKp_BRyeV70Xm8iWdAS1wovnlFsRMxrpbE4uvnOgxSYNjMYR0Fh1GMIhm69uzaII_IoBkDZ0lgzI0lYdqIofaHPrOSUf6Ni4nmZbXOnQi9StCV8Py5192SINyD5s9mGHUJ5wPgTDdGvpGTeKMYqfWQhO4jhYQZNB7s51zbq" width="320" /></a></div></div>Neil Patrick Harris was one of the best villains we've seen on this show for a long time, the Toymaker was a genuinely scary and quite excellent powerful villain, even if some of the set pieces left a little to be desired. In fact the lead-up to the big finale was both ridiculously paced and again quite scary - I can imagine kids will have found some of the imagery in it disturbing and I liked the way that it all linked back to Logie-Baird's first ever television transmission in 1925. There is a genuine feel of watching behind the sofa again.<p></p><p>Something else that was really good was Catherine Tate's Donna Noble in these three specials; she was proper kick arse and very good with it; like she'd been let off of her leash and was finally allowed to be something more than just comedy Catherine Tate; it was also good to see Kate Lethbridge-Stewart and Melanie (Bonnie Langford) back in the show; in fact the entire premise of the Toymaker having programmed a signal into the television in 1925 to come into affect nearly a century later and give humans too much freewill and the belief they are right about whatever they feel they're right about was very zeitgeist-y and topical; even the set-up to bring NCuti Gatwa into the show was quite ingenious, it's what followed that has stumped me and I'm sure many Whovians are probably going 'What the f...' as I type this.</p><p>So we now have two Doctors and David Tennant gets to remain as one of them and obviously opens up grand possibilities in the future. Whether you can believe that his incarnation loved Donna Noble the best, especially given the relationship he had with Rose and the fact there's another one of him, in another reality with Rose, but I don't watch this show to get mired in the minutiae of Whovian bollocks, I watch it to be entertained and tonight I was. I'm not sure about this new Doctor though...<br /></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">The Grass Man</span></i></b></p><p>The wife and I were discussing the fact that there have been very few things we have seen Matthew McConaughey or Colin Farrell in that we haven't enjoyed, so when a film came along with both of them in it but was directed by Guy Ritchie there was a chance that record might be spoiled. The thing is, while we're not huge fans of Ritchie's work, he doesn't make bad films, so we were rather relieved and delighted that <b>The Gentlemen</b> was so enjoyable. What neither of us could understand was how this film has been out for four years and we've only just found out about it. I mean, my film knowledge, even films I haven't seen, is usually quite encyclopaedic but this went under the radar.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEh-BkeBDKwqM0b6n8DrKEbr_5I9TyAKKq06vI2GKwXMp-dowTeeUM1P6BzOfE04C8pX05H_DbLdA7AT5KMTmho4YyOaRzRlKJ2LCbb7Sij3bACAPM7Za21xeL4XkQJbg7RmuxKAkpfT9q6DxTBIjgaT2vZkqqPeYxQVPSdM9MendoBuc34n1IQLXMnk0zZh" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="1080" data-original-width="1920" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEh-BkeBDKwqM0b6n8DrKEbr_5I9TyAKKq06vI2GKwXMp-dowTeeUM1P6BzOfE04C8pX05H_DbLdA7AT5KMTmho4YyOaRzRlKJ2LCbb7Sij3bACAPM7Za21xeL4XkQJbg7RmuxKAkpfT9q6DxTBIjgaT2vZkqqPeYxQVPSdM9MendoBuc34n1IQLXMnk0zZh" width="320" /></a></div>This is a movie about a drug dealer - a very powerful and rich drug dealer with a bunch of aristocrats and powerful men on his side, hence the title, but that's a bit of a red herring because this movie was about power struggles and protecting what is yours. The all-star cast do a grand job in telling a story that really has you guessing because it starts with what appears to be almost the end of the tale and then works back to how the start came about. Involved as well as the two aforementioned screen greats are also Charlie Hunnam, Michelle Dockery, Hugh Grant, Eddie Marsan, Jeremy Strong and Sam West in a violent, twisty comedy drama about a man who has created a Β£billion weed empire that he wants to sell and the people trying to fuck each other (and him) over to obtain it. That's about it, but it's told in a clever way because Hugh Grant plays a sleazy paparazzi journo who thinks he's got the scoop on everything so is trying to con Β£20m from the weed dealer to stop his story from going public and the majority of the film is him explaining to the weed dealer's #2 what has unfolded. <p></p><p>If you haven't seen it then try to track it down, it's worth nearly two hours of your time. Everyone in it turns in top notch performances and it will literally have you guessing until the final moments and in a film with some excellent set-ups, it's worth watching for the one in a cafΓ© where Farrell deals with four young wankers in a most humiliating and brilliant way. Top film and another one for the positive column - the week is starting well. </p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Out of Sight</span></i></b></p><p>It might be eight years since this came out but talking about it without spoilers is going to be a tough one and I don't want to spoil it because while it might be eight years old it's a little seen movie that is worth watching, especially if you're a fan of <b>Stranger Things</b>, because <b>Hidden</b> is a film by the Duffer Brothers and it's less than 80 minutes long - so it won't even eat into too much of your evening.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEispz4i3rVy0O26d-tOhneFxTnB7z_aDEO3REZjDB0fvAhFsdh2FH1ELD7aJftQAfek9bpg9vMAEtgBrlvHYOIc_g7uq9-t8c5cxPV2iYuX1q50xBorg4cHMdvnbBpW9GFQBvCQx3GuvzfxmBqfBcbBzzXIvMMPcN2kxCG1HpP3V_airOEldI_qWwBrxqjU" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="675" data-original-width="1200" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEispz4i3rVy0O26d-tOhneFxTnB7z_aDEO3REZjDB0fvAhFsdh2FH1ELD7aJftQAfek9bpg9vMAEtgBrlvHYOIc_g7uq9-t8c5cxPV2iYuX1q50xBorg4cHMdvnbBpW9GFQBvCQx3GuvzfxmBqfBcbBzzXIvMMPcN2kxCG1HpP3V_airOEldI_qWwBrxqjU" width="320" /></a></div>This is a truly dark movie - both visually and in terms of the story. A husband, his wife and their daughter live in an underground shelter away from the 'Breathers' who are hunting them, but they have managed to evade their pursuers for over 300 days. The bunker is grim and grimy, it has a rat which is stealing their food and they're running out of options. The daughter is growing tired and restless and the parents are doing everything in their power to keep her from going batshit crazy and all the while they have to be quiet and not draw any attention to themselves. It's a truly dark and twisted story that is, at times, really scary but also almost a bit boring. Like <b>Leave the World Behind</b> the end of the world is a boring place, unless you don't know what's after you and why they're so relentless at it.<p></p><p>We do know there was a virus and we get glimpses of life before the shelter in flashbacks. Alexander SkarsgΓ₯rd and Andrea Risborough are excellent as the parents running out of food, time and ideas, Emily Alyn Lind is their daughter who pretty much grates on you from the moment the film starts and that's all I'm going to say about it because if you haven't seen it, you should give it a go. Anything else would give too much away and I get the feeling that even by saying what I've said I might be spoiling it for someone because whoever watches it now is maybe going to expect something unexpected or out of left field. </p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">The Colour in the (Man) Things</span></i></b></p><p>Because <b>Hidden</b> finished so early, we caught up with the second quarter-final of <b>Only Connect</b> and still had an hour to kill, so I suggested we watch the recently released colourised version of Marvel's <b>Werewolf By Night</b>, especially as there's going to be so little Marvel content over the next year or so.