Saturday, May 12, 2012

2012 - 29

Bright Lights

There's this odd yellow thing sitting in the sky. I was eyeing it with suspicion, but was surprised and delighted that this strange phenomena was making me feel warm and putting a smile on my face. I have no idea what it means; it could be the beginning of the end of the world for all I know, but apart from hurting my eyes when I look at it, I'm thinking it's a bonus. I think I will christen it 'The Sun'.

It's arrival has prompted Fishwife to declare the ascendancy of summer. I was in the garden, looking slightly puzzled at the strange light that was bathing the garden, when I heard him say to one of his boys that 'today is good day for a barbecue'. Of course it is; any day when this shiny orb appears is a good day for a barbecue. It doesn't matter that you need this pile of burning embers to warm you up against the gale force northerly winds; if you can char meat then go for it.

A couple of Easters ago, the one where it fell at the end of March, it was horrid. The temperature on Easter Sunday was about 4 degrees, but it was sunny. We got back from walking the dogs and as I got out of the car, I turned to the wife and said, "Can you smell that?" She could indeed; someone was having a barbecue.

About an hour later, there's a knock at the door and my mate Tony, who was passing, was there. The first words out of his mouth were "Some c*nt is having a barbecue. Are people mad?"

20 years ago barbecues were the kind of thing you had once, maybe twice a year, it was like a treat and, of course, if you're a carnivore the range of burnable meat products far outweighs those of a vegetarian variety. Now days, it only has to stop raining and some twat is out there soaking coals in paraffin and incinerating lumps of poorly processed fat.

Don't get me wrong; I actually like the things, always have; but that might be because I spent most of my first 7 years in Canada, where barbecues are almost as popular as they are in Australia, and most every country park in Canada has built in grills in just about every picnic area, or they did in 1968...

Actually, that gives me an interesting project to look into. My nieces have got my suitcase full of old family photos, many of which are from Canada. I have to retrieve them from the pit that is Daventry at some point in the next couple of months, so I'll scan an entire swathe of Canada pics to illustrate what our life was like over 40 years ago. Seems like a better plan than playing Spider Solitaire for the entire summer, because I can't take the netbook outside (or have a barbecue).

This is How Exciting My Week Has Been

I might have to take up hang gliding or pot holing, maybe train for the Iron Man challenge or take up mountain climbing. Power walking perhaps, a little more sedate, but still an activity. The reason I say this is because the highlight of my week was having two pints of Oakham Citra - a beer that is both dry, bitter and is reminiscent of alcoholic grapefruit juice. It is also one of the best beers I have ever had, but that still doesn't excuse it from being a piss poor high point.

It had a few low points - as previously mentioned (blogs passim) - none of which did much to lift my mood. Yes, I have been happier this week than last, but I'm beginning to feel like a poorly paid whore and a conversation with someone who got a job that I had applied for in the summer made me realise that there is a good chance that all major employers are essentially a shower of shit.

Further developments when the inevitable happens.

  • I'm still listening to the same thing.
  • I'm still reading the same thing.
  • I'm still watching the same things.
  • Today is like Sunday; tomorrow will be like Saturday but with no day of rest following to drown my sorrows.
  • Spent all of the week moaning about Amazon and then realised I should read emails more closely.
  • A bingo caller's nightmare.

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