Loud Farts

The wife and I were watching something on the box and there was something about debt collecting. One thing leads to another; I make a joke about exciting new ways to collect debts and she says, "I've always wanted to send a letter to people who owe us money, with me holding a gun to a puppy's head with the message saying. 'Pay up or the puppy gets it!'"

Searching Google, this was the best I could come up with:

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I haven't told the wife this, yet, but I phoned the dole office today to see about signing on and getting my stamp paid or whatever the modern equivalent is. I'm entitled to income based JSA, which is a benefit not a superhero team and I will be eligible for it when my redundancy money is deemed spent. I didn't find this from the dole office because trying to talk to an operative there is like trying to contact Facebook. Nigh on impossible. What I had to do was ring up and give a number for them to contact me. It was all automated, there was no one for me to ask any questions. It was frustrating. They haven't called back.

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The car goes in for a service tomorrow; it's going to cost in excess of £200. One of the pitfalls of buying a new car; what you don't pay in MOT charges, you do in service. It's come at a bad time, what with my former employer's slightly screwing up my salary and waiting almost a 5 weeks before they pay me my redundancy. Some of my friends have suggested that I should have got everything I'm owed when I left; that hasn't been the case; not by a long chalk.

My salary slip showed one amount. The sum paid into my account was another. My mileage hasn't been paid and I had had no indication of when I'd get my severance pay until I went to the boss. He couldn't tell me, but thinks it'll be the end of June.

We're not well off by any stretch and this has meant that we're decidedly poor at a time when my income has dropped £22,000 a year!

No wonder I'm really optimistic and enthusiastic about the coming weeks...

That was sarcasm, in case you needed to be told.

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I know most of the people who read this tend to skip over my rants about football, which is why I always signpost them. But considering we gave the world the game, we certainly get treated by the governing body like a syphilis epidemic in a girls' school.

I'm inclined to suggest that as we don't stand a snowball's chance in hell of ever winning the World Cup, let alone hosting it again; the FA and the Premier League should boycott FIFA. Tell them to shove their organisation.

Apologies for the language, but Sepp Blatter really is a cunt.

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Radio 6. Not terribly impressed. Started listening to it at the start of the week and have persevered. Not totally sure what the remit is especially when they play Love is in the Air by John Paul Young, but I have heard some things this week that I've enjoyed. Several Led Zeppelin tracks; a new song by the Horrors, who I don't know, but this sounds like The Damned meet Pre-Hillage Simple Minds and a track that the Jo woman who is doing the afternoon show at the moment has played. Both times she's neglected to tell me (or anyone else) who it's by.

I love that on a radio show.

That was sarcasm, in case you needed to be told.