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgHW_c-jKjGYpO7l_QirlJZ-bn6ZBhG0pKjYldtDY7_RuxP525c7cPTLblYL2Mp6fq8qjGIhj2K9XQP5F4sr3mJLCSRSlehCNfBGD1Akek9vC8RRQxSXiCNp-YNZ0WZaFukMM3uWivVDDJXFVSN5WbXkZNMtdkN8_oA5OV97Be_zIlyFhSjWNw4au5jZNpO" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="450" data-original-width="800" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgHW_c-jKjGYpO7l_QirlJZ-bn6ZBhG0pKjYldtDY7_RuxP525c7cPTLblYL2Mp6fq8qjGIhj2K9XQP5F4sr3mJLCSRSlehCNfBGD1Akek9vC8RRQxSXiCNp-YNZ0WZaFukMM3uWivVDDJXFVSN5WbXkZNMtdkN8_oA5OV97Be_zIlyFhSjWNw4au5jZNpO" width="320" /></a></div>I really enjoyed this first time around, but it seemed much grimmer and violent when it was in black and white; this new look version seemed to have more humour in it and less haunting graphics. Gabriel Garcia Bernal is still a strange choice to play Jack Russell, but he does it interestingly, with a take that isn't teenage wolf boy that the comics had in the 1970. Laura Donnelly as Elsa Bloodstone is still bloody excellent; she was great in <b>The Nevers</b> and apparently was sexy and spunky in the eight episodes of <b>Outlander</b> and six episodes of <b>Britannia </b>she was in - she's not in enough stuff. Harriet Sansom Harris as Elsa's wicked stepmother is also great, she was most recently in <b>Jules</b>, the charming film about an alien who landed in Ben Kingsley's backyard.<p></p><p><b>Werewolf By Night</b> is essentially a play on <b>The Most Dangerous Game</b>, with a group of hunters fighting each other to find the monster who has the Bloodstone stuck to his back. The monster just happens to be one of my favourite Marvel characters of all time - The Man-Thing (and he really is giant-sized in this), who, like Jack, has been reinvented for the 21st century. Jack helps Elsa find Ted (Man-Thing's alter-ego's name), gets the Bloodstone, but because he himself is a monster he gets captured along with Elsa and... well, contrived story or not it's all nicely wrapped up inside 45 minutes with the heroes winning and the villains in various pieces or burned to a crisp. It is a fine little Marvel show, which was originally going to be the first part of a series of stuff leading to a Legion of Monsters feature, but that got shelved for various reasons, not least the fact Marvel has become a bit of a dirty word in the last couple of years for many reasons we've gone into in these pages. Suffice to say, if you haven't seen <b>Werewolf By Night</b>, I'd urge you to watch the black and white version because it feels better and creepier; the colourised version seemed to lose some of its atmosphere and the werewolf wasn't anywhere near as good in colour.</p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Bollocks at the End of My Tether</span></i></b><br /></p><p>I know I've used variations of the following analogy a few times, but <b>A Murder at the End of the World </b>is like unsatisfying sex without an orgasm. This insipid nonsense continues to crawl to its conclusion - We have one more week of this bullshit to go. However, this week, the thing we've essentially been waiting for was revealed: the silver serial killer resolution and how that all culminated... yet even that was like having a slow cold wank for 45 minutes and then stopping pre-orgasm to read a bad book. </p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhzomhLAuueEraH3-diWnlTrrx2sDKA4p7r-RUEMt9Khjft-iBxRLnWVkBGZvBjhKrDcXaebKeaLisgX8qw74kjkjeX9qVPKsjHzpZoAhDVMJ5hrEonwtnPMf8gB-DkNQMH8zmepPuWzsW6Wa9FwEtxdQOKiRp5yt8pTnwvF4ixQLSGmSlxoh0aqvtnMuuu" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="266" data-original-width="474" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhzomhLAuueEraH3-diWnlTrrx2sDKA4p7r-RUEMt9Khjft-iBxRLnWVkBGZvBjhKrDcXaebKeaLisgX8qw74kjkjeX9qVPKsjHzpZoAhDVMJ5hrEonwtnPMf8gB-DkNQMH8zmepPuWzsW6Wa9FwEtxdQOKiRp5yt8pTnwvF4ixQLSGmSlxoh0aqvtnMuuu" width="320" /></a></div>We found out who he was, but we didn't see him, we just saw that he blew his own brains out and somehow all of this was a clue to solving the mystery in Iceland, which it appears has been explained away and Clive Owen is probably going to be the baddie all along, probably with the aid of his AI. It appears he's a nasty control freak and because he's a billionaire he can get away with what he likes and have whoever he wants killed off, beaten up or whatever. Fortunately this penultimate episode was only 44 minutes long, so that was a blessed relief. I just can't believe that it's going to be this straightforward because if it is then Brit Marling and Zal Batmanglij must never be allowed near a TV or film studio ever again. There has to be a twist in the finale otherwise anyone who's watched this heap of shite - which feels like it was scripted by a horny 14 year old - will want these twats' heads on a pike.<p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Alien versus Vikings</span></i></b></p><p>Despite some dodgy acting, <b>Outlander</b> a film made in 2008, was a surprisingly enjoyable load of nonsense. Starring Jim Caviezel, Sophie Myles, John Hurt, Jack Huston and Ron Perlman, it was about an alien - Caviezel - who crash lands on earth - presumably Norway, but possibly Scotland and on board his spaceship is not only his dead relatives but also a deadly Morwen, a creature that is almost impossible to kill - at least for the limited technology available to Vikings.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEi2TZSSsnGdC62Y9450PPJrVpdmMNivIG9i3PZ0wBjiVaYMW8X5YsZm-Zx7hO6LxwQTTpeo27J5NYJArG0wBBeLKhIWRMMojHQXIgjG_3RwecCgeEA94O3BvnPkn3GlZjSCEAAAPq-q4p8cOaWREmoxeYyHEktBY-tLSjbWzkQxKWORi7xJ1ie_ennx3x0V" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="734" data-original-width="1300" height="181" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEi2TZSSsnGdC62Y9450PPJrVpdmMNivIG9i3PZ0wBjiVaYMW8X5YsZm-Zx7hO6LxwQTTpeo27J5NYJArG0wBBeLKhIWRMMojHQXIgjG_3RwecCgeEA94O3BvnPkn3GlZjSCEAAAPq-q4p8cOaWREmoxeYyHEktBY-tLSjbWzkQxKWORi7xJ1ie_ennx3x0V" width="320" /></a></div></div>The thing that sets this apart from a dodgy film is the excellent special effects - the alien creature is quite fantastic and also one of the scariest since Giger invented Alien and even the story, complete with backstory is actually quite inventive. What lets the movie down is the, at times, wooden acting and slightly stilted script and Jack Huston is more suited to playing a trendy London swinger than a Viking - he simply can't carry it off and is a tiny bit too camp for the part. Caviezel growls his way through this and was a surprising bit of casting given he makes very unusual films - such as Mel Gibson's Jesus of Nazareth film, which of course was all in Aramaic. <p></p><p>The alien hero is captured by the Vikings who believe he was responsible for the destruction of a rival village, but it soon becomes clear that something else is terrorising the area; he eventually wins his captors' trust and they go about tracking down the alien monster and trying to kill it, but they simply don't have the right tools, which means Kanaan - the alien human - raids his sunken ship for metal to fashion into weapons that can penetrate the monster's thick skin. There's a hint of a love story, a lot of larger than life characters basically there as monster food but it has a cracking pace and as I said to the wife, 'sometimes dodgy films can be enjoyable hokum' and this certainly filled that description.<br /></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Angel Station</span></i></b></p><p>I decided I wanted to watch some films from much longer ago than usual - not that long but from an era that tends to be forgotten; the 1990s. This was a strange decade, it was just as special effects were becoming digitalised but most films were still relying on actual man-made effects. Then of course there was the fact that films seemed to still be channelling the 1980s in terms of fashion and look; arguably the 90s was a 'better' era but it still stunk out the cinemas quite a bit. However, there was the beginnings of a renaissance - Spielberg was still making great films, Tarantino had come along and we were on the cusp of a new era of great films including a new generation of women directors - Kathryn Bigelow, Jane Campion and Nora Ephron.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiurIU3dW6NweioacBBAKOZR5p_TSOe5_2obdDFf68zm0tE0rIEzTYBAq5c1FIizcNUqQ5O2SEcA2cVslsSKDpZJjMs6BhC-fT8Lqdj5cvMgoqQ_Pjgkc1tkKpWOKjCcuFCiBDqugTnvhZ6ay8dQgGqV4CUqJunsEAd7i3W6aBNPTTWqOpsdjll-AZRbzeQ" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="567" data-original-width="850" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiurIU3dW6NweioacBBAKOZR5p_TSOe5_2obdDFf68zm0tE0rIEzTYBAq5c1FIizcNUqQ5O2SEcA2cVslsSKDpZJjMs6BhC-fT8Lqdj5cvMgoqQ_Pjgkc1tkKpWOKjCcuFCiBDqugTnvhZ6ay8dQgGqV4CUqJunsEAd7i3W6aBNPTTWqOpsdjll-AZRbzeQ" width="320" /></a></div>It was an Ephron film that I wanted to watch as it had been 28 years since we last watched <b>Michael</b> and I remembered it was a movie I really enjoyed. Watching it again, I totally get why I thought that even if it now seems a little of another time. John Travolta is the eponymous Michael, an angel who just happens to be living in a motel in Iowa. He's a bum; he smokes, drinks, has a beer gut and apart from the wings doesn't really look like an angel at all; but that's really the entire point of the start of this. You see while Michael is the focal point of this feature, the movie is really about William Hurt and Andie McDowell, because Michael is essentially setting these two up for each other; it appears to be his last responsibility before he returns to heaven and is no longer able to set foot on earth.<p></p><p>Hurt, McDowell and Robert Pastorelli work for a weekly 'newspaper' a little like the National Enquirer and they're following up on a lead about an angel living in a motel, so they travel to Iowa and pretty much meet the archangel Michael straight away - it's a little more complicated than that, but that's all you need to know. What follows is a road trip across the USA, the three reporters, the angel and the dog - which is really the lynch pin for the entire film because it's the dog who is the popular one. As this group of disparate individuals and their angel work their way through the Mid West it soon becomes obvious that they are dealing with an actual angel, but that never seems to be an issue because these reporters are too wrapped up in their own worlds to let it even bother them. It is a very funny film at times and as it is essentially a fantasy it belies the poor - 5.7 - rating it has on IMDB, which I find a bit of an insult to what is essentially a feelgood film. Yes, it's a dreadful 1990s film, but Travolta - fresh from Pulp Fiction - is great and he carries what is essentially a love story that has dated because attitudes are different now. I'm glad we watched it again, especially as we have another Travolta film lined up for later on, another mid-90s film he made while he was having his second wind as a A list actor.</p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Double Trouble</span></i></b></p><p>Despite having films and some TV series we haven't seen yet sitting on the Flash Drive of Doom, we decided to start watching <b>The Outsider</b> again, mainly because I enjoyed reading the book so much in the summer and because not only is it one of the best books Stephen King has written in the last 25 years, but it's also an excellent TV series, which expands on the book and treats us to another version of Holly Gibney (first seen on TV in <b>Mr Mercedes</b>).</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhamrAicimPnH4GN-rLK6bTCzZPHZ6APBViAefDx3knAYM-nprFR64f6pVYbyfdqI485XY9voSbxxehCvvdfZ-lfJXdoSX9LQLCVuwplC06vjv2L0oTb-U3Bt0cNQsloak9y9Jk4F3ymaL1TtndMbyc5Ho5QiWn-BIpD_-R5nYJv6JFfS1LafwgDmo6A_tS" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="1511" data-original-width="2048" height="236" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhamrAicimPnH4GN-rLK6bTCzZPHZ6APBViAefDx3knAYM-nprFR64f6pVYbyfdqI485XY9voSbxxehCvvdfZ-lfJXdoSX9LQLCVuwplC06vjv2L0oTb-U3Bt0cNQsloak9y9Jk4F3ymaL1TtndMbyc5Ho5QiWn-BIpD_-R5nYJv6JFfS1LafwgDmo6A_tS" width="320" /></a></div>While it's unlikely we'll watch all ten parts this week, I don't need to give you a running commentary over the next couple of blogs. This is a cracking TV mystery series about the brutal murder of a child by, what appears to be, the coach of the town's little league baseball team, except it soon becomes clear that if he did kill the kid he was able to be in two places at the same time.<p></p><p>Jason Bateman plays Terry Maitland, the man accused of the heinous crime and Ben Mendelsohn plays Ralph Anderson, the town's sheriff who watches his 100% guaranteed case start to fall apart within hours of the arrest of Maitland and what happens after this and the utter chaos and despair caused by the murder and the consequences after it. This is a supernatural story told in a police procedural way and it is quite brilliant; maybe not as good as the book, but still it's top notch TV. The ten episodes follow the investigation as it become clear that while Maitland didn't kill the kids, he also must have as his prints, DNA and likeness is everywhere, until gradually you realise and the people investigating that something not right is happening. It's on HBO, it isn't your average supernatural TV series and if you haven't seen it you really should, it is just one gut punch after another all the way through as the main cast wrestle with the impossible. It was one of the highlights of 2020, which is why we're watching it again.</p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">V is for...</span></i></b></p><p>A little comic book anecdote of sorts. I first met David Lloyd - the artist - back in the 1990s when I worked at Comics International. I wouldn't say we became firm friends, but we knew each other well enough to have good conversations whenever we'd meet. When I was doing Borderline Press, we got talking about possibly publishing in print form some of the strips that were featuring in his on-line comic and while nothing came of that, we're still friends and we still wish each other birthday and Christmas greetings every year. Considering I have much closer friends in comics, very few of them are as consistent as my relationship with David.</p><p>I have never read V for Vendetta. In fact my never having read it was one of the reasons I think we became casual friends, as he'd never met anyone in comics who hadn't read it and the fact I was such a prominent figure for a few years, with an apparent encyclopaedic knowledge of the genre, made this even stranger. Like chatting to Stan Lee's #2 Roy Thomas in Tarzana (home of Edgar Rice Burroughs) about guinea pigs, it's something the other person is prone to remember. So as I've never read V for Vendetta, I've never seen <b>V for Vendetta</b>, it is a film that has never really been of interest to me - as strange as that might seem, but by the time it was made I had already started to form a negative opinion of its original writer Alan Moore - something I had always resisted for convoluted political reasons. However, by 2005 I had come to the conclusion that Moore and my (and Moore's) previous employer Dez Skinn were as bad as each other (another convoluted story) and both suffered from much more than just ego problems. So you might think that if Alan Moore refused to have his name attached to the film it would make me want to watch it, but I'd never been interested in the source material so it just never happened - a kind of paradox.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEh8ctKUTvwVh5nNe548Xsyx6GL-bkhi5rIgMrDHj7i59WkRWFkuxfDt_--fPoJNiMh-dTF-DLaUxU5vRHvyQp9yo9iEns9W0LbsKynkyZgpVIpH4IltvmAUsyAZcWT1h8hBQ5fbjE1AdRTk6EEClNf5JLKif-1PjXbQYLoQHYZ2fW_AVw39kP-d7M5BApXs" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="1376" data-original-width="2100" height="210" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEh8ctKUTvwVh5nNe548Xsyx6GL-bkhi5rIgMrDHj7i59WkRWFkuxfDt_--fPoJNiMh-dTF-DLaUxU5vRHvyQp9yo9iEns9W0LbsKynkyZgpVIpH4IltvmAUsyAZcWT1h8hBQ5fbjE1AdRTk6EEClNf5JLKif-1PjXbQYLoQHYZ2fW_AVw39kP-d7M5BApXs" width="320" /></a></div>After 18 years, we rectified that this week, but it was more to do with the 8.2 rating it has on IMDB rather than anything else. It is literally the last movie in a long list of top rated films we'd never bothered to watch. <p></p><p>It is a uniquely prophetic feature, depicting the UK - or England - in a way that might have seemed scary in the 1980s when it was written or in 2005 when the film was made, but now seems almost like it could be a training manual for the far right or something a lot of sitting Conservative MPs would consider as good propaganda. Natalie Portman plays Evie, the daughter of 'activists' who unintentionally gets marked by the fascist regime in control of the country when she breaks curfew to visit a colleague, but is also rescued by a mysterious 'hero' simply called V - played in voice, at least, by Hugo Weaving, when she falls foul of some 'police' type wankers. </p><p>It is largely about a year of revenge and retribution, setting in motion an attempt to mobilise the people of the country against the fascists running it, led by John Hurt, with a subplot involving the police, led by Stephen Rea and his assistant played by Rupert Graves, who are charged with apprehending V but become embroiled in the killings of prominent party members and the reasons behind their deaths. In many ways it's a clever, almost labyrinthine story that is probably let down by the overall Britishness of it. It might have been made in 2005, but it kind of feels like it was made when the original comic came out, the early 1980s. There's also elements in it that felt contrived and don't stand up to much scrutiny - such as Evie's imprisonment and the 'people' she meets there.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgutuiaEAirBiR-3NKfka7QBP-4NrajsIJK6vZUxUTmJ1XgoJu4hU05OsVZMZ9-U9djQKVGwCUsHHXksSE2Bm_wO1cYul7LO_X4CB-_CRiJCKAWkr2PMXwyfDSZ5U4G-cZ1buG1YKd7DIjf8QJwpfWOOZCrnBLicgef3WPHH4cJ7iiuNRrRVl7IElNf8Cy-" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="628" data-original-width="960" height="209" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgutuiaEAirBiR-3NKfka7QBP-4NrajsIJK6vZUxUTmJ1XgoJu4hU05OsVZMZ9-U9djQKVGwCUsHHXksSE2Bm_wO1cYul7LO_X4CB-_CRiJCKAWkr2PMXwyfDSZ5U4G-cZ1buG1YKd7DIjf8QJwpfWOOZCrnBLicgef3WPHH4cJ7iiuNRrRVl7IElNf8Cy-" width="320" /></a></div>While it is a good and compelling 'superhero' film there is something about it that simply doesn't feel like a film; there's this mini-series stitched together vibe or even a stage play and while it's a little over two hours, it felt heavily edited and in need of a bit more fleshing out, especially some of the peripheral characters and even the leads. It also feels a bit dated despite the very modern premise. I struggled with Weaving's voice, which does sound like it's kind of behind a mask but is far too clear, precise and BBC to really convey the kind of menace he's supposed to have, but then again I'm not sure what kind of voice he should have had. The bottom line is I enjoyed it, but I don't see why it has such a high rating nor was impressed enough to feel like recommending it to anyone who hasn't seen it, thus probably opening myself up to more criticism from the people who have a problem with me for thinking Alan Moore is a vaguely talented plagiarist - but hey, these reviews aren't designed to win friends, just influence some people...<p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">The Big Guy is Back</span></i></b></p><p>Finally <b>Monarch: Legacy of Monsters</b> delivered a better than average episode, but the younger cast members really aren't all that engaging at all. Well, maybe Kentaro has something going for him but Kate and May seem to switch back and forth as to who is the whiniest and most contrary. To be fair, whenever Kate starts getting contrary something interesting happens and this week it was the return of the big guy - Godzilla.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhHnOTXUaYM7T-fRdSMbKinpwOEhZGYKz4qsTRUC9yOxVbSXrrF8dgV5LRonOIpOtI7IwjFpa95YdpJVJ4uIYFoHFSovAvt1Pc1y86qQKBmtfyOUsUoeZf7Gp6eDvgNIlX75wkdcngzJyYL489VGanWeCuDQw7cMSR5HyGclpZHJ_hvLTkfutjGUu4gaevx" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="675" data-original-width="1200" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhHnOTXUaYM7T-fRdSMbKinpwOEhZGYKz4qsTRUC9yOxVbSXrrF8dgV5LRonOIpOtI7IwjFpa95YdpJVJ4uIYFoHFSovAvt1Pc1y86qQKBmtfyOUsUoeZf7Gp6eDvgNIlX75wkdcngzJyYL489VGanWeCuDQw7cMSR5HyGclpZHJ_hvLTkfutjGUu4gaevx" width="320" /></a></div>However, how he got to northern Africa when he was last seen swimming out into the Pacific ocean is anyone's guess or why he was buried under a lot of earth, rocks and sand is another - unless of course there's more than one of him, which we know there isn't. But this episode moved along at a blistering pace and crossed two time lines - back in the 50s we found out why Lee Shaw lost control of Monarch and probably began his decline from leader to zero and how he lost the love of Keiko (or did he?). The baby Monarch team meet Dr Suzuki who has invented a way of summoning titans and in 2015 the gang finally see their dad again as he uses a similar device to call on Godzilla. We also learn what Shaw has planned, which rather surprises the youngsters. At least it's moving in the right direction again after a couple of weeks of flip flopping around going nowhere.<p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Luke Cage meets the Devil</span></i></b></p><p>The difference between <b>SurrealEstate </b>and <b>Evil</b> - a CBS All Access show - is the latter actually felt like it was made by a TV production company and was written by someone that understood the English language. They are, however, largely similar shows. Mike Colter played Luke Cage in the two Netflix Marvel series and a Defenders spin-off, and in this he leads a team of people debunking or proving the existence of possession and biblical evil - a kind of X Files meets the Exorcist.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgM7GUHRZ-lk5RP-CC-Zw19J19fOKz5zqeCLgLNpYDyeg9mN8anZFvcw9Z1rVgLRsgb6DU6Cy_wfakBP9hwR6kC_FIDhomPYHT_-0eXR3bNLBDmgQg1dNiwQdGXxiiwtNYif2OPKOS2mmIJmRJCSoCiIHD5ZksJMf6YlL7OFDodB1Vk5xW5BPNTdFA-29Qr" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="316" data-original-width="474" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgM7GUHRZ-lk5RP-CC-Zw19J19fOKz5zqeCLgLNpYDyeg9mN8anZFvcw9Z1rVgLRsgb6DU6Cy_wfakBP9hwR6kC_FIDhomPYHT_-0eXR3bNLBDmgQg1dNiwQdGXxiiwtNYif2OPKOS2mmIJmRJCSoCiIHD5ZksJMf6YlL7OFDodB1Vk5xW5BPNTdFA-29Qr" width="320" /></a></div>The pilot episode dealt with a criminal psychologist testifying that the man the prosecution were trying to have convicted of multiple murders wasn't barking mad or possessed by a demon and then being recruited by a team, who work for the Catholic church, to essentially do the same thing - a case of is it genuinely evil or is this explained by psychology? It worked and while it wasn't particularly scary, it was clever and intelligent enough not to be treated like a load of bollocks, which <b>SurrealEstate</b> managed within five minutes of its pilot episode. This time it's just three in the team, of which Colter is the man training for the priesthood and very much the Mulder here, who believes in demonic possession and spiritual evil, while the other two are the Scully in the show - both sceptical and looking for the logical rather than the 'fictional' and in the first episode the logical won out, but not without a hefty dose of the spiritual thrown in to make things interesting. This was originally broadcast in 2019 and there's an entire series plus two more in the can for us to watch. I'm not necessarily going to review this like I review weekly serials, but I might dip in and out if we stick with it after a promising start.<p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Is There Life After Mars?</span></i></b></p><p>Just as I forecast last week things are heating up in the best ongoing TV series available on any streaming platform at the moment as <b>For All Mankind</b> went to some places you might have guessed but also to some places you never saw coming - which is why this show is so good. </p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgdr1fs-BZHWMJj_c0EvfqqvXq_s-yjQzzb2-TJvlFMaxoqojdO7JaNGTUj2DRhD378n7-gqdxwfwEmtcpa6eEh1gv8Yj7v0-KE3T2G5OzB6qjeBI-GbRmpkgfuFQ4mVMQK4P_SBH0jDgTDG65YN1rz5reWGdhCVeBKFdrEEd6jmKO4SB-cH_xO_Hw9dm4A" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="237" data-original-width="474" height="160" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgdr1fs-BZHWMJj_c0EvfqqvXq_s-yjQzzb2-TJvlFMaxoqojdO7JaNGTUj2DRhD378n7-gqdxwfwEmtcpa6eEh1gv8Yj7v0-KE3T2G5OzB6qjeBI-GbRmpkgfuFQ4mVMQK4P_SBH0jDgTDG65YN1rz5reWGdhCVeBKFdrEEd6jmKO4SB-cH_xO_Hw9dm4A" width="320" /></a></div>One thing this show never fails at is managing to pull your heartstrings and get you emotional about something; there's at least one thing every series that will bring a tear to your eye or have you wondering how the writers manage to fuck you over with excellent writing and this week's 6th instalment does it in spades as a reunion that was never expected has an unexpected reaction before the expected happens - sorry to be vague but I'm not spoiling it for the people who do watch this excellent TV show. The episode is called Leningrad and that's where most of the action takes place as the M7 nations meet to discuss how to deal with the Goldilocks asteroid conundrum.<p></p><p>Up on Mars, Ed's loss of job means he's drinking and smoking a lot of weed and in need of a new mission and when Helios offers the grunts a ridiculous re-evaluation of their existing contracts, especially with a multi-trillion dollar gift on its way, he decides to get behind the workers and advises them what to do. The North Koreans get involved again, this time to help Miles out who shows he has a very nasty side as the balance of power shifts in the black market racketeering game. All in all by far and away the best episode of the series so far.</p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Next Time...</span></i></b></p><p>While the two Apple TV series we're currently watching still have a few weeks to go before they finish (and there's a new <b>Slow Horses</b> marathon due around New Year), I expect this blog may well be a wee bit erratic over Christmas. We'll just have to see; I mean there's going to be stuff to watch and look out for but we do have stuff that I'm not necessarily going to be reviewing that we'll be watching between now and the New Year - take the seven episodes of <b>The Outsider</b> for starters - I've done that review, there's no need to return to it. If we watch more <b>Evil</b> there's no real need to do a weekly update of a series that is currently filming season 4. There will be new films including <b>Rebel Moon</b> (which got a 1 star review in the Guardian today) and I'm sure the streaming channels will have something else apart from crappy festive movies. We'll just have to wait and see...</p><p> </p>Phil Hallhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12680058800847509275noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5979663737404474935.post-81865923373797743652023-12-09T11:31:00.000+00:002023-12-09T11:31:10.625+00:00Pop Culture - Jewels in the Shite<p><i>There will be spoilers in this because a lot of things discussed will have been watched by the many or will have been out there in TV land for long enough for people to say 'Elvis is dead' without spoiling it.</i></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">At the End of the Universe</span></i></b></p><p>When Russell T Davies said he'd never written or seen an episode of <b>Doctor Who</b> quite like the second special - <i>Wild Blue Yonder</i> - he really wasn't kidding. This was strange, disturbing and apart from a really unnecessary and crap joke involving a mixed race Isaac Newton at the beginning, you get the feeling that this might have been an even better bunch of specials had they kept David Tennant around for an entire series and made the reason for his re-regeneration the main theme of the entire series. That's not to suggest Ncuti Gatwa's not going to be a great Doctor with excellent stories, but this again felt like a piece in a much larger jigsaw puzzle.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEg1lpH_Nar6Xvuc9XYDCZ7CTm-6ENyC846C801OaFnahkvOC16cgvNN_xv7f1B6qAeuwpvYDfPXK63uhmrOxznf9LyJ1xymsZE7utPga-HD2Phfjm1J_mjiAmyPPDrqKokrDX3U5M28MKcbUC3WZV7wxAMgGZy2Qyd3SafUaBJg6d8QGtiTfLaxmqR24kzp" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="314" data-original-width="474" height="212" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEg1lpH_Nar6Xvuc9XYDCZ7CTm-6ENyC846C801OaFnahkvOC16cgvNN_xv7f1B6qAeuwpvYDfPXK63uhmrOxznf9LyJ1xymsZE7utPga-HD2Phfjm1J_mjiAmyPPDrqKokrDX3U5M28MKcbUC3WZV7wxAMgGZy2Qyd3SafUaBJg6d8QGtiTfLaxmqR24kzp" width="320" /></a></div>This time DW and Donna find themselves on a deserted space ship in what appears to be a void, but turns out to be on the other side of the end of the known universe and the Tardis has buggered off in need of repairing itself after coffee was spilled into the main consul, leaving the Doctor without his sonic screwdriver (inspired) and in a place where even he doesn't understand the language. Then things start to get really weird as they try to solve the mystery in front of them only to be confronted by versions of themselves but with problems... Problems isn't the right word, malfunctions might be better except these alien villains are not robots, in fact we're never quite sure what they are except that they adapt themselves and become whatever they adapt themselves with. It's a creepy episode that is almost guaranteed to spook younger audience members and freak out others. It's one of those episodes that offers up snippets you maybe aren't supposed to know about our hero and wanders into nightmare country. It was, again, an above average fair.<div><p>I've read a lot of dissenting opinions about this already on line and frankly these people need to get fucking lives. I think the problem with these dysfunctional Whovians is they want Doctor Who to be what they want it to be and they'd probably moan if the Doctor jumped out of the screen and gave them a blowjob halfway through an episode. Sad, pathetic wankers who don't seem to understand that television is made for the masses and not for them.</p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">X Marks the Spot? Not Really</span></i></b></p><p>ITV went to great lengths to advertise how good ITVX is. They employed celebrity B listers to tell us how good it was and almost everything ITV does now is advertised as also being on ITVX. As regular readers of this column will know, I've developed a soft spot for Wrexham AFC and their FA Cup 2nd Round tie against Yeovil was being shown live... on ITVX, so I put the telly on and summoned the streaming guide on my (allegedly) smart TV. </p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgOqx1hcR9RstlUoMLMD5aI8dnoc9y0WlocjkeK6zFD0L7mgOAGPeQ_CBzpTxCuHs4Xv_e7dpWJNNzssGxcEUL_Ct0v2PzRHXPb6BRBtxmBvxcAZk2Quu1LlSfU8GeYglPYYI-pxrBOhAI4oAAxGeetLsjSKahcd7zPSAHAWAWd3AfrMOoYMqOapsqCyd-2" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="337" data-original-width="600" height="113" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgOqx1hcR9RstlUoMLMD5aI8dnoc9y0WlocjkeK6zFD0L7mgOAGPeQ_CBzpTxCuHs4Xv_e7dpWJNNzssGxcEUL_Ct0v2PzRHXPb6BRBtxmBvxcAZk2Quu1LlSfU8GeYglPYYI-pxrBOhAI4oAAxGeetLsjSKahcd7zPSAHAWAWd3AfrMOoYMqOapsqCyd-2=w200-h113" width="200" /></a></div>It too over 5 minutes to load ITVX into my streaming options (BBC iPlayer takes about 7 seconds); when it finally loaded I couldn't find the football match anywhere. I looked through the menu, checked the sports section and did a search for it and all of this took about 12 minutes (by which time I'd missed the first goal). In fact despite it being 'on' ITVX it wasn't actually on ITVX, it was on-line ITVX - a subsection of the station I wasn't aware existed. It's like the BBC's Red Button except it isn't because you can access the BBC's Red Button on your telly. Not only was this a fucking disaster, but you can't rewind, pause or do anything else with ITVX; you either start it from the beginning or watch it from where it is, even if you're watching something that isn't on live. It has all the adverts - you have to pay a premium to have the adverts removed, and on-line there's a huge fuck off Pizza Express banner that takes up almost ΒΌ of the page - unlike iPlayer, it really is a massive load of rancid shit, a bit like ITV has always been since I was a kid. I watched the game on my PC; they showed the two goals at half time and I saw the third go in relatively live - because it had been on the BBC Football page for two minutes before it 'caught up' on the live stream. What an absolute load of wank... Actually wanks are fulfilling and have an end product that's not as messy or as stinky. <p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">More Horse Play</span></i></b></p><p>Do you know why Apple TV's <b>Slow Horses</b> has such a good rating on IMDB and is so highly regarded by the critics? Because it's bloody excellent and it simply doesn't hang about. This MI5 series can't really be called a true spy thriller because we're not really talking about espionage and John Le Carre stuff, we're talking anti-terrorist and intelligence work undergone by people who should be too good to be policemen. It's a series about clever people trying to outwit proper bad guys or in this case trying to fuck each other over to get the best political advantage from it.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhbrdKfWfPzu31uX1Zl-qKVOE6hv-LkqN42KeXxAE7dV28IlslXQn-bNpDk2P3F6vosHzwulrDrj3Y5nY5S4ZnSMZPc5KnDpSEhZCiBoXPYRX5w3hNyw_Bu5DdCZ0kHdztiJbJyAgijm_q_k8QP3ZAvCXO0GzbiE8_-mv8ObtWw0QLDqc7UH4e3T-CA4qfO" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="473" data-original-width="838" height="181" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhbrdKfWfPzu31uX1Zl-qKVOE6hv-LkqN42KeXxAE7dV28IlslXQn-bNpDk2P3F6vosHzwulrDrj3Y5nY5S4ZnSMZPc5KnDpSEhZCiBoXPYRX5w3hNyw_Bu5DdCZ0kHdztiJbJyAgijm_q_k8QP3ZAvCXO0GzbiE8_-mv8ObtWw0QLDqc7UH4e3T-CA4qfO" width="320" /></a></div>The first season - as I touched on last week - was about far right wing terror cells and how far they stretch into the Establishment, but it's a little more complex than that because the ambitious Diana (Kristin Scott-Thomas) - 2nd in charge of MI5 - had this great idea to stage a right wing act of terror and then thwart it before it reaches completion only for it to go absolutely tits up. This required her covering her arse and she decided that Jackson Lamb (Gary Oldman) and his team of MI5 fuck-ups should take the fall for it only to realise she was not up against a team of fuckwits at all. The team members of Lamb's Slough House (or Slow Horses) are actually clever, resourceful and damaged because of MI5 not born that way. They might have all screwed up at some point in their pasts, but that doesn't make them any less capable.<p></p><p>Each season is a rollercoaster ride - just six parts - that resolves problems and conundrums quickly but like all puzzles of this kind there's always a can of worms attached to get opened and make matters worse. It's the kind of series someone like me - a person who gets slightly perturbed by how some TV series (and seasons) like to tread water for half their allotted runs when all I want is a start, a middle and an ending with the occasional epilogue thrown in. <b>Slow Horses</b> does that in spades; no pfaffing about, just BAM BAM BAM. Chalk this one down as yet another Apple TV+ success story; a TV network that currently reminds me of what Channel 4 used to be like with dramas.</p><p>In fact, we were so impressed with the conclusion and entire series, we watched season two straight away. We do like it when we discover good television, it makes up for all the shit. Season two is about Russian spies, whether a 'fictitious' spymaster existed and whether or not there were sleeper agents placed throughout the UK. It also is how the Slow Horses team continue to prove, despite their foibles, how good they are at their jobs, or at least some of them. One thing from season two was obvious, the brilliant Gary Oldman, as Jackson Lamb, actually quite likes River Cartwright (Jack Lowden), even if he dumps him in potentially life-threatening situations. The interesting thing about the second season is it's more like a spy thriller with twists and turns and red herrings all over the place. This is quality TV. </p><p> <b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Awfully Bad Boys</span></i></b></p><p>Michael Bay - check. Jerry Bruckheimer - check. Explosions - check. Slow motion close ups - check. Fucking awful film - check. Jesus wept vomit have you ever watched <b>Bad Boys</b>? Did you think it was anything but an absolute load of rancid horse ejaculate? My god, what an execrable pile of ... Jeez, I've run out of insults. There is nothing more I can say...</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEj3gOrDXAK7qCxsJ3SRemP6AuQlWTWQmCAC_ymGs9memUkAcJAF_PLcTAp0IYFo_BM93sHCCbgkGrp7H8CoUKOHtJJceDL_JftDu29v52NSuoJwWY9Tv-tBKmvSFFB4vDYL1SzouHsUf8hLqQXR1x0CFSaRfPGFLZmq256Lza_wuBZMsJjPn1ldfWtLgOLl" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="1697" data-original-width="2560" height="212" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEj3gOrDXAK7qCxsJ3SRemP6AuQlWTWQmCAC_ymGs9memUkAcJAF_PLcTAp0IYFo_BM93sHCCbgkGrp7H8CoUKOHtJJceDL_JftDu29v52NSuoJwWY9Tv-tBKmvSFFB4vDYL1SzouHsUf8hLqQXR1x0CFSaRfPGFLZmq256Lza_wuBZMsJjPn1ldfWtLgOLl" width="320" /></a></div>Well, obviously there is. <b>Bad Boys</b> was made in 1995 and while that's almost 30 years ago it feels like it could have been 50. Absolutely everything about this film was shite. The expletive drenched dialogue; the lack of a coherent script; the unbelievable amount of shouting... sorry SHOUTING!!! The overwrought performances; the contrived set-ups and plot; the fact that Martin Lawrence gets top billing over Will Smith, who, quite unbelievably, was by a country mile the best thing in this utter heap of human excrement. The 1990s was a fantastic decade for many things, especially music, but it clearly wasn't good for Michael Bay directed action 'thrillers' because this film is, allegedly, very popular and has spawned two sequels and there's a fourth film planned for next year. I actually had <b>Bad Boys 2</b> lined up to watch but I'm just going to punch myself in the face repeatedly because I'm sure that will be more fun and fulfilling. This film doesn't have a coherent story; it makes no sense; it has a comedy premise that doesn't need to be one; it is driven by literally a witness to a murder refusing to speak to anyone but an absent Will Smith, so Martin 'Why the fuck was I famous' Lawrence has to pretend for most of the film that he's Smith. Tea Leoni is in this film; she can't act, she's not pretty, she does things completely out of character and her actions are ludicrous. Joe Pantoliano plays a police captain, all he does is shout, sorry SHOUT, like everyone else in this film. It's just awful; pathetically, stupidly, woefully awful. If you like this film you are a moron.<p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">And Then More Shit</span></i></b></p><p><i>"We do like it when we discover good television, it makes up for all the shit."</i> Is a quote I lifted from the review about <b>Slow Horses</b> and how appropriate it was when we watched <b>SurrealEstate</b> a series from the usually awful SyFy Channel and this was about par for the station's course. It was ... how did I describe it? An unsatisfying bland wank with no orgasm.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgTP2wFecSBiMsK7xa6tS9hkr3K6bEwqk9j6JRPGMB0rONJ3FWGODqFWl1H5NltMRsCTyF13gkchBv3P2IjOOhffoXLp_vJpRB9hFuMwQEtsg5JXLdXk4lMlsLORkWH2NhVLVsLTK8dkslHu0GdjjzGrxDA9UGDafKdOMe57El5KMXqnlv4KrEnDr6HIGTt" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="1080" data-original-width="1920" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgTP2wFecSBiMsK7xa6tS9hkr3K6bEwqk9j6JRPGMB0rONJ3FWGODqFWl1H5NltMRsCTyF13gkchBv3P2IjOOhffoXLp_vJpRB9hFuMwQEtsg5JXLdXk4lMlsLORkWH2NhVLVsLTK8dkslHu0GdjjzGrxDA9UGDafKdOMe57El5KMXqnlv4KrEnDr6HIGTt" width="320" /></a></div>I'm going out on a limb here but I think this was one of the most heinous crimes against television I've ever seen and yet it manages a 7.1 rating on IMDB. All I can think is the people who rated this series have all got some kind of brain disease or they wouldn't know a good TV show if it bit them on the arse and offered them something more than an unsatisfying bland wank. I mean, this shite was renewed for a second season, which suggests to me that people actually watched it, probably enjoyed it and that simply can't be right...<p></p><p>We gave the first episode a watch; figuring that as a 'pilot' it would skimp on the waffle and filler and would go straight for the thing that first episodes go for, yet somehow it managed to do nothing for 44 minutes. It promised much and delivered lots of mumbling and not much else. The newest recruit appears to have a history of telekinesis - fire starting to be precise, and the first mention of this was when she realised the teenage protagonist was the cause of the poltergeist activity, at almost the end of the episode. There's also a comedy defrocked priest, a man who quotes things and is bald, an office manager with an attitude and Tim Rozon as the heartthrob head of the estate agency that deals with strange events, Luke Roman - who mumbles a lot, has a Michael Buble feel and really can't act - in fact he's a bit like a real estate agent. What we had was the aforementioned 'poltergeist' (was actually a teenage girl with latent telekinesis) and a woman - studying to be a doctor, who looked like she was in her late 30s - with a house that had a portal to hell. Both were tied up and solved so quickly I thought maybe I'd missed something and then I realised what was missing - a decent writer, some actors and its imminent cancellation, none of which are forthcoming. Rest assured there won't be a return to <b>SurrealEstate</b>. </p><p>The thing is back in the late 1970s, a band that I really like called Be Bop Deluxe had a song on their final album called Surreal Estate and I always thought the title was such a brilliant play on words. It was something that inspired me and I always thought it would be excellent if someone took that title and made a truly awe-inspiring book, film or TV series out of it. Imagine how fucking disappointed I was when this pile of rancid dog shit came along. The SyFy Channel should be shut down; it hasn't made anything half decent for 15 years.</p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Trailer Trash</span></i></b></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgO55g5NdXpNPk3zwL94VXHN8_nch3lP1oCzkq-qtu6hCHsJ4hLYu5f9t2_lZjGPbmwRnQncNHGa2NhJAl_tIO9LsPNPkmenWqMGx3GCYmJCiB1_gsO6DkhF3X_sRLI5m5auJ7Z2GPcZQjc4HPV94v0E7A26Pe2fUeNmUuEZUhUVFjlivmkprYPKly5cHF8" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="248" data-original-width="474" height="167" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgO55g5NdXpNPk3zwL94VXHN8_nch3lP1oCzkq-qtu6hCHsJ4hLYu5f9t2_lZjGPbmwRnQncNHGa2NhJAl_tIO9LsPNPkmenWqMGx3GCYmJCiB1_gsO6DkhF3X_sRLI5m5auJ7Z2GPcZQjc4HPV94v0E7A26Pe2fUeNmUuEZUhUVFjlivmkprYPKly5cHF8" width="320" /></a></div>This week's big trailer is <b>Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire</b> and what a pile of hooey it looks. There's one scene in it where Kong and Godzilla are running, yes Godzilla is running. But this does look like a new look Godzilla with glowing pink rather than blue bits and a more streamlined look; how he got encased in ice is anyone's guess. There's a baby giant orangutan, a big scar-faced giant orangutan, other big apes, an ape hand with an exo-skeleton attached. Rebecca Hall sporting a new hair do, Dan Stevens - who I recently said we'd never seen anything in that was crap - and a few of the last film's characters. I'm presuming the New Empire bit means we're going to see an as yet unknown titan emerge who will be able to kick arse; if it's an orangutan then I'm slightly confused because they're never depicted as anything but the least aggressive and most friendly of primates. I guarantee you this will stink cinemas out in 2024.<p></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">A Pile of Shit at the Arse End of Iceland</span></i></b></p><p>If we hadn't invested a lot of time - about 70 minutes each episode - on <b>A Murder at the End of the World</b> we would have given it up by now. I think the only reasons we've stuck with it is a) to find out who the Silver Serial Killer was and b) to see if it gets any worse. One observation I have is that Clive Owen was good in <b>Children of Men</b> but everything else we've seen him in proves he's a lousy actor. Another observation is this Britt Marling scripted series is just dog shit. Moving on...</p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">There's Some Shit in the Barn</span></i></b></p><p>As the credits began to roll, the wife turned to me and said, "So, what have you got to say about that then?" It appears that the quality threshold in the Hall house has disappeared completely and been replaced by a Portaloo. There is no hope for me, I seem to have become attracted to all forms of excrement and there's probably no way to stop it. It might be terminal...</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjAv148prLEUNpGuAZKrgtKPWoDD7KXGe4JT1gERS5W6XK-TWdn9oPUxcIr0cbgnGXEbY7Mo0CKA8198BPYjGYUC9nze5wh4Mtwz0zwjCn3vPyfLPnoq5MM7ed_B7xUrnEamFWJslpocireYR-lH6tkpjkSuqUVnTZ_qgyrHt4eM6yBTTLF7wTDy1dmVXVt" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="680" data-original-width="1170" height="186" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjAv148prLEUNpGuAZKrgtKPWoDD7KXGe4JT1gERS5W6XK-TWdn9oPUxcIr0cbgnGXEbY7Mo0CKA8198BPYjGYUC9nze5wh4Mtwz0zwjCn3vPyfLPnoq5MM7ed_B7xUrnEamFWJslpocireYR-lH6tkpjkSuqUVnTZ_qgyrHt4eM6yBTTLF7wTDy1dmVXVt" width="320" /></a></div><b>There's Something in the Barn</b> is a real nadir in this week's film and television viewing and frankly if you've got this far in the blog you will realise that for this to be the absolute worst then it really has to be bad. If I was to say 'imagine Gremlins with malevolent garden gnomes in Norway' you might actually think, 'Hmm, that sounds fucked up enough to be good,' and you would be so wrong it would make you limp - that's limp both sexually and ambulatory. It would make you impotent and fuck up one of your legs. It would make you want to claw your eyes out and shove them in your ears. It is possibly the worst thing we've seen this or any other year and I feel really sorry for Norway because while they're no Hollywood, they do make some good TV shows and films - not brilliant, but better than this will ever be considered. <p></p><p>This 100 minutes of celluloid vomit has the following people in it - Martin Starr, Amrita Acharia, Townes Bunner, Zoe Winther-Hansen and it wastes Henriette Steenstrup (the mother of Thor and Loki in <b>Ragnarok</b>) and her ability to be a good comedic actor. Zoe Winther-Hansen plays an American girl, she's actually from Finland (but I never knew Rebecca Ferguson was Swedish, so...) and she says 'fuck' a lot. The reason I give you this list of people is because, with the exception of Steenstrup, you should avoid anything with any of these people in it, even if it's just a swimming pool or a public toilet or even a supermarket; if you see them run away as fast as your legs will carry you. If you haven't got legs, throw yourself in the nearest river because death would be a blessed release. This is a film about a family of really annoying Americans who inherit a house in Norway with a barn elf who gets pissed off with them - easily done - and gets help from all the other barn elves in Norway to wreak havoc until it ends. I wanted the barn elves to win and as there was a kind of truce at the end I figured the man who made it got so fed up he decided to make it a kind of draw. The scenes of snowy Norway (although it might have been Sweden or Finland, given the number of Swedes and Fins who worked on the film) were pretty. Even the moose was bad CGI.</p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Continuity Errors</span></i></b></p><p>In a week largely dominated by shite, I really wanted the Cary Grant biopic series, <b>Archie</b>, to be quality TV and in some ways it was. Jason Isaacs as Grant was almost faultless, Laura Aikman as Dyan Cannon was almost as good, but unfortunately everything else about it felt very... ITV.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgvwQ2Yfx8MVxMfoC65J8g-nH5riZRmRMyghh6u1bndIeFLkEOjjixORWqt7thjJTRh6zWbKGnqt9nnBNl-PZNWD9y-bOnz9i1gkOfF8H5wakXEoKXDhBEEFmU1jz7_k3bNMRNQUlCMNcp7lZYf68caaLSIlGI-Yw6q-2LPOkUr0X1fJZpO6oRxsIPschyt" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="200" data-original-width="300" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgvwQ2Yfx8MVxMfoC65J8g-nH5riZRmRMyghh6u1bndIeFLkEOjjixORWqt7thjJTRh6zWbKGnqt9nnBNl-PZNWD9y-bOnz9i1gkOfF8H5wakXEoKXDhBEEFmU1jz7_k3bNMRNQUlCMNcp7lZYf68caaLSIlGI-Yw6q-2LPOkUr0X1fJZpO6oRxsIPschyt" width="320" /></a></div>There was just this profound feeling of cheap and nasty about it and it was also extremely British despite Grant or Archie Leach as he was originally known being from Bristol. I'm not entirely sure any one in the series was American and I think much of it was shot on location in Europe, but really the worst thing about it, despite it being produced by Cannon and Grant's daughter Jennifer, was the glaring continuity errors and if you, like me, know anything about classic films you'd understand why... For starters, the first episode of the four part series suggests that Grant and Cannon first met at some point late 1961, maybe early 1962, however there's a scene in which Grant is talking to Alfred Hitchcock on the set of <b>North By North West</b> about having to get a divorce and that there was possibly someone new in his life - this film was made in 1958 and released in 1959, and that was a bit like the straw that broke my concentration and interest. I mean, I know it sounds trivial, but if the ex-wife in question and their daughter are going to executive produce a biopic you'd think they'd get the dates right and whoever was making it would, you know, check Wikipedia or IMDB or something to see they weren't getting it all a bit chronologically challenged.<p></p><p>We decided that the other three parts were not really worth watching; not because of this error, but because there was also something of a whitewash going on; none of Grant's less public areas of his life were going to be looked at. this means no real mention of the 12 years he lived with Randolph Scott - I mean, it will be mentioned but it will be a platonic set-up with two hunky heterosexual men living the bachelors' life. There also won't be a mention of Grant's extensive use of LSD, his right wing politics or the fact he was something of a pig to most of his wives. One episode was quite enough.<br /></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">The Curse of the Walking Dead?</span></i></b></p><p>Imagine my disappointment; Friday nights are good TV nights, so after the disappointments of the last week it was a chance to kick back and enjoy two of my favourite programmes. Except <b>Monarch: Legacy of Monsters</b> took a dip last week and this week it didn't improve; in fact it was the second weak episode on the trot and I'm wondering if this show has run out of steam.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEingT7TkLCI_eFBuG8TCIblkV_s4xEuLy_2qMyCtmn5FHvDymffSUqktZfdUh8H6tYjqSgJ5KpC-WOvw1jKECEWt-YqV56Gs2xqKKUDvjebLQSUVcssLne0Zj5RelMFIBxdPb_nqld0XVow0Uax2I8tH9bV7-Qovk6tsnKgqjbBkCnQLnVLgo8MxeJXAwdL" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="315" data-original-width="474" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEingT7TkLCI_eFBuG8TCIblkV_s4xEuLy_2qMyCtmn5FHvDymffSUqktZfdUh8H6tYjqSgJ5KpC-WOvw1jKECEWt-YqV56Gs2xqKKUDvjebLQSUVcssLne0Zj5RelMFIBxdPb_nqld0XVow0Uax2I8tH9bV7-Qovk6tsnKgqjbBkCnQLnVLgo8MxeJXAwdL" width="320" /></a></div>The reason I've given this such a derogatory sub-title is because our three young seekers of truth have been released by Monarch and are back in San Francisco breaking the news to Kate's mother about Hiroshi's double life. SF is a ruin that is heavily guarded by the army to prevent looters after the destruction caused by Godzilla in the 2014 film, but Kate's mom now works for the federal government and is allowed into the fenced off area where her husband's office is, so she takes a risk and sticks the three kids in the back of a van and takes them there, warning about potentially being shot for being looters. 'They will shoot you! Don't be seen or THEY WILL SHOOT YOU!' She tells Kate, Kentaro and May, so off they trot and before you know it they're singing Japanese adverts - loudly - and almost getting caught, not once, but twice by the National Guard. They're running around with torches and singing songs while soldiers with guns are chasing anything that moves - there's your Walking Dead reference.<p></p><p>It also told us that Kate is a two-timing lesbian (that was new) who after countless scary situations running from Monarch, a giant frost monster and the possibility of dying in frozen Alaska suddenly is having panic attacks because she's near the school she worked at. Just to add (or is that subtract) it turns out that May has decided to double cross her pals and has sold out to Monarch. Oh and the only monsters this week were some flashbacks to Godzilla's last appearance; nothing new to see there either. All the great promise this show had in the opening three episodes has been blown to smithereens in the last two parts. There might not be any way back from this kind of shite plotting and scripts.<br /></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">At Least We Still Have Mars</span></i></b></p><p>The latest episode of <b>For All Mankind</b> has finally revealed its hand. We knew this series would largely be about an asteroid worth more than the entire planet and it wasn't the one we saw briefly in episode one; this one is about to do a fly-by of Mars in about four months and as it's worth trillions and trillions of dollars, it needs to be snagged and mined.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjHQoChUGMeADPeGNc3hUmTHS8DK_UhkMJJDi5lSyJkSa01BT_Zqtxe9dAiqlS_9ecUZF2ZCPWIY9-YQMz1bcmiH-KxPz8T4CjtGt2wjiQtR6uNeS29ldIabUNkwFyTFFVLGrq0msho6JI4v8FCSH6wyZU0COR1W0y81K2482zFB3bAMfbID4JIxSKBb1vH" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="291" data-original-width="474" height="196" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjHQoChUGMeADPeGNc3hUmTHS8DK_UhkMJJDi5lSyJkSa01BT_Zqtxe9dAiqlS_9ecUZF2ZCPWIY9-YQMz1bcmiH-KxPz8T4CjtGt2wjiQtR6uNeS29ldIabUNkwFyTFFVLGrq0msho6JI4v8FCSH6wyZU0COR1W0y81K2482zFB3bAMfbID4JIxSKBb1vH" width="320" /></a></div>Then there's the politics going on, especially when President Al Gore declares he's the guy who found the thing, when he clearly did not - but I don't need to tell you that - and this causes all kinds of friction between the M7 countries.<p></p><p>Dev decides he's bailing on the earth and leaving for Mars, with Kelly and Aleida left in charge of Helios, except he wants Kelly to go with him because she has to train the people who are going to use the life discovering rovers, while Aleida has to go to the Soviet Union for a conference of the M7 nations and we all know that means she's going to bump into Margo, who is presumed dead and also a known traitor.</p><p>Meanwhile on Mars, Miles has had his secret revealed unintentionally and that's going to cause grief with his Russian black market boss and Admiral Ed's potential Parkinson's has been revealed so Danielle has pulled him from both flight duty and as her XO. We're half way through the series and it's finally really kicking off; we were also treated to flashbacks to what really happened after the North Korean was found on Mars at the end of last season and if I had one quibble; if there's a ten year gap between series, how come Kelly's son is only 7?<br /></p><p><b><i><span style="font-size: x-large;">Next Time...</span></i></b></p><p>We're not going to start watching season three of <b>Slow Horses</b> until Christmas, after we've got all six parts; after watching the first two series over the space of five days, waiting a week for each new part to come out will be too much waiting.</p><p><b>For All Mankind</b> tends to ramp up everything in the second half of seasons, so I expect some interesting developments and shocks; this isn't a show that skimps on killing its stars. <b>Monarch</b> needs, desperately, to regain its mojo and I'm not sure it can. If you noticed there was no Bill Bailey this week, that's because we've given up on it; it only had one part to go and as its trajectory had been downward from the first part we figured we weren't missing anything. Oh and the penultimate part of the murder in Iceland bollocks, which in the intervening two days since we watched it is in danger of never being realised as well. I'm getting old, I might die missing things I want to watch in favour of things that are crap or annoying.</p><p>There's a couple of new feature films to watch; a few old ones and we're obviously getting closer to <i>that</i> time, so everything is going to be short on quality and high on shite...</p><p> </p></div>Phil Hallhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12680058800847509275noreply@blogger.com0